Song of the day: Snow Patrol - The Garden Rules
YOU ARE THE REASON
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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Sweet Seals For You, Always

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@handofthenorth
Song of the day: Snow Patrol - The Garden Rules
I'll be seeing you | Solo Para
The halls of Boreal were cold and empty, much like it usually was, but since the majority of the Salvatore's host party were currently residing in Casterly Rock the eerie feeling Jon had when he was here was greater than ever. More so now that it housed the body of his late cousin, Ruby Stark. The whole journey back to Boreal was long and painful, he was so wrapped up in his own grief that he had hardly spoken a word, not even to Faye despite being as close as they were. Even Warren could not make a smile appear on their faces. For how could they? Ruby was someone extremely close to the both of them, and now that she was gone, it was like she had taken all the reasons to laugh and smile away with her.
Jon remembered the moment quite clearly, when he had found out that she had died. The siege was over and they had taken Casterly Rock from the Lannister's, but their celebrations were short lived when they made it back to camp. He had seen her, pale and unmoving with Faye slumped over her body. Everything inside him grew cold immediately, colder even than the northern winds. It can't be... she and Faye are just playing some stupid trick. He had told himself. But when he saw the women around them looking as grim as Northerner's could possibly be he knew it to be true. His memory from then on was a blur, whether or not it was he or Damon who had rushed forward, he wasn't sure. All he could remember was briefly holding her lifeless body before she was taken from him.
Jon thought he couldn't feel worse, not until a raven had arrived with the news of his friend held captive in the South. Jon could barely keep himself together long enough before he had broken down away from the eyes of their men. Ruby, and now Daniel too. There was one thing to be sure, none of them were no longer children now. If they were children, the ones he loved wouldn't be dying around him. He wouldn't be outliving the ones that once looked up to him when they were younger. He could only remember sobbing, with only the comfort of the trees to shield him from the eyes of others.
Ruby, the one he would always be competitive with without fail, his relationship he had with Robb was one thing, but with Ruby he knew he would always have someone that would just listen. Someone he had grown to care about more than he had ever intended. And Daniel who Jon had grown close to because of the one simple fact that they were treated the same way. Who Jon had grown to see as his own younger brother, who he was looking forward to seeing again when the war was over and the Lannister-Baratheon/Mikaelson alliance was defeated. And now because of this war, because of the South, he would never see either of them again. Never see them smile, or hear them laugh, he would never find comfort in their arms again. They would join their family of days past, and he along with Robb, Faye and everyone else they had left behind to mourn them.
Now here they were, in the halls of their closest friends, and all he could think about was the grief stricken face she had after he had kissed Ruby. He never explained himself, he never spoke to her again after that, he never told her how he felt. And now he never would. The sound of her voice was just a whisper in the wind now, her smile a fading memory. Jon stepped up to the platform that held her body, the paleness of her skin looked like that of just another Northern woman so she could pass as being asleep. And she was, she just wasn't going to wake again.
He stared down at her, brushing the back of his hand against her frozen face. Soon she would join the Salvatore's of old down in the crypts, but only for now. When they took back Winterfell she would be moved again, to be with her family. "I have not forgotten my promise to you, cousin." He muttered quietly, staring down at her. "Once we avenge Daniel's death and rid the lands of the Lannister's filth, we will drive the kraken's back into the sea, and you will return home once again." Jon took a deep breath as tears began to bridge in his eyes again, knowing that this would be the last time he laid his eyes on her.
"I'm going to find him for you, Ruby." He promised, turning his hand over so that he was caressing her cold cheek with his thumb. "I'll find your father... I'll bring him back to you and we're going to take back our home." He was trembling now, not bothering to wipe away his tears as they tumbled down his cheeks. "I'll see their heads on a pike... just like you said." He sobbed, sniffing and swallowing back the lump that had formed in his throat. Jon's face twisted up in pain as he leaned forward and pressed his lips upon her forehead, his face streaked with tears now, "Goodbye cousin." And with that he pulled back his gaze resting on hers one last time before he turned and walked away from her, his face red and wet with tears. Jon wouldn't be returning here anytime soon. Not until he had found Benjen Stark, not until they had taken back Winterfell together. It was what Ruby had wanted, and he would see it done.
