F o r e g r o u n d

Sophia | 24 | Santa Barbara, California Finding the things in life that make me happy. And always stopping to enjoy the beautiful flowers along the way. Feel free to say hello.

[herbanyogi]

[herbanyogi]

Wine Merchant and Cafe | Los Olivos, CA

[herbanyogi]

Advice for college students:

• Don't copy other people's work. Cheating is a serious offense and is insulting to the person(s) actually putting in the time to learn the material and understand. Plus, when it comes time to take an exam, you'll be screwing yourself over. Good grades comes from good work ethic. • Furthermore, if you ask someone for help or what answer they got, do not take their word as law. Typically most people are not confident in their math or critical thinking skills, and therefore their problem solving will reflect that. Mistakes get made. I repeat: mistakes get made. Clarify and ask for detailed reasoning behind why they believe their answer is correct (and if they CAN'T, surely you should not be asking this particular person for their help!). I cannot emphasize this enough. Then take it upon yourself to verify their claim, and if you prove it wrong, discuss the conflicts in your results. Repeat until you are answering a question to the best of YOUR abilities, not someone else's. • KNOW THYSELF. Be confident, work hard, study, and stay proactive. These are the keys to success. Before relying on others, rely on yourself.

[herbanyogi]

🚫🌽🍳🍼🌾🌱

My doctor’s appointment went well today. I feel like a huge weight is lifted from my chest and I have more peace of mind.

Going through the chronology of my allergy symptoms and history with the doctor, she came to the conclusion on the following:

1) Doing a disciplined food elimination diet is an accurate way to assess allergies. If you are in tune with your body and have an idea of what the triggers may be, assuming there is valid evidence (not a hypochondriac diagnosis off of Web MD), this can sometimes yield better results than blood tests. False negatives are very plausible and DO happen. Even with this said, I am doing a general food allergy blood panel for further evidentiary support. And who knows, maybe they will find another allergy or food sensitivity to be aware of.

2) Irritable Bowel Syndrome can be both causes of diarrhea and constipation. It is very possible that I have been experiencing the latter symptom along with ones associated with certain food allergies. Upping water and fiber intake will remedy this, and perhaps taking digestive enzymes again on a regular basis (since I can no longer consume beneficial gut flora via yogurt).

3) Anemia is something that can fluctuate depending on your diet, and for females, their menstrual cycle. Because of fluctuations, I need to test my iron more regularly and supplement through iron rich foods - something I haven’t been nearly as conscientious about as I should be, given that my iron has been consistently low throughout my life.

The best news in all of this was being told my current weight of 123 lbs. The reason this matters is because before I was suspicious that gluten was wreaking havoc on my immune system and intestinal tract, my weight significantly dropped in my late teens. I went from 136 to 121 lbs my junior year of high school and struggled to maintain that during senior year. My freshman year of college, I lost another ten pounds. By sophomore year I was barely 100 lbs. Little did I know this was the hugest indication that I was suffering from extreme malnourishment. After the first SIX MONTHS of being gluten-free, I gained back 8 lbs. That was the small ounce of hope I needed to continue being vigilant about my diet. Then I added another ten pounds back (putting me at 118 lbs) over the next two years, keeping that steady weight until last summer. This is when I was experiencing another autoimmune crash due to a corn allergy. My weight fluctuated once again, but I was quicker to isolate the problem this time around.

In a year, I’ve gained 5 pounds of muscle. It took a lot of hard work and discipline in the kitchen and while grocery shopping to reach this point. Not because I was lifting weights or supplementing or increasing my caloric intake, but because I listened to my body and fed it properly. It meant reading and re-reading labels, throwing out or replacing cosmetics and toiletries, not eating at restaurants or food prepared by someone other than myself. Trial and error, over and over. I did a complete overhaul of my lifestyle for the benefit of my health. It’s been a slow healing process, but I’m glad to be on the right track instead of being lost and hopeless like I was just three short years ago. For the first time in Y E A R S, I feel better. And hope to continue feeling better.

