i don’t talk about this aspect of the series much but the portrayal of tohru’s grieving process is so poignant and heartbreaking. like i think it’s one of the things fruits basket did best.
i think that in grief it’s not that they died, because it’s hard to even comprehend that, it’s that they’re gone. Like something was once there and now it’s not. tohru keeps her mom with her at all times, with the picture, the lessons she’s been taught, the anecdotes.
i also think how she interacts with people regarding it is very accurate, she gets insecure in season 2 over discussing her mom too much, because she’s afraid she’s making the zodiac feel bad and making it all about her. i think this resonates with those who have lost people and don’t know how to interact with others over it. she doesn’t want to take away attention from others, but she doesn’t want to never talk about her mother.
and finally, tohru’s need to help isn’t just inherent kindness (the series has said kindness is a choice), while she is kind, she cannot bear more loss. it also allows her to not look inward and think about what she wants for herself, which is why it took her so long to realize her feelings for kyo. one of the most important plot lines and conflicts of the series still stems from the very beginning, because that is how much grief can color your life.
her allowing herself to live for herself, is a form of healing from all she’s been through. and i think her mom would be proud :,)
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