js saw that you accepted reqs for drabbles …… can u pls write for jay after an argument w him ….. silent comfort because that’s dada and i am also a big hurtcomfort lover, big thank u from ⭐️
YO no joke i had a similar thing written already but with jake So i switched it around a bit and now ✅🥺 hope u like it
warnings :: established relationship, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, happy ending
word count :: 2.2k
a/n :: nerd!won is sucking the Light from my soul but we endure…. this is a very old draft so ignore Mistakes😞
the tears start the moment you hear the front door slam shut.
for the first few minutes, you helplessly try to convince yourself that you’re fine. you stand, frozen, in the middle of the living room with your arms folded tightly over your chest, staring at the front door as if looking at it long enough might somehow make everything that just happened feel less real. the apartment is exactly the same as it was before the argument. the lamp is still glowing in the corner, your half-finished drink is still sitting on the coffee table, and the blanket you had been sharing earlier is still crumpled at the end of the couch. everything looks painfully ordinary, which somehow makes the emptiness beside you feel even worse.
you tell yourself that you’re angry.
you’re allowed to be angry. jay had raised his voice, he’d gotten frustrated, and he’d walked out when you were still standing there with shiny eyes. you know he’s hot headed, and you know that when he gets overwhelmed, he needs space before he says something he’ll regret. you’ve always understood that about him. tonight, though, understanding it really doesn’t make it hurt any less.
you swallow hard and wipe at the wetness underneath your eyes. your throat feels tight, and you take a shaky breath as you walk over to the couch. you sit down slowly, pulling your knees toward your chest and wrapping your arms around them. for a while, you just stare at the floor.
then, your face crumples again. you press both hands over your mouth when the first sob escapes, as though you can somehow stop yourself from crying if you’re quiet enough. your shoulders shake beneath your arms, and soon there are tears running down your cheeks so much faster than you could wipe them away. you hate how quickly everything falls apart once you let yourself cry. twenty minutes ago, you were standing in front of jay doing a good job of staying composed, and now you’re curled into the corner of your own couch wondering how he’s hurt you this much.
the worst part is that you keep thinking about the way he left.
the argument had started over something small. at least, it’d seemed small at first. you’d been trying to explain that you’d felt distant from him lately, that there had been several little moments over the past few days that had left you feeling ignored, neglected even, and that you hadn’t known how to bring it up without sounding like you were complaining. you’d tried to wait for the right moment. you’d told yourself he was tired, that he had things on his mind, that you were probably overthinking it. eventually, though, the feelings had piled up enough that keeping them to yourself had started to hurt more than saying something.
jay had been sitting on the other side of the room when you finally brought it up. at first, he had listened. then he’d started getting defensive, and you could see the change happen in front of you. his jaw tightened, his brows pulled together, and his fingers started running through his hair every few seconds. he’d gotten up and started pacing while you spoke, trying to explain his side at the same time you were trying to explain yours.
you remember telling him that you weren’t trying to fight with him. you remember him saying that he wasn’t fighting either. you also remember just how quickly his voice had gotten louder.
“i’m trying to talk to you.” you muttered out, tone tinged with a subtle fear you hoped he wouldn’t notice. your voice had sounded so small compared to his.
jay stopped pacing and looked at you, frustration written across his face. “i am listening.”
“you’re not.”
“i am.”
“then why does it always feel like i’m talking to a wall?”
the second the words left your mouth, you wished you could take them back. his expression changed, and for a moment there was a flash of hurt underneath all the frustration. you almost apologized. you almost walked over and took his hand.
instead, you both kept going.
the conversation stopped being about what had upset you in the first place. it became about the way you were talking to each other, the way he was getting increasingly angry, the way you were getting emotional, and all the things neither of you had meant to say until they were suddenly out in the open. you’d watched jay rub both hands over his face, trying to calm himself down, while you stood there with tears gathering in your eyes.
you’d wanted him to notice.
he had. that was the part that hurt. you saw the moment his expression softened when he looked at you, brown eyes wide. but his frustration was still there. he told you he needed to leave before he said something worse, and before you could figure out what to say, he’d grabbed his keys and walked toward the door.
you remember following him a few steps, wanting to reach for his arm. you remember thinking that if you asked him to stay, maybe he would. but you didn’t ask.
he opened the door, paused for half a second, and looked back at you.