[herbanyogi]

Quick update:

• The fall semester started last Monday. I’m currently enrolled in Physics, Chemistry, & Plant Biology (each with a lab). I want to be on top of my game so that my GPA and grades are ideal when it comes time to transfer. I NEED to be a competitive candidate - which means no slacking allowed. Everyone keeps telling me I’m crazy for taking three challenging and high-demand classes… But I’m keeping faith in myself no matter what anyone says. I can do this.

• “Fitness” is on the back burner. I’m so mentally exhausted that most days I have no energy left to lift or do exerting exercises. But I do put in time for a workout when I feel that I can and will enjoy it - just not every single day. For the first time I’m not feeling guilty about this because I feel comfortable with where I’m at. Yoga and stretches are the most reasonable thing I can manage with my schedule, AND THAT’S OKAY. I ride my bike about 40 miles a week commuting between school and work, and I need to give myself credit for that. In the past I beat myself up for not being more active and I’m not accepting that negative inner commentary anymore.

• Despite my dietary restrictions, I’m finding lots of yummy alternatives! Many product reviews and recipes to post at another date. I have also found solace in Indian cuisine because it still manages to be the only one that is comfort food + cheap + allergen free. Win, win, win. {👆🏼See food baby above}

• I am FINALLY seeing a doctor tomorrow! I found a clinic that gives discounted rates for low-income individuals (I’m talking $50-$150 per visit)!!! I’m gluten-, corn-, wheat-, dairy/lactose-, egg-, AND soy-free. It’s time for a medical professional to advise me on these food allergy issues, which is both exciting and nerve-wracking at the same time.

My hair is wrapped, teeth are brushed, and I’m ready for bed. I wish you all a very pleasant night (or day!). I’ll make the extra effort to reply to messages/ asks by this weekend, and hopefully in the future I’ll be back to posting photos on a regular basis. I have some yoga tutorials in the works and lots of beautiful snapshots to share from over the summer.

Xoxoxo 💋

[herbanyogi]

A morning backbend to wake up the spine.

[herbanyogi]

It's 1 a.m. and I just got out of the shower. As I'm about to put my pajamas on, my boyfriend rolls over in his sleep and very clearly says "Suck on it". This wouldn't be particularly funny or attention grabbing except that he said this while groping his dick and is so deep in slumber that he HAS to be dreaming. I shook him to see if he was playing around but he is absolutely, positively dead asleep. I'm fucking hysterical right now.

[herbanyogi]

I don't take birth control anymore, sixinchlies. I quit taking them about 4 years ago. I never knew they contained lactose though! I've been lactose-intolerant my entire life, but my reactions have changed from being internal (digestive issues) to external (dermal rashes). What sort of reactions do you get? Thank you balancingegoasaleo! I eat extremely clean for the most part, except the occasional times when my partner and I (and/or his family) go out to dinner at a gluten-free friendly restaurant. I'm not going to be making those exceptions anymore, sadly! Your flawless diet and eating habits are what I aspire to. I appreciate you always being such a guide with food allergies. You have bestowed so much of your wisdom upon me.

[herbanyogi]

Current feels. 😖😔😫

The last four weeks have been hellish for me in regards to my health. I was experiencing severe migraines on a daily basis for 3 weeks. I decided to cut out dairy to see if that was the cause. My headaches fortunately went away.

But then last weekend, my partner accidentally “glutened” me because I had a sip of his cocktail which contained soju (a wine made from barley and rice). He and I didn’t realize until it was too late. I later broke out with dermatitis herpetiformis and a case of fatigue and drowsiness. It hasn’t gone away for a week, and I of course made the terrible decision to consume a little bit of dairy. I thought I would be okay eating a spoonful of Greek yogurt because it has beneficial bacteria - but nope. My body is telling me otherwise.

I have reached a point where I have to either live with painful, pus-y open sores on my face and other parts of my body, or make the necessary dietary restrictions. Starting today I am going to be lactose-free*. If that doesn’t help, I’m going to cut out soy* then eggs* to see if they are the culprit.

