Trans Discourse Sideblog

Just what the name implies. Xe/They/He

[therapatical]

somebody apparently tried to get the Wikipedia page for discrimination against trans men deleted entirely because of the use of the word "transandrophobia". y'all are part of a fucking extremist hate group at this point. it's pride month and the government is killing us and you're actively trying to destroy documentation about trans people's discrimination? really? how fucking evil do you have to be to do this shit?

can we finally admit that these anti-transmasc people are part of a hate group? can we finally address this fucking problem and acknowledge it exists?

[z1ish]

"Why do you talk so much about being intersex?"

Over 90% of parents of visibly intersex children opt for cosmetic surgery on their infants.

The ones that don't experience medical violence then, likely experience it as a teenager.

I didn't.

I am very rare in that I did not experience medical violence.

Why? Because I learned what intersexuality was as a young age, and I actively fought against what doctors wanted to do to me. All the way down to legal research on what medical care minors can be forced into. I remember walking into that doctor's appointment with the state law written down that proved that if I did not consent they could not do surgery.

That is why intersex activism is important. It saved me and it will save more.

[thefreewifi54]

#INTERSEX TALK MORE NOW AND PLEASE LISTEN

[closet-keys]

it's sad to me that cis people never apply their "loved one with a wanted-pregnancy" script to medical transition. like cis people often indicate they don't know how to react to hearing about medical transition, but a huge portion of that social script is directly applicable.

tell someone "congratulations!" tell them "I'm so happy for you. I know you've been trying for a really long time." ask them "do you need help with anything?" throw them a party with loved ones where you all give them some gifts in acknowledgement of how expensive it is. celebrate how far along they are. take photos with them so they have a record of being loved while their body changes. allow them to voice fears and doubts and anxieties about how it'll go, and reassure them that they'll get through the intense medical procedure coming up & you'll be there for support no matter what. let them tell you about the gross parts and laugh together. really listen to them when they talk about how amazing and profound it is that the human body can do this. share in their excitement for beginning a new stage of their life.

If there are complications, comfort them and help them navigate what's next. If they lose access suddenly due to finances or criminalization, treat it like a miscarriage and hold them while they grieve.

[clickrtrained-deactivated202512]

u have to love the tgirl always but especially when she is too tired all the time to make herself shave

[abalidoth]

Or, crucially, if she just doesn't want to. Acceptance of facial hair in transfems extends to those of us who have it willingly.

[exislential]

"trans men are raised to believe they are inherently pure on account of their sex" 1. thats not true, if you've ever met someone whose been perceived by society as a woman you would know we are absolutely not made to believe we are incapable of harm, quite the opposite actually, and 2. wait until you hear what theyre teaching kids assumed to be boys about gender superiority. if you can understand trans women aren't more likely to be misogynistic despite being taught that being "male" makes them superior, then you can understand trans men aren't more likely to be radfems

[transcyberism]

also just to throw this out there. people who were coercively gendered female as children are not raised to believe our bodies are "inherently pure" in any kind of immutable sense. we are raised to believe that we are capable of spoiling our purity very easily. we are taught that any kind of sexual activity defiles us. we are taught that too much makeup or skirts too short defile us. we are taught that there is a part of our genitals that is designed to rupture like a fucking freshness seal and let everyone know that we are no longer pure the moment we put anything inside, sometimes even including tampons.

purity is not used as a way to delineate us as superior to anyone. impurity is used as a cudgel to threaten us with. we are taught that we are valueless if we don't constantly defend our supposed purity - that our worth as commodities and our desirability as people is entirely dependent on it. we are taught that if we aren't pure then we are effectively subhuman.

and I say this all in present tense despite no longer identifying as a woman because we are also told that testosterone and gender transition defiles us too. we have to begin to unlearn that to even consider transitioning.

[tboy-cock]

everybody say thank you to the brave trans men who post their post op phallo/meta dicks online from both the beginning and the ends of their procedures in order to give us pre op trans people understanding of what these surgeries actually are despite the raging transandrophobia surrounding penis creating bottom surgery

[windwardstar]

And everybody say thank you to the brave enben who post their post op phallo/meta dicks online from both the beginning and the ends of their procedures in order to give us pre op trans people understanding of what these surgeries actually are despite the raging transandrophobia and exorsexism surrounding penis creating bottom surgery

[planetarytransformation]

so many of the transfems i know spent their time pre-transition performing a kind of lifelong exercise in self-deprivation, the goal of which was to find out exactly how little a person needed to live. they starved themselves, dressed carelessly, shunned friends, and hollowed themselves out so as not to be burdens on anyone but themselves.

