Kit💫30s💫they/them💫 Got the ✨tism rizz✨ Handlebarstiedtothestars on Ao3 Prone to rabid hyperfixations that are subject to change with the position of the moon.
I guess since I got bitten by the radioactive ATEEZ spider and am active on here again I should do a lil intro thing about me to pin
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Hi 👋 I’m Kit! 🤓
Some tags for you:
ATEEZ reactions/thoughts/unhinged ramblings
ATEEZ metas, theories & speculation (Proudest moment: I called the Ghosts theme for this year and I will never shut up about it)
My ATEEZ fics (NSFW Minors DNI 🔞)
UPDATE April 2026 - Due to a change in healthcare plans, I’m sorry to have to put my current ongoing fic Come Take a Seat In Your Fantasy on hiatus. It is NOT abandoned, please know I am determined to continue it, but rn I cannot dedicate the energy, time or strength to do it justice, as I have much bigger IRL fish to fry. I will be back, I just don’t know when, everything is very up in the air atm, so please don’t ask me. Thanks for your ongoing support, patience and understanding <3
A bit about my lil gremlin self & my Atiny journey under the cut:
I’m in my 30s (when the fuck did that happen 🥲) so I have been here since the dawn of time (insert that “do not cite the deep magic to me witch” meme) and so I will unironically rant and be feral and unhinged in the tags and overuse italics and strikethroughs (and brackets) and em dashes - fuck ai ruining them - and tumblr text size changes and memes and gifs as if it’s still 2012 (and yes my username is an Owl City reference)
They/them or any pronouns tbh, I’m just a little human bean who is 1.5 apples tall and gender means literally nothing to me, I just don’t get it as a concept at all 🤷
My ND brain likes comfort things and hyperfixations and obsessing and spiralling and this blog verrrrry much reflects that. If I’m currently obsessed with something you’ll know about it and I make no apology for that. There are no niches or purposeful focuses on this page; here there be monsters (ie a visual manifestation of the chaos of my own mind)
Longstanding comfort media includes: The Lord of the Rings, Sherlock Holmes (Jeremy Brett version), Good Omens, Our Flag Means Death, The Good Place, Brooklyn 99, The Mandalorian, and anything Disney because I was a kiddo in the 90s renaissance (fave is Beauty and the Beast), and more recently Kpop Demon Hunters (because, being late-realised enby and late-diagnosed autistic, the queer/ND self acceptance interpretation of Rumi gives me life - “why couldn’t you love me - ALL of me?!” destroys me) and the music of obviously ATEEZ but also Hozier, Chappell Roan, Fleetwood Mac, Aurora and Ren, and I will happily rave about any of these until I turn blue
Speaking of which:
Hello to my fellow Atiny! 🫶
You’re all so kind and wonderful and feral and I love you for it!!! I have only been here since a few weeks before the Roar MV dropped, it has been a rollercoaster!! I've not yet dipped my toe into the rest of the world of Kpop, with my hectic life I currently only have the brain space for ATEEZ (plus HJ said not to look at other oppas and I refuse to upset another father figure in my life hehet)
In terms of my bias journey: I’m Topaz biased, but I have also admitted OT8 defeat!! Here’s my post about how it happened 🫠
To see more of my ramblings about ATEEZ there’s the links at the top!
So that’s a slice of me! Nice to officially meet you 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶
sure must be nice to be in a polycule. imagine having two hot sexy older partners - one who calls you baby kitten, treats you to good food, smells absolutely divine, and another who allows you to be an absolute brat, would dom you or allow you to bite him whatever you’re in the mood for
4 other partners of the same age - two of them who absolutely tower over you make you feel extra babygirl whenever you’re near them, one who is the absolute dreamiest gentleman who would do anything you asked, one who is sculpted like a greek statue and able to let his walls down with you almost exclusively
last but not least a cute younger partner who has superhuman strength able to carry and toss you around like you weigh nothing, amazing sense of humour and will meet your level of sass
So I usually throw these thoughts at my pocket friends and make them feel things.
I had this thought and well decided it needs to be shared to you all.
So we know Hongjoong has had this cough for a while and we know that he fractured a rib because of it.
We also know he doesn't like us to worry about him, that he will play it off and say he is fine. We know this.
We also know he doesn't like to worry his members.
So what if he had been hiding just how bad it really was to them too. Because "It can't have been as bad as that time Seonghwa fractured his rib and Yunho's migraines were worse and Jongho was in so much more pain than me with his knee. This is manageable."
I can imagine him waving it off as just a silly cough. He would push through and only when he was alone, would he crumple. Only when he know everyone else is ok, would he allow himself to feel the hurt in his body, and even then he would still try to push through, to work through it.
Until he couldn't. Until someone (one of the boys) catches the mask slipping off and (gently) confronts him about it. But what if that wasn't for weeks. What if he chose to deal with it alone. Because, again, we know he doesn't like to worry others.
And he doesn't want to stop. He wants to keep moving forward because he has dreams and he knows soon there is going to be a time where he won't be able to chase them like he'd like. So he is trying to squeeze so much out of himself.
The fact he sat on the edge of the chair in Istanbul shows that he is willing to try (even if it is for a moment).
🐿️ Honestly, I admit it. I actually made my plans for this year really tightly packed, and even though we're going to be together forever and ever, there might come a moment when I have no choice but to take a break as an artist, even if just for a little while. So yeah, it's true that I've been impatient, or at least I might have been. That's why I have this feeling of not wanting to miss out on anything if I can help it, and also this desire to do even more of everything, so I scheduled things pretty densely—and that's on me, so I'd appreciate it if you could understand that.
In all sorts of ways, when the atmosphere is good, I just wanted to see everyone looking happy. So that's why it was like that. I get that our TINYS are worried about me, so I hope our TINYS can understand my feelings well too.
Five years ago, when I first met San, I told him, "You really look like a fashion person."
Back then, 22 year old San, who had come up from Namhae, was much thinner and more innocent and unassuming than he is now. He worked incredibly hard more than anyone else to train his lean physique, gradually turning it into a strength of his own. Even then, just like now, he was someone who put a lot of effort into whatever he did.
After that, I saw San from time to time. With each new album, he changed little by little, and at some point, I became more accustomed to seeing the face of a man than that of a boy. His physique, his expressions, and even the way he presented himself onstage had changed.
Along the way, he met Dolce & Gabbana. The response was enthusiastic from the very first show he attended. Honestly, it wasn't all that surprising. Just as I'd said when I first met him, San was someone with a distinct character of his own whenever he put on clothes. What I didn't know back then was that he would make it so completely his own, the way he has now.
And then, in 2026, I saw ATEEZ's 'BAD'. Suddenly, I thought of the San I'd first met. He looked quite different back then, and yet somehow, there were parts of him that hadn't changed at all. I also got to be part of San's first cover with Dolce & Gabbana, something I obviously could never have known would happen five years ago.
San, Dolce & Gabbana, Dazed Fall Edition.
For this cover, rather than focusing on San of ATEEZ, I wanted to get a little closer to Choi San, the person born in 1999.
Rather than creating yet another intense face for the stage, I wanted to see the face that has already taken shape in the person he is today.
I remember the San I first met, and now I'm looking at the San he is today.
People are always changing, and San will take on yet another face in the years ahead. When we meet again a few years from now, he may be a completely different person from who he is today.
So this time, I wanted to preserve the San of this moment. So that even when I open this page again long after it has passed, I can recall what kind of person Choi San was in 2026.
