hi hi howdy!!! my name is kirby (she/her) and i'm so happy i get to introduce you all to miss alice in wonderland, hong aerin !! a soft and sweet girl suffering in silence, fundamentally dissatisfied with herself and the way her life is going but fuck it we ball.
raised in china for part of her childhood and attending an international school, she has a bit of a different experience she can bring to the table! she's a classically trained dancer, struggling to make the transition to dancing like an idol. check out her detailed profile here, her history here, and wanted connections ( coming soon ) here!! below the cut you can find some very brief information & trivia about her. i can't wait to plot something with you all, mwah!!
: ฬฬโ for the first 10 years of her life, aerin was raised by her single father in beijing, china. they eventually moved to south korea to live with her grandmother.
: ฬฬโ she's been doing ballet since she was 5 years old, starting at a dance school in china then continuing once they went back to korea,
: ฬฬโ aerin is a closeted lesbian, having only come out to her grandmother prior to becoming a trainee. she hasn't said anything to her father as they've grown apart as she got older.
: ฬฬโ aerin has no desire to become an idol, her dream is to become a teacher. should this fail for her, she plans to return to china and teach at the school she used to attend.
as much as doyeon would like to point out how red aerin is becoming; an obvious tone in contrast to her rather white, silky skin tone, she holds herself back from pointing the obvious. it's rather cute as well that the other trainee is doing her best in hiding it.
"well, not all trainees." she emphasizes which were partly true. there were some doyeon casually throws in a pick up line or two, but when they don't reciprocate to it, she moves on to casual conversations. some others play the game as much as she did, and it becomes a cycle of them flirting with one another. others like aerin herself, showed more reaction than throwing an equally awful pick up line and hence sparks her flirtatious nature more. perhaps, if she had been honest, she may have flirted with plenty. but not all.
perhaps there is some sort of anticipation and expectations that aerin has of doyeon and she isn't sure if that would be good. her flirtatious persona has more or less caused both good and bad outcomes towards her, and with aerin, she had hoped it wouldn't lead to anything bad. "well, some really. not all. sometimes they play along with me, but other times they really just smack me and we move along," doyeon confesses with the truth and hopefully it doesn't sound like an excuse to aerin.
Aerin, ignoring the way her stomach twisted and her heart sank, found herself laughing openly at how upfront and open Doyeon was about her flirtatious tendencies. It hurt a bit to not be special -- as much as Aerin wanted to deny it, a crush was blooming somewhere in her heart. It's stupid, she knows that, and even if she did mean something more to Doyeon they're both soon to be idols. There's nothing that could come of it.
"Maybe I should start smacking you and send you on your way," Aerin joked, the smile on her face growing bigger. Her own hopefully romantic feelings aside, she liked talking to Doyeon. She'd consider them to be friends even, and it wasn't like she had a long list of those. It meant something to her to have people by her side, and if she had to put her feelings aside to keep that friendship she wouldn't hesitate. She was used to it.
Aerin let out another giggle and nudged Doyeon's arm. "But I like having you around, so I won't," Her tone was light and playful, as she really did mean what she said. As long as she had Doyeon around, she'd be happy. Didn't matter how. "Be thankful I play along."
โฅ date: late february 2023
โฅ featuring: kim jihye
โฅ word count: 554*
HONG AERIN was not a leader. She knew that, had always known that, so of course she'd assume that the staff at Kiss knew that.
The way her face paled and her trained polite smile fell the second she was announced the leader and choreographer, she was absolutely sure they knew now. But she didn't have time to worry, no time to doubt herself. She had a week to put something together and teach it, and positions to assign...
The choreography was easy enough -- as easy as anything like this could be, she supposed. Locking herself in one of the training rooms, letting the instrumental given to them play on repeat. Feeling the music vibrate through every inch of her body from head to toe, and moving where it took her until she couldn't move anymore.
Her notebook, covered in various stickers and doodles, had pages upon pages filled with notes on what move goes where and how it should go. Without the lyrics given to her, she had to focus on the way the music made her feel which was her area of expertise. Dancing calmed her, and with the calm in her mind, she thought hard about the positions she had to assign.
