Sade Olutola
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Cosmic Funnies
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Today's Document
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i don't do bad sauce passes
Keni
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@helminth-hrt
Chi, they/them bisexual fagdyke trans man. I am intersex (and no, you’re not getting my medical information). Transandrophobes get sent to the Jade Light and paramisia gets one hundred Dual Toxocyst bolts to the face. Pro-kink and pro-fiction.
Quit eating the faces of your own in place of the leopards; they'll still devour yours without a second thought.
“Trans men only make soft musi-“ SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP
HAVE SOME TRANSMASC TECHNO/HARD GROOVE TRACK SNEAK PEAK FOR PRIDE MONTH
i made it on my fucking laptop at work so no it is not mixed or mastered well yet but it will be someday(after I’m done with my tests to become an AMT probably). I just wanted to give a sneak peak so i skipped around a bunch lol.
Just wanna say:
No, trans women aren’t the only ones making great electronic/experimental/loud music. (Although I know and love and admire many trans women who are FANTASTIC producers and I love learning and creating and working with them)
No trans men don’t just make soft ukulele music (although the ones that do should not be mocked for it because any music creation is dope, I’m just sick of the stereotypes).
This track is nowhere near done yet but I MADE IT. And I am a trans man. And I will continue to make loud weird music whether I ever release this stuff or not. I don’t want any recognition for this I just want yall to see that there is so much diverity in art from any demographic (and it it’s super weird to say ____ gender identity group only makes ___ kind of art/music)
"Transmascs and trans men only make soft ukulele music"
https://sunrot.bandcamp.com/track/untethered
https://saahrg.bandcamp.com/album/spineless-ruins
https://astroath.bandcamp.com/track/mysteries-foretold
https://ashenspire.bandcamp.com/track/the-law-of-asbestos
https://vervloektband.bandcamp.com/track/femboy
https://vilecreature.bandcamp.com/track/you-who-has-never-slept
"Racialised" is much better than PoC but I've been leaning a lot on the concept of racial markedness. Because that allows us to make statements like "the name Jamal is racially marked in USA". Rather than saying something like "Jamal is a PoC name", a nonsense statement, saying it's racially marked in USA allows us to contrast with societies like Albania or the Arab countries where the name Jamal is ordinary, thus unmarked.
It's a concept I've kind of imported from linguistic analysis; saying a speech pattern is more or less marked does not really allow us to avoid the subject of who's doing the marking. A statement like "womens' speech is more marked in Lakota" necessitates that we understand that it's the Lakota who are marking womens' speech. A foreigner can't tell the difference and probably doesn't understand why it would thus be weird to see a man using speech patterns associated with women, in the same way an Albanian wouldn't understand why USA people would think Jamal is a Black name.
You! You get it. In my view, if someone is saying "racialised" or "racially marked" without acknowledgement of context, they are doing it in a way that is gramatically incorrect.
being an intersex person who isnt a waifish hairless elf devoid of any visible sex characteristics i honestly think if i was a fictional character id be denounced as a transphobic stereotype
when intersex people have mixed sex characteristics and hormones 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯
"The Tom-Boy Who Was Changed Into A Real Boy," a children's poem written between 1859 and 1862 and published by McLoughlin Brothers Publishing in New York.
The poem is part of the "Aunt Oddamadood series," which appeared to primarily create entertaining yet moralistic poems for children, in which a naughty child (other examples include "Little Miss Consequence," "The Conceited Boy," "The Mischievous Fingers") is presented and shown the error of their ways, to teach children what will happen if they do not behave. With that context, the purpose of this poem appears to warning children raised as girls that, should they act like a tomboy, they will eventually be quietly sent off to sea. It is made clear both at the beginning and the end of the poem that the child's tomboyish nature is a "fault" and something the audience must be "cautioned" about.
