Homestuck Reacts

Every wonder how a certain group of Homestuck characters would react to something? Well you have now.

[homestuckreacts]

John: Remake the World pt. 1

John held his side to slow the bleeding from the bullet wound that had just been inflicted upon him and glared at the one holding the gun. Standing before him were two figures, each equally powerful in their own way. 

The demon known only as Lord English, golden gun in hand and aimed directly at him, his ever changing eyes looking toward him and his mouth twisted into a sort of smile.

Beside him stood the Condesce, looking equally annoyed and amused. After the proud had freed those from her command she had decided to cut her loses and destroy them and make a new plan to kill her master at some other point. 

John looked around, scanning the broken battlefield to see if there was anyone left to back him up. That however, was impossible. His friends bodies laid on the battlefield, truly dead, having died heroically against the two creatures.

"Boy" the voice of Lord English rang out. "Did you and your friends really expect to defeat that which has already won?"

John looked at him, and then at the Condesce before taking a step back. "I did, but I guess now I don't" he closed his eyes.

"Oh now what, will you go back and try to warn your friends?" The Condesce laughed. "You must be real glubbin stupid, isn't it obvious that no matter what you do we will kill them again and again and again?"

John wanted to voice protest, he truly did. But the words wouldn't pass his lips. He knew she was right. They had fucked up, this wasn't something they could win at this point. Not without changing...everything. "Your right, from where we are there is no way to win" he looked up at them, a dark look passing over his face. "But history is mine to change, so I think it is about time I started getting to work" 

Lord English felt a massive amount of temporal disturbance ring across the world at those lines. He might not be smart, but he knew everything there was to know about time. And at this moment something was happening he couldn't describe. "Kill him!" Lord English opened fire, but in vain. 

John Egbert had disappeared in a flash of light.

_________________________________________________________________

John found himself on the trolls homeworld, looking over the planet form atop a mountain. "Okay Egbert, what are you going to do now?"

He sat down and thought about exactly what his plan was. In truth he didn't really know how to fix things, he was still ignorant on so many things. If Rose where here she could tell him what the change just by getting lucky. Jade was way smarter then him, and would probably already have ten plans. And Dave would probably just look at every timeline and find the best option. But all he had was wind, and that didn't do much.

Unless it did. John stood up and smiled. "I need to learn everything, that way I know what to fix..." he looked down at himself. "I just have to hope this works..." John let out a small breath and reached deep down into himself. When he finally found what he was looking for he opened his eyes. "Good bye" he said to himself, covering his body to wind and allowing himself to spread out across the world. And suddenly he was everywhere, everyone. He could observe and see everything all at once, as if he were watching a zillion t.v. monitors at once and understanding everything that was going on. He saw romances, tragedies. Life and death. Beginnings and ends. He kept this form going, spreading himself across the galaxy as trolls carried bits of him with them. Years, centuries, more. Time passed until it became meaningless to him. 

And eventually he reached a point where he had caught up with his current timeline, and with a mighty effort he pulled himself back together. He fell to the ground where he had been reformed and began to shake, feeling unsure of a form he hadn't taken in a very long time. His mind went from crazy to sane in the snaps between fingers. Everything he learned running through his mind so fast he thought it would explode. But after more time passed John felt everything settle and a smile came to his face. If someone saw it they might call the smile demented or even fear inducing. But no one else was around, he had picked his spot perfectly. He shakily pushed himself to his feet. 

"Right, save the entire reality time" he closed his eyes and took a breath, teleporting himself to the first place he needed to be. 

[homestuckreacts]

John: Awaken

John woke up with a start, his covers pooled around his lap as he fought to catch his breath. He looked around the room, vision blurry due to his lack of glasses. He quickly grabbed them from his nightstand and put them on, looking at his empty room with a frown of confusion. 

The last thing he remembered was the other kids and him fighting against The Condesce. It had been a tough fight, but it looked like they had been about to win... and now he was in bed. John caught the wiff of baked goods in the air, which was strange, Nannasprite's baking didn't smell like that, the only one who could fill the air with that smell had been...

John jumped up from the bed and exited his room, running through the halls and taking the stairs two at a time, almost falling facefirst in his rush. He really did need to heed those warnings one of these days. He entered into the kitchen and saw... his dad. He was in front of the oven, watching a cake cook while mixing up the batter for another one. "Hello there son, happy birthday" Dad smiled warmly at his son. "Thirteen already, time flies" 

John stood in place, unable to get his body to obey his commands. He felt tears come to his eyes. "Just a dream..." he whispered to himself. 