You might be thinking: “Go to a doctor!” “Get an allergy test!”. Both are things I have thought of and both are things I quite literally cannot afford. I have to wait until the fall to apply for medical insurance so I don’t have to pay out of pocket for tests. In the meantime, the best case scenario is that I do a trial run of cutting out specific foods to see how my body reacts.

My fingers are crossed that I can get to a healthier state. If anyone has recommendations for food substitutions or recipes, please share! I am also gluten-free and corn-free which rules out A LOT (a list of about 100 common ingredients). I will have to get creative in the kitchen and stick to simple, and even raw, foods.

*I suspect these to be the possible causes because as a child I was highly allergic to dairy products and eggs. I grew tolerant to them with age, until now. Soy is a suspect because my mom, younger brother, and sister are all extremely allergic.

[herbanyogi]

Dinner Part II, by firelight. Who says you have to be camping to roast marshmallows? ⛺️

[herbanyogi]

Dinner Part I, by candlelight. Chilean Cab Sauv, grilled chicken with chipotle barbeque sauce, peppers, onions, on a bed of spinach.

[herbanyogi]

Thank you, sweeterthanabumblebee. You are so right! I’m a tortoise, not a hare. And it’s okay to be either. 😊🐢💛

I love you V! I’m proud of you too sixinchlies! I am glad to have you as my friend (and co-captain on this very rocky boat ride). We’ll keep each other afloat. 😘

[herbanyogi]

This is what my life currently looks like.

I go to class four days a week, work 8 hour shifts Friday - Sunday. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Sometimes I get down on myself because my daily activities are not exciting. I haven’t had time for yoga or exercise lately. It’s really hard to not feel like I’m missing out while people I know are out traveling in different countries, camping, surfing, going to festivals & concerts, or in general, having more fun than I am.

I have little to no expendable income, so the highlights consist of getting to veg out and watch a few hours of television or a movie. I get a lot of shit from others my age for not having my degree yet because they do; I get pressure from family members to graduate because I’m approaching my mid-twenties. I am done trying to appease those around me who think I am too old to be in college still.

I can’t compare my progress or success to others, and no one else should be comparing theirs to mine. I have been through a lot to be where I am, and I have to persevere every single day. I work hard so my younger siblings have something and someone to look up to - at times that is the only motivation I have. I ask myself all the time if the studying, exams, and stress are going to pay off. It might take me longer than the average person, but I am doing the fucking best that I can.

[jayronningaway]

I am 100% in your shoes too and it’s a terrible feeling. Please remember that you’re doing your best and what other people say/think doesn’t matter because they don’t know your situation like you do.

[herbanyogi]

Thank you jayronningaway. It's comforting to know I'm not alone in feeling this way or facing the financial/social/emotional struggles that comes with being a working student. I wish there were more people on my team, rooting for my success; rather than questioning if I will ever finish college and making me feel bad (intentionally or not) about the fact that I haven't yet. I appreciate you reaching out. It means so so much. xoxo

[herbanyogi]

This is what my life currently looks like.

I go to class four days a week, work 8 hour shifts Friday - Sunday. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Sometimes I get down on myself because my daily activities are not exciting. I haven’t had time for yoga or exercise lately. It’s really hard to not feel like I’m missing out while people I know are out traveling in different countries, camping, surfing, going to festivals & concerts, or in general, having more fun than I am.

I have little to no expendable income, so the highlights consist of getting to veg out and watch a few hours of television or a movie. I get a lot of shit from others my age for not having my degree yet because they do; I get pressure from family members to graduate because I’m approaching my mid-twenties. I am done trying to appease those around me who think I am too old to be in college still.

I can’t compare my progress or success to others, and no one else should be comparing theirs to mine. I have been through a lot to be where I am, and I have to persevere every single day. I work hard so my younger siblings have something and someone to look up to - at times that is the only motivation I have. I ask myself all the time if the studying, exams, and stress are going to pay off. It might take me longer than the average person, but I am doing the fucking best that I can.

[herbanyogi]

Kitty pile! 😻

[herbanyogi]

[herbanyogi]