I learned about this poem from this small collection of transgender antebellum (pre-Civil War) USAmerican children's literature, collected by historian Jen Manion. Another relevant example from that collection is "Lucy Nelson; or, the Boy-Girl," the story of a child assigned female who dislikes femininity and prefers playing with her brothers and acting like a boy. Lucy and their brothers get in trouble, but Lucy is singled out for punishment. They are forced to wear boys clothes for a month; this doesn't initially seem that bad, but it becomes clear that the real punishment is subjecting Lucy to gendered humiliation. Lucy's brother laugh at them, declare that if they dress as a boy then they will "be treated as one," leading to them being physically and verbally cruel to them. At a dinner party, the stress of the gendered humiliation they are facing for their transmasculinity reaches a breaking point. A guest's fixation and confusion on their gender leads them to shout, in tears, "I am not a boy!" to end the inquisition.
Lucy's story ends not with them simply realizing they are a girl; it is explicitly detailed that it is very difficult for them to resist their "boyish" nature and they were "in danger of lapsing," but that eventually they became an "obedient little girl," having been successfully humiliated back into appropriate (and, notably, white) daughterhood. These examples show clearly how the narrative around the "acceptance" of tomboys hides the very real disdain and cruelty directed at transmasculinized youth that has existed in Western culture for centuries. Rather than their masculinity being praised, or the masculinization of a young girl being seen as positive, these tomboys are depicted as out-of-control, insufficiently white, and further masculinization is depicted as a punishment done to tomboys, something meant to be humiliating and scary, thus coercing them back to the role of daughterwifemother.
Also wanna add that this is a good example of malgendering in history, and why that term is so important when talking about anti-transmasculinity.
For both Lucy and the tomboy-turned-sailor, further masculinization is a punishment. The story of Lucy literally uses the phrase "if she dresses like a boy, we'll treat her like a boy" as a justification for verbal and physical harassment and humiliation.
& while the poem is lighthearted and meant to be fun, it is very clear that becoming a sailor is not something the tomboy is doing for fun or of his own volition. The poem explicitly describes the transition as happening "quite quietly" and "without noise," and being orchestrated by an unclear "them" which we can assume is likely the tomboy's family. Being a sailor was a job which involved hard manual labor, dangerous circumstances, and associated with lower-class (thus sexually dangerous) men. Again, this poem is from a series of moralistic poems which very clearly lay out for children what happens when you act "bad." The message here is: if you, little girl, try to act like a boy, you will become coarse and unloveable and be sent away to sea to live amongst dirty, dangerous cis men.
This is why malgendering is such an important term and concept, for all trans people, but here particularly with anti-transmasculinity. And I also hope that y'all keep these examples in your back pocket to use the next time you hear someone run their mouth about how the patriarchy just isn't that concerned about policing masculinity in people perceived as girls, because ummmm patriarchy LIKE boy stuff duh!!!!!!!!
This is really interesting to me because its so seldom that something lines up so well with my particular experience of having grown up intersex and as a transmasculine person. An experience that has led me to believe that the reason the policing of transmasculinity in kids is seen as "invisible" or even non-existent is because it often functions not on a level of open hostility, but on a subtle level of coy, "concerned for your future" social isolation, ostracism, and humiliation that feels orchestrated like a dance throughout your childhood and impossible to explain to anyone not on the transmasc or butch spectrum. I started getting "helpful" comments, snide remarks, and even doctors office visits about "fixing" how masculine my body and presentation were literally even before I realized I was trans or started to consciously play with my gender presentation.
Little girls and kids who were AFAB are only "allowed" to be tomboys insofar as their eventual assimilation into gender conforming feminine womanhood can be assured. If that assimilation is at all in question, the gloves come off really quick and they start considering forcing you onto supplemental estrogen.
