shitposting my way through life

Hi! Hope you're having a nice day 💜 Cuz I'm not

[goodbyemary-goodbyejane]

Do your parents ever get so close to hitting you that you mind of wish they actually would

Because then at least it's not just this constant suspense and fear hanging in the air

And at least then you can actually know you're being abused because physical abuse is actually there

Instead of just constantly doubting yourself because you can't tell if you're being emotionally abused or if you're just being selfish

I don't know how to phrase this and I'm just ranting but maybe someone else can understand?

[goodbyemary-goodbyejane]

This was on an anti-bullying poster at my school

I just

?????????????

[goodbyemary-goodbyejane]

one time i had an assignment on mohenjo-daro and we had to look up what the people there ate and on the list it said they ate a lot of melons so innocent little 11-year-old me looked up 'melons' on google to add a picture to my assignment and let's just say i got way more than i bargained for

[goodbyemary-goodbyejane]

my mother: but if you cut your hair short you'll look like a lesbian!

me: well mum do i have news for you,

[leia-organa]

Ezra Miller photographed by Ryan Pfluger for Playboy Magazine.

[jimmysea]

EZRA MILLER © Ryan Pfluger for Playboy Magazine (2018)

[otherwindow]

Mermaids with hair over their eyes are usually from deeper waters. The sea floor has almost no light, so deep sea mermaids (few of which have functional eyes) visiting the surface would be blinded by the sun. 

To mermaids, covering their eyes with hair is similar to sunglasses.

[otherwindow]

Deep sea mermaids are also shy, accustomed to dark waters for hiding their monstrous appearances. Freshwater Mermaid: Howdy y'all, I’d like you to meet my cousin. She’s a little shy :) 30ft Tall Deep Sea Mermaid with hair so long it turns the water black: ᴴᵉʷʷᵒ

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

ART PROMPT

[hellishues]

This was very messy but its 2:29am what more do you want from me

[goodbyemary-goodbyejane]

current mood: that 'la la la la la' with guitar strumming song from Gilmore Girls

[goodbyemary-goodbyejane]

Whoever made this movie was on so many drugs

[goodbyemary-goodbyejane]

Listening to my playlist and a song started with "i don't like my mind right now, stacking up problems that are so unnecessary" and it took me a good ten seconds to realise it was heavy by linkin park and not a 21 pilots song

[goodbyemary-goodbyejane]

i wanna die but i don't wanna kill myself, u feel?

[maybe-you-need-this]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

*someone posts selfie* wow they’re kinda attracti—

*remembers teenagers are on this site*

*checks op’s bio, they’re a minor*

what a sweet kid…a cute bean… you deserve only good things…be happy and safe little muffin… I wonder if I could pull off that eyeliner…

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i spent the first part of my life as an overachieving gifted child and now i am a dumbass by choice. i’ve never been so happy

[tsolingas]

This has honestly helped my mood a lot thank you

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i say a lot of smart things in mostly dumb ways

[th3diff3r3nt1]

What if you said really dumb things in smart ways?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

then you belong in academia 

[aroacevampire]

What about saying really dumb things in dumb ways?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

a promising career in republican politics

[toastingtotheghosts]

smart things in smart ways?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

yeah you wish

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

What hogwarts house would you be in?

[thornheartless]

I literally didn’t realise what was different about the sorting hat for a moment and nearly scrolled past this

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

sadly, that happens

[welovewaves]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

don’t live with me if you’re not prepared for me to occasionally jump out from under your bed

[snailpurrse]

me having a mental breakdown: I’m so useless

Gaud, unnaturally quickly shooting out from under my bed: NO FEELING BAD IN MY HOUSE

[science-jumps]

Me: get outta my house

Gaud, already resting feet on my dresser, :

[dead-meme-necromancer-deactivat]

Me: I have school, please.

Gaud, who has set up a hammock under my loft bed: all your jackets are mine now

[tigersharks-moving]

Me, folding the laundry: are you going to help?

Gaud, setting up a blanket fort by my desk: nah

[honey-pot-hobbies]

Me, waking up for school at 5:30 with an alarm: I told you you’d regret this

Gaudy: I will consume your teachers

[straightuplance-deactivated2019]

Me, changing for the third time: Jesus i look horrible today.

Gaud, slaps me: Be an anarchist. Love yourself. Love yourself out of spite.

[dr-woodsprite]

Me, coming home from 36-hour shift collapses onto the bed without so much as a greeting.

Gaud, the mother hen *muttering*, removes my shoes and puts a comforter on me and promptly goes back under the bed.