Northern Wind | Jon&Katherine
I will do my best to whip him into shape. After all, a woman has ways. [smirks a bit before her expression softens as he speaks] Of course. [nods, offering him a reassuring smile] We all want to do those things. [reaches out and tentatively places a hand on his shoulder] If there is anything I can do… Please let me know. I want to help in whatever way I can. [pulls her hand back and lets it fall to her side, brushing against his as they walk for a moment before she clasps her fingers together behind her back]
Of that I have no doubt. [chuckles lightly and smiles appreciatively and the gesture of comfort she was giving him, nodding his head in thanks] That is much appreciated my lady, but I hope it does not have to come to that. We can't risk putting your life in danger either now can we? [says with a smile as they walk together through the night]
Northern Wind | Jon&Katherine
Katherine noticed the way his expression dropped, and she was quick to recover when she realized why. “I only meant that… Well, pardon my language, but the King shits and the Hand wipes. Not the…” She fell quiet, genuinely feeling sorry for having not made herself clear before. She hadn’t meant to remind Jon of his father’s murder. She was glad he did not seem too affected by it, though that was probably a facade he put on for her. Katherine herself was not close with her father, but she knew it was different with the Starks. They must have still missed Lord Stark terribly. “Well, if he gives you too hard of a time, let me know. I could ask him to be kinder to his brother,” she smiled, confident that when she confronted Robb about his sleeping with Faye in due time that she would have him wrapped around her finger. “Such as what, if I may ask?” she asked, a brow arching curiously.
[gives her a small smile and waves her off] I know what you meant, my Lady. Do not fret. [looks at her fondly before his expression finally breaks out into a grin and holds her gaze] If there's anyone that can whip my Lord brother into shape, it's you I'm sure of it. [grins before his expression turns thoughtful and shrugs slightly] Aid my brother in this war to victory, bring Joffrey and the Lannister's to justice, rescue Sansa and Lord Daniel, take back Winterfell and drive the kraken's back into the sea where they had better stay or I'll have all their heads, find Arya, Bran and Rickon... [trails off then looks at her with a small smile] To name a few...
Warrior – Beth Crowley
No Light | Jon + Robb
Robb looked up sharply at the sound of a voice behind him, but relaxed as he recognized his brother, shoulders slumping. “Gorgeous.” He said bitterly, insincerely, the word like dirt in his mouth. “Everything Faye and Lord Arryn could have asked for, I’m sure. We are somewhat of experts at unwanted weddings around here.” It was too bold of him to say out loud, here, but everyone was within the Feast still and Robb simply didn’t care. He was tired of not saying anything. Of pretending to be pleased, all for the sake of a people who demanded too much from him.
He looked over at Jon, forlorn. “I wanted to punch him in the face the whole time, Jon.” He admitted, knowing his brother would know who he meant. Normally Robb would be less forthcoming, but drink and despair had loosened his tongue. “How am I supposed to be allies with that man now?”
Jon laughed dryly at his offhanded comment and patted his brother on the back in what he hoped was a comforting gesture as he came to stand beside him. The smile that he had donned the entire day long gone as he watched the range of emotions flit across his brother's face. "I think you know as well as I do that this is nothing like what Faye would have asked for." He sighed, glad for the fact that everyone was still inside enjoying the feast. Jon hadn't had a drop of wine yet, but he knew as soon as he walked back inside, the wine table would be the first place he headed. His gaze drifted back to Robb when he spoke again, wondering if Robb's face would be perpetually frowning now.
