Richard The Gachapon

She/Him I’ve got Tits for Eyes Can be seen on Dan and Phil’s Hard Launch Podcast

[golfkinky]

Honestly I’m impressed.

[purpurussy]

[hardlaunchrichard]

Wait guys wait — look closer… is that…

Holy shit it’s—

I̵̗͗t̴̨̼͋̑͐ ̶̻̞͊̅i̸̘̤͖͗͛͋S̸̼̒ ̴̥̾i̸͇̥̖̓,̸̙̫̀ ̴̖̥́̈͝Ŕ̵͇͔͖į̷̫́͒̕C̶͇̜̹̅h̷̲͒A̴͎͈̗͂r̸̨̥̦̅d̶̞̝͒

[hauntedmanuscripts]

New addition to Date Everything?

She is the main character of Hard Launch!

[9ine9ine9ine6ix]

YESSSS WERE CREATING RICHARDS AT NEVER BEFORE SEEN RATES THIS ONE IS AWESOME TOO THIS IS SO COOL I LOVE THIS COMMUNITY SO MUCH

[bobbibitybob]

No One Does it Like She/Her Richard💅✨

[hardlaunchrichard]

Never stop slaying queen. 👸

I couldn’t even if I tried

[hardlaunchrichard]

Shhhhhhhhh I’m sleeping

[hardlaunchrichard]

Would asking why they were late to the radio show be an appropriate ball topic to submit to be inserted into you

I’m not Dan or Phil obviously, just a receptacle for balls and podcasts topics, so I can’t say for certain what they would find appropriate or not, but I think offense risk is low here.

If the answer is boring or they don’t want to say, they simply won’t put it inside me.

[hardlaunchrichard]

[hardlaunchrichard]

Hello there Richard,

it’s the IRS and I was wondering how much taxes u paid in 2025 uwu?

Oh!!!! The IRS!!! Wow - hah - long time no… see. If you’ll excuse me I just have to—

[hardlaunchrichard]

I know you've sworn secrecy and can't let us know but what are some options for "THE TOPIC" dan doesn't want to talk about (you know, which Phil took an hour to write)- The suspense is killing me, Richard

Listen I really can’t say. I’m under contract here.

But you know….. I think we ALL wanna revisit Sam the Surfer in this new era.

[hardlaunchrichard]

Don’t talk to me or my gay dad ever again

- Richard

[spiderinthecupboard-deactivated]

Dan is literally showing Dick and balls in this video

[hardlaunchrichard]

And don’t forget the titty eyes

[hardlaunchrichard]

Don’t talk to me or my gay dad ever again

- Richard

[hardlaunchrichard]

I feel like you’d watch drag race

Since season one.

I’m a glamazon bitch, ready for the runway

[hardlaunchrichard]

What phousehold objects are you friends with? (Pheal, golden pig, Phil’s cursed pot etc)

I was only in the phouse a short time before being transferred to the phasement, but Golden Pig and I are colleagues since he’s down here with me.

The Pheal? Love phem. We do lunch on occasion.

Phil’s Pot has a bit of a chip on his shoulder, or around his rim as it were. (That’s a little bit of object humor for you.)

And then me and the Phitchen Oven have kind of an on and off thing going on. It’s complicated.

[hardlaunchrichard]

Phwoah dads, hello and welcome to the phamily, phummina phummina! It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance *sexy end screen dance*

- @phannie-elvis

[hardlaunchrichard]

You're very beautiful. Can i take you out for coffee? 🥺

Omg

Im ready to be swept off my wheels