#it makes me feel a lot of things to see this written out#especially the second case - that was… a lot of my childhood#‘if you act like a boy we’ll treat you like a boy’ and crucially ‘let other children treat you like a boy’ as a withdrawal of protection#or - more accurately- a throwing the wolves#the boys knew I wasn’t ‘a real boy’ - it was just a license to do violence without repurcussions
^ this is exactly it.
this is what makes anti-transmasculinity so fucking infuriating to talk about. because people say shit like "well little girls are rewarded for acting masculine!" with no sense of irony.
but really so much anti-transmasculinity swirls around this notion that being made a boy is a punishment for people intended to be girls. on two levels:
because being a girl, and succeeding in the role of daughterwifemother, is your personhood. that is why the above poem is titled "the tomboy who was turned into a real boy," while depicting the tomboy dressed as a sailor with his head in his hands as if he is crying. it is not a whimsical adventure, it is meant to be read as obviously negative as a poem about a child who steals or is rude and gets punished for it.
the ever-present specter of cis male violence (physical and sexual) is not any less present for transmasculine people, and those who wield anti-transmasculinity (especially against children) know this. its implicit in the poem, its explicit in the story of Lucy, its the background radiation of every 19th century story of a FTM crossdresser which obsesses over whether or not they kept their virginity while living around cis men.
i never ever ever ever ever want to hear anyone claim that "masculine girls" are less hated than "feminine boys"* again. everyone get radicalized and educated on anti-transmasculinity RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!
*ironically, the collection i got this from also includes a letter written by a person talking about why feminine boys are actually good (as long as they aren't too girly) because they are polite and helpful and studious, while masculine girls are problematic because they are rude and dirty. this was not a pro-transfem statement by any means, but its literally the exact opposite of what people like to claim about how this works. gosh, its almost like maybe we should stop trying to figure out which binary gender is more policed, because its an exercise in futility that only encourages us vs them binary thinking!
oh this is just vile
Backed by a conservative legal group, a white doctor is suing “Find A Black Doctor” for allegedly discriminating against non-Black physician
A white doctor based in Colorado has teamed up with a conservative legal group to sue the online directory, “Find A Black Doctor,” for allegedly discriminating against physicians based on their race. The lawsuit was filed May 19 in a Manhattan federal court by dermatologist Dr. Travis Morrell and Do No Harm, an organization founded in 2022 that publicly condemns DEI. The complaint accuses the directory of excluding non-Black physicians by restricting eligibility to “Black physicians and dentists in active clinical practice.” The suit also alleges that the online platform “robs” non-Black physicians of “advertising exposure” and promotes “racial concordance,” the notion that patients receive better care from doctors of the same race. “Find A Black Doctor indefensibly robs some physicians of valuable advertising exposure and deprives patients of the opportunity to discover capable providers without regard to race,” reads a statement from a Do No Harm rep in a press release. According to the complaint, Morrell, a double board-certified physician and member of Do No Harm, says he applied to join the directory on Dec. 23, 2025. However, he didn’t receive a response and followed up by email months later, but was met with silence. The suit, which targets the website and its founder, claims Morrell’s application was “constructively rejected because he is white.” “Do No Harm and Dr. Morrell are entitled to relief,” reads the legal complaint.
Also links for those studies mentioned in the screenshots:
Physician-patient race-match reduces patient mortality
This paper assesses the impacts of physician-patient race-match, especially Black patients paired with Black physicians, on patient mortality. We draw on administrative data from Florida, linking hospital encounters from mid-2011 through 2014 to information from the Florida Physician Workforce Survey. Focusing on uninsured patients experiencing unscheduled hospital admissions who are conditionally randomly assigned to physicians, we find that physician-patient race-match for Black patients reduces the likelihood of within-hospital mortality by 0.28 percentage points, a 27% reduction relative to the overall mortality rate. An alternative identification strategy relying on instrumental variables provides a similar finding.
Black Representation in the Primary Care Physician Workforce and Its Association With Population Life Expectancy and Mortality Rates in the US
In this cohort study of survival outcomes for 1618 US counties, Black PCPs operated in less than half of all counties during each of 3 time points assessed (2009, 2014, and 2019). On average, every 10-percent increase in county-level Black PCP representation was associated with 31-day higher age-standardized life expectancy among Black individuals. Higher Black PCP representation levels were also associated with lower all-cause mortality rates among Black individuals and with reduced mortality rate disparities between Black and White individuals.
