BITCHIN'!

hollis triton. 21. walt u.

[hollistriton]

So, I know I always do a Thanksgiving dinner for those who don’t go home to their families, but this year I’m doing a Christmas one too! I’m even making little to-go plates that you can take home to your friends, or you can buy a massive Christmas dinner that I will personally deliver to your cottage if your entire cottage is staying in Walt. Included is a Christmas ham, deviled eggs, green beans, mashed potatoes and gravy, and your choice of one extra side. This holiday is going to be a fun one, guys!

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: I have absolutely no idea how much anything is, but if you'd just told me to buy a set for my cottage I would've bought you some. Seriously? I made that great an impression on you?

Hollis: Some knives can be thousands of dollars just for ONE knife! It’s crazy!!!! I buy good quality stuff but not that good. Speaking of you being so generous, I have to make a meal similar to this ancient culture I’m studying and I need you to taste test! Yeah? Why is that so hard to believe?

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: You're very kind. You bringing them back and forth all the time was literally insane but at least you don't have to worry about that now! Oh, how long has that been your plan?

Hollis: I should’ve just bought two sets but that shit is expensive. Do you know how much a good knife can be? Pretty much the day we met, but it felt like revealing myself that early would be coming on too strong.

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: Well the only prize you get for winning, is me. So ha ha right back. How did you even leave just half of your measuring cups with me? The rest of forever? Are you being hyperbolic or?

Hollis: That's a great prize! I don't know! I guess when packing I just skipped over some. I was bringing them back and forth so much it was bound to happen. Well, I don't want to live on my own and unless we find someone else we just love living with I would just assume we'd be roommates.

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: You have stuff all over my cottage, but you're not wrong. And it wouldn't hurt to live with you instead of the absolute Neanderthals I've been subjected to over the last few years.

Hollis: Ha ha! I'm right! I win! Honestly, it was getting so confusing remembering what was at my cottage and what was at yours. I left HALF of my measuring cups at yours. How was I supposed to measure 1/4th of a cup of anything at my place!? Yeah, I liked my roommates a lot but I'm totally fine with you being my roommate for the rest of forever.

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: What exactly would change about our lives if we actually started living together. Are we not attached at the hip enough?

Hollis: We would actually have our stuff in the same place and not have an overnight bag all the time? And if we want to spend all our time together it’d be easier if we actually lived in the same cottage.

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Hollis: Okay, so you know how the cottage switch ups are coming home? What if we requested to live together?

[hollistriton]

serenitytriton‌:

I mean this with the utmost sincerity and as a compliment, but you are one of the most ideal examples of both who I hope my daughter is one day and what I hope she never does. Did you actually get your haircut or are you wearing it as a token of pride out of spite?

Aw, that’s so sweet. I hope your daughter is like me too, I’m a lot of fun. My extensions were what burned mainly, so I just took them out and replaced them, but it’s the principle!

[hollistriton]

wondertriton‌:

How’d your hair get to the fire part of a stove? I don’t use stoves ever so maybe I’m missing lots, but isn’t the fire kind of low down? What were you doing exactly?

Well, I recently got extensions and they are hella long. I forgot about that while doped up on cold medicine so I leaned down to check what I was making and unwittingly caught my hair on fire. 

[hollistriton]

If anyone was wondering, yes a stove top can burn off the ends of your hair. Also don’t try and cook after you’ve taken night time cold medicine because you will be out of it enough to actually burn off the ends of your hair. And after burning off the ends of your hair, don’t call your best friend for help because he will just apathetically tell you to get a haircut and that you shouldn’t have been cooking in the first place which you already KNEW BUT DID IT ANYWAYS!

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: I adore you, Hollis. 🙄 Your personal style, not including the aprons, is fine and decidedly not tragic. Because I have no idea what would happen if the two of you met and I'd rather not find out.

Hollis: I knoooow. I just like to make you say it. Would you still be friends with me if I had terrible style? What's the worst that could happen? We don't like each other? Big whoop!

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: I don't think I could ever fall off the Hollis wagon. I just prefer to imagine what goes under your hideous aprons, not the aprons themselves. My mother is nothing but petty feuds and exquisite fashions. No. Probably not.

Hollis: You liiiiiiiike me. 😏 I feel like my normal style is okay. I don’t think I’m totally tragic. Why not! I’d let you meet my family if you could breathe underwater!

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: You've been my muse this entire time, do you not pay any attention to me? Uh huh. I'm sure there are some things I like enough to show you. I'd show you The September Issue or The Devil wears Prada but the De Vils are currently not on the best terms with Anna Wintour so I'll think of something else. It doesn't count if you don't know either!

Hollis: I do! I just figured since you weren’t making a line of aprons that you’d kinda fallen off the Hollis wagon! Your mom is scary and not because she wanted puppy fur but because every time you talk about her she’s got some kind of beef with someone. Am I ever gonna meet her?

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: I'm not, it was a perfect face. If I could translate how perfect your face was to a design, I'd never have to work again. Do you even know any youths? It's a reference to a movie, if I liked it more I'd show it to you, but it's not worth it. I just me you were sneakily training me.

Hollis: Aw, I’m your muse. I knew I was good for something! I know various youths! Just not super well. Do you like anything enough to show it to me? Oh, I could’ve been! But it would’ve had to be so sneaky that even I didn’t know I was training you.

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: You couldn't have known. Which is a good thing because I still 😏 when I think about your face when you realized. Ew. What youth do you know that says boo'd up? Thanks, I guess you Miyagi'd me with all those forced hang outs.

Hollis: I'm so mad about that! I wish I could've made a better face! One that was more powerful and blase than pure shock and annoyance. I don't know! The youths! I don't know who or what a Miyagi is but it's probably a good thing.

[prettylittleliarsxxxx]

★ Hanna Marin ★     ★ 7x19 “Farewell, My Lovely” ★

[hollistriton]

TEXT || HOMIEN

Damien: Yeah, pretty much. But it was still worth you eating your own words about how fated you and your match were going to be. Nah. Not really, you're a good date.

Hollis: How was I supposed to know? You'd think there were a ton of eligible bachelors for me to get paired with! I guess everyone is already boo'd up as the youths say. You are too.