HONG AERIN | She thought about herself first. Maybe it wasn't proper leader etiquette to consider herself first, but who did she know better than herself? The natural decision is to give herself MAIN DANCE. She's the choreographer, she'd know it best. She can sing, sure, but she couldn't be 1000% sure she'd be able to remain stable enough vocally to justify a vocal position, especially a main. With a firm nod, she made a note in the corner of her notebook page. The easy parts were done. Now comes the tough stuff.
KIM JIHYE | Jihye was probably the trainee Aerin was most familiar with. She knew her skillset, and she knew her flaws. Tapping her pen against her chin, seated cross legged on the practice room floor, Aerin examined the choreo she'd finalized already. Jihye wasn't a confident dancer. She arguably had the skill, but she focused on her vocal ability instead. That wasn't a bad thing by a long shot, but the various floor moves and quick position changes that Aerin had put in place would definitely leave anyone out of breath. If they needed a main vocal, they needed to remain as stable as possible.
Aerin sighed and tightened her long brain ponytail that had loosened with her long dance session. Her lingering anxieties were itching at her brain, but who else would she pick? With a final grunt, she scribbled next to her name and position. KIM JIHYE, MAIN VOCAL + VISUAL. Jihye specifically requested the visual position, and it was the least of Aerin's worries who got it. The quicker it was given away, the easier she had it.
As far as what the other's would receive position wise, she hadn't heard from them about what they'd even want. Could she hold auditions for the final positions? It would make sense for dancers at least, if she passed on the choreography notes she had. So much to do, so little time and direction. For now, she presumed she should pass along the information to Jihye and go back to what she did best -- dance.
Jihye was a girl who knew what she wanted. She had been ambitious and goal oriented for years, and now, with debut in sight, there wasnโt anything standing in her way.
Except for maybe Aerin.
Aerin was a bit of an enigma to Jihye. Not that she herself was a difficult person to understand, but Jihye just couldnโt figure out how she felt about the other. There was a bit of admiration but also trepidation, an uncertainty in the otherโs abilities. But, now that Aerin was designated leader for the time being and was calling the shots for positions, Jihye had a bit of self humbling to do.
Play nice. Those words had been on repeat in her head since she knew debut preparations were starting for her. The last thing she needed to do right now was make enemies. well, make more enemies than she had already. She took a deep breath, swallowed her pride, and approached her โleaderโ.
โHello,โ she said, a bit of formality in her tone that wasnโt there the last time they spoke.ย โI know this is your choice what positions we all receive, but Iโd like to advocate for myself to be the main vocalist and visual.โ She held herself with her shoulders back, confident, but kept her chin level, not arrogantly.ย โMy vocals and visuals are where my strengths lie, like you with your dancing and performing.โ Jihye hoped a compliment would help her cause, especially with how rare Kim Jihye compliments were.
Leadership was not something that Aerin ever saw herself as capable of. In fact, she tried her hardest to fade into the background when the roles were being handed out for the debut preparations -- avoiding eye contact like a child in class afraid of being called on. It didn't help clearly and here she was -- leader and in charge of choreography. Going from no responsibility to nearly the largest amount of responsibility left her brain spinning. It didn't help she had to spend her days not only working the choreo and learning the lyrics, but also ducking and dodging those hounding her about what positions they did or didn't deserve.
Unfortunately, she couldn't dodge Jihye. The girl was undeniably talented and in Aerin's opinion, more than capable of being the leader in her place. Why the role didn't go to her had Aerin perplexed, but she tried to gather her confidence and put on a neutral face that betrayed the chaos in her heart.
"Ah, hello, Jihye-ssi. I figured you'd ask for that position. I've heard you sing, you're wonderful," Starting off as complimentary as possible, Aerin tried to calm herself and find her nerve. If they thought she was the best choice for leader, she'd have to act like it. "i understand vocals are part of your strengths, however before I give you that position I want to know you can pull off a good performance."