Dad Egbert looked at his son, confusion written plain on his face. "What was that?"

John pushed up his glasses and rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. "Nothing dad, I just had this really weird dream, maybe I ate something funny last night"

His father thought about it for a moment before nodding. "Maybe, I will cut back on making us sweets before bed, see if that helps" he put down the mix. "So son, it is your birthday, what do you want to do?"

"Well... um..." John looked down and bit his lip. "Do you think we could just spend the day together, cooking, and clowning around, watching some movies and stuff like that?"

He smiled warmly and nodded. "I couldn't think of a better way to spend the day, through you might want to change out of your sleep clothes"

John looked down at himself and laughed. He was still wearing his pjs. "Good point, give me like ten minutes, I am sure everyone wants to get their well wishes done with." he turned around and started to exist the door.

"Son, one second" Mr. Egbert called out.

John stopped at the door and turned around. "Yes dad?"

"I am really proud of you" he stated with a smile.

John shook his head. "Thanks" he made his way up the stairs and into his room, quickly throwing on some clothing for himself to wear. He got in the chair and turned on his monitor, examining pesterchum and awaiting all of the well wishes he was sure....to...get... wait what was going on here?

His pesterchum contact list was empty. John sighed and glared at his screen with annoyance. There must have been an update that deleted his contacts by accident. He quickly typed in turntechGodhead into the user search so he could refind Dave. But after a few moments the search came up...empty. There was no user by that name. 

"What the hell?" John bit his lip again. Maybe Dave had changed his screen name to escape a troll? John typed in tentacleTherapist and found to his annoyance that there was still no users. Okay this was starting to get on his nerves. He typed gardenGnostic into the search. Maybe Jade knew...

No search results for that user.

John hit his keyboard with his fist. What was even going on here? If this was some kind of birthday prank he did not find it very funny. 

John took a moments to really think about it through. Maybe they had just been a part of his dream last night. Maybe he had just imagined Dave and Rose and Jade. It had been a pretty vivid dream, him making up people in the dream probably wouldn't be that odd. A sudden beep tore his away from his thoughts, and when he looked at the screen he noticed he had a chat request. He quickly opened it and found that there was no user name, but rather a phrase written over and over again. Wake Up.

John rolled his eyes and closed the window, but when he did he saw his monitor was filled with the same message. Wake up. John almost cursed, thinking his computer had been hit with some new virus. Except when he looked away from his computer he saw it everywhere. Written on the bed, on the walls, on the floor. Everywhere he looked all he saw was Wake Up. John closed his eyes tight. "Go away, go away, go away" he whispered to himself, almost pleading. When he opened his eyes the room was normal, as was his computer. "Man I really did eat something weird last night" John got up and went back to the kitchen. "I'm back"

His dad nodded and the two of them began to work. But something seemed off to John. He couldn't pin it down, but a feeling of unease that he just couldn't shake hung over him like a cloud. "Pass the whisk dad?" John held out his hand for the utensil but nothing was placed there. "Dad..." John looked up and found that to his confusion his dad was frozen in place, unmoving. Actually everything seemed frozen, as if time had simply stopped.

"So then, is this it?" John followed the voice to the doorway of the kitchen and found something that confused him greatly. 

Standing at the door was his dad, dressed in the same hat and smoking the same pipe as the dad next to him. "W...who are you?" John asked, taking a step back.

The other Dad walked over to the kitchen table and sat down. "You know who I am John, and you know where you are, don't you?"

John was about to open his mouth to speak, but found he couldn't. No words would exit his mouth, no matter how hard he tried. And then, realization flooded back into him. 

They had been fighting The Condesce and had been about to win, but then she had raised her hand and there had been a flash of green light. And then he woke up here. "Is this?"

His dad nodded. "Just a dream I am afraid" 

John walked over to the table and sat down, looking at his dad. "So who are you?"

"I am your father John, who else?" his dad took the pipe from his mouth and set it down.

"But you aren't real" John said, his voice heavy with sorrow. 

His dad thought on that for a moment. "In a way I guess I am not, but in other ways I am, sometimes it is better not to question it"

John nodded and looked down. "So what now?" he asked, his voice sounding weaker then before.

"That is up to you John, it is your dream, what do you want to do?" His father looked at him curiously.