"I know you did, Robb. Your knuckles were positively white the entire ceremony." He said light-heartedly, hoping to cheer his brother up some with a joke, though he knew there wasn't a way for him to cheer him up on a day like this. Not unless he could deliver Faye to his tent on a silver platter, though, as much as he loved the both of them, would be something he never did ever. Jon scratched the back of his head and smoothed his hair out as he let out a lengthy sigh,
"You will because you must, Robb. I know you both love each other, and... you know I would have loved to have seen you both together in the end... but you're both married now. To different people. I know it's the last thing you want to hear right now but, both your paths lead elsewhere now. Hers with Lord Arryn, and yours with Lady Katherine. You're King now, brother... it's your duty." Jon hated speaking to his brother like that, he knew Robb already knew everything he was telling him, but sometimes people just needed reminding in times of need.
eyes on fire | jon&damon | wedding
[a voice in the back of his head was telling him to be rational, to be reasonal. but all he could remember was Ruby’s words echoing through his mind and he snapped] Don’t act like you don’t know. [scowls as he shoves him in the chest and punches him again, ignoring the hollering of people around him]
[Can feel the taste of blood in his mouth and that makes him even more angry. Should probably be calm about the situation, should probably calm down, take Jon outside and calmly discuss matters, but instead he returns the punch, totally oblivious that a crowd is forming and that this is a very unlordly thing to do] I’m afraid you’re going to have to spell it out for me, Lord Snow
[can see the punch coming but oddly finds himself wanting to be hit. he reels back when Damon's fist connects with his jaw and rubs it some before leveling the Salvatore with a harsh glare] You know what you did... [scowls at Damon calling him Lord Snow, knowing full well he hated it and runs at him, tackling him to the ground and socks him in the jaw again, raising his fist to punch him again]
“It’s very bad manners to spy on a Lady, Jon.”
“Forgive me, my Lady. I was just—”
“Don’t worry. It’s not spying if it’s welcomed. And it is.”
Northern Wind | Jon&Katherine
“That it is,” Katherine responded, a light chuckle leaving her lips. She peered up at the sky, her eyes fixing upon the moon absentmindedly as thoughts ran through her mind. Thoughts about her marriage, the war, life. How everything was changing each day. This was not the life she had pictured having, but she was making the best of it. And soon, it would all be worth it. When Jon spoke again, she turned her head to look at him, her gaze momentarily drifting to admire his lips as they moved. “Well, you know what they say about the Hand,” she giggled, lips spreading into a teasing smile. “But you seem to be handling it well. You are still alive, after all.”
The expression on his face faltered a little at her comment. Jon knew very well what they said about the Hand. They never lasted. His own father was proof of that. Jon didn't want to dwell on the fact that his father was beheaded at the request of a child that knew nothing of what he was doing, nor did he want to dwell on the fact that he might never find out who his mother is since the knowledge well likely died along with Ned Stark. At the expression on Katherine's face though, he knew that that was not what she meant, so instead of bringing her down as well, he smiled and nodded. "That I do." He said with a small chuckle, "Though I'm glad to admit that my brother hasn't made too big of a mess for me to clean up." He grinned and added as an afterthought, "...yet." Jon chuckled, the smile on his face growing somewhat shy at her appraisal. "Well... that is because I'm not too fond of dying just yet... there's much left to do yet."
Northern Wind | Jon&Katherine
Katherine could not tear her eyes away from Jon’s smile. It was always friendly, pure. Genuine. And not to mention, rather handsome. A part of her wished that this was the man she was marrying, that Jon was a legitimate Stark man, the King in the North. Though she did not know him well, she had this feeling he would never do what Robb did. ”Of course not,” she shook her head, motioning for him to follow as she began walking again, this time at a slower pace. “No better time to get to know each other better than a walk in the middle of the night,” she smirked slightly. She hadn’t forgotten their plans to know one another, and up until now, there hadn’t been any opportunities for them to do so without having eyes on them. And Katherine would prefer nobody watch. ”So tell me, Jon. What is on your mind? There has to be something. One does not go for a walk alone at this time if there isn’t.”