Aerin cleared her throat and straighten her back, her gaze growing intense. "My choreography won't be easy, and I don't plan on making your parts simple. I want to know you can sing well even when you're following the choreo." There wasn't a lot that Aerin was confident in, but her dancing and her ability to put on a show was absolutely the biggest things. She would never make a performance simple, and undermine her ability to accommodate someone else's lack of talent. Jihye would not be an exception.
the reactions that aerin gives highly amuses doyeon for most parts, but the other being that the younger trainee is indeed very cute and endearing. she has her accounts of people being mad at doyeon over her rather mischievous and flirtatious attempts but aerin takes it well and had never once got mad. this had then motivated her to flirt at every chance given when she sees the other trainee.
doyeon only grins at the remarks she's given, "hm, let them think of that!" she comments before following up with another sneaky pick up. "can i guess your mbti..?" she asks, pretending to ponder on it as she made a thinking gesture by tapping her forefinger to her temple before answering as the raven haired looks at the younger trainee for a reaction.
"it's gotta be mbti cutie right?" doyeon laughs over her own reply.
Aerin couldn't do anything to stop the way her face just go more and more red. It was almost torture the way her heart pounded in her chest. She could only hope that Doyeon didn't notice.
"Do you flirt with all the trainees like this?" Aerin tried to keep her voice teasing and light, but the weight of her question kept her sounding strained. She was sure she knew the answer -- Doyeon seemed to just have a teasing personality -- but she loved feeling special. Like she really meant those words and compliments specifically for Aerin.
The answer was likely no, she knew that, but still. Aerin glanced over at Doyeon, trying to read her face and work out the answer herself. Half hopeful, half terrified. "I mean, do you? I'm sure they're much meaner in how they respond than I am." A nervous smile made it's way onto her lips and she tried to appear like she wasn't holding onto every word.
โLetโs, I would love to.โ A start was a start, he thought. Apprehensive as Haneul was, Aerin seemed in good spirits and that made him ease into having a day with her.ย Had he been more confident, Haneul would have had more to say.ย
He was fretting over details, what to say, what not to say when there was much entailed. โA walk sounds nice. I suppose, um, Iโll follow your lead...โ He said, traveling to her side to press forward. His tone finally grew lighter as well,ย โWell, how about you tell me exciting news? Best way of getting to know someone.โ There was so much happening these days, he wondered then if Aerin was part of the group taking on new challenges.ย
Aerin's face brightened and the smile that was previously strained turned bright, her whole face showing the sheer amount of relief she felt. It was truly a shot in the dark offer and she wasn't sure what she'd do if it was rejected ... likely nothing, but being saved from the humiliation of it was appreciated.
"Yes! I can lead the way. Going on walks are how I destress these days." Aerin nodded firmly before awkwardly attempting to walk a bit faster to make it seem like she knows where she's headed. She listened intently, the shock of having gotten this far made her terrified to somehow mess up the start to their bond. "Oh! Yes! I am preparing to debut now, which is... exciting."
Aerin's words drifted off at the mention of her debut and couldn't resist the urge to frown. It was a strange response, she was sure, but part of her felt comfortable expressing that to someone like Hanuel. Someone who seemed so calm all the time, the complete opposite of her nervous energy. "Could I... be honest for a moment?" The question was rhetorical, as she continued to speak.
"If I'm being honest, I'm more worried than excited. I don't... I'm not sure this is what I want to do, you know? Being an idol is a big commitment and you can't be sure you'll succeed." Aerin bit her lip and felt the familiar anxiety bubbling up in her chest. "Do you feel that way sometimes? I figure you don't you seem so ... sure." She glanced up at Haneul's face and attempted to find something familiar in it. Something like the deep fear and insecurity on her own.
"I guess I shouldn't complain -- so many people want this spot. It's just that I get so worried that I'm making a mistake and I'll drag so many people with me." Aerin's eyebrows furrowed before she straightened a bit and tried to smile. "I'm sorry, I'm unloading all my anxiety onto you. I'm just ... yeah."
โLetโs, I would love to.โ A start was a start, he thought. Apprehensive as Haneul was, Aerin seemed in good spirits and that made him ease into having a day with her.ย Had he been more confident, Haneul would have had more to say.ย
He was fretting over details, what to say, what not to say when there was much entailed. โA walk sounds nice. I suppose, um, Iโll follow your lead...โ He said, traveling to her side to press forward. His tone finally grew lighter as well,ย โWell, how about you tell me exciting news? Best way of getting to know someone.โ There was so much happening these days, he wondered then if Aerin was part of the group taking on new challenges.ย
Aerin's face brightened and the smile that was previously strained turned bright, her whole face showing the sheer amount of relief she felt. It was truly a shot in the dark offer and she wasn't sure what she'd do if it was rejected ... likely nothing, but being saved from the humiliation of it was appreciated.
