i bite my tongue ten times a day

𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐬𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡. 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐫. 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘣𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘪𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘺𝘩𝘲

[chlograce]

please tell me you aren't going to try to wrestle the wildlife around here? that was my lame attempt at a joke. in all seriousness - how has the trip been going for you so far? have you been just relaxing or on the go since we've arrived? (@hemsyofinfamy)

[hemsyofinfamy]

well, i was thinking about wrestling the wildlife, and now i'm not so sure. it was a good joke, honestly, and it made me cackle, so you're good! the trip has been amazing so far, it's been a nice break away from the kids, you know? so yeah, i've been relaxing. but now i'm looking to do some adventure things. what about you? are you having a good time?

[rebrosnahan]

Have you ever gone skydiving before? Because I'm curious about it but not sure if I could go through with it. I'm thinking about doing it with the group but don't want to go alone, so this is my way of asking if it's something you would do. Because if it is, would you be my skydiving buddy? / @hemsyofinfamy

[hemsyofinfamy]

i have gone skydiving before, and if you're looking for someone to go with you this time, sign me up. i'll be your skydiving buddy, and you'll see that it's one of the most fun things that you can do, the adrenaline is like no other. so i should warn you, once you do it, you'll want to keep on doing it!

[hemsyofinfamy]

i feel like i'm so beyond in the times, but i had some downtime this weekend and figured i'd watch some things i've been meaning to watch. my kids are with their mum, so i figured i'd watch some scary things. anyway, long story short, i watched heart eyes, and my god, that was a good movie. i loved every minute of it, and you and mason did such a good job in it too, though i'll admit that i was more drawn to watching you than mason. nothing against mason, and all, but you were clearly the star of the whole movie, and it's made me realize i need to watch more things with you in them, love. @oholt

[chrisewans]

Oh wow, the lesser handsome Chris? Starting strong, huh? Careful though, or I'll start a global poll just to settle that debate once and for all, and you know how the internet loves a good rivalry. I've been good, man! Keeping it pretty low-key lately. Spent a lot of time at home with Dodger. I went on holidays, too. And don't act like I'm the one ghosting you. I distinctly remember sending you a message months ago that got left on read. Yeah, you thought I wouldn't notice, huh? But if you're bored, I’ll take that as my cue to come up with some chaos to drag you into. Your turn. What’s been keeping you busy besides being the better-looking Australian version of me?

[hemsyofinfamy]

just calling it like i see it, evans, i can't help but think i'm more handsome than you. though, i would be curious to see who the internet said was the more handsome of the two of us, and you're right, the internet does love a good rivalry. i'm glad it's been good, and keeping low-key is the way to do it. plus, you went on holiday? tell me where! please, i would never leave you on read, so you must be talking about someone else. but we need to spend time together soon, because i have missed you a little. i'm always bored without you, mate, so please, come and bother me anytime you like. we'll spend time together in bora bora, right? get into some trouble together after a few drinks? and i've been working on a film in australia, so it's been nice that i've been near home. so that's mostly been keeping me pretty busy. though, being the better-looking version of you is hard work too.

[dejnes]

now this sounds like a great time. well, if bora bora is all beach and sun i say you do something the opposite of that to switch it up. right now, iceland is top of my list to visit, it looks amazing.

[hemsyofinfamy]

iceland? that was a good suggestion, and i was tempted to go there, but i ended up just staying in australia for a while to annoy my family and work. but now i'm really looking forward to bora bora, and it looks like we're going to be roommates. should i apologize now for anything i may or may not do?

[lcighannepinny]

yes! i adore my other parent friends but it's not quite the same. it's such a relief to find others who are in the twin trenches and fully get it. truly the wildest ride of my life. swear my sanity is only hanging on by a thread some days. ohh i don't envy you but also... a bit scared of when my girls get older. they just turned four in august. still in the little cute phase but the attitude and tantrums are also very real. at this point, i'll take any tips or advice i can get. sos.

[hemsyofinfamy]

that's how i feel, because i feel like unless you have twins, you really don't get it, right? and twin trenches, that's really the best way to describe it some days. i can imagine how your sanity is hardly hanging on some days, especially when they're still on the young side. i remember the toddler days so well. and i don't mean to worry about it, but yeah, as they get older, sometimes it gets a bit wilder. have they teamed up and conspired against you yet? i feel like since they're four they probably do, right? because mine did at four, and it was a crazy time.

