Losing it that this still says Five Guys

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@gretagetsbetter
Losing it that this still says Five Guys
"why do we even have that lever" is made funnier by the fact there are only 2 levers to begin with (disguised as a pair of tusks on a statue)
i find the implications hilarious:
kronk only had to remember the location of one lever, and couldn't even manage that
but on the other hand, it's easy to get two identical unlabelled levers confused, this one's on yzma tbh
yzma only needed to make one lever to begin with, but she actively chose to turn the second tusk into a functioning trapdoor. she could have just...just not connected the second tusk to anything. it didn't need to have a function
upon reflection, this also answers the question itself: "why do we even HAVE that lever?" it's because yzma herself specifically designed it as a booby trap. "why do we have that lever?" because yzma had it built to keep people out of her secret lair! yzma made the very purposeful choice to put that lever there! and then both she and her inept henchman immediately forgot about her own booby trap! yzma that is YOUR LEVER!!!!!
Reblog if you can speak, read, or at least kinda communicate in more than one language.
whenever i spend my day outside when the weather is good i’m like wow i’ve finally unlocked the secret to inner peace
oh i do try my very best to be not a bastard but my heart is a garden full of bastard fruits and also basil
a day out at the park https://buff.ly/2QYsYTq https://ift.tt/2LjZwSI
hey not to be absolutely fucking morbid on main or anything but if we do reach a point where the rich try to escape extinction by fleeing earth to live on their secret mars colony or whatever my dying moments will be taking solace in the fact that a society comprised solely of the 1% of the richest people on the planet will tear itself apart in under a year
can’t wait for Fyre Fest 2 on mars
not to be overly optimistic on main but without the 1% we might stand a chance
the second someone up there needs to clean a toilet it’s over
Truth
I’m right and I should say it
Wait. How are peoples with siblings greeting eachother then?
“Hey”
“Hey”
“Hey Dork.”
“I am not a dork.”
“Yes you are. And mom wants to talk to you.”
“Whats up buttholes”
“Shut up Loser”
“Hey maaaan”
“Hey maaaaan”
Or
“Hey stoop-stoops”
“No”
“Who are you?”
“Hey shithead”
“Hey dickface”
“Whaddup slut”
*Hey ‘name of sibling’* *Get out of my room*
“Hey nerd” “What do you want”
“Sup bitch”
“Fuck off”
*steps into the room and stares at them until they notice and stare back for a solid 15 seconds, neither of you move a muscle*
“what”
“what do you want for dinner”
That last one!!!
(Steps into the room and stares at them until they notice you and stare back)
“What”
(Leaves the room without saying anything)
“Hey penis”
“THAT’S NOT MY NAME AND YOU KNOW IT”
“Hi seestraaa”
Sister: Sup Homo I: Cowabunga Dude
Neuschwanstein Germany | More
7 depression tips and why they work, from someone who’s been hardcore depressed for two years
hi so im recovering from a really mean depression and there are some things i learned and that i would like to tell you.
1. you need to reappropriate your space and time. depression is lying to you and generally shrinks your living space (aka: you spend your time in bed/behind your computer/in your room…). visit and do something (even if its just scrolling down social media) in each room you have access to. expand your perception and space, you’ll breathe more easily.
2. plan depression outfits. a depression outfit is a comfy one you still can go out in. to me, it’s old ripped jeans and a turtleneck, my old work uniforms, sweaters. dressing up is one of the most important parts of managing depression. first of all, you’ll feel less like pathetic with proper clothes on (nothing worse than staying in your pj all day). secondly, and it’s a crucial point: it allows you to get out to run some errands. imagine you have to go grocery shopping or to the post office. if you’re in your unwashed pajamas you’ve been wearing for three days or more (been there done that) what you have to do is to undress, shower (if you can), and put on real, clean clothes. which is three things. depression messes wih one’s ability to start things, so it’s very likely you’ll drop your errands and just stay at home feeling like shit. but if you’re already wearing clothes, you just have to put on a coat and get out of the house. which is, trust me, 10 times easier than doing the whole dressing up thing.
3. it’s okay if you stay the whole day in bed but force yourself to get up in the morning (anytime before noon) and drink a glass of water/juice. again, depression messes up with your ability to start doing things, but if you concentrate your will to just get up and drink something before going back to bed, i promise you’ll feel less shitty and might actually end up getting up for good since you’ve been through the trouble of getting up. You’ll feel better (and also you need water!)
4. do one (1) physical, material thing that will improve your life conditions per day. aka: washing a single glass, scrubbing the mirror, etc. you’ll feel proud of yourself, and the tidiest your environment, the less shitty your brain will be. plus, again: if you manage to wash a single dish, maybe you’ll find yourself cleaning the whole kitchen without noticing. and thats a good thing. no pressure: just do one single thing. and don’t beat yourself up if you can’t, of course, but try, it’s gonna be better that way.
5. open the window (especially at night, i personally find it very soothing) and just… breathe fresh air, looking at the horizon or closing your eyes, and breathe in and out slowly. it’s great to take fresh air. bonus if you have anxiety/ptsd, honestly. opening the windows is one of the easiest ways i know to stop a panic attack.
6. brush your teeth everyday, even if it’s the only thing you manage to do. i know every depression guide recommends it, but it’s really important. not showering for a few days is okay, you’re not gonna get sick that way. but dental hygiene is capital. not to mention you’ll feel less rotting in the inside if you’re less rotting in the outside. you can use your phone to schedule your teeth brushing of the day! really helps.
7. think about your hobbies and force yourself to do something related to an old hobby of yours. i know it’s no fun. i know you can’t feel anything, so why bother? but really, do bother. do it and eventually as you recover it will be fun again. you haven’t lost your passion, your goals, your motivation. it’s still there, but depression is like a blanket that covers it all. forcing yourself to still act on your hobbies (especially if those are not screen-related: books, gardening, etc.) will help digging through the depression layers to expose your will to live again. trust me on this one. i really thought i was just an apathetic mess, but actually depression was just mean. i believe in you!
and finally: hold tight and it’s gonna be okay! recovery is possible, and it’s gonna arrive sooner than you expect. energy and motivation are good things and they’re still around here waiting for you!
feel free to add your own! you’re all gonna make it i promise.
The advice about dental care is really important. I’ve recovered from my depression, but I still have trouble remembering to brush my teeth because I got out of the habit while I was depressed.