"Yes! I can lead the way. Going on walks are how I destress these days." Aerin nodded firmly before awkwardly attempting to walk a bit faster to make it seem like she knows where she's headed. She listened intently, the shock of having gotten this far made her terrified to somehow mess up the start to their bond. "Oh! Yes! I am preparing to debut now, which is... exciting."
Aerin's words drifted off at the mention of her debut and couldn't resist the urge to frown. It was a strange response, she was sure, but part of her felt comfortable expressing that to someone like Hanuel. Someone who seemed so calm all the time, the complete opposite of her nervous energy. "Could I... be honest for a moment?" The question was rhetorical, as she continued to speak.
"If I'm being honest, I'm more worried than excited. I don't... I'm not sure this is what I want to do, you know? Being an idol is a big commitment and you can't be sure you'll succeed." Aerin bit her lip and felt the familiar anxiety bubbling up in her chest. "Do you feel that way sometimes? I figure you don't you seem so ... sure." She glanced up at Haneul's face and attempted to find something familiar in it. Something like the deep fear and insecurity on her own.
"I guess I shouldn't complain -- so many people want this spot. It's just that I get so worried that I'm making a mistake and I'll drag so many people with me." Aerin's eyebrows furrowed before she straightened a bit and tried to smile. "I'm sorry, I'm unloading all my anxiety onto you. I'm just ... yeah."
Life had taught her to jump into things radically, that acclimating would come next. It was human nature to shift and change to best suit their environment, from jumping into cold pools to settling in a foreign country to learn their language; so many people had used this trait to meet their needs and achieve their goals that it seemed foolish not to use it herself.
Except her sudden immersion wasn't surrounded by bubbles that raced to the surface, and it didn't include a harmony of indecipherable chatter. It was simple, plain, involving only herself, a practice room, and a pilates session in which she'd get to relax her body and mind from all the exciting new changes. Except that her plan to unwind and bask in a rare moment of solitude was interrupted.
Ahri stepped inside and felt her eyes widen, not in fear but in confusion. Aerin's figure reflected in miniature over the dark of her eyes, and Ahri had to wonder if life simply did not want her to get away from people she had no respect for. Because Aerin and her didn't get along. Aerin's attitude hardly befitted that of a future idol, with her wishy-washy thinking and ambition.
It was hard not to open her mouth and share what she thought of the girlโalways remember your manners, her mother had taught her. So Ahri had learned to avoid and ignore as best as she could. A part of her expected their petty feud to moulder away without her attention.
But now, her jaw slackened, plush lips parting, confusion trickling from her gaze to the rest of her. She didn't know if to greet or to back away and flee. The strangely placed kindness sparked a fire of irritation, the same feeling she always had around her. "Hong Aerin. Of course, I remember you," Ahri replied, setting her sports bag down and tying loose strands of black hair into a messy bun. "Aren't you the one who never even wanted to be an idol? I'm surprised you're still here."
Her voice cooled, grew distant; above, her eyebrows furrowed, carved small lines of annoyance between them. "Oh, I know I'm going to be a great idol. I worked for this, I've always wanted this. I deserve it. I'm not so sure if you do, too." And even if she tried to pull apart her tone from aย mockingย rhythm, it didn't work well, still spilling into her words. "Honestly, you don't deserve this."
aerin felt the air leave her lungs in a mix of fear and shame, her cheeks a burning red as she listened to ahri dig into her. she knew the other trainee wasn't fond of her, but hearing it didn't feel less humiliating. the foolish and childish part of her wanted to be congratulated, a part of her thought that if she just gained enough approval she could then approve of herself. but the other part of her, the part feeling this guilt, knew that ahri was right.
this version of herself didn't deserve the spot in a debut group. but that didn't mean she didn't work just as hard. there wasn't ever a moment that aerin let herself fall behind. she didn't deserve the spot, she'd be the first to admit that, but she damn sure earned it.
