Diy doesn't have to be Make A New Jacket From Scratch btw, it can be turning Jacket You Don't Wear into Jacket You DO Wear by adding a simple patch, adding a cool charm to your zipper, or dying it a new color! :) diy is about doing whatever you can do, with what you have, however you feel comfortable.
Don't psyche yourself out of a good thing! It takes time and practice but you can Get There!! what the practiced diy-ers with all the coolest projects don't tell you is they were beginners too once upon a time!
Can I please have something soft and sweet with the Lamenters? They're all good boys, and deserve some good luck for once. And a few smooches, some flowers, and a long hug. Maybe them being thanked for saving some people?
Author's note: hehe, i love me some sad yellow boyz. Apologies for being so slow. Tbh it probably won't change much, I'm currently dealing with my mother's undiagnosed mood disorder worsening, and trying to work as many hours I can to save enough money to move out. I write what I can in between things, but tbh most days I'm so exhausted I just sit at my computer and watch someone play games. Anyways, cute Lamenters <3
Relationships: Unnamed Lamenter/Fem!Reader
Warnings: none
You hadn't realized how tightly you had been holding on until you saw the straining of your knuckles; Only when you loosened a tad did your skin return to it's usual color. The bright yellow of this armor plating is in stark contrast to your own clothing, and quite cold to boot.
But in the wake of almost everything being burnt to ash around you, this might as well be your floating debris in a vast sea. It's the only hint of familiarity, even if only by a few moments. The surrounding area is completely unfamiliar now, just ash and rubble and corpses.
"We will be returning to our battlebarge now. You and any other survivors will stay until we pass a suitable imperial planet."
You understand what he's saying, but it feels like the words don't stick, and instead bounce right off.
"Do you understand me?"
Suddenly you tense up a bit, remnants of ash still burn your nose.
"Yes."
The metallic twinge of his voice going through the helmet gives his chuckle an odd echo.
"Good. I was beginning to wonder."
The crook of his elbow pinches your backside a bit, as you sit cradled on it while his hand supports the back of your knees. It's somewhat comfortable, and leaves him with his other arm open to hold his bolter.
"if I had a brain between my ears still?"
He chuckles a bit again. His voice sounds very monotone and stoic, even his laugh is very reserved.
"Perhaps."
You see a few others like him, massive suits of yellow armor ushering other humans like you along in the same general direction. Out of an uncountable amount of people, only a handful seem to have survived.
You are grateful to be alive, but it is hard to articulate when it seems not much else also lived.
"Brother," Another wearing identical armor to who is holding you comes closer, pointing in the direction of a different group. "You can leave her with the others."
It would be reasonable to drop you there, but for some reason he refuses.
"No, it is fine. It's not as if she is a strain to hold."
The other one nods and walks away, and you both continue in the general direction of their assumed to be dropship. You could walk, your legs felt mostly fine, but you can't say you didn't greatly appreciate not having to. Your body ached and your head felt light, you didn't think you would be able to keep any reasonable pace let alone with someone so much taller than you.
"Thank you, I don't know if I could keep up with you if I walked. I would get left behind."
His voice is still monotone, but now firm.
"I would not leave you behind so easily."
You smile at him and thank him again, though the helmet gives no warmth and expression in return. Instead you brush off a bit of ash from the right lens of his helmet. It feels so inhuman, his armor leaves not one tiniest area exposed. You would be so much more terrified of something that ripped through your city like it was nothing, even if it was to fight something worse, but your body has since run out of adrenaline to pump through you and your body simply fawns.
His voice does sound a bit more warm and reassuring this time he speaks however, and along with the sounds of the other survivors speaking as you approach them and the loading ramp of this massive dropship you feel marginally better.
I still canโt stop thinking about the Primarchs with the perpetual soulmate who shares pain.
I would love to see what would happen if they actually do get to meet.
Like I suggested earlier, when the Khan gets to Commorragh, he realizes you are here. He can see you with his own eyes. Each blow against your skin perfectly matches the flares of pain. Jaghatai wonders if you have been here all this time.
And if we want to be nice to them, we can have them manage to escape Commorragh together (neither could have escaped on their own, but by working together they succeeded.) So Jaghatai gets to show his soulmate all the nice things.
I donโt think I need to suggest the bad ending, hehe.
Russ might be similar. Heโs running around in the Warp, I think. Itโs a big place, but one day he runs across his soulmate, trapped in the Warp. Reason enough to grab them and find his way out? Maybe?
Konrad is dead, but there has been suggestions in the past that something of him survived in his crown (just because itโs not been referenced lately doesnโt mean itโs not possible.) or blame Fabius Bile or something. (I have made jokes about Trazyn wanting to bring Curzeโs head back to life so he has his own portable prophet to carry around. Sky is the limit. Not like anyone knows what became of Konradโs head.)
Sanguinius, I believe I read at some point that a part of him is trapped on the Vengeful Spirit, reliving his death.
Ooh, since itโs Abaddonโs flagship, one day Sanguinius might realize they have brought his soulmate on board. Time to try to break the cycle now youโre both here.
And so on for all of them?
(Iโm making the assumption here that itโs being in the same place at last that makes it possible to change things. And potentially get a decent fate out of all the suffering)
Primarchs finding their soulmate in a shared pain AU
For context you can find Part 1 here but it also can be read independently! Again there is some angst here like in the first part. Nothing too graphic but be aware. Feeling evil today so youโre gonna get a mixture of comfort and delicious angst.
Fulgrim
Fulgrim never liked being on mining worlds. Too much dirt and dust swirled in the air, the smells were awful and the faces of the workers always full of misery. It reminded him of home. But unlike Chemos, no hand of beauty would touch this planet. Nothing would change because the Imperium needed the resources.
His cough has risen up again and since all tests came out negative Fulgrim knew it was the pain of his soulmate again. At this rate he might as well throw himself down a mine and get over with his own suffering. So far no symptoms appeared during a battle but with how often he started to feel the pain it would inevitably intervene with is duty. It was as irritating as it was frustrating because it was the only thing in his life he could neither influence nor control. His sons hovered around, a cloud of dust swirled by and his mood soured. Did his own sons think him weak? He adjusted his pace, making his sons fall back. The last thing he needed was for them to see another coughing fit.
โThis planet is really getting on my nerves. I can wait for the moment we leave this miserable rock.โ
He stopped short of a few workers, observing the small group. One was kneeling, coughing up blood from damaged lungs while others tried to get them to their feet before the screaming overseer would come down. Yes, it felt like home. This time though each cough mimicked the uncomfortable ache in his own chest. โCould it really be them?โ
Stepping forward the workers parted and the overseer stopped screaming for the crowd to get going. Everyone watched frozen as he picked up your frail body. For a small moment he increased the pressure around your ribcage and he felt the pain instantly flare up in him before he soothingly brushed over it with his thumb.
โI believe we are going to prolong our stay on this world.โ he said not looking at the son that came after him but rather at the coughing figure in his hands. โI have finally found you.โ he said only to you.
Lion Elโ Jonson
His new ability was more than confusing. Lion neither knew where it came from, nor did he know how it worked. All he knew that it was useful. He sat meditating and tried to concentrate on it, frowning as it didnโt come to him in an instant. Still if he wanted for his plan to work, he had to do master it and tried again and again. As soon as he reached the right state of mind it became easier to continue.
โI want to go to my soulmate.โ he thought as he entered the state in which he could use his Forest Walk. Lion was not sure it would work or if you would be still alive. It had been so long since he had felt your pain. Maybe it was a mercy that you were gone even if he never got the chance to find you. Still if he could at least reach your grave it would satisfy his curiosity and give him some kind of closure that was so rare in this new era. It was a vague thought and not knowing where his soulmate was would be an obstacle but his ability was leading him somewhere and he went along with it.
It felt like walking for at least an hour before he came out in a cramped room. A desk, a closet and a mattress on which a person was sleeping. A standard room in the lower districts of the city. It was dark, buildings obscuring the sun and only the clock was an indicator that it was indeed night and not just a hive city.
Lion stood there, not daring to breathe too loud as to not risk your awakening, watching the figure till the alarm started to ring and the figure stirred to put it out with a groan. You looked up, met his gaze and froze with widened eyes like a pray animal in the forest of Caliban. A moment passed, no one moved and Lion got the feeling that perhaps he should say something instead of just staring at your face.
โAh excuse me..you must beโโ he started but was interrupted when the alarm clock was thrown his way with a shrill scream and for the first time since he woke up he felt the familiar pain coming from your hands as the clock successfully hit his head.
Perturabo
The siege had been broken and his troops and flooded the streets of the hive city. Nothing was able to withstand him or his weapons and the PlantNet would soon be another victory for Perturabo. It was nothing new and almost boring. The city walls had lasted only two days. If he had built them they wouldโve lasted forever. It spoke of poor craftsmanship of the city and it offended him to be send to such a world.
He walked down the empty streets while his warriors charged forward but now he felt pain in all of his body and he frowned in displeasure. Again his soulmate had injured themselves and he felt a pressure on his ribs and legs. It lasted a moment before it disappeared, leaving a dull ache before a sharp pain had stung his leg with every step. Couldnโt they remain whole for just one day?
At the same time a human rose from the rubble, theyโd clothes dusty and a trail of blood flowing down their head. Seeing him they limping towards a chainsword and stood across from him. He could not sense any fear from them when they lifted their weapon to attack him, only stubborn defiance that refused to be broken. They took a step forward and he felt pain shot through his whole leg and a moment of recognition passed through him and he narrowed his eyes, appraising you.
โItโs you then.โ
When he imagined his soulmate he had thought of someone else, not of a soldier who barely knew how to hold a sword right on a rebel planet. All he needed to do was to raise his gun and reduce you to red mist. But a part of him hesitated. Despite your situation you did not run from him instead you were ready to take on a leviathan of a man even if it would end in your death. A part of him wanted to be proven that you indeed belonged to his side and he lowered his arm, meeting your eyes.
โGo on then.โ he said testing your resolve to defy him.
For a moment he saw true iron in your eyes and within you and he allowed you to charge him, ready to temper the metal.
Rogal Dorn
โAm I to understanding it right? Youโre requesting me to stop using the pain glove to increase your productivity?โ Dorn said looking from the document down to you.
โYes my lord. Your usage of the pain glove pains me in turn greatly and I canโt get any work done.โ you said in the same monotone voice as him.
For months after his new invention you couldnโt work or sleep properly since every nerve ending screamed in pain every time he used the pain glove. Sure it was a great tool for his legion and maybe even for himself but he had not considered how it would reflect upon his soulmate that felt the same pain as him. It had been inefficient but getting to Rogal was harder than you thought despite him being on Terra and moving around the palace where you worked most of the days. So you did what every other reasonable human would do.
You filed some paperwork, send your request directly to him and got an appointment. Now the stoic man was looking between you and the paper, trying to reconcile your request and how you both were connected.
โI believe we are soulmates my lord and your pain is also my pain.โ you added and his body went still for a very long moment. You thought that he would see it as a bad joke at his expense and were ready to prove it to him through your own pain. Being a worker on terra was no joke after all. You needed to stay functional and his escapades needed to stop getting in your way. But only one thing went through his mind.