i see it now, too, in the girls around me. i'll ask if they want care – a home-cooked meal, relaxed company, sex without the expectation of reciprocation – and they say no, no, thank you, i don't need it; what would you like, what do you want, because in their head they're still doing that awful calculus, still training themselves to disappear in the eyes of the people around them.

i don't think i'd have died without transition – not in the conventional sense, at least – but to take that leap, i had to stop thinking of myself as a human experiment in fuel-efficient living and start nurturing the anemic, atrophied flame of desire in my heart. i had to learn to eat well, to exercise, to style myself beautiful, but harder than that, i had to learn to ask the people around me to work on my behalf in order to enrich my life and give me the things i wanted.

and i did it; i learned. and it was agony, but courage is a muscle you can train, and every day i get better at accepting gifts with the hungry gratitude i never learned in my years and years as a sad, scared, lonely boy.

so be patient with the trans girls in your life. better than that: be proactive, attentive, generous; be forceful, if you have to, and learn to distinguish real discomfort from the terrified reflex of self-denial that so many of us once learned to rely on.

and if you are so lucky as to love a trans girl, you must insist upon her. you must insist upon her happiness, her comfort, her pleasure, and her rest, because she may still not yet know how to make those demands for herself. if you can devote any amount of energy to becoming an engine that nurtures the flame of even a single tgirl then there is a place for you in trans heaven, which as far as i'm concerned is the only one worth going to

[planetarytransformation]

i love this fucking post. just thousands of deeply and profoundly wounded people in the notes recognizing their past and present selves in a picture of self-abnegation, ignorance, and despair. some are weary, some are shocked, some are hopeful; all have tried at some point to make themselves disappear. they failed, and must now work thanklessly to undo a lifetime of shame and starvation in favor of the happiness, abundance, and pleasure which is their birthright.

so many of my siblings, especially those who are awaiting or beginning transition, step into transgender life as fragile, apathetic beings who have spent their lives being coerced, beaten, and tricked into winnowing themselves to nothing, doing the work of the murderers for them, because they have been taught to believe that trans people deserve to live suspended, half-dead lives as punishment for their abhorrence.

they do not. you do not.

if you put your thoughts in the tags or the notes on this post, whether they were hopeful, despairing, reminiscent, or terrified, know that i have read it, and i love you. keep fighting.

[stray-leopard]

No fucking way. This post is by a cisgender woman by the way. But are we seriously trying to claim using the term 'exorsexist' is bad. What the fuck girlypop.

I need every pericis person to shut the fuck up forever actually jfc.

[sunbeamedskies]

“Noa Argamani was treated well!”

She was kept as a hostage slave in a wealthy family’s apartment, forced to clean it whenever they knocked without warning, for EIGHT MONTHS. Just because they fed her does not mean she wasn’t a hostage and a slave. Her mother also has terminal cancer and was afraid she was never going to see her again.

If you start justifying human rights abuses against women, Jews, and Asians (she is half Chinese) because they are Israeli, you were never against antisemitism, misogyny, or wanted to stop Asian hate.

You can support both Palestinian and Israeli civilian lives.

[nazarenefedayeen]

lmao based, make the zionists work off the debt from occupation.

[tamamita]

Israelis can't even treat their own hostages well.

[fugayyyku]

It is absolutely absurd to compare cleaning an apartment to the provable rape and torture Palestinians suffer in captivity. There were absolutely NO human rights abuses in captivity, cleaning your surroundings a completely accepted form of contribution from a prisoner, and that absolutely matters. She was kidnapped as political leverage but treated with a dignity of conduct Israel cannot claim, and it absolutely matters to the context of the occupation and resistance.

You can admit something would be horrific to go through without calling it human rights abuses. That term matters. And it matters specifically in that her human rights were not violated while Palestinians in Israeli captivity rights were and are being violated.

[sunbeamedskies]

Many Israeli women were raped by Hamas. Many were murdered by Hamas. Most hostages were physically and emotionally tortured and kept underground for over a year. Being a slave in any capacity is a human rights violation. BEING KIDNAPPED AND TAKEN AS A HOSTAGE IS A HUMAN RIGHTS VIOLATION.

Also- where in this post did I EVER claim Palestinians were somehow not abused too? Where in this post did I ever try to pit Palestinian and Israeli victims of torture against each other? Oh that’s right- that was a suffering competition you made up.

Your brain has been conditioned to see Israelis as subhuman monsters and to take every mention of Israeli pain as a slight against Palestinians. Talking about Israeli pain does not take away from Palestinian pain. Talking about Palestinian pain does not take away from Israeli pain. Both forms of suffering are horrific.

Please de-tankiefy your mindset and see the world in more than black and white.

