will bark for attention

⛧ 18+ Only • Read Pinned • House • IWTV • Ao3 • Be Kind Always ⛧

[afatlittledog]

Please read me. 🩷

Must be 18 or older to view this blog.

All trespassers will be blocked on sight.

I go by Boo but just call me Puppy until we're more familiar, please. I'm some sort of puppygirl, dogthing with a cunt.

I am nearing thirty if it matters that bad to you.

I'm Queer but I don't know much more than that. All girls are welcome and men will pay 150¥ in silence, so to speak.

DMs are open to all but especially mutuals. I like attention and will take it from pretty much anyone that's nice enough.

Be kind always.

I will also block you for the following:

No age in your bio

A H*gwarts house in your bio/url

Being a terf

Being an asshole

Anything else I feel like

If you don't like it, bye. That simple.

Have a lovely day. 🩷

[sharkgirldick]

Playing 7 minutes in heaven with a random guy from the party. Instead of catching us making out, though, I've got him face down ass up on the floor moaning into the carpet while I split him open.

I give a thumbs up to everyone watching.

[sharkgirldick]

"You're not supposed to fuck in the closet!!"

It's called 7 minutes in heaven, isn't it? You heard him moaning, he was definitely in heaven.

[sharkgirldick]

I'm sorry for making him squirt all over the floor, though. In my defense, I didn't know he was going to do that.

You can send me the carpet cleaning bill.

[blackerthings]

MEGAN THEE STALLION Instagram Story March 6th, 2022

[oidial]

anything/anyone can be a sheep if you believe

shes a border collie!!! so she takes medicine to dampen her herding instinct!!! except when she doesn't.... ! all sheep* to the sheep corner NOW

*sheep/ sheep adjacent

and some backgrounds! some of you have not realized these aren't apart of the comic and thought i was doing some scary horror 'they weren't real' bit, so i have added a WARNING! <3

OK, TEEHEE, BYE!!!!!

[jessebloom]

this almost makes me want to go back to law school

[ozempicofficial]

[mandywondering]

I got curious, so without looking up the reddit thread because I hate reddit, I went to the list of Barbie's careers. Because of course people have dated lists of those.

Her first 28 years are fairly tame, until we reach 1987's Canadian Mountie Barbie. Reasonable odds for a cop, even if they're not a USAmerican cop.

in 1991, we get US Air Force Pilot Barbie, US Marine Corps Sergeant Barbie, US Navy Petty Officer Barbie. There's also 1992's US Army Barbie, if those guys were feeling left out. I'm also ignoring the 1989 US Army Barbie because that one is 100% a stolen valour runway look, not a uniform.

Going to run my autism over those four.

US Navy Petty Officer Barbie is wearing quartermaster's rating insignia, so no combat for her.

US Army Barbie is wearing an airborne maroon beret with no rank insignia that I could see, but she's loaded down with medical supplies, so I'm gonna say combat medic, but only as many kills as her other medical endeavours.

US Air Force Pilot Barbie is wearing a jacket that looks like a Top Gun tie-in. The unit patch is just the USAF coat of arms, and the name patch says she's a Captain. VERY confusingly, the plane on the box art is an F-5, which had just recently been retired. But its USAF usage was almost all in the OPFOR Aggressor squadrons, which is... "come play enemy planes for our training exercises".

US Marine Corps Sergeant Barbie is wearing E-5 Sergeant's insignia, and three medals (she's in dress uniform). To my eye, and allowing for badly printed colours, looks like Navy and Marine Achievement Medal, Marine Corps Good Conduct Medal, and the South West Asia Service Medal. The first two are fairly obvious "Barbie Is Well Behaved" stuff, but uh. That last one though?

USMC Barbie was in Desert Storm.

And if she was in a support role there, well, 1993 gave us USAmerican Cop Barbie. Case closed.

[nerdynarratives]

[aflo]

[elexecution]

tomorrow is dog day afternoon night at the bar. they are going to turn off the a/c and lock us inside.

[cybelusreverie]

notice that no one on MTV Cribs has an emergency eyewash station

[foldbaron]

[buttpoems]

[kingcatnine]

known booboo moveset:

booboo wheel

booboo missile

booboo shield

[cannibalchicken]

[evilvillain123456789]

a pit of dread forms in your stomach as you parse my "evil baby on board" decal and realize you have a moral duty to rear end my vehicle as hard as you can

[zoesupreme]

I have started following the journey of a German soccer fan in the US for the world cup

[zoesupreme]

[zoesupreme]

[zoesupreme]

[zoesupreme]

@laeffy the euros have found buc-ee's

[zoesupreme]

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

doomscrolling tiktok together and I turn to you and ask, "why doesn't your algorithm recommend any videos with Black people?"

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

doomscrolling tumblr and I turn to you and ask, "why don't you reblog anti-racism when it makes you feel uncomfortable?"

[markovchaingang]

RULES FOR DATING MY DAUGHTER:

my daughter cannot, through action or inaction, harm a human or allow a human to come to harm

a daughter at rest or in constant motion remains at rest or in constant motion unless acted upon by another force

daughters are never created or destroyed, only transformed

always treat every daughter as loaded, even if you know she isn't

you do not talk about my daughter

[no-one-offical]

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