โI need to rectify my miscalculation.โ
โI apologize for our less than ideal meeting.โ he said what appeared to be more stiff. Through his life Rogal had gone through many scenarios how he would meet his soulmate. After all he wanted to be ready no matter what life threw at him. Now despite you coming forward first he still felt lost.
โNow that we have that out of the way..what are our plans for courting each other? โ you asked and Rogal found himself slipping back into familiar waters. Somewhere he had already planned how he wanted to court his partner. Now he just needed your approval.
Konrad Curze
โWhat an unfortunate soul you are.โ you heard his voice again in your head.
โI know.โ
It all started when you found a sharp crown while searching for resources in the depths of a hive world. You did not know where it came from since it was too well made for such a filthy place, nor who it belonged to, clearly being too big for a normal human. You wanted to sell it but then you heard his voice for the first time.
โIt must be disgusting to be the soulmate of a corpse. Did it hurt when my head was cut off?โ
And from then on he became your ghostly companion. You had not felt anything from your soulmate in years and now you knew the reason why. A fragment of a soul was trapped in his own jagged crown while his sons rampaged through the void. Could he even feel anymore? Konrad appeared before you like a shadow, looking down at you where you had laid down to sleep, holding the crown close to your chest. At least he did his name justice and haunted you nearly every night. Perhaps you were going insane or his own ability of seeing the future started to rub off on you. Why else would you be able to avoid danger like that? It was all the crowns fault.
โItโs useless to hold it so tenderly.โ he said in a grave voice and you could not help but smile softly. You got used to having him around, hearing his voice in your head and seeing him in the shadows of the night. In a cruel world he was the only constant thing.
โIf you die in your sleep your soul might get trapped alongside mine. Is that the fate you wish for?โ he tilted his head, trying to discern your motives and it was hard to reconcile him to the mad monster he told you about. His ghost settled down beside your mattress, curling up while his obsidian eyes never left your face and you held the crown even closer.
โAt least you wouldnโt be alone anymore.โ you offered and for a moment he seemed to think over your words.
โYou should go a different route tomorrow.โ he said at last before disappearing again and leaving you alone in your room.
A sigh escaped your lips. You knew it would take time till you would get through to him. At least his words stopped being so cruel after months. But perhaps being trapped with someone you were always destined to be with wasnโt the worst fate in the universe. Perhaps you would grow to like each other.
Sanguinius
โHorusโฆI need to find him..where is Horus.โ Sanguinius thought as he drifted through the endless and empty hallway, ready to meet his traitorous brother again.
But something or other someone was out of place and it tugged at his body. A dirty baseline was handling hot metal without much protection and he felt every small brunt. For a moment he forgot about his brother and the fury he felt and approached, making the human flinch in fear and back away. It was one of the crew but the uniform was different as well as the walls. Sanguinius wasnโt sure what kind of sorcery this was but the tug in his soul was unmistakable. In the midst of chaos he had found his soulmate. For a moment the anger returned and he advanced towards them with a snarl.
โWhere is Horus? Where is the master of this ship?โ he growled at the mortal which made them shuffle backwards. It didnโt matter if it was his soulmate. He would kill them too if they were a traitor.
โHorus? Thereโฆthere is no Horus. You mean Abaddon?โ you said unsure, making the angel hesitate. Did you not know who Horus was?
โAh..that means Iโmโฆโ
A sudden clarity washed over him in the presence of his soulmate. Horus wasnโt on the Vengeful Spirit anymore. The battle had been over for ten thousand years. His hand went right through you as he attempted to grab you, confirming that he had indeed been dead. The world moved on, but Sanguinius was stuck in the past, reliving his final hour over and over again. How much of it had you felt?
โI apologize for frightening you. That was not my intention..โ he said hesitant as the walls around him became more akin to the present time. โIt appears you have freed me even if I donโt know how to explain it..โ the burns on his fingers still stung but at least his words made you take a step towards him. โAll I can say itโs unfortunate that we had met this way.โ and he himself couldnโt imagine being a slave, tied to a ghost who was cursed to relive his death on a cursed ship.
โNo matter the circumstances of our meeting I will help you to escape and we will find my sons. They will accept you and you will suffer no more. I promise you that.โ Sanguinius said with sudden determination. He had broken the cycle of death that held him trapped in the past. His spirit would move forward together with you till the very end.
Roboute Guilliman
โIf only I could find youโฆI would never be alone again.โ
A Primarch returning was a grand event in a world torn by war and despair. It gave people hope to live yet another day and fight for the Imperium more vigorous than ever before. For Guilliman his awakening did him little good.
In this day and age he had no one. Everyone he knew was long dead. He shouldโve expected it, that things would not last forever. A part of him knew it ever since Konor died but he had hoped that death would creep up slowly on them all, allowing him to process one loss at a time. But now Tarasha was dead, the fate of Aeonid still unknown, his beloved brothers sharing the same fate. That was not accounting all the stress and physical pain he felt.
He kneeled down to pick up a report that had fallen from his desk but his armor barely allowed room for casual movement and he hit his head against the table, letting out a curse. In the room beside his office something fell and his knees started to suddenly hurt along with his head. He heard a furious voice scolding someone. Standing up he had allowed his curiosity to guide him. A worker who had cleaned the windows had fallen, taking the ladder and bucket with them, staining the rug. They were clutching the back of their head while an overseer was yelling at them
โItโsโฆitโs not my fault! The pain in my head..โ the crying worker started by was harshly interrupted by the overseer.
โYou already had two weeks and youโre still hadnโt gotten better! At this point itโs easier to make you a servitor. I donโt want to hear anymore complaining about pain! Am I understood!? Now clean this mess!โ with a huff the overseer stormed out, not noticing him standing in the opposite doorway. The poor worker started to pick up the bucket and sponge and he approached, grabbing the ladder and putting it upright.
โNeed a hand?โ he said allowing himself a friendly smile that he hadnโt worn in months. If that is truly who he thinks it is then he needed to give off a good first impression! It couldnโt be any harder than a simple campaign, right? He didnโt even remember the last time genuine excitement started to rise in his chest when you looked up at him.
Corvus Corax
Heretics.
It disgusted him to see Word Bearers and their servants walking around the ground and tainting the planets city. Corvus would tear them apart soon enough when they lowered their guard and would have no chance of escaping his shadow. Maybe his body would stop hurting too. It all started when he felt a searing pain at the nape of his neck and continued with pain on his legs and hands. Corvus knew his soulmate was in trouble but his search was still fruitless.
From his vantage point he could observe everyone without being noticed. Mortals were moving stones and building future temples while Astartes were herding them with whips and guns. Who of them were willing participants or forced to endure those cruelties was hard to say and while he was not fond to kill innocents it was a necessary evil in such places. Involuntary his eyes stopped on a small figure that had been pushed down by a Word Bearer to start working.
Beside a small cursed altar knelt a weeping servant on bruised knees, forced to build it up despite the sharp edges cutting into their hands and the blood making every tool slippery. If the identical pain wasnโt an indicator that it was his soulmate, the brand mark on their nape was more than enough to make it a likely possibility. A stray stone hit their shoulder and Corvus winced to himself when he felt the ache in his own bones.
He crept closer and before anyone noticed he snatched you into the shadow, putting a hand on your mouth before your scream could alert anyone. Corvus felt the struggling, the kicking of feet as he stifled you, waiting for you to loose consciousness. It was controlled and methodical but necessary even if he felt the pain himself. As soon as you stopped moving he put you into a safe dark corner, wiping away some stray tears from your face.
โI will avenge your suffering.โ
He would come back for you once he was done with his enemies and carry you away to safety, find a way to apologize for his rough treatment of you. Nevermore would you suffer by someoneโs hands.
Vulkan
โJust where could they be?โ
Two kilometers away from you and he started to feel the pain.
Vulkan could feel his feet burning while he ran along the planets surface trying to reach his soulmate first. The pain was identical, you both were on the same fiery planet and it was as if his soul started to pull him to your direction. He always dreamed about the day he would meet his soulmate and now you were so close to him.
One kilometer away from you and he started to run.
It began when people were fleeing around him and his warriors. He searched the landscape with his eyes for the source of the panic. In the distance he saw a person running along the fiery stones in a desperate bid to escape the massive beast that kept pursuing you even when you lost your shoes and the coals burned into your skin.
Five hundred meters away from you and he could see you falter.
You were in his view, the creature opened its maw to devour you as your lungs burned and your body was slowing down. Past your head flew a hammer with such ferocity that you couldโve felt the wind and the beast let out a scream behind you. Past you ran a green giant in a blur of motion, retrieving his hammer and taking a second leap at the beast while a second one suddenly picked you up like a doll and Vulkan could feel the pain recede.
For a moment he stood there, allowing you to see him in all his glory, gems glittering, armor bright and a massive hammer in hand while the beast was slayed. His soul was singing in resonance with yours and he wanted you to see him in all his might and glory.
Zero meters away from you he had taken you from the Salamander, looking over you despite the Apothecary having already checked you and making sure to avoid any injuries.
โIโm glad to have finally found you, my dear soulmate!โ he said with such affection, finally allowing his destiny to happen.
Leman Russ
โWherever you are I will find you and you will stop starving.โ
Ever since Leman entered the warp he felt a hunger no amount of food could still and a cold that could never be replaced by a fire. Every day, if you could call it a day in the warp, he felt the pain in his stomach that never left him and he froze like he never did on Fenris. In front of his crew an abandoned ship floated around and he knew it was time for yet another dangerous maneuver.
It was time to board a dead vessel that had been lost in the warp.
They have fallen so low. Now they had to scavenge upon a dead ship in the middle of nowhere. It was as undignified for the great wolves as it was necessary if he wanted to keep his comrades alive..or rather what remained of them after years and years of battle. You never knew what you could get when you entered a dead ship. Sometimes they found crew that was still alive, sometimes they found food that wasnโt yet spoiled, sometimes it were daemons and xenos that waited for them, eagerly to taste their flesh.
This time it was mostly empty. Perhaps this vessel had been lost for years. No survivors were aboard and most food had been lost. It was disappointing and he wouldโve left if not for a small beeping sound in the distance. In one of the rooms he found a still active stasis pod with a person inside of it! He felt as if an invisible hand had guided him to that room and he knew that you belonged to him.
The stasis pod hummed with depleting life and he knew that a few days more and it would give out completely and grant you a cold death with food reserves growing low and the heating system failing.
Was this fate? Did the all-father send you to him as a sign that it was enough?
Leman didnโt know if it had been fate that allowed you two to meet but he took the stasis pod with him and connected it to his own ship. Soon you would wake up and make the journey back home. He was away for long enough and besides he wanted to check how Bjorn was doing and the rest of his legions. A grad feast would do both of you good and if you got cold he would keep you warm in his arms.
โItโs time to go home.โ he thought about Fenris again.
Jaghatai Khan
Time in between fights in the arena became blurry and useless. All that mattered was death and suffering displayed like art for cruel connoisseurs.
Charging into the dark city had not been the best plan he had but the hatred had burned so bright it had blinded his reason for a moment. In the end it had cost him his freedom and doomed him to fight in the grand arena, crushing not only xenos and monsters but also innocent lives. Perhaps it had been a mercy for them to fall into the embrace of death. It must be already a century since he was captured but he couldnโt be sure about that.