“i’ll come back when i’m calm.”
and then he just left, the slam of the door echoing throughout your apartment.
now, sitting alone on the couch, you bury your face against your knees and cry harder. your chest aches from holding your breath between sobs, and your fingers curl into the fabric of your sleeves as you try to steady yourself. you don’t know whether you’re more hurt by the argument itself or by the fact that you miss him so badly despite everything.
you reach for your phone once and your screen lights up. there’s nothing from him. you turn it face down again, you don’t want to just stare at it. you don’t want to wonder if he’s coming back. you don’t want to admit that a large part of you is helplessly listening for his footsteps in the hallway.
when the lock finally turns, you almost don’t believe it.
your head lifts immediately, and for a second you simply sit there, frozen. the door opens slowly, and jay steps inside with his keys still in his hand. he closes the door behind himself, and the moment he looks toward the couch, he stops abruptly.
you watch the realization settle over his face as he takes you in. your swollen eyes, your damp cheeks, the way you’ve curled into yourself beneath the blanket. whatever he’d been thinking about when he walked through the door disappears completely.
jay looks devastated. his eyebrows scrunch upwards and the shame in his gaze is almost tangible. he doesn’t rush toward you, just stands there for a moment, staring at you with his shoulders slumped, as though seeing the evidence of your crying has made everything from earlier hit him all at once.
then he walks over and kneels in front of you. you can’t quite bring yourself to look at him and he doesn’t force you, despite the need in his eyes to just see you okay. his hands rest against his thighs for a second before one slowly lifts toward your face. he hesitates, giving you enough time to pull away if you want to. when you don’t, his palm settles gently against your cheek.
his skin is warm. his thumb brushes beneath your eye, catching the wetness there, you close them. the touch makes your chest ache all over again and suddenly fresh tears are falling again, the lump in your throat returning.
jay’s other hand comes up, and suddenly he’s holding your face between both palms, looking at you with an expression that makes your heart hurt. his thumbs move carefully across your cheeks, wiping away the tears that haven’t dried yet. he doesn’t try to make you smile and he doesn’t act like everything is fixed simply because he’s back.
he shuffles forward slightly to lean until his forehead rests against yours. you can feel his breath against your face, uneven and warm. his hands remain on your cheeks, thumbs moving slowly as though he needs to keep touching you to convince himself that you’re really there.
when he pulls you into his arms, you don’t hesitate. you fold into him immediately. your hands grip the back of his hoodie, and jay wraps both arms around you so tightly that your face disappears against his shoulder. one hand slides up to the back of your head while the other settles between your shoulder blades, holding you close as your body finally gives up the last of its resistance.
another sob leaves you, jay’s arms tightening in silent reply. he presses his lips against your hair, then your temple, then the side of your forehead, each kiss lingering slightly longer than the last. his fingers move through your hair in slow strokes, smoothing it away from your face before settling against the back of your neck.
you can feel the care in the way he holds you. there’s a gentleness to him now that wasn’t there earlier. his movements are slow, deliberate, almost protective, as though he’s afraid that anything too sudden might hurt you further than he already has with his words. everytime your breath catches, his hand moves across your back again, rubbing soothing circles through the fabric of your shirt.
you tuck your face deeper into his neck. he smells like himself. it’s such a simple thing, but it makes you want to cry all over again. the familiar scent of his hoodie, the persistent warmth of his skin, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your cheek. you’d spent the last twenty minutes trying to convince yourself that you didn’t need him, and now that he’s holding you, your body seems to be reminding you just how safe you’ve always felt here.
when you finally pull back enough to breathe properly, his hands immediately return to your face. he brushes his thumbs beneath your eyes, looking at you carefully before leaning forward and pressing a soft kiss to one cheek. then the other, another to your forehead. his nose brushes yours for a second before he pulls you back against his chest.