"I..." John paused, really thinking about the question. "Would it be wrong of me to want to stay here, to just forget about everything and pretend I had this life for awhile?"

His father shook his head. "No it wouldn't be wrong, I couldn't blame you for not wanting to leave, for just wanting to stay here" his father looked at him. "But I couldn't be proud of you if you choose that"

Those words hit John like a bucket of bricks. "That... that is unfair!" John slammed his palms on the table and stood up, tears in his eyes as he glared at his dad. "Do you have any idea of all the shit I have been through, of everything I have done and fought and... and...and..." John's voice caught in his throat and his vision blurred with tears. 

His father slowly stood up, wrapping his arms around his sound comfortingly. "The measure of a man isn't the hardships he has been through, but rather how he deals with those hardships" His father moved back a step. "No matter what you do, I will be proud of you, but if you do nothing, then I can't be. If you choose nothing, then I will be unable to find pride in the things you do, because you won't be doing them."

John absorbed his fathers words and hugged him. "I miss you" he whispered under his breath.

John's dad wrapped his arms around his son and held him in a fatherly embrace. "I miss you too son"

A sudden gust of wind blew into the room and surrounded John, covering him in a layer of wind. When it disappeared he stood taller, his godtier clothing covering him.

"So did you decide?" his father asked.

John nodded. "Yeah, I have people who are depending on me... and a father I need to make proud" he let out a breath.

"I am always proud of you son" his father rested an arm on his shoulder. "You have become a fine man, I am truly proud of you" 

John smiled and his hand on top of his dads. "Will you come with me?" 

His father smiled and began to fade away. "I am always with you son" his father disappeared, leaving John standing alone in a room of pure white.

"My friends need me" a portal opened in front of him, glowing with a sort of purple energy. "Lets go dad!" he jumped in, ready for whatever waited on the other side.

[homestuckreacts]

So bad news.

There probably won't be a lot of activity from me for awhile. My computers hard drive called it quits and I am currently in the process of trying to build up enough money to get a new one. Hopefully that pans out and I can be back working on this blog soon. Odds are I might be out for a few weeks, a month at most. I will try to get some stuff done on paper so when I get back you guys can have a load of cool updates. Hope to see you all soon.

-Lord High Editor. 

[homestuckreacts]

Death of Gamzee

Gamzee pressed himself against the wall, slowly sliding down it, his purple blood leaving a smear against it. He raised his head and looked out toward the trolls in front of him, the ones who had done this much damage to him. “Looks like you motherfuckers win” he coughed weakly and press his hand against a wound in his stomach. “So…does can a highblood get one last request or do I just bleed to death now?”

The group looked at each other nervously before Karkat stepped up. “What do you want you raging psychopath?” he gripped his purple stained sickles, ready to attack again.

"Just one last conversation with my best bro" Gamzee looked at the other trolls behind Karkat. "Just you and me bestest friend" he looked down at himself. "I mean come on, not like I can do much looking like I do now"

Karkat thought about the request for a moment and then nodded. “Go” he said to the others. “Who knows what the humans are fucking up right now” 

Kanaya and Terezi looked at each other and then at him, their expressions both filled with worry. 

"I said get the fuck out of here!" Karkat barked. They both nodded and turned, making their way back to the rest of the group. Karkat moved forward and knelt next to Gamzee. "So what the fuck do you want to say?"

Gamzee looked at his formal morial and smiled a bit. “Sorry” he said weakily.

"Sorry?" Karkat looked at him and grit his teeth. "Is that all you had to say?"

He shook his head. “No, just what I wanted to start with…” he coughed, spitting out a gob of purple tinted blood to the side.  ”I want to tell you some shit, that no one else can know, so promise to keep it a fucking secret okay?”

Karkat looked at the clown and stayed silent for a few moments before nodding. “Fine”

Gamzee grinned. “Knew I could count on you” he raised his arm and playfully touched his fist to Karkat’s shoulder. “You were always one of my motherfucking best friends, ever since we met, all that time ago…” he thought back to when they met, but banished the thought. He didn’t have time to think back on shit right now. “I guess the best way to start this would be… I have known about your motherfucking blood for basically ever bro”

Karkat looked down at him, his eyes filled with confusion. “You…”

"Shut up and let me talk!" Gamzee barked out. "I don’t exactly have motherucking time, and I have shit to go through" 

Karkat nodded, deciding to stay silent and listen to the dying troll.

