yours truly

[halfawakestilldreaming]

today i was actually close to doing it. to ending it. the only thing that held me back was a knock on the door. a sign. not today.

[halfawakestilldreaming]

underneath the only given metaphorical star, sun and moon above groups of rhythmic movements along to its music. magic.

[halfawakestilldreaming]

[halfawakestilldreaming]

[halfawakestilldreaming]

depression’s been hitting pretty rough lately. i had completely forgotten this side of the feeling. it’s been a long time. i never doubted it’d come back, and then again, i think that’s why i’m feeling like this now. i’ve allowed myself. i don’t understand. i remember using this platform and exploring on here is what would help me stay grounded. it’s strange. i haven’t logged on in years and i’m now wanting to go back to being a teenager with a personal blog in secret. don’t care who sees though. i’m growing older and i’m getting more vulnerable. i’ve been worried for myself, mentally and physically. i’m afraid to go lower than i’ve been before. all honesty. i’ve got a lot of love to give, and that’s what i can’t forget. no matter how little i feel all the love i receive. it’s my own mess. 

[halfawakestilldreaming]