h :)

22 | she/her | my return to tumblr | twitter: @L0N3LYMUSE

[blond-shell]

💿ULTIMATE PLAYLIST CHALLENGE💿 ↪ [1/12] albums ♡ Badlands – Halsey

[tiredandlonelymuse]

Original tumblr girl you wouldn’t understand

[hnnhbe]

the blueprint

[tiredandlonelymuse]

The early nights are confusing for the soul, but the forced retirement might do me some good. We went to a dance party. We were the youngest ones there and it was beautiful watching people a decade older than me find joy in nostalgia. I loved Anora. I miss New Jersey. I have been making Christmas ornaments by hand for my future family. I have been taking care of my mother. She has good days and bad. All of this in the few moments between the work and the work and the work. Confetti shot out of a Canon once the crowd already left the building. I feel as though it was all for nothing. It’s a dry, cold, itch. Maybe I’ll hide again until a tour when the sun comes back. Maybe I won’t make a sound. Maybe I’ll sleep. Maybe I’ll choose different this time with my restart to zero, my bonus life I pulled from a box. And pull from a box with a needle every 3 weeks. Maybe maybe maybe. Maybe I fixed everything so I could do this one thing again, without realizing that one thing was what needed fixing. I am tired and I forgot how to have fun. I complain too much and I should keep it to myself, I’ve been told a lot the past few weeks. But the thing is that I can’t. I have an unrelenting ache and a never ending whine that must crank out of me like a tornado siren in the dark. That’s what’s been wrong with me the entire time, couldn’t they see? I’ve always needed to be seen to exist. But now they don’t see me, and I’m still existing. Perhaps, problem solved. Regrettably.

[hnnhbe]

i related to this way too much :( we love u so much h

[almightaylor]

Ohh this stings

[mothercain]

it is truly so pathetic how much america hates women

[youledmehere]

[toomuchtimelost]

The Real Dream by Colette (1975)

[tiredandlonelymuse]

i loved one direction with an all-consuming force when i was younger. it hurts deeply to mourn someone you were a massive fan of as teenager, and became a peer of as an adult.

i know people change and grief is unsure or complicated when it’s attached to a fond memory or the feeling a person gave you and not tangibly the person themself. i can see many of you on here are struggling with that right now and i understand.

a few years ago i purchased a home that Liam previously owned. there were rumors the house was haunted. He assured me it was not, and i believed him. because i know the ghosts that haunt us aren’t tethered to buildings. They live in parts of us that are harder to reach and they go wherever we do.

as a parent, a fellow artist, and a fan, i simply cannot fathom this untimely loss. my heart goes out to his family, friends, and the fans. 💔

[gabrrto]

the eras; by me

(@artzroberto on ig)

[tiredandlonelymuse]

Hey this made me cry thank you

[biology-online]

[kosmogrl]

[hlseylq]

catherinepowell: MTV VMAs (Backstage) | Elmont, NY #VMAs Shot for @mtv 

[sustancy]

[gacougnol]

Sally Gall

Caitlin, 1996

[fashionlandscapeblog]

Ivan Pokidyshev

The nostalgia of the infinite, 2024

Oil on canvas.

[hnnhbe]

I struggle to sleep and I struggle to stay awake. I’m living a life of chronic exhaustion

[hnnhbe]

and I know everyone says when the time is right I’ll get what’s meant for me but everyday I’m feeling worse and mentally struggling even more so at what point is the time going to be right when I’m struggling to even be in the present