[dlannaagron]

now that's would be wonderful, but i don't think i'm quiet as in demand as you, mister god of thunder. but if anyone gave me the absolute gift of working along side you then i would be all but too pleased. yes, okay, let's put our manifesting skills to good use and hopefully the world will pick up and answer our desperate calls. what kind of movie do you think we should star in? are you serious? that's the sweetest thing i have ever heard. every time i think people are done with glee, it always somehow swings back into relevancy again. i love that she wants to dress as quinn. hopefully she has the full cheerios outfit ready. for tips, she needs to highest ponytail achievable and it should be curled in one single ringlet and then she should walk around like she owns the place. quinn needs eyes on her, so she makes sure she's noticed by everyone around her.

[hemsyofinfamy]

even if you're not in as much demand as i am, which i think is a silly notion because you should be in as much demand as i am, that doesn't mean we shouldn't work together. but i'm glad you think it would be a gift to work along side of me, because i like hearing that a lot. we're going to make us working together happen, i just know it. and i'm not sure what kind of movie yet, part of me is thinking something with a little bit of action and a little bit of romance. what do you think? i am very serious! and seriously, i think it will always be relevant because it's such an iconic show, and kids are going to watch it because their parents watched it. she ended up dressing up as quinn for halloween, and thanks to your tips, she did amazing. she looked so cute and got so many compliments on her costume. so thank you for that. and she had quinn's attitude down pat too, it was great and scary to watch as a father.

[gaybuckybarnessss]

Limitless with Chris Hemsworth 2.03

[hemsyofinfamy]

are you sick of my face yet? because i feel like you might have to be sick of my face a little bit since we're filming together, especially when i know you're missing your man. we should do something crazy, like jump off a cliff, that will take your mind off missing matt. what do you think? @infamouslily

[hemsyofinfamy]

i always feel like i have to seek out other twin parents and become besties with them, because only they truly understand the struggle i go through sometimes when having twins. because it's such a wild ride, right? how old are your two now? because mine are 11, so just imagine what twin 11 year old boys are like. if you're thinking a pure nightmare, you're right. @lcighannepinny

[hemsyofinfamy]

i'm just patiently waiting for you and i to work together, beautiful, because i know we could make an amazing movie together. so let's try to manifest it happening, okay? because i'm sure if it's something we both want, it'll happen for us. also, my oldest decided she wanted to start watching glee a few months back and i fully supported the idea because it's a great show and i knew she would love it. well, love it was an understatement because the girl is obsessed. she's so obsessed that she swears she's dressing up as quinn for halloween, which makes me laugh a little. so if you can give her some tips on how to be quinn, i'd appreciate you. @dlannaagron

[hemsyofinfamy]

so my little girl is obsessed with all things k-pop right now, and stray kids seem to be what i'm listening to the most. but her crush on you, mate? it's a little unreal, so i'm doing the father thing of embarrassing her because she's 13 and saying she's got a crush on you, but also hopefully winning some points by talking to you, and maybe getting you to talk to her. that way she thinks i'm cool, and she gets to meet someone she loves so much. what do you think? @hwnghyunjins

[hemsyofinfamy]

i got to ask, do you think i'd be able to pull off the pink hair as well as you do? because it looks gorgeous on you, but i'm thinking i need a little change in life and wondering if pink hair might be it. what do you think? or am i too old for that nonsense? or should i try a different color? @madsphillips

[hemsyofinfamy]

how've you been, love? how's the little ones? they've got to be getting pretty big now, right? it always amazes me how fast kids grow, i swear. because mine are 13 and 11 now, and i'm still wrapping my mind around that. @infamyjennifer

[hemsyofinfamy]

if it isn't the lesser handsome chris! how've you been, mate? feels like you don't ever write or call anymore, and i'm always the one having to reach out to you, which makes me look like i'm desperate if you think about it. where's the love? tell me, though, what have you been up to? need you to fill me in on everything that i've possibly been missing out on. life is currently boring for me right now, and i need to live vicariously through others. @chrisewans

[hemsyofinfamy]

i'm currently filming right now, but the moment i'm done filming i think i want to take myself a holiday. if you could pick anywhere in the world to go to right now, where would it be? and i know, we've got that bora bora trip coming up, but i'm thinking of a holiday outside of that! @emma-hqs

[hemsyofinfamy]

mate, when are we going to be in a film together? because i think we need to be in one, and i think it needs to be a buddy cop film, honestly. i was thinking you can be the good cop that has all the funny lines, and i'll be the bad cop that's strict and plays by the rules but also is hilarious. because let's face it, i can't be in a film and not be funny sometimes, you know? @infamyisaac