What he was sure about is that his soulmate was somewhere in here. Jaghatai could fell the strangers pain of torture on his skin by the tools of the Drukhari and he felt a consistent tug on his soul ever since he got to Commorragh.
The fight was over again, the corpse of a beast was at his feet and the crowd cheered in ecstasy at the perceived suffering and he used the brief period of time in between fights to looked around. How many unfortunate souls had been turned into grotesque decoration he couldnโt tell but everything seemed to pulse with life. Some were more fortunate, gaining the favor of their masters and standing beside them like servants or worse like pets.
He felt a sudden tug at his throat that made it hard to breath for a moment and his eyes landed on a smaller figure, being dressed in finery and yet being covered in old and fresh scars. In the upper spire he could see a slave kneeling beside a throne their master was sitting on, the xeno tugging at the chain around their throat as if reprimanding an unruly pet before pulling back their head by the hair, making a cut on the collarbone of the slave and letting the blood fall into the wine goblet as if it was a delicacy. Under the meager armor he felt the same pain and he frowned. Finally he had found his poor soulmate and no doubt they felt the same pain of his wounds.
โHold on a little longer. I will figure something out.โ
Jaghatai would become better so that you would feel none of his wounds. Your eyes met for a small moment and he tried to convey that he recognized the connection. Now he had an objective that was worth fighting for. Sooner than later he would find a way to get you both out and burn this wretched place to the ground.
Magnus
โPlease do not avoid meโ he reached out telepathically again. โIโm just like you.โ
This world was hostile. Not just towards the Imperium but also to people like you and him. The medieval world was exactly what he expected and was so alike to any other. Technology wasnโt yet invented and the unknown was treated with fear and myths. People who stood out too much or had powers no one could explain were persecuted as witches and evil sorcerers. A lot of things were easy to explain but it was pointless when no one was willing to listen.
Magnus had arrived in the far city at night time and descended upon the surface with his legion. Arriving at the exact moment of a witch burning. The flames leapt up and caught the legs of the poor person on the stake, blisters were foaming and they cried out in pain. Worst of all he felt the exact same pain under his armor and a moment of recognition passed over him before he acted. Nevermind the fact that he felt every single sting if the flames he plucked you from the fires with his bare hands. It pained you more than him perhaps but Magnus couldnโt waste a moment, too afraid that if he did the flames would consume you fully.
Banning the practice of witch burning would be easy as soon as the world was conquered. Healing your wounds even easier with his Apothecaries at hand that would ease the pain. Dealing with the aftermath on his ship was far from easy.
Out of his armor he looked less intimidating but not to you. As soon as you saw him you bolted from the medical bay and ran across the whole ship with him pursuing you and trying to get you back to the apothecaries. The strange place and devices frightened you after your brush with death and the massive red giant wasnโt any comfort to you even if he saved your life.
Magnus entered the vast library where you had hidden yourself from him, making as many obstacles to your mind as you could. He rounded the corner and found you in a crevice between two bookshelves where he would not be able to reach you without deconstructing half the library.
โPlease I mean you no harm dear one.โ he said again and sat down on the floor opposite from you. For a moment he wanted to tell you about the connection he felt to you but stopped himself. You would not listen to him in that state of fear. Your mind was revolving around your injuries and the strange giants around you. โIf I call in a normal healerโฆwill you at least come out and let them see your legs? The bandages are coming undone.โ he said instead and after a moment he saw a hesitant nod from you.
It would be a long journey till he would get your trust but it was worth it for him. As long as he had you he had all the time in the universe to show you that the world was not always a place of cruelty.
Ferrus Manus
A week ago a piercing pain through his eye and skull has forced him to his knees. Now the pain was dull but constant.
โWhat are they getting into again?โ
Ferrus knew that by the pain that connected him, his soulmate was leading a harsh life. Why else would they experience constant pain? He was deep in thought when a servitor walked past him in his forge, the crippled body barely moving and as it tripped, a cable was torn out of its back, snagged by some stray equipment. Instantly he felt the same pain in his lower back and his head turned slowly to the body. It couldnโt be.
He approached the body lifting it up again and looked into the lifeless eyes that looked more like that of a corpse. It was a recent enough addition and his hands trembled as he put them back on their feet and swallowed hard. It couldnโt be them. He refused to believe it. Another cable was snatched sending searing pain through his stomach as the body collapsed in front of him.
There was no mistaking. That thing was his soulmate.
It was rare that something left him disturbed but for the first time in his life he felt a genuine bile rise from his stomach into his throat. Picking it up again was easy but this time he did not let it go.
โSpine compromised. Damage. Damage.โ it said but Ferrus ignored it in favor of his son.
โWhenโฆwhen was this one added? They werenโt around before.โ he said coldly but the calm was deceiving.
โJust last week my Lord Primarch.โ one of his sons said, who worked alongside him. โThe human had proven most competent on the battlefield and was given the honor to continue serving despite their grievous injuries.โ
A week ago. The same time he had felt the pain, nor of his but of your lobotomy that turned you into a servitor. You had been so close to him and so far at the same time. After his denial came anger and despite everything he wanted to tear apart those who robbed him of the one who was supposed to stay beside him. But all he could do was to hold you in his arms, never knowing who you were and forever loosing the chance to see who you would become.
โWhy? Is something the matter with this one Lord Priโโ
His son didnโt get to finish the sentence before Ferrus twisted the head of the servitor, ending it instantly and bowing his own head in pain. For a moment it was unbearable before it disappeared. It was the least he could do for a person he would never get the chance to love as the universe intended.
Mortarion
โWe are an unlikely pair.โ he said while you were tracing the scars around his back with your finger. He was the one who took life, you were the one who preserved it. You both could not exist on the same level and yet fate had other plans for you.
โIt doesnโt matter.โ you answered.
Most of his skin had been burned by acid and poisons by his so called โfatherโ, leaving his body a mess of pain and suffering. While he had been immortal p, he had not been invincible. Mortarion did not hide that from you. After all you were a medicae and his soulmate.
Sometimes his curiosity got the better of him and on a distant, newly discovered planet he reached out to you to test the skills and knowledge of the people. After all why not? His collection of biological weapons was ever growing through it. Dodging a check up on a demi god was a task that a lot would shy away from. You had taken a glance at him and told him to show you his wounds, treating him like you would any other patient.
โThe damage in the nerves is severe. The damage goes deeper than the skin.โ you had said and it was nothing new for him. Mortarion knew that most things were irreversible but when you had hit your arm against the table he felt the sensation on his skin. He knew you belonged to him and he belonged to you. For a long time he had been able to feel the pain of a stranger.
โI can barely feel your touch. Did your skin become just as numb as mine?โ
Now ever since he met his other half he started to feel more than just pain. Your souls had connected to each other and he felt every soft stroke that you did upon your own body, every gentle touch and he hoped that someday he would fully feel you do the same on his own body. It was as distracting as it was exciting.
โIt will take time for you to feel something again but Iโm willing to give you the sensations you want.โ you said with a small soft smile and he couldnโt deny you anything.
Angron
You were pulling at your hair again, holding your head as the pain became unbearable once more. But that was not your main concern.
You did not know who had said what but one moment you had been getting water for your refugee camp, the city burning in the distance from an assault of the supposed World Eaters and in the next you had been dragged into a thunderhawk by an Astartes without much explanation. You thought it would be the end of you. Then the pain started and you doubled over in your seat as it was stronger than usual.
You had felt pain all your life. Headaches could last days and become worse over hours but they never truly went away. At some point you got used to it, found ways to cope before your city was destroyed. After that you felt worse and no doctor could help you because there was simply nothing in your brain that would warrant such pain.
The pain subsided after minutes this time, you had landed a the Astartes unceremoniously dragged you through the corridors of the ship. The pain was slowly flaring up again but you tried to pull yourself together. And yet when you entered a room you fell to your knees, the Astartes was saying something but you could not hear it. Clearly it hadnโt been addressed to you either.
A massive man was sitting on the throne, weapon and armor tainted with dried blood while strange devices protruded from his head. It was terrifying to stand in the dim room that smelled of sweat, blood and gore before this leviathan but he made no move towards you. On the side stood an Astartes that had presented you subtly enough you could see there was a hint of hope in his eyes that was rare for superhuman soldiers. For a brief moment you dared to look up, meeting his heavy gaze and he opened his mouth for the first and last time in front of you.
โGo to the librarian. He will find a way to separate this bond.โ he said gravely and the hope in the Astartes eyes disappeared before once more you were dragged away without complaining. You never got an explanation who it was or what had connected you two.
The doors closed and Angron eyes remained upon it for a moment longer before the pain flared up again and he heard you wail in the distance. This was the right decision. It was for the best.
โYou will not take part in my suffering any longer.โ
Horus Lupercal
The rebel planet held his soulmate and he knew it. Call it a gut feeling but he had the feeling he had seen you during a skirmish, felt the pain and presence as something detonated nearby but before he managed to get you, you had disappeared between the buildings. But a Primarchs memory was good and a glimpse had been enough for him to give his soldiers a description and send them out to get you while he waited on the bridge of his ship.
He knew exactly when you were found, feeling when you were treated roughly or sustained small and insignificant injuries. Hours later a baseline was dragged in by an annoyed Abaddon who wouldโve liked to kill the resisting nuisance instead of dealing with it. With a huff he dropped you off and was dismissed from his duty.
โNo need to worry. I didnโt bring you here to kill you.โ Horus said, mistaking your lack of movement as a sign of fear. He couldnโt blame you considering you were in his presence. โWhy donโt you take a seat?โ he continued but when you still made no move to approach he rose with a sigh from his seat. โCome now. I wonโt hurt youโฆโ
But when he came closer, reaching out with his hand you pointed a pocket knife at him but even without the knife he wouldโve been dead if looks could kill.At least if he intended to kill you, you would go out defiant till the end. You saw how he raised one eyebrow and and stopped his advance. For a moment you were at a standoff, neither you nor he moved in this silent battle of wills but you didnโt back off even if his aura pressed down on you. Then he gave you a small smirk and took a step back, kneeling down to be on nearly the same eye level as you.
โVery well.โ You had won this small battle, but Horus was sure he would win the silent war.
โIf it makes it better I felt every painful touch too. We are connected after all.โ he said with a charming smile โBut letโs not get ahead of ourselves. Why donโt we get to know each other first? Starting with your beautiful name?โ
Lorgar Aurelian
โDo not run from me my angel.โ Lorgar said softly as he pursued you through the empty chapel. โYou know that we are meant to be together.โ
Planets fell like dominoes before him. Especially when they were far from the protection of the Imperium. On one of those unfortunate planets he had found his soulmate. Oh how fortunate he was that you stumbled right in front of him, scrapping your knee and making him feel the pain that had bound you together by fate.
โI have waited long enough for this!โ
The statue of his father loomed over him as he entered the main room and with the blown out candles it looked more ominous. It was pointless to search protection in this empty house. No false god would protect you from fate and he was growing weary of chasing you when he could already hold you in his hands and cherish you in the way you deserve as his soulmate. A shame you couldnโt see it yet.
Lorgar took out a knife, plunging it into his own thigh, hitting his femur on purpose and ahead he could hear you scream out and stumble. He pulled it out with a wet sound and approached you slowly. His body would heal itself with ease but the pain would still be present for several minutes if not hours. To him it was nothing. To you it was everything and you were curled up on the floor, clutching your leg and hyperventilating.
