the office
iconic michael scott quotes.
i am not to be truffled with.
well, well, well. how the turntables.
okay, um… count me in as “who cares?”
catch ya on the flippity flip!
don’t ever, for any reason, do anything to anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who, or who you are with, or where you are going, or where you’ve been, ever, for any reason whatsoever.
i wouldn’t miss it for the world. but if something else came up, i would definitely not go.
do you think that smoking drugs is cool? do you think that doing alcohol is cool?
sometimes i’ll start a sentence and i don’t even know where it’s going.
i’m not gonna cry over it. i did that in the car on the way home.
this is an environment of welcoming, and you should just get the hell out of here.
bippity boppity give me the zoppity.
there’s no such thing as an appropriate joke. that’s why it’s a joke.
the only thing that could make this better is ice cream.
well, this is gonna hurt like a motherfucker.
just poopin’, you know how i be.
i’m not superstitious but i am a little stitious.
daddy’s here, and daddy’s gonna take care of you.
i am not gonna give up that easy. i’m gonna make this way harder than it needs to be.
would i rather be feared or loved? um, easy. both. i want people to be afraid of how much they love me.
what’s missing? the turtles. where are the turtles? where are the turtles? WHERE ARE THE TURTLES?!
i tried to talk to ___ and be his friend, but that is like trying to be friends with an evil snail.
i’m going through a bit of a rough patch. whole year, actually.
i don’t hate it. i just don’t like it at all. and it’s terrible.
i’m an adult. i don’t have to think or do anything.
halloween should be a day in which we honor monsters and not be mad at each other.
can i just say that, of all the idiots, in all the idiot villages, in all the idiot worlds, you stand alone, my friend.
i am running away from my responsibilities. and it feels good.
you know, what eats a lot of the day are naps. you go to sleep, it’s lights out. you wake up, it’s dark. that’s the whole day. where did that day go? i have no idea.
you’re the worst. i hate looking at your face. i wanna smash it.
i hate so much about the things that you choose to be.
the only time i set the bar low is for limbo.
if i can get them depressed, then i’ll have done my job.