"ahri," her voice was certainly still shaking, but she made a point to drop honorifics. she wasn't an aggressive person at all, verbal sparing wasn't her thing, but if she no longer wanted to be a pushover. "you're right. i.. don't think i deserve this. i'm not a confident as you, and maybe i'm not as certain as you."
aerin straightened her back, standing as tall as she could. as she spoke, her hands moved to pull her long brown hair into a ponytail and out of her face. her cheeks were still bright with embarrassment and anxiety but her eyes no longer jumped around with uncertainty.
"but i've always worked hard. there's a reason i got this spot, and i don't plan to fall behind." her voice steadied with the raise of her chin. aerin wasn't a confident individual but she'd been faking it so long she considered herself a professional. "we both are debuting soon, so that must mean i've worked just as hard as you-- or more."
the snark of her final comment shocked her, and she felt her heart jump to say something-- to take it back and grovel. beg ahri to forgive her and profusely apologize before running home, but if she was going to change into someone more deserving of her spot she couldn't let someone undermine her efforts. she'd have to start standing up for herself.
there is one thing that doyeon really liked, and that had unfortunately been flirting with girls.
it's unforgivable, if she thinks. the amount of times she had some maidens' heart broken because they thought too seriously of her playful acts that were nothing more than sweet-little-nothings and had been more of doyeon earning reactions she likes seeing others in. other times, she's thankful that her act gets played along.
and just like any other time, doyeon had simply found someone she sees occasionally when she passes the building. one would say their schedule aligned just like how the red string of fate works, but rather the raven-haired idol is humored by the idea of seeing a cute girl like aerin and her rather obvious reactions.
"sorry aerin, i think the smoke alarm is defective. because you walked past it and it didn't go off."
aerin, for a significant part of her life, knew she was a hopeless romantic. perhaps it came from her struggles to make friends, or the fact she was often too busy to toy with the possibility of a relationship. though... it was likely because she wasn't into boys at all.
it was something she'd mostly kept locked behind closed doors-- she not only didn't have time for the issues it would bring, but she was also just ... nervous. she'd never flirted a day in her life, let alone with another woman. she was truly hopeless.
which is why she found herself blushing a bright red and stumbling over her words whenever she ran into doyeon. not only was she pretty and talented, she also had a level of confidence that aerin could only aspire to. a part of aerin knew it wasn't serious-- maybe she was being made fun of, or teased-- but she still felt her heart flutter at the cheesy pickup line.
"ah, seriously, doyeon-unnie. you can't say things like that... someone might think you're being serious," aerin whined, attempting to laugh it off and ignore the pounding in her heart. gosh, she was such a child. getting to worked up over this. "you're ridiculous, really."
anyone could see from the way that aerin's lips curved up into a smile and how she avoided eye contact, that the comment excited her more than her words let on.
หโยท ออออโณโฅ closed starter for jeong ahri
หโยท ออออโณโฅ location: unknown hydra practice room
being an idol trainee is scary, this much is a well-known fact. aerin has always been aware of that and it was part of why it wasn't her dream to begin with. but here she was, a possible debut looming over her, and she pushed aside to go through the motions.
she really wasn't sure ... what she was still doing here. it was a waste of everyone's time and money. HONG AERIN HAD ZERO DESIRE TO BE AN IDOL. she'd known that from the moment she'd auditioned. so why was she still doing this?
she didn't have answer, so she made her way to one of the practice rooms like she did everyday. her movements were done on autopilot, mostly, her expression blank and lost. aerin ... wanted desperately to have some kind of epiphany. or, maybe find some new meaning in her training and suddenly be motivated to become the nation's sweetheart.
but it never came.
she walked in, gnawing at her bottom lip, but practiced movements were interrupted when she noticed someone else in the room with her. in her time here, she worked to find the practice rooms least accessed. they were usually out of the way, but she felt an overwhelming amount of guilt when she was in a room full of people who actually wanted this opportunity. so she wasn't expecting to see AHRI of all people.
the two didn't speak much, they hardly crossed paths outside of evaluations and they found themselves, as dancers, constantly pit against each other. aerin never took it personally, she understood, but ahri seemed to throw harsh glares or brush past her a little roughly when aerin got a bit more praise. but that wasn't unexpected.
"ah, hello. i don't know if you remember, but i'm aerin...hong!! hong aerin..." she nervously fumbled through an introduction before clearing her throat, nervously placing her items in the corner. aerin was rather hopeless in most social situations, but especially those with pretty women... and especially, especially with pretty women who seemed to not like her.