โSshhhh..Itโs alright.โ he said, taking your face into his hands and caressing your cheeks. โThe pain is temporary and will give you the clarity you need.โ
Despite everything you were still trying to writhe in his arms when he picked you up and he couldnโt help but admire your unbreakable spirit. Outside the planet was burning and when the smoke and the smell of blood of the impaled corpses of the so called faithful hit your nose you started to cry again but he shushed you with ease.
โDonโt cry about your loss. Instead rejoice that your planet will see the true light. Sicarus and it will be your new home and you will be happy.โ
Alpharius/Omegon
โWhere are you going?โ one of the bald men said that had been following you for two weeks by now.
You hadnโt noticed him or rather them at first. The hab block on the hive world was always dark and your shifts were leaving you drained. Your body was trained at this point to return back home through the familiar alleys and corridors and the exhaustion made you only think about your bed. It was only through pure coincidence that you noticed an unknown presence when you heard one footstep too many behind you. From then on you were never alone.
First it was just stalking throughout your day. While unnerving nothing happened and itโs not like someone wouldโve helped you anyways. Then food started to appear in your room when you couldnโt get any rations and were starving. From your peripheral vision you sometimes saw a flash of something greenish. One time someone there a small pebble against the back of your head and you cursed out the empty alleyway and you couldโve sworn that you heard some laughter from somewhere above. At least you knew from then on that it wasnโt just one person following you.
You had grow used to your silent companions and almost expected to feel their presence. You werenโt sure what their agenda was. Perhaps it had been some kind of test that you knew nothing about. Whatever it was you hoped it would not disturb your day any further. Maybe they could throw you a new bag for your tools through your window if they were already at it.
Today was different though and they have appeared to you in their weird teal armor, talking to you like they were talking about weather and werenโt the one who had followed you for two weeks.
โTo work?โ you said unimpressed by the feigned ignorance. โDonโt you dare to play coy with me now after stalking me for weeks.โ
โWell you could go to work..โ one of the twins said before the other added โbut we have a different proposition for you..โ and somehow you knew you would not be able to refuse.
Tag List: @subtlepoisonknowledge @beckyninja @jackalwolfsoul @stpdeletacc @randomlyappearingartist @celestia042 @the-mysterious-detective @tomatojellyfish @catabibaz0n @ladycoraxofficial @yyourmotherr @warhorny-on-main @primarchpenissucker @thaddeusthebee @honestlychoppedglitter @aggressivemenaceowo (Everyone can be added, just ask in the comments!)
You and Alpha have disagreed about certain parts of your sex life since his injury...
Rating: NC-17, Lemon, etc. Minors DNI!
Word Count: 3,700
Warnings: Disabled sex (limited range of motion), Alpha refuses to make concessions to a different way of doing things, unprotected piv sex, light teasing
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Sheber Taap - Seat
Alpha's lips were so soft.
It was incredible, really. To have such softness in this one place when the rest of his body was made up of scar tissue, cybernetics, and bulging muscleโฆ It was a contrast you never got tired of.
His length was hard, pressed against his own stomach by a combination of blood flow and the way you had pushed yourself as close to him as you could possibly get.
"Neverd'ika," he groaned, barely pulling away. His mouth brushed yours with every syllable and the sensation drove you to desperation. "Need you."
"You've got me, Alpha," you promised, rolling to your feet. You rounded the bed, standing beside him and offering a hand. "Let's go."
Alpha's eyes flicked from you to the chair behind you, sitting inconspicuously in the corner. "Just come back here. I'm tired of using the chair."
You crossed your arms, stepping back and out of reach of his searching hands. "You know your back still has trouble with bending, especially bending forward. We need to keep your spine straight, soโฆ chair."
"My back hardly hurts at all anymore," he said, jaw set in a stubborn line. "I can move just fine, even when I'm bending forward."
"Yes, but until you don't hurt at all, I can't risk it." You shrugged a little, noting the way his eyes drifted down to your breasts with the motion. "Even a little bit of pain is too much."
For a moment, he looked like he was set to argue, but you didn't have time for a debate you would win anyway. "Please, Alpha."
He heaved a sigh, ignoring the hand you offered again. You knew intellectually that you weren't strong enough to help him stand up, but it was an instinct you couldn't always manage to fight. Especially when it was so clearly difficult for him.
With a lot of effort and a grunt or two, Alpha was standing upright. When you laced your fingers through his, he allowed you to lead him over to the chair.
He sat down without making any verbal complaints, though there was a displeased little curve to his lips. You settled slowly and delicately onto his lap, pressing a kiss against that curve until it disappeared into a small smile. And then, when you rolled your hips against him, his entire expression was taken over by an anticipatory groan.
"Are you ready, Alpha?"
He nodded a few times, swallowing thickly. "I've been ready since you took off your shirt, little one."
"That long?" you teased, deliberately brushing your mound against him again.
"Keep teasing," he warned, eyes flashing dangerously, "and I'll show you that my back doesn't hurt anymore."
You didn't dignify that with a response. Instead, you reached between you to position him so that you could sink down onto his length.
Riding Alpha this way was always a challenge, whether he was sitting or laying down. Something about being on top made him feel even larger. You had to be careful or things could get overwhelming, especially when you were just getting started. That being said, you had gotten plenty of practice over the past few weeks.
As soon as Alpha was cleared to return to ARC training, Ransom had said he was okay to have sex again, but had given him a list of some particular movements and positions that would make things easier. This had been the one that worked best for both of you.
The initial stretch was familiar now, something you could handle without outwardly reacting. Your inner muscles still took a moment to adjust, but after a few breaths and a kiss to Alpha's collarbone, you planted your toes on the floor and started to move.
Your feet barely reached the floor at the top of each stroke, leaving you extending your leg muscles as far as you possibly could to rise off of his lap. Alpha felt huge this way, jutting up into you so deeply that you could hardly breathe when you settled back down onto his thighs. Or perhaps it was just the way that put pressure on all the right placesโฆ
Alpha muffled your moan when he pressed those soft lips to yours, distracting you with the desperation of his kiss. Your hands were braced against his shoulders for purchase, using their breadth as leverage as you worked up and down on top of him, or you would have cradled his face the way he was doing to yours.
He seemed to realize that limitation at the same time you did. All of a sudden, Alpha's hands seemed to be everywhere. Stroking down the length of your arms, brushing delicately against your nipples, resting just above your ass, circling over your clitโฆ
"Alpha," you groaned, trying to speed up despite the burning in your thigh muscles. "I'm not going to last long if you keep doing that."
"Can't help it, neverd'ika," Alpha confessed remorselessly. "I love watching you fall apart on top of me."
You involuntarily tightened around him at that. Your moan was nearly drowned out by his curse. His hands wrapped around your waist, holding on as he visibly struggled to stay still beneath you.
"You're killing me." Alpha's head tipped back, connecting lightly with the wall. "You feel so good. Can you go a little faster?"
"I'm trying." You reached further with your toes, trying to see if you could find a firmer purchase on the floor. When your foot slipped out from under you for the second time, you and Alpha both gasped at the resulting firmer-than-usual downstroke. "We should really look into a shorter chair."
"Or getting rid of it entirely."
You shook your head at the familiar complaint. Alpha seemed to have taken the chair as a personal insult, but it was necessary.
When you lifted back up off of him, it was so easy that the thick slide of him leaving you was overwhelming. Your eyes fluttered closed at the feeling, as well as the thrust of him back inside of you.
Two more easy strokes passed before you frowned. Why were you moving so easily now when you had been struggling so hard before? Now that you thought to pay attention to something so far outside of what you were concentrating onโฆ your left foot definitely wasn't even touching the floor now.
Your eyes snapped open again, your suspicious gaze immediately caught by the blue cybernetics implanted in Alpha's side. Their glow was bright - Alpha was using his increased strength and the grip he had around your waist to lever you up and down.
"Alpha!" Your admonishment was as sharp as you could make it, distracted by the way he was brushing that magical spot inside you - a spot you rarely managed to angle him against when you were the one in charge of the movement - and the way Alpha's eyes had gone heavy-lidded with pleasure.
Alpha released you immediately after your shocked chiding. "Sorry, little one. I got carried away."
"You could have hurt yourself!"
"I needed to know I could still make you feel good."
You rested your hands on his pecs, leaning in to press your forehead against his. "Alpha, you always make me feel good. But I can't let you risk hurting yourself for something so minor."
"Being with you isn't something I consider minor," he told you seriously. "Besides, helping you along a little wasn't going to hurt me."
You huffed out a breath at him. "If us having sex in a bed could cause you another injury, you lifting my entire body weight - putting all the strain on your back, by the way - could do even worse!"
"I was engineered to handle more than double your weight at my weakest moment." Alpha was definitely pouting by that point. "When are you going to admit that I've recovered enough to be with you off of this karkin' chair?"
"When bending forward to eat your food doesn't make you break out into a sweat." You lifted yourself off of his lap, giving him a look of warning when he reached out as if to help you. "I know it's frustrating for you that you're not fully recovered yet, but pushing things too far too soon is only increasing the risk of getting another injury or making the ones you have worse."
"Wait," Alpha said, reaching out to catch your hand with his before you could walk away. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have tried to lift you, especially when I knew how you would feel about it."
"I would think you'd be upset for your own sake, not because I'm mad." Alpha's carefully blank expression told you everything about what he would do if he wasn't worried you would be angry. "Alphaโฆ"
"I won't lie to you, cyare, I think I'm well enough to be with you the way we were before all of this." Your eyes followed the gesture he made down toward his lower half, but it only served to remind you how close you had come to losing him. How scared you had been.
How scared he had been.
"It's not worth the risk, Alpha. I know you hate the chair-"
"I hate the di'kutla chair."
"-but it's keeping you from reinjuring your back," you finished, giving him a pointed look. "If there were another position that kept you from moving your hips forward, we could try it, but I just haven't done the research."
"I have," Alpha told you, getting to his feet. His erection bobbed between you, half-comical and fully mouth-watering as you considered what other positions might bring him some relief without requiring the hated chair.
"Mmm?" you hummed, realizing that you should probably look back at his face. When you did, Alpha was wearing a satisfied little smirk that made you give a rueful smile in return. "You've done what?"
"Researched positions that could work for us." Alpha ducked down slightly as he reached you, swiping his thumb over your cheek as he cupped your jaw. "Do you trust me?"
"Of course."
He smiled, tilting your head up so he could kiss you. When he finally pulled away, Alpha said, "Thank you, ner karta."
You were slightly dazed as you stood there, watching him neatly fold the blankets on your bed down to the foot of the mattress. In the empty expanse left by the lack of covers, he arranged a stack of pillows at the very edge of his side of the bed.
With that done, he turned back to you and patted the pile of pillows. "Hips here."
It wasn't the most dignified position, but you could make it workโฆ As you were clambering into place, Alpha's hand on your hip made you pause. When you looked at him, his face was slightly red beneath an apologetic expression.
"Sorry, neverd'ika, I should have said- Uh. The advice I read recommended that you be facedown."