[dazeylily]

There truly isn't.

then why are there so many transmisogynists in the tag? this is like saying if I believe men deserve rights I agree with MRAs

[dazeylily]

oh. you got a lot going on huh

[velvetvexations]

why do yall always immediately leap to misgendering me or accusing me of being "half-detransitioned" or whatever

I really don't have a lot going on, it's all very straight-forward, but I have that big disclaimer there because yall are like this and will jump on my back about it if I don't. Is it me having kinks that bothers you? Can you explain to me what's wrong about using different words I like for myself? Or is it that you think every trans woman who disagrees with you is the type that calls themselves male, which must mean it's all self-loathing transfems who don't accept themselves as Trve Wymyn? Because there are plenty of trans women on my side of this and no one else does that, I am wholly unique in that regard.

I am, currently, dealing with actual TERFs, unlike every single one of you who I'm convinced barely knows what a TERF is much less has ever gotten into a conflict with them, so I shouldn't waste my time with people who think the praxis that'll end transmisogyny is endless bitching about trans men, but remember in ten years that I made an effort to educate you on what real transfeminism looks like, and you responded by implying my identity as a transfem was invalid.

[alvie-pines]

oh nooo she has a complicated gender label? the trans person has a complicated relationship with gender? should we have an intervention? should we invite jk rowling

on a more serious note, using a trans person's gender identity to discredit their opinions is extremely low-hanging fruit. and also transphobic. so lets not do that

[velvetvexations]

Isn't it wild how they're always like "ugh those th***ab fagdykes don't know what a REAL gender complexity is" and then do this?

[genderqueerdykes]

assuming things about people just by how they look & present is profiling. you really should be concerned about the amount of people who are willing to profile strangers that read as cishet men and cishet couples to them. it doesn't matter if someone "reads" as a cishet man or a cishet couple to you, making the assumption that they are (and that they're inherently dangerous because of it) is literally profiling strangers. if you don't want it done to you, don't do it to anyone else. profiling people does not keep you "safe", it makes you dangerous.

[kdinjenzen]

I’ve shared this bit of advice before, but it’s worth sharing again.

I am almost 8 years on HRT and before I even started taking estrogen, spiro, or progesterone, my doctor looked me in the eyes and asked a very important question…

She asked: “Do you want big boobs?”

I said yes, I wanted something that matched my frame.

She immediately told me: “Then do not go on a diet, maintain your fat, because your body will be using that and whatever you’re eating to build up your breasts and other features.”

And bless her because I’m rocking an H Cup these days.

So my trans girlies who are just starting out, I offer that bit of advice to you as well.

[transmechanicus]

This is the first time i’ve seen a pro-trans poster in a long time and i hope whoever put it up is having a good day, it made me feel a little less alone.

Hamilton, New Zealand

[our-queer-experience]

i love trans men who wear crust pants i love trans men who talk loudly i love trans men who smell i love short trans men i love trans men who work out i love trans men who dye their hair i love gay trans men i love masculine trans men. i love trans men who have high voices i love trans men who wear makeup i love trans men who wear skirts i love trans men who have soft voices i love ‘sickly’ trans men i love trans men who are straight i love trans men who go stealth i love trans men who don’t pass. i fucking love all trans men and fuck people who don’t agree.

[skluug]

a woman being feminine is right-wing coded which is masculine coded. a woman being masculine is left-wing coded which is feminine coded. this disproves the existence of women

[kittenscratches]

"tboys" if you automatically refer to transmascs and trans men like this, I don't trust you to be normal about them.

"harassing trans women and spousing misogynistic views" do you mean talking about their oppression with a word you don't like, and telling trans women (notice how they didn't say tgirls! Wow!) that they shouldn't speak over transmascs and trans men about their own oppression and experiences? Because that's usually what people mean when they say this without any evidence.

"after years of gaming the addon in their favour" ????? This is just false ???? How do you even do that? Where is the evidence for this?

"now all of a sudden shinigami eyes is just like ninety ninety four by jorjor wells" [translation: nineteen eighty four (1984) by George Orwell]. Or you mean. Intersex people have increasingly been marked red for talking about their own experiences in a surge of intersexism and transmascs have been standing with them because that's, like, what allyship is supposed to be.

Be so fucking for real right now.

[catboybiologist]

The cis public at large has no fucking clue that HRT even does anything

[estrogenesis-evangelion]

for adults it's a useless placebo that freaks only take to flatter their perverse vanity, but for kids it's instantaneous transformation poison that ruins your body utterly & irrevocably on dose #1

[catboybiologist]

Oh fuck you're right lemme just uuuhhh base my entire economic voting strategy around this

[catboybiologist]

I'm worried if we give too many of those whore moans to adults the price of eggs will go up