Without hesitation, Jon fell into step beside her, clasping his hands behind his back as they walked together with only the moonlight to guide them. It was a strange feeling, but despite the fact that they were otherwise strangers to each other, Jon couldn't help but feel quite comfortable in her presence. He welcomed the feeling. With her at least she didn't have some sort of expectation with him. They were perfect strangers, knowledge of each other would build later. "The truth is always easier in the dead of the night." He said with a short laugh, his gaze drifting from hers to the path laid before them. It was extremely late so the only people that continued to hang about were the sentries, and even then they were half falling asleep. Jon made a mental note to bring up new guard schedules. The camp couldn't have an attack during the middle of the night because their guards had fallen asleep at their posts. His attention was brought back to Katherine when she spoke again, a short laugh leaving his lips as he shrugged, "Weddings, take overs, making sure your betrothed doesn't make any hasty decisions. I took on more than I realised when I agreed to becoming my brother's hand." He chuckled, then added as an after thought, "but I do not regret it."
eyes on fire | jon&damon | wedding
[tosses back yet another glass of wine easily as he looks around the wedding feast gloomily. he hadn’t seen Ruby since she had left him earlier, and he wasn’t sure whether he was relieved or disappointed because of it. either way when he felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see none other than the last person he wanted to see in that moment, he could practically see red cover his vision] You’ve got some nerve! [scowls as he stands and spins around quickly, his arm following as he punches Damon square in the jaw, barely registering the fact that they were still at the feast and everyone could see him]
[His sisters wedding, he never thought he’d see the day. At least not like this. He had broken his promise and wed her to a stranger all for a few men in a war. His sister was worth more than that. But he thought it would protect her, or perhaps he was just too angry to care. He’d been unnaturally quiet during the wedding, he hadn’t joined in with the bawdy jokes and he hadn’t even teased Stefan, he’d been avoiding everyone, Ruby, Robb, Faye, all the people he’d loved so much. That was what likely drew him to Jon, some sort of reach for friendship] Snow [Clasps his hand on his shoulder, smiling for the first time this evening but it’s quickly wiped off his face when Jon turns and punches him. Stumbled backwards, clutching his jaw, his anger flaring] What do you think you’re doing?
[a voice in the back of his head was telling him to be rational, to be reasonal. but all he could remember was Ruby's words echoing through his mind and he snapped] Don't act like you don't know. [scowls as he shoves him in the chest and punches him again, ignoring the hollering of people around him]
No Light | Jon + Robb
It was done. Faye’s wedding. And Robb felt utterly hollow, like less than a person. All throughout the ceremony he’d sat by Katherine’s side, his heart aching as physically as if someone had stabbed him through, but now…he was empty. He could not feel anymore. Or at least, he didn’t want to. He was sure Katherine had realized he was distressed - he’d drunk at least a full jug of wine by himself within the first hour of the feast - but he found he did not care if she discovered why. Robb knew he should be more careful. But how could he stand on this world and try when it felt as though it was all being ripped away from him?
In any case, his wife had not confronted him about his sullen behavior, and instead he’d excused himself from the feast early. As if he could bring himself to participate in the bedding ceremony. He would not, despite the disapproval he may have incurred from his mother and certainly from Damon. He walked out into the snow, drink making his limbs heavy, seeking some cool hideaway from all of the chaos inside the feast.
The stars settled heavy over his head, looking dimmer than he remembered. Gods, he hated himself. He hated himself and the Vale, Lord Arryn, Damon even - anyone he could blame for this. But not Faye. How much easier would it be if he hated Faye? Robb scowled deeply, and shook his head.
The whole ceremony Jon had forced a smile on his face, he had to after all. How else was he supposed to smile when he knew how much both his brother and his closest friend were hurting no matter how big they tried to smile. They could hide their feelings from everyone else, but certainly not the boy they had grown up alongside. Their smiles did not fool him and he could not fool himself. In his mind he knew that Lord Warren was probably a great man, but he couldn't bring himself to like him. Not yet at least.