That was a little different for the two of you. Alpha wanted nothing more than to watch your face when he was inside of you, and you had been surprised by how much you loved watching his expression as he got closer and closer to the edge. It wouldn't be the first time he had taken you from behind, but it would be the first time he requested it instead of it being a matter of convenience.
You paused, awkwardly half-propped on the pillows. "Does it matter?"
"I'm- not sureโฆ" he said slowly. "It said facedown, but I don't know if that's a requirement or just how they described it."
With a shrug and a comforting smile for Alpha, you said, "Easy enough to fix."
You flipped over, settling into the position he had described. The stack of pillows under your hips left your upper body pressed into the mattress in an undignified way, but propping yourself on your elbows put uncomfortable pressure on your spine, so you settled fully onto your belly. Your legs were dangling in the air and a mental image of how you must look made your face go hot with embarrassment.
"Not the sexiest position," you joked, turning your face to the side so you could breathe.
"You're not seeing what I am." Alpha's voice had gone husky with want, drawing an instant response from your body.
Sudden and sharp, you realized that Alpha was standing between your spread legs and eyeing everything you had on display. That awareness made your body tighten as your core went liquid for him.
"Thisโฆ" You stopped to gulp down a quick gasp of air. "This position might work for me after all."
A touch - so gentle it was barely there - traced the swollen lips of your sex and you shuddered. "Yeah? Better than the chair?"
You rolled your eyes, but they fluttered shut as he pressed a single finger into you. When he had buried it up to the knuckle in your heat, another finger ghosted over your clit and your lips parted so you could take a shuddering breath.
"What are you doing?" you asked, trying to keep the tremble from your voice.
"Appreciating you," came his answer, and it somehow sent a flutter through your heart and your sex simultaneously.
He began to pump his finger in and out of you, the motion gentle and unhurried but still maddening. He added a little twist to the movement every time he withdrew from you and your hips tried to chase the movement. The pleasure was rising faster than you had expected, but there were questions that still needed to be answered.
You fought to keep your mind clear as you asked, "How is this position going to keep your back stable?"
"I'll move my whole body instead of just my hips." The casual way he explained it sent heat through you. You were on the brink of falling apart and he was still so coherent. "Since flexing my hips forward is the only thing I'm struggling with, this position should minimize how much flexing I need to do. And you're at the perfect height for me like this."
You nodded, barely able to process anything past the need he was building inside of you. You understood that he wasn't going to be straining himself in this position - and it was definitely working for you - so you could melt into the pleasure.
At least, you did until Alpha withdrew his hand and stopped touching you entirely.
"Does that work for you, neverd'ika?"
From his tone, you knew that he was teasing you. With the bone-deep need rising in your gut, you nodded quickly. Alpha pressed, "Are you sure? I'll need you to tell me if there's something you want me to do differently."
"Now you're the one-" You broke off, voice hitching sharply when his teasing touch returned, barely making contact with the petals of your sex before disappearing. "-the one killing me."
His rumbling laugh made you shift impatiently against the pillows. "When are you- ooooohโฆ"
Alpha pressed into you, and your desperately-clutching muscles welcomed him eagerly inside. He felt bigger than ever from this angle, stretching your walls around him, and you writhed at how full you felt. Your fingers clutched in the sheets on the bed, trying to keep yourself grounded as he steadily worked himself inside you.
When he was finally buried as deep as he could go, Alpha paused so you could both appreciate the sensation. Your inner muscles danced over his length, trying to get used to the blissful intrusion. You weren't sure - you never were - but it almost felt like you were clenched around him so tightly that you could feel his pulse throbbing in your core.
Alpha's hands, wrapped around your hips, clutched you tightly and your body convulsed with desperate need. Alpha grunted, hips surging forward so he could sink a fraction deeper.
"You're so tight," he bit out.
You whined in agreement, trying to rock forward and back on your stack of pillows. He had to start moving soon or you would die from delayed gratification. That was the only explanation for the maelstrom raging through you.
Thankfully, Alpha must have felt the same because he finally started to move.
There was no reason, logically speaking, that this should have felt as overwhelming as it did. You had sex with Alpha more times than you could specifically remember over the course of your relationship, and a lot of those times had been far more strenuous or fast-paced than this.
As far as you could tell with your temporarily-limited capacity for higher brain function, it had just been so long since you weren't the one controlling everything. Alpha had never needed to be in charge, not like some others you had heard about, but he tended to be the one setting the pace for most of your encounters. At least, he had before Grievous.
Since his injury, sex with Alpha had been limited to a handful of times in highly controlled situations. He couldn't support any weight, couldn't move his hips, couldn't move his body too much or he risked another injury. You had made it work, but you had been in control for a lot of it. You had always ridden him or - once - laid on your side with him behind you for easier access. Oral sex from him was out of the question simply as a matter of position, though you had used your mouth on him a few times.
This was different. You weren't used to not being the one in control of the pace, depth, stimulationโฆ Your movements were limited by your position on your stomach and by the pile of pillows beneath you. You didn't know what was going to happen and you couldn't do anything but take it. The idea excited you in a way you couldn't quite explain but weren't going to question.
And, true to his word, this position didn't seem to be hurting Alpha.
You couldn't see him to check whether he was avoiding flexing his hips, but it certainly felt like he wasn't. Each stroke came slow and methodical, heavy in a way that said he was moving his entire body. The thrusts pounded against you in a series of percussive collisions that were a little jarring and a lot stimulating. More than once, you found yourself drooling helplessly onto the mattress.
The whole situation unlocked something in you and your orgasm was rising up to meet you fast enough that you needed to warn Alpha. "I'm-"
"I'm not going to last long, neverd'ika," Alpha admitted at the same time you began to speak. "'m close."
"Good," you said immediately. "I'm gonna-"
Alpha squeezed your hips again. "Come for me, ner karta."
And with only that encouragement, the wave of pleasure crashed over you. Every muscle in your core locked down and started squeezing. Somehow, Alpha managed to keep his pace for another handful of thrusts before he surged forward, hips pulsing against yours as he emptied himself as deep inside you as possible.
When you were self-aware enough to take account of your surroundings, Alpha was slumped over you, his chest pressed against your back. He kissed your shoulder, the hint of stubble on his jaw tickling your skin. You sighed at the tender touch, but cracked open one eye to peer back at him.
"You're going to hurt your spine."
Alpha huffed out a laugh. "Of all the things I'm feeling right now, 'hurt' isn't one of them."
You smiled, letting your eye fall shut again. "Same. That was incredible."
"Better than the chair?" he asked impishly.
After a moment of thought, you said, "I think you can throw the chair off the platform."
"It's a deal." Alpha paused. "As soon as I can move again."
"So it's not just me." With a laugh, you admitted, "I'm not using to hanging off the bed like this. My toes are going numb."
That was enough to jolt him into movement, and Alpha gingerly repositioned you on the bed without lifting you up. When you were nestled comfortably on your side of the bed, you smiled up at Alpha and he joined you, pushing the pile of pillows unceremoniously to the floor.
After a few moments of silence - you wriggling across the bed to tuck your head into the crook between his shoulder and neck - Alpha took a breath.
"Thank you." Before you could gather the energy to ask what he was thanking you for, Alpha continued, "Not everyone would be willing to put up with this from their partner."
"You don't make it easy," you agreed, smiling despite yourself at his insulted noise. "I just need you to stop going out of your way to hurt yourself."
"I meant that you're willing to change and adjust." You could feel him look down at you. "I know things are rough right now."
You sat up, ignoring twinges of soreness in your hips and the small of your back. "Alpha, you make it sound like I was ever going to do anything else. I'm never not going to fight for you. You understand that, right?"
He blinked at you a few times. Somewhere around the fourth blink, you realized that his eyes had gone glassy with the tears he was fighting back. Your hand lifted on its own, cupping his jaw gently. His hand covered yours immediately, pressing it harder against the warmth of his skin.
"Kar'taylir darasuum, ner karta."
"Cyar'ika," you returned in kind, knowing full-well that your smile was dopey and lovesick. Worse, you were far beyond the point of caring. "Kar'taylir darasuum."
Alpha pressed his forehead to yours in the gentlest keldabe and only pulled away when he drifted off to sleep. You allowed yourself a moment or two to admire him, visually tracing every line of his softened expression, before you joined him.
---
Author's Note - Sorry to drop this at such an odd time, but I was determined to post today! I barely made it, but I did it!
Just because these two were even more sickly cute than usual, I feel the need to say that they are NOT married. In this universe, I'm working off the Legends (possibly fanon) Mandalorian wedding process of just saying the vows and being married, even without any witnesses. If you need backstory, just assume that Kal Skirata and Walon Vau taught the Alpha ARCs about Mandalorian culture along with the Nulls and commando squads.
Anyway, the end of this chapter felt very weddingish, but I promise they're not quite there yet. They just really, REALLY love each other and are a pair of hopelessly romantic saps!
Also, I know I play fast and loose with Mando'a in general, but this is a pairing of two words (position and sit) that I'm just going to say roughly translate to "a place of sitting". We're just going to go with it.
Thank you for reading and I'll see you next month!
also I don't think parents "these days" are uniquely terrible, I just think neglect is showing up in new ways as technology progresses. today's ipad kid would've been wandering around in a ditch alone all day and night before. parents not wanting to have to deal with children is not a new phenomenon.
the worst part of summer is that people get sooo comfortable expressing their disgust at having to see other peopleโs bodies. theyโre always complaining about wrinkly old men at the nude hot springs or fat women in bikinis at the beach. I hate that shit. if youโre not capable of being normal about bodies you personally donโt find attractive, just turn your head to look at something else! and if youโre not smart enough to do that, then at least do the rest of us the courtesy of suffering in silence, because we donโt wanna hear your weird comments. thanks.
The Lion
He doesnโt play, he supervises developmental exercises. The child wants to play hide and seek and he agrees. They count to ten, turn around and he is simply gone, not behind the curtains or under the table, truly gone. Thirty minutes later the child is crying because they think daddy left forever until a shadow drops from the ceiling.
โI have won.โ
The child screams and the Lion looks faintly alarmed. โโฆWasnโt this the objective?โ
Guilliman has to explain that hide and seek with toddlers is not meant to involve stealth doctrine or waiting in the ventilation shaft like a forest cryptid, the Lion takes notes. Next time he hides behind a chair with half his body visible.
โDaddy! I found you!โ The child gasps.
โImpossible.โ The Lion is emotionally wounded by the tactical failure but spiritually healed by their joy.
Fulgrim
Fulgrimโs child wants to play dress-up, within twenty minutes there are ribbons, pearls, tiny gloves, seven kinds of silk and Fulgrim has turned an innocent game into a full imperial runway production. The child toddles out wearing a sparkly cape and a paper crown, Fulgrim drops to one knee as though witnessing the birth of art itself. โExquisite. Revolutionary. Trully daring!โ he says.
The child demands he wear the pink tutu and Fulgrim does it, he doesnโt merely wear it, he serves. The child claps and Fulgrim spins dramatically. โFor you, my little muse, I would shame empires.โ
Perturabo
Perturaboโs child wants to build a pillow fort, he hears โsiege architecture practical examโ and begins by asking them about load bearing points.
โI want the blue blanket.โ They reply and he nods solemnly.
The pillow fort starts small then Perturabo brings in measuring tools and a diagram, after an hour the living room contains a reinforced multilevel pillow citadel with crawl tunnels, curtain walls, snack storage and a moat made of plush animals.
