met my soulmate/best friend/future husband
bought my first car (2010 prius who is GORG)
moved out of my abusive home
went no contact with my family
my ex stalks me for five months after breaking up with me
met my in-laws and gained parents, 4 brothers and a grandma
got an apt with my name on the lease
lived w my in laws for a week bc said apt was bug invested..
started working at a daycare
left daycare after a month bc the physical pain it put me in caused me to be physically paralyzed for 2 weeks..
got a barista job that had me fall in love with coffee and now i have a new hobby!!
witnessed verbal abuse my manager was the perpetrator of..
made connections with my coworkers
supported my family through grief (inlaw)
found out my dad left my mom (& technically my 16 yr old brother) and moved to florida and was filing for divorce
turned 20 and celebrated my bday w/out my bio family for the first time
had my first healthy and happy thanksgiving
got engaged with my fiance and our family all together (baby brother wouldnt let me go the whole time hes so cute)
celebrated christmas with everyone and had a ball (and was also severely stressed bc holidays are a trigger)
realized my mom was a lot worse than i thought
work began to get far more abusive and i was crying daily
started dealing with worsening symptoms; chest pain, joint pain, dizziness. was still managable.
got frozen in my apt for a week
started having daily low grade fevers
got sick with the flu for 2 weeks
my health took an immediate downward spiral
started to become unable to participate at work, i was nearly passing out daily and could barely breathe with how tight my chest got
MY MANAGER GOT FIRED FOR FAVORTISM?? AND I GOT A NEW ONE IN THE SAME DAY??
my new manager started treating me poorly bc im disabled..
new manager announces shes pregnant..
i quit my job and we become single income bc i can no longer feed myself without assistance (i can now, ive improved!)
find out my mom was cheating on my dad,, and is dating a man who looks like my uncle. her brother.
i start trauma therapy with my therapist!!
i find out my abuse was 10x worse than i thought
i watch tadc finale and i cry for an hour because of jax's backstory!
anyways i would say it gets better but i know most people would not feel that way if they were me! it seems like a lot, and it really is. however in many ways my life has truly improved in small ways. I eat now, im at a healthy weight, i love my body, i have a wonderful fiance who cares for me deeply and has taken on an additional caregiver role for me. im out of the abusive home that wrecked me and i am safe. despite all of the terrible shit, i am okay and i will be okay.
you are okay and you will be okay, i promise. there is an end within sight.