"i heard that you may be debuting soon, congratulations! i may be as well..." aerin couldn't help the wall her expression soured from it's normal smile when she mentioned the possibility of her debut before quickly fixing itself. "you'll be a great idol, really!!"
หโยท ออออโณโฅ closed starter for park haneul
หโยท ออออโณโฅ location: unknown hydra building corridor
aerin considered herself to be rather likeable.
she never really expressed disagreement with anything or anyone, she always did what was asked of her, she went out of her way to make other comfortable, and she never even raised her voice. it wasn't really an ego thing -- she simply thought she was objectively well liked. probably not loved, most people probably don't feel too strongly toward her unless they were attracted to her, but at least liked.
so it was only natural she was shocked when her attempts to be kind to, or befriend, park haneul always seemed to ... fail. they were close in age, they both liked dancing, and they often ran into each other around the building. aerin knew it was a bit different when it came to male and female trainees being friends, she wasn't naive, but it just seemed like hanuel was one of the first people who disliked her. for what, she couldn't be sure. maybe she'd said something strange? her korean was perfect, she'd been learning it as long as she'd been learning chinese, but maybe she slipped somewhere and offended him? it was possible...
the thought plagued her and she lost herself in the sea of possibilities, not really paying attention to were she was going since she figured she'd walked these hallways enough times to end up somewhere familiar. and in a way, she did.
aerin, ever the klutz, felt herself hit what may as well have been a brick wall and she quickly lost her balance, falling backward. "ai!! since when was there a wall here? ... i'm sure i was headed to --"
she trailed off, her gaze slowly headed upward and her eyes going from squinted in confusion.. to wide in embarrassment and fear.
the very person she was thinking about appeared before her... and she'd just slammed her noggin into his. oh dear.
"OH! haneul-ssi, hello! i'm so sorry, i wasn't paying enough attention where i was going... truly, i am so very sorry!!" she quickly gathered herself, ignoring the dull throb in her head, and bent a full 90 degrees in a bow. now he definitely has a reason to not like her.
despite the emphasis from the Hydra staff that this interview was meant to be much more casual, aerin couldnโt help the way she was (quite literally) shaking in her worn sneakers. she attempted to calm herself by crossing and uncrossing her legs, clearing her throat to fill the silence, and biting her bottom lip that had long since lost the gloss sheโd applied before coming here.
the staff, seated across from her and not at all meeting her nervous energy, appeared to be viewing her files and one of them would look up at her and offer a reassuring smile. it was sweet, though it did nothing to keep her from anxiously playing with her fingers.
in their defense, sheโd been nervous since she had the first meeting following her audition tape submission. everything suddenly felt more real, then, when she was looking miss park jiwon in the eye and being told her debut might be closer than she thought. like sheโd been living in a fantasy world where she could dip in and out between wanting the life of an idol and wanting to abandon it in favor of her true dream. as if she could spend years training alongside people who were desperate for the opportunities she was given, then drop out when she wanted. aerin had been childish and foolish, right up until the point she heard the words โdebut candidateโ.
โso, miss hong aerin,โ one of the Hydra personnel finally broke the silence to address aerin, whose head shot up to attention as she was shaken from her thoughts. โas weโve said, this interview is simply to gather your thoughts and feelings about everythingโ your potential debut, meeting possible teammates, and working on your own music. no need to be nervous, just tell us how you feel.โ another kind smile, but it still only managed to make aerinโs heart race.
โah, yes,โ a pause, aerinโs eyes trailing around the room to avoid eye contact and making note of the camera recording from the corner. โwell.. i have to say i wasnโt really expecting to hear that. to be honest, i feel that i am still.. lacking, in most areasโฆโ she spoke slowly and unsure of herself, much like how she spoke when she first came to korea. even though she knew her parents native language, she always felt strange and like an outsider speaking it. just like how she felt hereโ an outsider. the only one here, possibly, that wasnโt living their dream.
