Things Homer Simpson would Say or Do

[orcboxer]

got a crick in my neck and a frog in my throat and a chip on my shoulder and a stick up my ass and now you're gonna stand there puttin words in my mouth? haven't I been through enough?

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

HJ Simpson would say this

[dogpuppy]

[shark-tranny]

american describing weather: ok so imagine a donut

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You already know this situation is Homer as hell

[anphivenas]

Your father use to roleplay as a tape worm for my pleqsure

[cheddar-baby]

hope he did a good job at least. Didn't embarrass the whole family.

[anphivenas]

He strutted his shit kinda

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If i may break format for a post; Marge and Bart ass conversation

[misericordiia]

the eyes of someone who just vomited carry a vulnerable acceptance to grief only known in portraits of saints

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Homer Simpson would say this

[jenheadjen-deactivated20240221]

Reverse Air Bud movie about a human basketball player who, on a technicality, enters and wins the westminster dog show

[appendingfic]

This almost feels like something that would have happened to hans doofenschmirtz

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I know who he beat

[clayjokes]

The police pull my lifeless body from a lake but I’m wearing the funniest hat they’ve ever seen and they can’t stop laughing and keep dropping me back into the water

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This would happen to homer

[goomba-stomper]

I went to every afterlife and there wasn't a single goomba in any of them. Where the fuck are these things going

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

Homer would say and do this

[contemptible-scoundrel]

[doesn't understand jacking off] and I'm supposed to... touch my penis? [shaking my head and smiling, murmuring to myself] touching my own penis... [chuckles] what will they come up with next

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You may not like it but Homer Simpson would say this

[himejoshikomaru]

fool.! you dare to oppose the stormbringer.?! even now as i roam this accursed city. collecting what is rightfully mine.?! the fevered thoughtscapes of this realm shall tremble at my name.!!. yes. yes. hee. hee. hee.!

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

Homer Simpson, and I cannot stress this enough, would say this

[alexandriaocasiocortez]

Being a flop changed my life. The world is not my oyster, I am glowing. I walked into a pole this morning. There's very little I wouldn't do for $1,000

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

You know Homie has said this

[imdrinkingmiso]

I am doing whatever the opposite of locked in is .

[taavicleric]

I am locked out. I am in the parking lot. The rain is coming.

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

Homer simpson kind of sentence

[insomniac-arrest]

brought nothing to the gun fight, and everyone is really embarrassed for me. they keep trying to hand me a knife or a really big rock but I tell them I am not a charity case and die immediately

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

Homer Simpson cause of death

[maidthings]

youre all too scared of radiation

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

Nuclear Safety Inspector Homer J Simpson has absolutely said this

[anthonycolonthree]

(guy who's not getting anything done voice) I need to learn every skill and all information

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Mister Simpson comma Homer would say this

[tothechaos]

any tips for developing discipline? ive been going through life on a lackadaisical hedonist build but ive got a bunch of mysterious problems that i may or may not be at fault for

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

Homer would say this but not right away

[carnelianfoxx]

Piracy is a “victimless crime”? Idk i was kinda hoping there would be a victim. I want the mouse dead

[assasinationbycarscoveredinhamrs]

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

Homer Simpson approved ✔️

[saltoncity]

work tomorrow is one of the worst things that can happen to you

[homersimpsonwouldsaythis]

A Homer Simpson type of sentence