his words haven't disappeared, and neither have the sour feelings as a result of them. somewhere beneath all the relief of having him back, you know there’ll still be a conversation to have when you’re both calmer. you know there are things you need to explain and things jay needs to understand.
right now, though, neither of you is ready for that. right now, you just need him close. jay understands, he always has. when you need to just be held against him or when you need him talk you down, he understands.
he sits back against the couch and gently pulls you with him until you’re tucked on his lap, your legs curled up on either side of his. one arm wraps securely around your waist while the other moves through your hair. his fingers slowly scratch your scalp, then smooth your hair back again, repeating the same motion until your body begins to relax.
you feel his lips press against the top of your head, staying there for a few seconds. when he pulls away, his hand moves down your back, rubbing slowly between your shoulders. you can feel the tension gradually leaving your muscles beneath his touch.
you reach for his hand and he immediately gives it to you. your fingers intertwine, and his thumb starts brushing over your knuckles. the movement is almost absentminded, something he does without thinking. you watch your joined hands for a moment before leaning back against him, the tears that were previously flowing out of your eyes waning.
jay shifts the blanket higher around your legs before adjusting you again, making sure your head is resting comfortably against his chest. he treats you so gently that it almost hurts. you feel another kiss against your forehead, then another.
he doesn’t say much because he doesn’t need to. his apology is in the way he keeps checking your face. it’s in the way his fingers never quite leave your skin, always finding your hand or your hair or your cheek. it’s in the way he keeps pulling you impossibly closer whenever you shift, trying to eliminate even an inch of distance left between you.
eventually, your breathing evens out. the tears stop. your eyelids feel heavy from crying, and your body feels even more exhausted. you curl closer to him, listening to his heartbeat steady beneath your ear. his hand still moves slowly up and down your back.
the apartment is quiet again, but the silence no longer feels suffocating. because you aren’t alone in it. you can feel his fingers gently combing through your hair and the warmth of his arm around your waist. jay presses one last kiss to your forehead and keeps his lips there for another moment before settling his cheek against the top of your head. his arms tighten around you, and you instinctively curl further into his chest.
you don’t know how long you stay like that and, to be honest, you don’t really care. the explanations can wait. for now, you’re safe in his arms, and jay seems determined to hold you there until you believe it too.
taglist :: @nishimurarik, @luvpocket, @enteaura, @contactviaemail, @gojopolo, @rikiiholiic, @nikisleftside
↳ comment to be added ᵎᵎ
warnings :: established relationship, slice of life, non idol au, fluff
word count :: 1.3k
a/n :: something little while i work on nerd!won
the room is still dark when you wake up. for a few seconds, you don’t remember what pulled you out of your sleep. there isn’t any noise coming from outside, no alarm going off, no sudden movement beside you. the room is quiet enough that you can hear the faint hum of your old air conditioner and the occasional shift of fabric whenever either of you breathes.
you stay still.
sunghoon is still fast asleep beside you, turned slightly toward your side of the bed. his face half buried in the pillow, dark hair falling messily over his forehead. he looks different like this. softer. there’s none of the usual expression he carries when he’s awake, none of the little frown he gets when he’s concentrating or the sleepy smile that appears whenever he realizes you’re looking at him.
you smile to yourself. it’s still way too early to get up.
the sky beyond your thin curtains is beginning to lighten, though only barely. a thin strip of pale blue sits between them where they haven’t been pulled together properly. he hates when you do that, brows furrowed when he playfully scolds you and reminds you that he’ll “make you get up and shut them properly, no matter how sleepy you are.” he never does.
you can make out the outline of the chair in the corner of your bedroom, the pile of clothes you left there last night, and sunghoon’s jacket hanging over the back.
you close your eyes again. you don’t fall asleep. instead, you listen to him breathe.
it’s something you’ve gotten used to. there was a time when waking up beside someone felt strange, when you would lie there carefully and wonder what you were supposed to do with yourself while the other person slept, opting to just fiddle with your fingers while you waited for them to wake up.
now, it feels natural.
your hand is resting somewhere between you, half underneath the blanket. after a moment, you move it a little closer to him. your fingers brush against the curve of his bicep and you stop there, not wanting him to wake up, instead just resting your hand on his arm.
a few seconds pass before his hand moves in his sleep. his fingers drag over to find yours without him opening his eyes, almost as if he knows exactly where you are. you let out the smallest giggle.