โoh, please donโt think iโm not grateful for the opportunity, or-or i doubt the selection process,โ realizing how she might sound, aerin quickly clarified her point and checked the staffโs expressions (they revealed nothing) to make sure she didnโt shoot herself in the foot. โi deeply appreciate being considered. i do worry that i might be a bit behind some of my potential teammatesโฆ iโve been dancing my whole life almost so i am confident in that. but i havenโt been singing very longโฆand iโve never tried to write or-or compose anything.โ
her insecurities quickly overwhelmed her and spilled out the longer she talked, the illusion of calm shattered the more the reality set in. part of aerin just wanted to break down and cry, right here and now, and tell them sheโd made a mistake and couldnโt do this. there was no way!! but she pinched her thigh and let out a small exhale, clearing her throat before speaking again with a smile.
โbut, i am hopeful. iโm excited to meet my potential teammates. iโve attended international school my whole life, my file mentions that iโm sure, so iโve met a lot of different people. iโm also an only child, which makes me a little lonely sometimes so i would like to meet people i can call my family.โ that much was true, and aerin couldnโt help how warm the thought made her feel. sheโd always been well liked, but she didnโt ever have friends. there wasnโt time for them really, and she just never really feltโฆ like she belonged anywhere.
โso iโฆ i really want to improve. i want to get better at everything. dancing, singing, composing. i want to be a teammate that they can be proud of. i donโt want to ever drag them down.โ aerinโs voice got more and more confident as she spoke. the tremble from before virtually gone, and she made direct eye contact with the staff who paused in their note taking to meet her gaze.
โno matter what, i will not ruin anyone elseโs dream. i will do what it takes to make sure that no one suffers because of me. i will work harder to become a worthy teammate, andโฆ a worthy idol.โ aerin nodded firmly, and turned her gaze to the camera. she wasnโt sure who all would see it, but she wanted them to know she meant it. no matter what, she wouldnโt become a burden. sheโs become better, for those who truly deserve this dream sheโd stolen.
The first round of auditions brought over fifty attendees, vying for a spot in Kiss Studiosโ upcoming projects. Twenty signed exclusive extended contracts with the label, and including a wider pool of already signed trainees, ten female trainees were chosen to start Debut Evaluations: your character. After the deliberation period, your character was e-mailed a formal meeting date to discuss the results of their audition. Kiss Studio Head of Recruitment, Park Ji-won, leads the meeting under Hydraโs main headquarters, on the upper, administrative floors. With her, their secretary and personnel staff to take notes and provide input, answer questions, and delegate the interview. A translator is on-call for those in need of assistance.
The three, much like most staff, hold true to decorum provide crystal-clear, although rather blunt, dialogue. โHello!โ She bowed, โThank you for arriving punctually, we appreciate your effort. This is our first meeting, but Iโve been watching you very closely and my first goal was to fully assess your skills.โ
The secretary in hand continues with an even stricter tone, โNow, thereโs a lot to discuss. After evaluating your audition, we have plans to place you with a set of candidates under Debut Evaluations.โ They let the words settle for a minute, watching for your characterโs expression, and then proceed, โAs a debut candidate group for the year 2023, thereโs a lot of work ahead before any official news are made. In terms of skills, teamwork, and passion for debut, the company has decided to follow a different type of debut preparation. For the coming days, evaluations will be done with songs and choreographies made by the trainees - with the aid of coaches and instructors. We donโt believe idols can appeal to the public relying on only looks or skills. Youโll need to be an independent artist, with your own story to tell. Itโs up to create the story others will gravitate to.โ
This tasks is for Hong Aerin!ย They will go over more overview notes (skillsets), and the extended trainee contract to highlight the need for discrepancy. Debut candidates under ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ will have access on to the backdoor entrance of the company building, allowed mostly for artists and staff. They will also mark a second, casual interview, filmed, to weigh on your feelings about being a hopeful candidate. Itโll take place the following week after auditions are closed and should last for 15-30 minutes. In order to complete the Debut Evaluation Task, players will have to:
SOLO:ย Write aย drabbleย (300+ words) about your characterโs second interview. Take into account the news of a potential debut, feelings about meeting future teammates, and composing their own songs soon. The interview will be between your character and two Hydra personnel in a private training studio located on the lower floors of Hydraโs main headquarters, as well, Earnย 25 POINTSย to increaseย any skillย on their point page or choose to collect.