Hey. Heyhey. Do me a favor real quick.
If you don't already know you have issues doing so, squat down real quick. Bend your knees all the way and touch the floor. Just make sure you can do it. Okay? For me? And then stand up all the way and make sure you can balance on one foot.
Like. You don't need to blow it into some huge thing. Just. Make sure all your bits and peices still work the way you think they do.
Can you turn your head to look behind you without twisting your shoulders? What about standing on your toes? If you sit down on the floor can you get back up without using your hands?
If there was ever a tumblr post worth sending to your mom, it's this one.
Just saying, bodies are a use it or lose it kinda thing.
okay so every time I see this post crop back up in queues and notifications I end up thinking about it. Because I made the post and even I'm still doing the thing where I read the post about maintaining range of motion in my delicate meatsuit and I nod and hmm and think yeah that's a good idea and then dont move from where I'm curled up shrimp style staring at the nightmare rectangle.
So like. Thinking real hard about moving doesn't count as moving. Major bummer. Anyways. Joints.
i like being a lesbian and all, but holy shit, men are so cool. i hope all men reading this have a wonderful day.
i like being gay and all, but holy shit, women are so cool!!!! i hope all women reading this have a wonderful day as well!!!!!!!!!
[image description: the epic handshake meme. one arm is labelled gay people and the other is labelled lesbians. in the middle it says "fuck yeah bro". end id]
hey guys, quick reminder! this post is about uplifting other people!!! tags like 'ugh, but men are gross lol' or 'op has never met a man' are not welcome and will recieve an insta block! men are cool! women are cool! thank you for coming to my fucking ted talk! :-)
I made this out of the rage I felt from seeing transphobic, butchphobic and enbyphobic comments in my tl.
Being a lesbian is part of my identity too and I refuse to let other people tell me I am not a lesbian just because I don't fit their binary perception of things. It's so sad to see other lesbians shitting on butches and gender non-conforming or non-binary lesbians.
But hey, we are here and we're not going anywhere, I am not going anywhere. I've always been a loud lesbian and I'll always be.
Keep being loud, proud and gentle with other lesbians and be fierce with the ones who try to erase us.
Masculinity is a prison to you. I on the other hand am frolicking in it like a beautiful meadow.
not to put you on the spot, but this perspective is so foreign to me. could you list some things you like about it?
Smell of sawdust awesome
Arm wrestling
Singing with deepest voice you can
Love my dad <3
Strong muscles help friends
Gay
Craft beer yummy
Love my friends <3
I'll list some that I love as a black man, they aren't all inherently masculine but they can change when you're more masculine.
Going to the barber with friends and family
Flexing in the mirror. Everyone hypes you up!
Big hugs when a friend opens up
The nod of solidarity to other (normally black) men
Being naked. Not doing anything in particular but just chilling naked and being comfortable in your masculinity is great
RINGS!! I love wearing rings as a man, shit is awesome.
I remember years ago, long enough ago that I was still using either Tiktok or Instagram regularly, because that's where I saw this, long enough ago that unfortunately I do not remember the username, I saw an older trans woman responding to a comment asking "how come we see trans women from your generation, but never trans men?" And her response was simple. "Unfortunately, it's because most of them are dead." Between lack of safe and legal abortions (which, hey, look what's an issue again), the HIV/AIDs crisis (which still is lacking in approved treatments for trans men, and they're still likely to be denied PrEP/PEP even when they should be eligible as sexually active queer men), and how many of them chose to take their own lives after being forced into marriages and other women's roles, a lot of the trans men that should be elderly right now did not make it.
And now, when I find myself making the mistake of going on Instagram, I get to see trans men themselves talking about how historically, trans men didn't do anything for the community, and so we need to step up now. Which, first of all, that isn't true, but second of all, if trans men's contributions are lesser, that makes a lot of sense if we listen to that trans woman talking about the trans men she was in community with back in the day. It's very hard to advance the trans cause if you're not alive.