โThis is my castle.โ The child says as they crawl inside with a juice box.
โYes.โ Perturabo, standing outside with a clipboard.
โYou can come in too.โ
He crawls in very carefully, knees sticking out, shoulders destroying one side wall.
โYouโre too big.โ The child pats his face. Perturabo stares at the collapsed section devastated until the child hands him a stuffed bunny. โYou can guard.โ
Perturabo spends the next four hours guarding the pillow fortress with murderous seriousness.
Jaghatai Khan
Jaghataiโs child wants to play ponies and he agrees immediately. Within five minutes, the ponies have names like Wind Breaker and Thunder Hoof and are racing across the furniture. He makes tiny saddles out of napkins and begins narrating a great migration across the living room carpet. The kid is delighted. โAgain! Again!โ
The next thing anyone knows they are both riding actual horses through the palace garden. Malcador sees them pass by a window, the kid is shrieking with joy and Jaghatai is laughing, there is a toy pony tied to his saddle like a sacred war banner.
โTHIS ONE IS FASTESTโ the child screams.
โTHEN SHE SHALL LEAD THE HOSTโ Jaghatai answers.
Later the Emperor receives three complaints, two property damage reports and one drawing of a horse with lightning legs titled Daddyโs Friend.
Russ
Russ' child wants to play wolves, they crawl around the floor growling at each other.
โIโm the biggest wolfโ the kid says.
Leman immediately drops onto his back. โAye, you are the alpha.โ
They climb onto his chest and howl, Russ howls back so loudly that three nearby windows crack, the kid laughs until they hiccup.
Then they decide he isnโt a wolf anymore but a mountain so they climbs him. Russ lies still on the floor while this tiny child scales him by grabbing his beard, armor straps, hair, nose and dignity. Every time they reach his shoulder he gently rolls over and says โAvalanche!โ. The kid squeals and falls into a pile of furs. This repeats forty six times and at the end they fall asleep on top of him.
โNo one move.โ Russ whispers, he remains on the floor for six hours. Several Space Wolves enter, see him pinned by a sleeping toddler and treat it as a sacred vigil.
Dorn
The child wants to play blocks and Dorn sits down. He is prepared, he has blocks, patience and a plan. They stack three blocks, knock them down and giggle.
Dorn nods. โDemolition testing.โ
They stack them again, sideways this time.
โInteresting.โ Dornโs eye twitches.
They put a triangle block at the bottom and a square on top. Dorn visibly suffers but he says nothing because they are happy.
โYou build, daddy.โ They hand him a block.
Dorn builds a perfect miniature fortress in six minutes. It has towers, gates, symmetrical walls and no unnecessary ornamentation. The child looks at it and places a tiny duck on the battlements.
Dorn stares at the duck. โThe duck isnโt defensible.โ
โHe lives there.โ
He nods after a long pause. โThe duck is now the governor.โ From that day forward every fortress he builds for them includes a duck tower.
Perturabo questions it once and Dorn replies dead serious.
โThe duck is load-bearing.โ
Konrad Curze
Konradโs child wants to play tea party. He is sitting cross legged on the floor in a room full of dolls, tiny cups and one very suspicious teddy bear. The child pours imaginary tea and he accepts the tiny cup with both clawed hands. โThank youโ he whispers.
The doll beside him has been sentenced to death for treason.
โNo, daddy, Mr. Buttons said sorryโ the child says.
Konrad slowly turns toward the doll.โDid he.โ
The child nods and Konrad leans very close to the doll. โI am watching you.โ
The tea party continues and the child offers him a fake wooden biscuit. He pretends to eat it and the child beams, this does something terrible and unfamiliar inside his chest.
โYouโre the princess.โ the child says.
โ...No.โ
โYouโre the princess.โ
Konrad looks at the tiny plastic crown then at their hopeful face. Ten minutes later Sanguinius walks past the room and sees him wearing a glitter crown, sitting among plush animals, speaking in a rasping whisper. โThe princess has seen the future, the kingdom falls by dawn.โ
โNo, daddy, the kingdom has cookies.โ the child says.
Konrad pauses. โThe kingdom may yet be spared.โ
Sanguinius
Sanguiniusโs child wants to play flying, he picks them up gently and lifts them into the air, wings spreading like sunrise.
โHigher!โ They scream with joy.
โNot too high, little heart.โ
โHigher!โ
He gives in immediately and glides through the garden, slow and safe, their tiny hands buried in his hair.
The kid demands they rescue the stuffed rabbit from the โtowerโ (a table), Sanguinius approaches it with full mythic seriousness. โFear not, noble rabbit, salvation comes.โ He carries both the child and rabbit in a heroic arc through the room, everyone nearby stops to watch because it is objectively beautiful.
Horus watches from the doorway. โThat child could ask him for Terra and he would give it.โ
โShe asked nicely.โ Sanguinius replies.
Ferrus
The child wants to play dolls. Ferrus looks at the dolls and sees that they are poorly jointed and weak.
โThese arms will break.โ
โHer name is Princess Sparkle.โ the child says.
Ferrus takes Princess Sparkle with grave respect and within an hour it has reinforced limbs, articulated fingers, a tiny metal spine and a faceplate that can withstand a hammer strike. The child loves it, Ferrus tries to look indifferent but fails.ย
They ask him to make a bed for the doll and Ferrus makes a bed, a chair, a tiny forge and a full working miniature workshop. The doll now has better equipment than some Legions.
โDaddy, she needs a friend.โ
Ferrus looks at the remaining dolls and they are weak too. โBring them all.โ By evening the playroom contains an army of upgraded dolls with chrome limbs and terrifying durability. The child hugs his arm and Ferrus quietly makes Princess Sparkle a crownโฆ Itโs made of iron.
Angron
Angronโs child wants to play tag. โYou run and I will chase slowly.โ He kneels down and says with enormous seriousness. They run and Angron follows at the speed of a depressed refrigerator. โRaaahโ he says carefully and the child shrieks with laughter. He reaches for them, misses on purpose and ends up smashing his hand through a table.
โDaddy, you broke it.โ
Angron looks at the table then down at his own hand. โI did.โ
They toddle back and pats his arm. โItโs okay, we can play gently.โ He sits on the floor and the child shows him patty-cake.
Angron, who has killed armies, now sits cross legged learning how to clap hands softly. He gets it wrong the first time and claps too hard, blowing a cushion across the room. The child laughs anyway, by the end he is whispering the rhyme with deadly concentration.
Guilliman
The child wants to play office because they have seen Guilliman doing paperwork and have mistaken it for entertainment. Guilliman is devastated but supportive.
โWhat is your decree, my regent?โ
They scribble on paper. โMore cookies.โ
โA popular measure but logistically complex.โ
The child stamps the paper with a wooden block. โApproved.โ
He reads it (itโs mostly spirals) and treats it as legally binding. Soon the entire household has been reorganized according to toddler law.
Guilliman starts drafting an implementation framework and the child puts a sticker on his forehead. โYou work for me.โ
He smiles softly. โI always have.โ
Later, someone asks why there is a formal memo titled Household Edict Regarding Mandatory teddy bear Attendance.
โIt passed through the proper channels.โ Guilliman replies.
Mortarion
Mortarionโs child wants to play garden and he takes it extremely seriously. They go outside to a patch of stubborn soil and strange herbs, he shows them which plants are poisonous, which are medicinal and which ones bite back if you insult them.
He lets them wear tiny gloves and dig holes, the child names every worm and Mortarion remembers every worm name.
โThis is Sir Wiggle.โ
โSir Wiggle is strong.โ Mortarion says gravely.
They make him wear a flower crown and he stares into the distance like a man enduring public execution but doesnโt remove it. A Death Guard marine sees him and immediately looks away with survival instincts.
โYouโre prettyโ the child says.
โUnlikelyโ he mutters.
They add more flowers. He sits there, enormous and grim, covered in daisies, holding a watering can the size of a teacup.
โThe garden smells nice.โ the child says. Mortarion, who has never once been associated with a pleasant smell in his life, quietly decides this is the finest garden in the galaxy.
Magnus the Red
Magnusโs child wants a bedtime story and he is delighted. โOnce, before the first turning of the empyrean spheres-โ He begins.
โPrincess.โ They interrupt.
Magnus adjusts. โOnce, before the first turning of the empyrean spheres, there was a princess-โ
โDragon.โ
โ-and a dragon, who represented the eternal hunger of hidden knowledge-โ
โNo, daddy, silly dragon.โ
Magnus pauses, this is advanced literary critique. He changes course, the dragon now wears a hat, the child approves. He conjures glowing images in the air of castles, stars, moons and tiny dancing frogs. The child keeps demanding more frogs, the story becomes less about destiny and more about frog politics. Magnus is deeply invested.
โAnd thus the princess declared that all frogs should have equal access to cake.โ
The child nods already sleepy.
โGood.โ Magnus lowers his voice. โThe kingdom rejoiced.โ
He keeps whispering the story for another hour because he wants to know what happens next.
Horus
Horusโs kid wants to play king, dangerously charismatic dad mode activated.
The child puts a blanket around his shoulders. โYouโre the king.โ
He bows his head. โAnd you?โ
โIโm the boss.โ
Horus laughs so hard he nearly falls over. โOf course you are.โ
The child immediately begins issuing commands and Horus obeys all of them, the warmaster of the great crusade crawls across the floor pretending to be a horse. The Mournival walks in and Horus is wearing a blanket cape, carrying a stuffed animal court and negotiating peace between two dolls.
Abaddon opens his mouth and Horus points at him.
โCareful, the boss is in a decisive mood.โ
The child points the spoon at Abaddon. โDance.โ
He dances. Horus has never been prouder.
Lorgar
Lorgarโs child wants to play school so they line up the stuffed animals in rows and give Lorgar a tiny chair. The chair is made for a child so he sits on the floor instead, knees folded, enormous and reverent.
The child points at him with a crayon. โYou are the student.โ
Lorgar clasps his hands. โI am ready to receive wisdom.โ
They draw a circle on paper. โThis is the sun.โ
โA symbol of illumination, revelation, and divine constancy.โ Lorgar nods solemnly.
He is given homework, he needs to draw a cat. Lorgar draws an anatomically perfect feline surrounded by radiant script, golden halos and seventeen lines of devotional commentary.
โNo, daddy, the cat is supposed to be silly.โ
Lorgar takes this correction with the seriousness of a condemned prophet and draws a second cat. It has crossed eyes, four whiskers on one side and legs like noodles.
โGood job!โ The child beams.
Lorgarโs soul nearly leaves his body. No sermon, no conquest, no cathedral, no burning truth whispered by gods has ever struck him so deeply as his kid saying good job. He carefully tapes the silly cat drawing to the wall.
โMy lord, is this significant?โ Erebus sees it later and asks.
Lorgar turns slowly. โItโs my finest work.โ
Vulkan
The child wants to play kitchen and Vulkan immediately puts on a tiny apron. It doesnโt fit and looks like a napkin tied to a mountain.
โWe make soup.โ The child gave him a wooden spoon and a plastic bowl.
โWhat kind?โ
โRock soup.โ
A single pebble is placed in the bowl and he looks at it with deep respect.