Be sure to tag threads with #hd:tasks & #hd:global ! The deadline for threads/point submissions is February 5, 2023. The mod team will personally contact new players for future current or future additions to the untitled project from this time forward. Please, do not post mod submission until thread is completed. The thread should be placed above the divider and under a โread moreโ if not already placed.
เณเพเฟ hey, you go girl โฏsolo [ word count: 746 ] หห-
หโยท ออออโณโฅ KISS global audition recording
หโยท ออออโณโฅ december 31st, 2022
หโยท ออออโณโฅ unknown dance studio
everything had led to this point.
aerin knew that -- the way her heart was pounding and the blood was rushing through her ears, she knew she'd reached a crossroads. sitting cross - legged in front of the dance studio mirror, she stared into the eyes of her reflection that were full of apprehensiveness and the dark bags that carried all her doubt. the kiss studio audition was only natural. why wouldn't she go through with it now? she'd been practicing 'U-Go-Girl' everyday on top of her recital piece for roughly 4 months, determined to perfect it. many nights were spent in this very room, powering through the intense fatigue and body pain to get one move so sharp and perfect there wasn't a hair out of place.
she wasn't a singer, she'd never been trained for long, but aerin sat in her bedroom and practiced singing the song until her throat was too tired to make another sound. if someone asked her to, she could probably sing it from memory in her sleep with how the song's lyrics were burned deep into her psyche. for better or worse, she'd studied each and every inch of her face and body in the mirror when she woke up. hundreds -- maybe thousands? -- was spent on high end skincare to make sure that she would look better than she ever had for her profile shots. aerin's father, despite the protests of her grandmother, even got her a personal trainer to ensure that she was in the best shape of her life. the reflection seemed to warp and shake under her watchful eye, perhaps it too was afraid of what it saw in her.
so it wouldn't make sense to stop here, when all she needed to do was record herself putting it all together. she just needed to show them that they needed hong aerin on their team. this was the easy part. she knew that, but still the tears welled up in her eyes. they didn't dare fall -- she wouldn't let them. the tears hitting the ground would make it all too real, and then she couldn't be sure that she wouldn't run as far away as possible when presented with that reality.
"you can do this. you've done the work, just record yourself putting it together," the voice that reached her ears sounded foreign, and the only indication it was her own was the fact she watched her lips form the words in her native language of Chinese. maybe because it offered her comfort. with a final firm nod to herself, she stood and made her way to the camcorder situated firmly on the tripod. aerin adjusted it's position so she was centered, marking her spot with her water bottle that was long empty as she anxiously downed it's contents. deep breath in, deep breath out. her pointer finger hovered over the record button, trembling with anxiety, before it came down far too harshly as she steadied herself and her resolve once again.
take position. look into the lens. another deep breath in, out. smile for the camera.
"hello, my name is hong aerin and i am nineteen years old. i am fully korean, but was born and partially raised in beijing, china. i've been training for roughly a year officially, however i have been doing ballet for 14 years," aerin paused briefly to calm herself, blinking rapidly and trying to remember what she'd practiced so many times before. "both domestically and internationally, i've been acknowledge as a junior ballerina. i do not have as much experience in singing, however i am more than prepared to do what it takes to improve."
breathe. steady. smile. make yourself look charming.
"for my audition, i will be performing U-Go-Girl by jang boram. thank you for your time and consideration!" with some final enthusiastic yell and bright dimpled smile, aerin shuffled over to her phone that lay forgotten on the ground to hit play before quickly repositioning herself.
in her mind, she teleported herself to the stage. she was 5 years old, dressed beautifully in her first recital's uniform and ballet shoes that were a little too small because she was growing so fast. big, round brown eyes were anxiously searching the audience and locked onto a young man in the front row who matched her anxious energy with a big smile and misty eyes. young aerin smiled back and knew it would be alright. all she had to do
was dance.
aerin didnโt hear the music so much as felt it. she felt it in every part of her body and moved like a woman possessed. she knew she was singing as she was supposed to, felt her lips move, but she couldnโt be sure how she sounded. it was just her and the squeak of her shoes as she moved with that grace sheโd spent years perfecting. the thought that maybe she didnโt sound well, maybe there was a voice crack or two, didnโt cross her mind at all. it was just her and the movements of every part of her body.
