☭

yuri me yuri like me yuri come I shitpost and vent alot and im pathetic so give me likes and you'll make me happy!!!!!!

[himedanshier]

Intro...gulps....

HELLO this is my vent slash shitpost blog and everything i post what I want so yes there's mentions of self harm and suicidal thoughts and all serious topics

I block freely with no actual reason required dont get mad im sad

Send asks i like them and they make me happier

I AM A COMMUNIST so that should tell you where I stand annnnnnddd thats it I think oh also im a he if my user doesnt give it away

Also I dont dress in jirai I attempt 90s street fashion sorry does this consider me a poser

Anyways I always follow back

[himedanshier]

I can’t stop fucking thinking about it

My other best friend admitted that he wanted to kill himself last year and almost did it a couple times

Another person I could’ve failed 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣why does no one tell me anything 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[himedanshier]

I wnat to relapse but I have a doctor's appointment in like 2 weeks and its a physical 🫩🫩🫩

They literally see the bite scar on my hands and dont care so maybe thdy won't care about thd cuts either

Whatever I dont want to take my chances ill cut after

[himedanshier]

You can only say so many things until you start pissing me off with the absolutely bullshit you are spewing to me right nkw like god I knkw I complain but what the fuck is even the issue here you have it so lucky dude JUST LIVE THE MOMENT AND STOP TELLING ME ABOJT JT

Whatever probably ruined my chances of you telling me anhtbing ever again but if its gonna be like this dont get weird when I call you out for how stupid it is like wtf

[himedanshier]

Stop it stop it stop trying to get close to me you’ll always be nothing but a fucking school friend you’ll never reach the love I have for him just leave me alone when I blocked you that should’ve been a fucking hint this is why your other friends stopped hanging around you because you act like this

I feel so mean but I cannot bring myself to care about the friends I have for school and my old friend from middle school I can tell she doesn’t like me hhahahhahhahahahahahah just leave me alone leave me leave me leave me I don’t want to drag you down I want to die hahahahhahah what’s the point of living anymore hahahhahahah deleted all my messages complaining ahhhahaa you were amazing yesterday I love it when you act different

I want to just die already fuck me why will no one save me when at the same time I don’t want to be saved 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Sorry no theme don’t have it saved on my iPad

[himedanshier]

Hi! I really like your blog theme it's so cute! What are some of your favorite kinds of candy?

-@explosive--expletive

THANK YOUUUFHDHHDHD hehehdhnejdf..

Im actually not a big fan of sweets im more of a savory person but if I had to choose then probably lollipops especially the ones with gum inside

[himedanshier]

If my life doesnt get better by the time im 17 im killing myself

If someone that I can have skin to skin contact with someone who understands me someone who will stay with me forever someone who will never change someone who will love me for me someone who will help me get better someone who can handle me comes then ill keep going forever

But I know dat wont happen haha! Better live the best final 2 years of my life🤣🤣🤣🤣🫱🫱🫱🫱🫱

[himedanshier]

Called the suicide hotline fuckkkk that lady was just as sweet as the last one I love you whoever you are and I hope your happiness is everlasting

[himedanshier]

I dont know how to feel right now my best friend attempted suicide and got sent to the mental hospital I felt betrayed because we were supposed to do it together but today we got back in contact and shes changed so much shes on anti depressants and acts differently she talks about the people she met there and how they treated her with so much love and how she even developed a crush

Im sk happy shes okay and im happy shes getting better but why do I feel so empty now she told me that I needed to stop cutting that we were gonna be happy together bjt j just dont feel it that sadness together us what made me so attached tk her she promised we would be together forever and we would only need eachother

Im sk fuckign selfish i should die why am I even thinking this i feel like I cant tell her my problems anymore since I dont wanna make her relapse

We can't even meet up anymore cuz her mom saw me cutting and thinks we have a suicide pact which yeah we did but she doesnt want me talking to her anymore I just wanna die sk bad im dragging eheryone around me down

I dont want tk hurt her I dont want tk hurt anyone with my problems that are sk pointless I just Wana to die the world would be sk much better off without me

I hate everything why am j acting like this whh am I so hurt over something that shouldn't hurt me everyone js getting better but me everything i hold dear is leaving md I dont knowwhat to do

If we wanted to meet up thej I would have to tell my mom everything I dont want tk tell anyone about my problems their so point less

Im having another panic attack as im typing this goddd I'm so pathetic I just want to be happy it just wans live a. Regular life why cant I be regular why can't I find the motivation to be happy

[himedanshier]

Im not his😂😂😂😂😂favorite😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂anymore😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂whyyyyy would you dayyy that tooooooo meee😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[himedanshier]

omg your blog is so pretty????!!?!?