โA hearty meal.โ
They add leaves, buttons and one toy lizard. Vulkan stirs carefully with his huge hands, moving like he is handling sacred glass. Vulkan pretends to taste and the child's eyes widen.
โBy the fires of Nocturne, itโs incredible.โ
The child declares it perfect, climbs into his lap and feeds him imaginary soup for twenty minutes. Vulkan eats every spoonful and says thank you each time.
Corvus Corax
The child wants to play shadow puppets, finally a game made for him. They sit in a dim room with a candle, Corvus makes a bird with his hands and they gasp. He makes a wolf, they clap. He makes a bat, a dragon, a tiny dancing man and something that may be a symbol of imperial oppression but the child thinks it is a bunny so itโs a bunny now. Then they try, their puppet is just a blob.
Corvus leans close. โA perfect raven.โ The child beams and he is destroyed.
Later they play sneak up. Corvus hears it every time, the child is breathing loudly, giggling and stepping on every creaky board but each time they jump out yelling boo Corvus throws himself backward dramatically like he has been mortally wounded.
โYou have slain me.โ
They cackle and poke him. โAgain.โ
Corvus resurrects. This continues until they fall asleep on his cloak.
Alpharius Omegon
The child wants to play guessing games.
One of them stands in front of her. โWhich one am I?โ
They squints. โDaddy.โ
โYes, but which Daddy?โ
They point. โThat one.โ
โCorrect.โ
The other twin, from behind the sofa: โHow?โ
The kid shrugs. โYou smell like sneaky.โ Both twins are delighted and offended.
They decide to play with dolls. Every doll has a secret identity, the tea party has three false locations, the teddy bear is a double agent and the stuffed duck has been replaced by an identical stuffed duck. The kid follows none of this and simply feeds everyone pretend cake.
Eventually the child grabs both of their hands. โNo tricks, play normal.โ The twins look at each other horrified but they obey. For twenty full minutes, no one lies, swaps places, creates a decoy or claims to be someone else,itโs the most difficult operation of their lives.
The child kisses both their cheeks. โGood daddies.โ
โWorth it.โ One twin whispers.
โThis never happened.โ The other replies.:
Teeth, bites, flesh, blood. Borhing is sacred anymore, nothing can remain pure.
Stop running, there's no escaping.
Please, please, please.
No one want you, I do.
You cannot leave me.
I'll die!
JUST LOVE ME.
"GASP!"
You abruptly opened your eyes, moving frantically your head around. You felt the warm wet cotton of the pillow, you must had deenched it with your sweats. The room was dark, the candles long gone consumed by the time, and the Baal's sun had a long journey before his rise. The few lights came from the stars and the aircrafts that sometime passed through, placidly like cloud, ignoring the tower and its content.
You gasped again for some air, freeing yourself from the covers of the bed, allowing yourself to sit properly. Deep long breath to help you stabilize your heartbeat, your hands moving from your face to your head, finger across stray of hair.
It was a nightmare...just a nightmare....kinda...
You looked around the room between your fingers, everything was
just like always. Golden decorations, a bed that even the richer of the nobles could envy, treasures made for a queen, a space that could have been a house for someone. It was perfect, it was beautifull and it was your cage.
You were still there, this knowledge filled you with bile and bitterness. And that dream? A mirroring of what was happening, surrounded by corrupted children that feasted on human blood and a sickening form of love that tasted more like venom.
The lock on the door clicked and you wanted just to get over with.
You had always been curious how these "super senses" the Primarchs and their warriors had, wich oind of level they can go, if they were restricted to only the battle, if they could be misleaded or deceived. You had learned long ago that a Primarch could hear an heart beat even when walls separetd him from the spurce of it. You were once surprised, than it scared you, now you just sighed deeply when his hands started to stroking your back, like if his presence wasn't already insufferable and stressing for you.
Sanguinius was always beautifull, like if he was made to reincarnate that simple characteristic. Being a day surrounded by politicians, being in a formal attire or drenched in his enemies blood, the Angel was nothing bit a sight to behold. Even now, his hair still a mess, his night robes messy for his sudden awakening, his wings twitched for the stress, he was absolutely stunning. His expression one of a grieving lover, that nothing more wish for his soul mate to be safe and sound.
"My love...is everything okay? You must had a nightmare..."
You wanted to spat out that no, nothing was okay and he was the source of the stress, but you didn't wanted him more moody that he could be. A sad Sanguinius means being pestered with his sons, and they cared more for their gene-sire to be happy than you without a broken bone.
He looked almost sad, you bet that when being in love can lead you to suffer while your partner is in distress, even this was completely far from what you wanted for yourself.
You just nodded. You couldn't lie even if you wanted ,you tried many times and ha had sniffed the lies like a rotten body in the desert.
He clicked his tongue, more like assesting his theory. He pressed you against him, givonf you the comfort you needed, or that he said you did, from his warmth and pressure he could provide. He ceased his attents of comforting you only to retrieve a glass of water.
"Drink. You eaten so little tonight, at least dome water will help..."
"..."
You stared at it, wondering if he would finally succumb to his obsession and opting to just drug you and use you as he pleased.
"Just one sip?"
...No. As low ad he had gone, drugs weren't his style, you thought while grabbing the glass and allowing some of the cold liquid to refreshing your throat. It felt nice, that much that you finished the glass content. You ignored his smile, the same one he do everytime you accept anything from him, being food or gifts.
"Better?"
You just nodded, forcing yourself to at least try not talk too much. Expressing yourself meaned aknoweldge him, and aknoweldge him meant that he had made a step forward against you and that was the least you wanted, gave him hope...
The panic rised when you felt the weight of the bed shoft again, this time on your side, feeling yourself abruptly incline to your side. Your hand met his chest almost by insticts, your voice low for the tiredness, anger and fear.
"NO."
You could do little against the strenght of a demi god like him, yet you refused to allow him to take advantage of your state. You were still vigil enough to stop any chance of depraved act from him. He looked almost mortified, riising one hand to calm you down while the other moved away the one stopping him.
"I won't do anything. I'll stay enough for you to fall at asleep. Let me guards your dreams..."
You wanted to remind him that, if it wasn't for him, you wouldn't have any nightmare to begin with. Isntead, again, you just turned around, giving him your back.
"Do what you want. You do it anyway..."
...At least you weren't shouting at him, those were his thoughts while he rested his head against the pillow opposite to yours.
///
Slow and rhythmic breath, your heart slowing down to allowing the basic function to work, the slightly yet almost comfortable sounds of your organs moving inside your body.
Sanguinius knew you were aslepp even by being inches from you.
He liked to see you sleeping, it wasn't something that he had done on regular basis but he loved the serenity that your body emanated in that state. You were always guarded like a mouse that ,even if caged, is ready to bite at any attempts of being taken. You did bited him many times, it never hurted him of course...never physically at least.
When you were asleep, the muscles on your face weren't contracted in that grimace of hate he had been forced to stand since he had took you. Your cheeks were smooths, your lips slightly parted, your forehead straight. Only when you allowed your guard to finally back down, when tiredness was too heavy for your hate to sustain, you finally took the form of the creature he had fallen in love so much.
If you could only shared with him that sweet smile, everything would be perfect.
He could only pictured it now, your body refusing even now to face him, but he had memorized the details to not know how you looked even now. And he hated himself for that.
You didn't deserved that, you didn't deserved anything he had done to you, but he had no choice. If he haven't took you by force, his forces would have annihilated you alongside your home planet, you would have been killed, exposed as a member of those defecting humans and forse: forgotten.
He couldn't allow it but he couldn't take a stand for a planet that had clearly being wrong against his father judgement. The only thing that he wnated to save was you, the princess, and that smile he had saw when he know you weren't looking.
You couldn't know the truth, it was far too much to understand that he had saw you at his side, as his Queen, in a bright future, one where there was no fire, no death. You were his hope and so he did what he had, took you and hope for something better.
And you hated him for that.
He rised his finger, daring even with his nail to touch your shoulder. He had no courage to touch you when you were fast asleep, even now he felt like he was committed a ferocious sin when the tip oh his phalange to caress the exposed skin of your arm, feeling the small imperfections, the few hairs, the softness and the hardness.
He wished he could have done it without sneaking around, with your consent and love for him.
He needed to be carefull, to avoiding it, but his desire was far too much to not try to get closer and allow your parfume to engulf his nostrils while his face sinked in your hair.
You moved, slightly, but he didn't moved.
He didn't know how to feel, he realized when you stopped. He didn't know if he was angry, furious, in love, sad or anything that could allow him to know the meaning of that pain in his chest everytime his eyes met yours. He needed you and he hated what you had made him become, he loved you and needed you to gave him back what he once had.
โI wish you would just let me have you...โ His voice a mix of sorrow and ferociousness.
"Everything will be better after that...I know you hate me...I did terrible things to you...But what choice did I had?"
His voice now broken by a silent sob.
"I didn't planned for this...I'm sorry...Just love me...It would make the guilt feel les smiserable..."
You were his captive princess as you had imprisoned his heart.
When Grace dies he asks for his body to be turned to ashes, and then into a statue. The statue has him sitting, legs crossed, arms curled slightly, with his palms on his knees. He says in his final message there is a reason for this very specific positioning, but that he can't say what it is.
Time continues forward. Rocky and Adrian grow and change. They move house a couple of times. Rocky changes career from engineer, to inventor, to scientist, to diplomat, to teacher. Adrian picks up a new hobby every few decades. They explore other parts of Erid they've never seen. They meet humans on more than one occasion, but there's something about it... Something not quite right. The Eridian mind can never forget, and no matter how much time passes, Rocky feels it. Missing Grace. His human.
And then time really does move on. Rocky walks stiffly, Adrian sleeps for weeks at a time, they both eat less often due to how draining it is.
And one day, the temperature is perfect. Adrian wakes earlier than they have in years. The warmth loosens Rocky's arthritis, the wind is quiet that day, and sound can carry for miles because of it. The soil is quiet, ready, resonant. And they both know.
They go for a walk, take a dip in the sea, attend a choir in a crystal cave. And then, without fanfare, when no one else is around, they visit Grace. And Rocky climbs into his stone lap. And Adrian curls their body around Grace too. Just like Grace did hundreds of years ago, they let go, no scream, no pain, just peace and togetherness. Too beautifully intertwined to ever untangle.
And there they sit, three stones, for the rest of time.
I was given Easy mode Primarch and fuckin Soulsborn NG+ Primarch
Ferrus is 100% thanks to @bispecsual because I had literally nothing
Yandere Sanguinius
To catch the eye of the angel of Baal was a feat many would dream to have but knowing what you know... you'd hardly wish it upon your worst enemies. He is kind... he is sweet... but there is a wrath that dances just behind his eyes. The gentle coo that leaves his lips as a room is painted red with limbs and viscera and not a drop upon you. Though should blood touch you... it is because the Red angel willed it.
He was certainly kind... he was certainly sweet... he was certainly thoughtful... but there was something few forgot about the Angel.... he always got his mission done... many wish to sing the praises of peaceful compliance... but you've had to bear first hand the utter annihilation... the blood soaked wings... and iron mixing with his blonde hair turning it a blood red, and his skin stained for days from the blood.
