why is it when you go to a hair salon as a transmasc/nb person and go âi want something very short and simple. masculine. hereâs a photo of a man. thatâs how i want my hair to look.â without fail your middle aged hairdresser is like âyes. right. i know exactly what youâre looking for. let me just âŠ.. snip snipâ and you come out of there like 2007 kate gosselin
Ok so: Iâm cis female but had this problem, in that I could never get them to cut my hair short enough. I eventually found ways to get them to cooperate though - and this was with hair I was sporting from 15-23, so you can probably get them to take you seriously. Keep in mind, though, that a lot of these tips will involve recognizing that youâve already been misgendered and voluntarily running with that.
First of all, just go to a barbershop instead of a hair salon, if you can. Itâs cheaper anyway, and youâre far more likely to get what you want from either a place where every employee has ten tattoos minimum, or from someone whoâs mis-aging you not misgendering you
Barring that, e.g. If thereâs only one shop nearby or your parents control where you go, pick the stylist with the wildest hair or most tattoos
If you can do so, make yourself sound like a huge lesbian the whole time. I could never get a middle aged white woman to actually take clippers my head if I hadnât already talked about my (usually imaginary) girlfriend
If you like having your hair clipped/shaved, find out what numbers they use on you next time someone does it right, then tell everyone moving forward. Some still wonât believe you, but saying âI want a 2 into a 5â was always a lot more effective than âI want it shaved upâ
Donât tell them itâs fine until it is. I know this is something weâre socialized into accepting but this is true regardless of who you are and what hair cut youâre getting. If youâre not satisfied, say so. So what if they get annoyed? Theyâre not doing their job right. Youâre paying for a service, you deserve it done the way you want.
On a related note, bribery will get you everywhere. If you live in a place where tipping is normal, and you can afford it, then come prepared with extra cash. If they do it right without you complaining, tip them well and say âhey, youâre the only stylist whoâs actually listened, thank you.â If they need more convincing - especially if your parents are the ones paying and you know theyâre trying not to piss them off - pull out a $10 or so and go âlook, seriously, I will tip you extra if you just cut it boy-shortâ. It motivated a few ladies for me, when it was an option.
If all else fails, make up a reason you need it that short. Youâre playing a character in the school play. You want to piss off your parents/ex/sister. Protest. âMy friend has cancer and I want to make her feel less aloneâ. Yeah, lying sucks, but sometimes you gotta.
Hope that helps!!