“you’re awake,” you whisper.
there’s no response and you aren’t sure if he actually heard you. his fingers close loosely around yours anyway. you lie there for another few minutes, just staring at him. the slope of his nose and the little moles adorning his face that he gets fake exasperated at when you poke. the stray eyelash on his cheek the way his nose twitches even deep in sleep.
and then his eyes slowly open, barely at first.
“what time is it?” he murmurs, other hand shifting up to rub at his eyes. his voice is low and rough from sleep. you glance toward your phone on the bedside table.
“six thirty.”
he blinks.
“why are you awake?”
“i don’t know.”
“you should go back to sleep.”
“so should you.”
he considers this for a moment.
“okay.”
his eyes close again. you smile.
“that’s it?”
“mhm.” he hums out, other hand reaching to cover your eyes shut before you playfully slap his hand away, the grin on his face now matching yours.
he shuffles closer to you, the mattress shifts beneath his weight as he rolls onto his side, and suddenly you’re tucked against his chest. his arm settles around your waist, warm even through your shirt. you relax into him, basking in his warmth because unlike you, his never felt clammy. his chin rests lightly against the top of your head. neither of you says anything.
you like mornings like this.
there’s something comforting about having nowhere to be. no messages that need answering. no classes, no plans, no reason to check the time again. just the two of you beneath a warm blanket while the world outside slowly wakes up.
sunghoon’s thumb moves lazily against your side.
“cold?” he whispers into your hair.
“a little.”
one of his eyes peeks open only to see that he’s hogged the blanket again, half of your body bare. he pulls it up higher around you.
“better?”
“yeah.”
“good.” he mutters before pressing a kiss atop of your head.
his voice is almost a whisper now. you just tuck your face impossibly further against his chest. this is usually met with teasing about how you’re “trying to burrow inside of him,” but both of you are too tired to care. his heartbeat is steady beneath your ear. you stay like that until you start getting warm enough to fall asleep again. then you remember something.
“sunghoon.”
“hm?” you feel the vibration of his hum against your forehead.
“we have nothing for breakfast.”
he’s quiet for a moment.
“we have cereal.”
“we finished it yesterday.”
“toast?”
“no bread.”
another pause.
“we can order something.”
you lift your head.
“at six in the morning?”
“some places are open.”
“you’d order breakfast this early?”
he looks at you with sleepy eyes.
“i’d do anything for you.” he whispers, narrowing his eyes.
you stare at him, trying your hardest to fight back the giddy smile that usually follows his overdramatics. he just stares back.
then he adds, “especially if it means i don’t have to cook.”
you giggle into his chest, he smiles in return. it’s small and sleepy, the kind of smile he only seems to have in the mornings. you pull back a little to reach up and push his hair away from his eyes. he doesn’t complain.
instead, he catches your wrist and presses a lazy kiss to the inside of it, eyes locked onto yours, gaze filled with so much love despite his lethargy. your stomach still does that familiar little flip, even after all this time.
“what?” he asks, knowing expression pasted onto his face.
“nothing.”
“you’re staring.”
“you’re cute.”
“i’m half asleep.”
“still cute.” you shuffle up to press a chaste kiss to his nose, prompting yet another overdramatic nose scrunch in mock disgust. you don’t miss the way he pulls you slightly closer or the way he averts his gaze, blush spreading slowly across his cheeks.
the sky has gotten lighter. the darkness in the room has softened into a muted grey, and you can finally see the details of his face fully. the little crease between his eyebrows that never seems to disappear completely (you blame his job). the faint red mark on his cheek from the scrunched up pillowcase. his hair sticking up in a direction it definitely isn’t supposed to.
you reach over and smooth it down. it immediately springs back up. you try again. same result. the third time, sunghoon catches your hand.