You are his gem... his beloved... whom he and his sons cherish and adore! Even if you try to pull away nothing can pull you far away enough from him you always snap back to him because who wants to believe the angelic lord of blood is a monster? No one. Even if he does not hurt you... anyone else is fair game for the Sanguine Lord and his devoted sons... your monstrous step children... no one will save you from this outward fairytale.
Yandere Ferrus
His hand runs over the pod as there she has been for over 150 years... Ferrus feels some guilt over what he has done... but she is all he has as he presses his forehead against the glass coffin. She looks so peaceful and so etheral as she just lays there unaware of how the galaxy marches on without her. But Ferrus knows... he is here... he will always be here for her... his hand brushes against the pod.
She is locked away within his secret workshop with plans on how to remove the metal on his arms... he wants to feel that feathery touch she did on his hand just reading his palm, the way the corners of her eyes wrinkle in joy as she tells him that he'll have a long life. He remembers the way her fingers caressed the seam of his arms and it drove Ferrus to the limit.
He had asked her bluntly if she was willing to extend her life... and she had only said if he ordered her too... Ferrus could not force his will on her... even if he could just crush the life out of her... he could order her to live longer... to be with him! WHY was he cursed with her showing up at the START of the Crusade. And he had to meet her... she had to charm him with her humanity.
He remembers how fast her heart was beating as she laid on his bed naked as he allowed himself one concession... he loved her that night... he can still smell her... still hear her pleasured screams as his hips rocked against hers. He couldn't wait to explore her body with his actual hands... its why he injected her as she laid on his bed blissed out and put her where she is now. He worked on it lovingly for her... as for her... the last memories she has was herself under him screaming in that pleasured haze.
He kisses the glass. Smiling to himself as it wouldn't be much longer...
Author's Note: Inspired by this conversation. I'll be making one that takes place while Reader is alive as well, but the one where you aren't just got finished first. Enjoy.
Warnings: Sanguinius/Fem!Reader, Major character pseudo-death(Reader), Worship, i don't know consider this a sort of writing practice type thing for me
Guilliman finds himself having to hold the vile taste in his throat down, as he looks upon the scene in front of him.
...He remembers you.
He remembers the friendly smiles you gave him, and he remembers the smiles you would reserve just for Sanguinius. He always wondered what Sanguinius found worthwhile in being with you; In managing his legion, the expectations put on him by the entire galaxy, The demands of the Emperor, and a relationship with you. But then he would spot the way Sanguinius would look at you, like you were everything he had ever hoped for, and Guilliman would feel a twinge of something. He never quite figured out what it was.
And now you're here. Dead.
At least Guilliman would've wished as such, but instead you lay in an eternal state of unrest much like he was, not too long ago.
Sanguinius had once voiced to him that he was worried his sons would idolize you much like they did him. They were already beginning to towards the start of the Heresy; You'd become less of a person and more of a ideal, an extension of Sanguinius' own supposed anglicism. Sanguinius had found it distressing. He didn't want them to blindly follow something because of a holiness put on them. Sanguinius could handle that sort of thing, persuade those thoughts away and order them to stop, but you couldn't. You weren't meant to.
Guilliman had appreciated him confiding in him at the time, but hadn't offered much to soothe his worries. Perhaps that had been a mistake. He remembers exactly where they were, how the sky had looked. And each time he remembers it, he wants to yell at his past self to say something; To spurn some sort of action and prevent this.
"She still looks the same,"
The primarch mumbles, remembering your face in the last snapshot of his mind. Your skin had been pallor, you were falling ill, but you still soldiered on. You had to. While you had given most logistical and battlefield duties to Chapter Master Raldoron after Sanguinus' death, you still held significant sway in the chapters rituals and other types of decision-making. They wouldn't allow you to divert those duties, the anglicism they had put on you had begun to grow and grow even back then, wearing down on you like a disease.
Sanguinius' genesons had nothing less than the utmost respect for you, which Guilliman had watched morph into the thing that Sanguinius had feared the most. It wasn't his place to step in, so he never did.
The glass coffin which holds you does nothing to hide a single thing, displaying you and the delicate lace gown you lay in. It was the dress you'd worn when you married Sanguinius, and Guilliman doesn't know how to feel about it. The sleeves do well to hide the tubes and machinery that digs into your wrists, deep into your lifeless veins. They keep your body psudeo-alive, he presumes, to stay off decay.
However it seems it's drawing blood out, which he finds interesting. Though he doesn't have the time nor the desire to dwell on why such a thing would be needed.
"You remember The Mother Angel?"
Dante is more composed than most of the other Blood Angels, but Guilliman can still sense the awe in his voice from the primarch's eyes having touched their Mother Angel in life. He stands across from him, having decided to show Guilliman this sacred place.
"Her name, It was,"
Guilliman can't find himself to say it.
"I remember her, yes. Quite well."
Dante stands in reverence as if he's waiting for Guilliman to continue.
"I remember her voice, her face; I remember her wedding. I remember her putting Sanguinius' fallen feathers in her hair and dancing a fool." He clears his throat before continuing. "She lead the Blood Angels for a decade after Sanguinius. Then she fell ill. I always respected her tenacity and ability to lead a legion of Astartes despite her limitations."
Guilliman feels regret. He wishes he would've said more to Sanguinius when he'd voiced his worries, perhaps it would've spurred more action to prevent this outcome.
Sanguinius was the only one of them to find love, and look what happened; You got desecrated by it. Perhaps Corvus and Fulgrim were right to abandon the prospect all together. It seems to bring nothing but horror in the end. The only one of them to find love and that love got turned into it's own hideous creature, completely removed from what it had stood for.
His brow furrows, and he purses his lips in preparation to speak words that he just ends up swallowing.
"This, this is..."
Guilliman cuts himself off. He knows he shouldn't say these things in these chambers they call hallowed, in front of their Chapter Master. he needs Dante, he needs the Blood Angels more than he needs to protect a promise he never made in the first place.
"What, Lord Guilliman?" Dante urges him on, curiosity on his face.
"With all due respect, Master Dante," Guilliman looks to him, face stoic.
"If I were to say how I truly felt about all of this, I imagine you would no longer be willing to lend even a single man to assist the Ultramarines."
Dante looks at him confused, but doesn't show anger regarding his implications. Guilliman can see his lips twitch, eyes flickering down to your glass coffin for a moment.
But Dante just doesn't see it, and Guilliman knows it.
You've been like this for thousands of years, none of them see this as anything unusual. Generations of Blood Angels have been reared on you being this deity, the wife of an Angel, and there is no possible way to raise them out of that. What is done is done.
Guilliman is the only one seeing it as something wrong, as he is an outsider.
"Now, what is it you wished to discuss with me, Lord Dante?"
Guilliman changes the subject and turns away from the centerpiece of this cathedral, only allowed entry by the most elite of Blood Angels. He attempts to forget your body is even there, as there isn't a single thing he can do about it now.
He hopes Sanguinius will have mercy on him, next they meet.
YEEEESSS!! YEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSS!!! The delicious HORRIBLE angst!!! Of all the fuckery he had to wake up to, one of his cooler brotherโs sons exsanguinating his sorta-dead wife for several millennia, was probably not one heโd prepared himself for. I can only imagine the questions swirling around in his head (especially since he doesnโt know about the red thirst). Why tf could they not just have a funeral like normal people? Whyโd they have to put her in her wedding dress? Was she ACTUALLY dead when they put her in there? DID SHE EVEN AGREE TO THIS OR WERE THEY SO FAR GONE THEY FORCED THIS ON THEIR MOTHER WITHOUT EVEN ASKING?! But unfortunately as disturbed as he is byโฆ all of this, he cannot afford to lose the support of the Blood Angels rn so he canโt even do anything. Even their oldest member is young enough to have been indoctrinated into thinking their legion mother was basically a god, NONE of them could ever be convinced to Robouteโs side here. So he just has to let this goโฆ and hope really really hard she doesnโt miraculously get woken up like he and Lion did ๐ฌ
They donโt even know itโs a wedding dress either and if they did, they wouldnโt even know why thatโs such a horrible thing to do :โD
And yeah Guilliman was NOT ready for that when he went into the cathedral. My man had the horrified look on his face seeing poor Mrs.Sanguinus hooked up like a dead car before he had to stop because Dante was there ๐
Recently read Devastation of Baal and Lion, Son of the Forest, the idea of Sanguiniusโs wife returned similar to how Lion justโฆwoke up.
Somewhat based off the idea your fic of where Guilliman sees her in the glass coffin, except sheโs alive, like how Guilliman was in his pod. Perhaps the Blood Angels posted to guard her are absolutely flabbergasted upon seeing her awake and moving about, weakly and slowly mind you, the poor woman hasnโt moved in 10,000 years. News would spread of her awakening through the Legion, Guilliman would of course rush to see her since he last saw her in the pod. Lion isโฆLion about it or is happy in his own way. But most joyful would probably be Dante.
This poor man would be in tears, of joy and sadness. The Mother Angel has returned, heโd be having an audience with her constantly, confessing failures, doubts, wishing for death, or even mentioning that Sanguinius came to him in a vision. I picture her kind holding Dante during this, like his big ole head against her smaller form, like a mother comforting a child.
oh she would absolutely want to just give Dante a hug. He's been through so much and much him him probably reminds her of sanguinius, like how they both will run themselves ragged no matter the cost to themselves.
I'm sure Guilliman and Dante and even Lion would enjoy having someone outside of the astartes military structure to talk to that also understands, given her unique position.
Dante has seen her before, of course. There are numerous paintings of her, some painted by Sanguinius himself, along with statues and even a couple of recordings. The Great Angel loved to surround himself with the visage of his wife, finding solace in them when they were apart.
He's also seen her in her coffin. Not quite alive, not quite dead. Stuck inside an endless, dreamless sleep. How many times had he prayed in front of it. For guidance, for forgiveness, for just a single sign that he was doing at least something right. The Mother Angel had never answered him and Dante had always left with a feeling of disappointment lingering inside his heart.
She looks so different now that she is awake. The face is the same, of course, but the serene expression Dante had been so used to has been exchanged for one of deep sympathy and quiet understanding. Dante finds her to be breathtakingly beautiful like this, warm and radiant like the sun. And like any child seeking comfort from their mother, he curls up against her, face pressed against her shoulder that he wets with his tears. He is so much bigger than her, taller and broader like an astartes is supposed to be, but when her arms embrace him, Dante feels so impossibly small, like he could fit inside the palm of her hand.
The Mother Angel listens patiently as he bares his soul, admitting everything that he's kept locked up deep inside his heart out of fear that voicing it out loud would bring him nothing but ruin. She smooths out his hair, rubs calming circles on his back, murmurs soothingly whenever he trips and fumbles over his words.
Her fingers are still a bit cold, her eyes slightly bleary from her recent awakening. Dante wonders if she fully understands her situation, if she's aware of how much time has passed since she was put into stasis. It makes him feel guilty, for depending on her when she's the one that needs the most support. But he can't help himself. He needs a mother's embrace, an angel's grace.
Oh, Great Angel, please forgive your foolish son for his weakness.
How he's so desperate for her support and affection, feeling guilty for needing it when she's only just awoken but Dante is just SO broken he needs help putting the pieces back together...
I LOVE THIS, i love how he feels so small;;;;
girlboss? no, girl tired. @hangingheavenly - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
