a good thread

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@haetshepsut
a good thread
Look I love unconditional devotion love stories as much as the next person, but there's really something so deliciously raw about conditional devotion.
I have served you and I have loved you for decades, but I will not give up my principles for you. You cut out part of my heart and took it with you down that path that you insist on walking, but you walk it alone. Even when the bleeding, gaping hole you left in my chest kills me, I will not follow you.
me everytime one of my seemingly non-specific homoerotic text posts breaks containment
I think I'm going to remember this phrase every time I cook for the next five years
helpful stuff for when you want to fuck that old man
véritables préludes flasques (pour un chien)
Gonna tell y’all what I can hear now that I got my hearing aids
Birds! They chirp and it’s so beautiful.
Far away cow moos
My friend has this is his back yard and to say I cried is an understatement.
My best friends singing voice
Chickens: *chicken noise*
Me, sobbing:
The filter for my fish tank! Bubble bubble bubble
I sit in the bass section in band. Today I could clearly hear the flutes up at the front! They’re not great, but I can finally hear them!
The sound of walking in sand.
Soft but kinda crunchy? Very nice sound 10/10
Me playing guitar for the first time. Took the hearing aids out. Not a very good sound… yet
Tree leaves in the wind. I got a little spooked at first because it’s 1 am and I’m alone in the park but it’s a real good sound.
Bees
Let me say, it was really fucking terrifying walking past the flowering tree in my backyard and hearing zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz coming from it.
“sunlight” by Hozier
I sat in my car alone while listening to it. I knew it would be special but wow, that was a religious experience.
Their hooves make sounds in the grass but they are completely silent. Beautiful creatures. Beautiful sound
Pine needles and pine cones make crunchy sounds!!! Oh my! Very nice
Colored pencils make a real nice scratch noise when I’m drawing. I didn’t know they did that
I forgot to add this is the beginning! But that little sniffing noise that dogs make when they’re smelling the air or the ground? Wonderful!
OCEAN!!!!!!
So there was just an entire booth full of wind chimes for sale at mountain fair. It started to get a little windy and they all went off at once. It was so pretty.
Joy and whimsy detected! This post is joyful and whimsical!
I actually do think we should discourage women from becoming housewives. Do not become financially dependent on a man. That's how a lot of women ended up dead over the years. A man gets violent suddenly and you have to choose between homelessness or potentially dying at his hand because you have an enormous gap in your resume and no degrees or certifications or anything that will help you pursue a career that will allow you to be financially independent. He owns your bank account. His name is probably the one on the car. Try and leave and he can report it stolen. Where will you go then?
Don't become a housewife.
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Hi! Welcome! 👋
You're about to read John Rich & The Big Picture, a very funny story about a very anxious man hurtling towards his soulmate at 200 mph.
At 28, John Rich is the youngest cover artist in the illustrious history of The New York Review. This means, every week, he draws a portrait of some notable person and this portrait becomes the cover of this very prestigious magazine. But when John is tasked with drawing the supposedly vapid (and obviously gorgeous) action movie star, Tyler Hughes, he discovers that Tyler is the one person he cannot draw.
Updates weekly.
✏️ start reading >> here ✏️ latest chapter >> here
You can also read the story online here: okjohnrich.site ✏️
FAQ under the cut. ⬇️
read this webnovel at okjohnrich.site because there's a 100% chance you're gonna love it, wish you had started it sooner, and re-read the chapters because you laughed so hard.
Heated rivalry shouldve been about 2 ugly old guys that play mahjong then maybe id consider watching it
i don't remember them playing mahjong but they do other old man things like going to the wet market together and drinking soup and taking walks. anyway go watch suk suk / twilight's kiss
"ok but where's the old chinese lesbians" go watch all shall be well. it's by the same director and the old chinese lesbians are also at the market
scientists are experimenting on cross-breeding a crab and a cheetah; things could go sideways real fast
I am deleting this app off my phone
some california wildflowers!
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not god’s strongest soldier, not god’s weakest soldier but a secret third thing
conscientious objector
You're secretly one of the funniest guys I know. Well, that secret, you don't have to keep.
I hate when king arthur has all these fussy little steps in the instructions and you're like "no way do these fussy little steps matter" but you try it and they do. they matter so much.
I thought you meant Camelot quests and I was like "that's fair, 'never pick a four leaf clover on the last Wednesday of the month' IS a fussy little step that shouldn't matter" but then I was like "wait isn't that also a flour company"
nooo I am not a beleaguered knight of the round table I am making elaborate focaccia 😭
do you think bowser ever gets anxious after kidnapping peach again that he went too far this time and he calls mario up in the middle of the night to make sure they’re still on for tennis and gokarting next weekend
painstakingly dialing mario’s landline on a comically small telephone only for luigi to pick up instead and he has to ask him to put his brother on the phone. not that luigi isn’t part of weekend plans, but like this is really more of a mario & bowser situation and it’d be rude to drag his brother into it if there’s a problem. so anyway then luigi puts the receiver down to go get his brother and bowser sits there tapping his claws on his table and this is agony, actually, he shouldn’t have called at all, it’s late enough at his castle so it has to be even later over in the mushroom kingdom. but just as he’s about to put the phone down, mario answers all chipper—mario mario speaking, who’s-a calling? which is a ridiculous question because there’s no way luigi didn’t already tell him.—and bowser has to ask him. look, mario, i know i dangled peach in a bird cage over a pit of lava the other day, and when you showed up, i let my son throw giant flaming hammers at you, and there’s no hard feelings about that, right? and there’s a few seconds of silence before mario laughs and reassures him it’s all in the day’s work of a plumber, an explanation bowser has never thought to really question since he only knows two plumbers and it does all seem pretty in their wheelhouse. and then he’s embarrassed for worrying so much so he tries to end the call quickly, but mario just ribs him about how badly he’s going to lose the next race, and then he starts asking bowser how junior is, and does bowser want any of the leftovers since he and luigi really do cook way too much for two, be a shame to let it go to waste. and by the time bowser manages to hang up, this has gone from leftovers into him and junior and the koopalings all being invited over to the mario household for dinner, so long as they don’t park their airship on the front lawn and leave the cannons at home.
op approved tags. you’re the only person here who sees my vision
[ID: tags reading #I think that's just dom drop and he's just looking for reassurance they liked what he did ]