HCer

33/M/TX->ND, burned-out HCer in recovery, defector to the NC, I mean gendisc, OG neoboards shitposter, veteran of the autospammer wars, once made an actual HC tribute shirt, this place is a freakshow, i respect literally all of you people

[hcer]

PSA

"Weary" means "tired" and rhymes with "theory"

"Wary" means "cautious" and rhymes with "scary"

[hcer]

This is the ideal text editor. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.

echo '#!/usr/bin/perl -w' > hello.pl && sed -zri -e '1s,(#!/(.)(.)(.)/.(.)./.(.)(.). ..),\1\n\2\3\6 \3t\4\5ct;,' -e '1,2s,(#!/.{2}(.)/.(.)(.)/(.)(.).(.) .(.))\n(.{3} .{6};),\1\n\9\np\2\3\4t "h\6\7\7o \8o\2\7d\\n";,' hello.pl && echo && cat hello.pl && echo && perl hello.pl

[hcer]

why we can't have nice things

y'all motherfuckers who post on the "Existing/Returning Players" board bitching about how you can't remember the email address to your old Neopets account need to quit reporting me after I search the old Neopets database dump for you and send you your own shit, i'm starting to run out of aged accounts

douche

[hcer]

Throwback

to the time I made my roommates listen to some clown from China ramble at the International Court of Justice at The Hague for like three hours because I had dropped some acid and the guy was reciting a bunch of international treaties about the definition of crime against humanity so slowly and meticulously that I became convinced China was about to declare war on Israel to stop the genocide (probably involving nukes)

[hcer]

Contenido + contexto: Un hispanohablante dice, en ingles imperfecto, que El trata de abstener de la I.A. La respuesta, resultante mayormente del esfuerzo por escribir algo entendible de alguien que si mismo tiene español imperfecto, se parece algun tanto poetico casí por casualidad. Qué opinas? Mirad: Los flores del campo se han imitado una otra, hasta que solo en las faltas y fealdades de la mala hierba quede la belleza

[hcer]

bad AI writing bingo

[depsidase]

[hcer]

I know one that is in the Bible though (-:

"Verily I say unto you, inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these My brethren, ye have done it unto Me." (https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%2025%3A31-46&version=KJ21)

It gets better yet, because right after that line is the part where God tells the people he wasn't talking to in the first part to fuck off and go to hell because he knows about all the times they could have fed, sheltered, clothed, healed, or comforted someone in need and chose not to, and he takes all of them personally

Funnily enough, for some reason -- or maybe for no reason, perhaps it's a coincidence -- I'm presented with far more opportunities to remind people of this one when they're being hypocrites about it than any other, by a long shot. Sometimes the context calls for the one about praying in private and not making a big performative show of it. Sometimes it calls for a micro-TED talk about how that one "faith, hope, and love (and the greatest of them is love)" bit more accurately says "faith, hope, and charity" (and then a sidebar about "charity" as "charitableness"). Sometimes it calls for no particular verse, but rather a reminder that being condescending in the name of God makes you a Pharisee. But this one is relevant so frequently I've seriously considered making signs to mount below the ones that tell drivers not to give money to people.

[hcer]

In progress: the best spontaneously coordinated prank in history

[hcer]

tina u fat

[hcer]

(user430580) @OakBot Please tell me all the keywords of the Java language.

(OakBot) :66365448 Sure! Here are the keywords defined in the Java programming language:

abstract continue for new switch assert default goto package synchronized boolean do if private this break double implements protected throw byte else import public throws case enum instanceof return transient catch extends int short try char final interface static void class finally long strictfp volatile const float native super while

These keywords are reserved and have special meanings in the Java language, which you cannot use as identifiers (like variable names, class names, etc.). Happy coding!

public void throws if throw new try if else do return true

catch this class int while float short enum interface instanceof import

abstract package with byte sealed exports private for null yield

switch case break when default var permits double final char

strictfp const synchronized static volatile provides

transitive record extends transient requires opens

boolean assert goto implements long continue

super native, finally, protected; these words are key

fix'd

[hcer]

speech to text refused to recognize "brisket" until i said it properly with southern-flavored vowels

[hcer]

dust bunnies, eyes wide open

Dawn star flares on disk of night, Where darkness binds them closer than light.

There is no safety this side of the grave; Grok ye not why mome raths outgrabe?

They twig all good things pass away, Yet burn and rave at close of day.

Don't start anything you're not prepared to finish,

https://everything2.com/title/dust+bunnies,+eyes+wide+open

[hcer]

Neoboardese

[hcer]

Never Gonna Live Forever

[hcer]

When you're at the rave but you just want to go home and play NOLF

[hcer]

Dear Diary

Today, I attempted to rewatch Centaurworld

I made it almost 10 minutes

[hcer]

Important note

The free wine carrier bags at Kroger are not for putting sushi rolls in.

Just because the sushi rolls at Kroger fit perfectly into the slots of the free wine carrier bags that are also at Kroger does not mean that you should put the sushi rolls into the wine carrier.

The wine carrier is for wine and not for sushi rolls and you wouldn't want to misuse the wine carriers by putting the incorrect items in them, or tying knots in the handles or anything like that.

After all, if you were to put the sushi rolls in the wine carrier instead of placing them properly in a shopping cart until purchase is complete, it might slip your mind that they were in there.

You might space out, get distracted, and end up wandering around through the far end of the store where the pharmacy is.

Then if anyone should happen to take notice of you, it might appear as if you were merely coming from getting stuff at the pharmacy counter, and that it makes sense for you to be breezing through, especially if you already had the wine carrier when you came in and, in a tragic freak accident of fate, it looked like it already had stuff in it.

So they might not get the chance to help you out by reminding you to buy the sushi you went there for in the first place.

And that would be terrible.

Then you might have to go back later to get the sushi you forgot.

What a pain in the ass!

So don't do that!

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.