THANNNKKKK YOUUUU GAHHHHHHWHHSHRHRUEUDHH!!!!!!!!!

[himedanshier]

Why do you get so defensive over jusr a small pointless joke how much time have you spent with everyone else that you forgot how im like and how i joke

[himedanshier]

Yeah keep talking about you friends I hate them so sp so so so so so so so so so so much

once again you come in and never respond to my messages that I sent before you woke up like you used to

why are you getting tired of me why do you do this to me why do you hate me how is me getting excited desperate I dont get jt I cant even cry anymore about it I just want to keep cutting forever

[himedanshier]

HAII FELLOW JIRAI!!!

i like ur esc theme blog

reminds me of my esc which i spoil a lot

like her

:3

okiee byeee

- ur light fury :3

Heheheh...THANK HOUUUUUUU shes everything i am..had to pay tribute to her somehow

You have her costume...IM SO JEALOUS YOU ARE A LUCKY TOOT

[himedanshier]

WAAAAAH !!!!! A JIRAI COMRADE ˃̶͈◡˂̶͈ i never thought id see the day ......

YOURE🫵 my new best friend (/nf) sorry, i dont make the rules hehe

WOAAHHUWUHH I NEVER THOIGHT ID SEE THE DAY EITHER capitalism makes me mad and im currently in the process of reading The State and Revolution.....then I got distracted by this really good eternalberry fanfjc boi CHILLLL I GENUINELY will finish reading jt😅😅😅 STOP THROWING TOMATOS

And YES PLEASE!!! Why would there be rules anyways thats a dictatorship slash joke

[himedanshier]

INTENSE RANT HAHHAHAHHA FUCK YOU FUCK YOU I HATE YOH

I dont fucking get it like seriously?!?!?×?,÷&$&&÷&"&&$ you are an ASSHOLE BOTH OF YOU I TRY SO HARD TO HOLD MY WORDS TO MAKE AURE YOU ALWAYS FEEL HAPPY AROUND ME i avoid talking about my issues since I know your guys are worse...why cant you just love me how I love you

YOUUUUU YOUUU YOUUUU UOUUU YOUUUUUUUU

you make me want to die you're the reason I started cutting in the first place ypure the season i had my first panic attack youre the reason why i called the suicide hotline I do all these things to myself to make sure I dont say things I dont mean around you

I make you my top priority every day ive told you how much you mean to me I guess no matter how much I love someone they'd get tired of me eventually how am I your favorite when you say you have other favorites....how do you forget to say I love you for 5 months and only do it now once in a blue moon..you say you forget but you didnt forget for almost 2 years

You barley respond to my messages when you wake up instead bringing up your friends constantly and how much fun you have with them when I talk about my interests you change the topic to talk about your own

When I respond quickly for you and only you you make me wait for hours

Do you not want to send your art because you found someone else to send it to? Am I so boring that I cant even look at it anymore? What about the plans of calling you made and when I agreed to them you just somehow made sure to not respond to the dates of when yohre free HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA YOURE SO FUCKING FUNNY BUT YOU LOVE ME RIGHT BUT IM YOUR GUARDIAN ANGEL RIGHT??????? OH YOURE SO EXCITED TO TALK TO ME EVERY DYA BUT YOU DECIDE TO NEVER MAKE TIME FOR ME I dont knkw what to fucking do anymkre

Despite all this i still have so much love for you

I noticed all this happening during November and probably earlier than that and I just want you to go back how you used to be why cant you just love me

[himedanshier]

Everytime I think about how hes treating me now i look at the album I created of all the messages he sent saying very sweet things and while I use to get happy when I reread them

now I cant bare the thought too to see how much he changed in just a year makes me want to RELAPSE SIGHS