Anyway. It's a really chilling answer. "Where are all the elderly trans men?" "They're dead." And I just wish more people saw that tiktok and listened to it and really took it to heart, now that we're in the age of "well obviously trans men have it so much easier."
men of color, especially dark skinned men, and trans people are punished for masculinity in a way cis white men will never have to deal with, because masculinity is thought of as synonymous with autonomy so it is believed if that if your masculinity is "deviant" or "wrong" then your intentions to use your autonomy are also deviant and wrong. when people push back against language to describe this specific type of oppression, it is because they see cis white men as the default, and assume any discussion of how masculinity is treated by society is primarily about cis white masculinity.
who’s gonna tell tumblr that executive dysfunction is more than Not Doing Things?
okay
these are the executive functions. impairment of these functions is executive dysfunction
Oh.
OH
Girl, help. None of my executives are functioning
Nonbinary joy is my nearly 60 year old coworker getting super excited when I told her I wanted to use they/them instead of she/her and greeting me with "Hey mage!" instead of "Hey miss!" when I walk into the store, anyway never let anyone use age as an excuse for bigotry!
this is nonbinary joy!
Because I was now a man, I could not speak about what it was like to be a woman. Because I had been a woman, I could never really speak about what it was like to be a man. Do the math: I could not speak. It was a double erasure, a double bind, in which every experience I had was false, and so nothing I said was credible. I could no longer derive authority from my experiences before transition, and shouldn’t even cite them — I had never “really” been a woman, so those things hadn’t happened — but those experiences could always be weaponized against me to prove I wasn’t “really” the man I claimed to be. They call it erasure, when this happens. I wasn’t prepared for how literal the term was. Every day, I could feel myself disappear.
— Eraserhead: On writer's block and being a gender traitor by Jude Doyle
There are many good paragraphs but this stuck out the most:
"If “man” and “woman” are opposed and mutually exclusive categories, if men can only ever be predators and women can only ever be prey, then trans men can’t exist. We are logically impossible under the terms of the current system. You either “treat us like men” by voiding out half our lives, or you write us back into womanhood by denying our male identities. I knew all that, at least in theory, but when I came out, I actually saw my life story disappearing into other people’s blind spots. I watched myself become unthinkable in real time."
Also these:
"This wasn’t about accountability. This was people tactically forgetting my entire life,including incidents from my life they had personally witnessed or been involved in, so that they could shame me for transitioning. It was bad for me to be a man; if I was a man, I was a bad man, I was all the worst things men are. I was hulking, I was threatening, I was predatory, I was violent."
"I was treated as both genders, but only the most monstrous stereotype of each one."
Because that is exactly it. Anti-transmasculinity is being both erased and vilified, and then gaslit out of speaking about those experiences by the people who are erasing and vilifying you.
This resonated:
"The idea that I had always occupied a privileged position within patriarchy was, frankly, untrue; nor did it seem to me that a trans person was any less gender-marginalized than your average cis woman. What privilege I had was conditional, and these books were no guide. Men who wanted to “forge a positive masculinity” (and everyone was very clear that I needed one of those) were encouraged to get in touch with their “feminine sides.” Maybe that was healthy for cis guys, but I had been forced to do feminine things, and present in feminine ways, for the entirety of my young life. Whatever liberation I had achieved came from giving myself permission to stop."
As did the ending:
"When I write these days, I try to remind myself that whatever I’m afraid of saying is already true, and denial will not change it. I remind myself that the wrong people benefit from my silence, and will use it to write a version of my life I can’t recognize, or just write me out of the world. There is no established story or role for me; I belong to a category the world is still learning to imagine. I cannot account for the world as other people imagine it. I cannot give you every man’s story, every trans man’s story, every trans person’s story; I don't know them. What I do know is that every new story helps map the territory. All I can do for you, from where I'm standing, is tell you how things are."