As often as he could, Jon watched Robb from afar. He was, if anything, completely emotionless. Some would count that as the attitude of a King, but others knew better, and the first moment that he could, Jon followed the King in the North out into the cold weather, pulling his cloak close around him as he found his brother standing alone in the middle of the camp.
"Robb..." He says to alert him and moves to stand beside him, his gaze searching his brothers, "Some ceremony, eh?" He says awkwardly, knowing to ask him how he was would be a redundant question. He knew how he felt. Probably a million times worse than how he felt at his own wedding most likely.
eyes on fire | jon&damon | wedding
[tosses back yet another glass of wine easily as he looks around the wedding feast gloomily. he hadn't seen Ruby since she had left him earlier, and he wasn't sure whether he was relieved or disappointed because of it. either way when he felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see none other than the last person he wanted to see in that moment, he could practically see red cover his vision] You've got some nerve! [scowls as he stands and spins around quickly, his arm following as he punches Damon square in the jaw, barely registering the fact that they were still at the feast and everyone could see him]
A Feast for Wolves | Ruby and Jon | Wedding
You’ve nothing to ap-… [he begins, cutting himself off when she tells him the truth and looks away sharply as he purses his lips tight and stands abruptly. not liking the mixed feeling of irrational anger towards a certain Salvatore and the feeling of someone clawing away at his heart] I won’t speak of this to anyone. [he said shortly, unsure whether he meant her and Damon or them. probably both]
[feels her face warm up and tears gather in the corner of her eyes as he pulls away from her and stands] Jon, please. [stands with him, her hand hesitating for a moment before she decides against trying to calm him down] I’m so sorry Jon. I’m so so sorry. [turns quickly, feeling the tears run down her face as she makes her way back to the tents]
[takes deep breaths in an attempt to calm himself, shutting his eyes tight as he counts backwards from ten in his mind, barely registering her words or the sound of her retreating from him. only opening his eyes when he's reached zero and looks towards where she had disappeared, his eyes red rimmed and glassy before he blinks them away and walks off in the opposite direction, most likely in search of the next barrel of ale]
A Feast for Wolves | Ruby and Jon | Wedding
[bites his lip and closes his eyes when she kisses his cheek, swallowing thickly as he slowly opens his eyes and turns to face her with a feigned smile] Though the feeling’s not returned all the time is it?
I’m sorry… [frowns some more and looks away, ashamed] I truly am sorry. I don’t want to lead you on. It’s… [closes her eyes] Please don’t tell Faye. Or Stefan. Please. [looks over to him, pleading] I gave my maidenhood to Damon.
You've nothing to ap-... [he begins, cutting himself off when she tells him the truth and looks away sharply as he purses his lips tight and stands abruptly. not liking the mixed feeling of irrational anger towards a certain Salvatore and the feeling of someone clawing away at his heart] I won't speak of this to anyone. [he said shortly, unsure whether he meant her and Damon or them. probably both]
A Feast for Wolves | Ruby and Jon | Wedding
[closes his eyes and continues avoiding her gaze, his breath catching in his throat again when he feels her hand on his arm] You’ve no need to apologise, Ruby. [finally opens his eyes and looks back at her with a forced smile] I was… I don’t… [trails off not knowing how to finish that and averts his gaze again with a sigh]
[sighs and leans in, kissing his cheek gently] It’s okay. [smiles, trying to regain their usual teasing] I’m very beautiful and everyone wants me. I do not blame you for it.
[bites his lip and closes his eyes when she kisses his cheek, swallowing thickly as he slowly opens his eyes and turns to face her with a feigned smile] Though the feeling's not returned all the time is it?
He was who he was; Jon Snow, bastard and oathbreaker, motherless, friendless, and damned.