“leave it.”
“it’s sticking up.”
“i know.”
“you look ridiculous.”
“then stop looking.”
you smile.
“no.”
he looks at you for a moment, before bringing your hand back beneath the blanket. his other hand reaches around to the back of your head, threading his fingers though your hair as you settle down beside him again.
the room grows brighter by degrees.
eventually, you know you’ll have to get up. you’ll have to make coffee, find something to eat, open the curtains and let the morning in properly. sunghoon will probably complain about being cold when he leaves the bed. you’ll tell him to put on a shirt. he’ll pretend he doesn’t hear you.
for now, though, neither of you moves. his arm stays around your waist, your fingers remain tangled with his. you close your eyes. sunghoon’s breathing slowly evens out again. and this time, when sleep starts pulling you back under, you let it.
taglist :: @nishimurarik, @luvpocket, @enteaura, @contactviaemail, @gojopolo, @rikiiholiic
↳ comment to be added ᵎᵎ
jay i really like you but that list has disgusted me ………… no shade to you and jus so you know it’s no shade i’d like to put in a formal request to be your ⭐️ anon. my top 5 : gojo, miwa, geto, yuji, yuta ,,,,,,,,,, pls accept me.
i accept you but not your ranking . fraud yuta d1 bumass beg making the list😭😭😭😭 i do not Accept . MIWA… i have never understood the love for her enlighten me, satosugu accepted, yuji #Mijo accepted✅
What’s next? Both dealer riki and nerd won were really good! I’d love to see more of jay or sunghoon (kitty jay headcannons were my fav)!!
i’m working on another nerd!jungwon rn but i haven’t gotten too far with it yet as it’s a longer one 🥹 And yes….. Missing jay so i’ll try to post something smaller inbetween .
gojo pfp…. gimme ur top 5 jjk characters ranking ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
you might hate me😞😞😞 genuinely everyone clowns on my favs but here you go and i want you to know that i am taking this very Seriously .
mahito number one
angel sent from heaven just for me like boiiiiii who gave him the right to b so cute WOW . turned on immediately as soon as i see him #sexy #inlove
toji
he is just super endearing to me, i don’t find him that sexy this is more like . Wow . i want to live in your skin and become you . minus the brokie bum unemployed abandoned son sitch
geto
my Satosugu imysm… he’s my malewife who had the right idea just 😞 went ab it the wrong way 😞
naoya
DON’T KILL ME ok . but that’s ForbiddenDada™️ there’s really something about his foidslayer3000 charm that does it for me …
sukuna
angel boy
BONUS nanami
official state registered public well known dada .
user heebunnii you r like.. the best headcanon writer… and u organize ur works really satisfying in my brain… keep doing what u do… u are so cutieful and Amaze
Wow are you the real life angel descended from heaven🥺 i lobe you Hooniful and i’m glad the hiatus is fake😞😞
Writing belly bulge kink is disgustingly non inclusive. Read your puppy jake headcannons and was extremely disappointed. Not everyone can experience this and by celebrating a specific, hard-to-achieve physical silhouette, it marginalizes overweight people with everyday, non-flat bodies who participate in or have the same anatomical traits. Also it’s not even real. It’s extremely rare and not many people experience it, Do better.
ok sorry mijo😞😞😞😞 But!!! it is definitely real, have experienced first hand. but i will do my best to be inclusive from now on😞😞😞😞😞
OOHJKH MY GOD!!!! dealer!riki…… i love your brain… i love you…. thank you so much it was so perfect (also internship is going strong btw and i have an interview with a diff firm next week) love from your very appreciative and also biggest fan 🐰
HI BUNNYBUNNY i’m so glad You liked it🥹🥹 it was kind of rushed so. lmk if there’s any errors Because it’s also not proofread #chud. pls pls tell me how your Interview goes omg and Good luck!! But you don’t need it because you will one trillion percent get the j*b.
gamechangershow
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
jimmyeatworldofficial