"Good, now I never really gave a fuck about blood color, didn’t really seem important, not while I was on the slime anyway. But I knew other motherfuckers cared about it, and that it would screw you up for the rest of your life" he shook his head. "I wasn’t about to let my best fucking friend be screwed for his entire life" he took a few short breaths, trying to not pass out from blood loss. 

"Of course I had no idea how to do that, until the game came up, then an idea really came to my thinkpan, you could be leader of one of the teams and beat the other one" he laughed shakily. "I dropped hints to every motherfucker that you should be leader, they were small but I made sure everyone would be able to think of you as a leader" he waved his hand. "Guess I did a good job, seeing as when the teams came together everyone was good with you leading" 

"But that wasn’t it, even if they accepted you as a leader without blood color there needed to be no motherfucking doubt the caste system was stupid for the next generation, that just because your blood was higher didn’t mean you were better. I needed to be the worst thing that ever happened, I needed to make monsters of the highbloods, so the next trolls wouldn’t think about letting us be high up." 

Flashback

Vriska walked down the hallways of the meteor bored out of her thinkpan. She wanted to be fighting right now, not sitting around watching the humans have all the fun.

"Sup my mothefucking blue blooded sister?" Gamzee smiled, leaning on the wall.

"Go eat a pie" Vriska said, walking past him.

"You seem on edge, something wrong?" he asked curiously. 

"For your information yes, I am bored out of my fucking mind watching these humans fuck around and not doing anything, we should hunting Noir" Vriska unloaded on the clown.

"Maybe you should hunt Noir" Gamzee said casually.

Vriska stopped for a moment and turned around. “What do you mean?”

Gamzee shrugged. “You are a motherfucking god tier and the strongest member of the team, I bet you could beat that motherfucker with both eyes closed”

Vriska looked at him for a moment with a frown. “You think so?”

Gamzee smiled. “I don’t think it would be too much of a miracle sis”

_________________________________________________________

Eridan waved his wand, sending out a blast of pure white energy and destroying another target. “The power of science proves itself once more!”

A round of clapping rang out from the back as Gamzee walked into the room. “That was pretty motherfucking sweet”

Eridan raised an eyebrow. “The fuck are you doing here clown?”

He shrugged. “Can’t a motherfucker step in and see what someone is doing” he tilted his head. “Speaking of which what are you doing?”

Eridan grinned and tapped his wand on a desk. “The fuck does it look like, I am mastering the art of the white science so when we fight Noir I can slaughter him”

Gamzee nodded. “You think you can beat Noir?”

The fish-like troll grinned. “Of course I can, with this power I can do anyfin”

"Even through he is stronger then our final boss by like a thousand times" Gamzee put on an impressed look. "You are really that strong?"

Eridan bit his lip. “Of course not… but with everyone else…”

Gamzee frowned. “You really trust everyone to back you up, you must have a lot of faith in them”

Eridan paused his tapping of the wand. “Now that you mention it…”

Gamzee shrugged and turned around. “You know if I were you, I would probably jump ship while I could, that might just be me through” Gamzee walked out, leaving Eridan alone with his thoughts.

flashback end

Gamzee smiled at the memories. “After that is was a matter of waiting, didn’t know exactly how the shit would fall, but in the end we three proved that highbloods are all vicious fuckers who shouldn’t be leading dick” he frowned. “Through you were suppose to kill me, not motherfucking calm me down, but I guess that it wouldn’t be the same” he looked up. “After that I thought stuff would be fine, but then the humans showed up… and I saw how that glasses wearing fuck started screwing with your feelings for Terezi, fucking up your relationship, so I blackromed Terezi to knock him out of the red” he laughed. “Humans… fucking weird, but with me dead and Dave not interested in relationships with trolls she is all yours for whatever quadrant you want”

Karkat gripped tight his sickle. “Even if what you are saying is true there were better fucking ways to do it”

Gamzee looked up to his friend his eyes glassy. “Maybe, probably, who motherfucking knows” Gamzee let out a small breath. “One last motherfucking thing” he reached up both arms and closed his eyes, summoning two objects from his fetch modus. One was a briefcase full of jars filled with colorful liquids. In the other hand was a small spiky orb. “In the Condense’s palace on Derse there is a machine that can be used to regenerate dead trolls using genetic material, these jars are filled with everyone’s blood and a special juju that will transfer their personalities in it… working for a demon has advantages” he coughed. “And this is a matriorb I alchemized after years of guesswork on the code, pretty obvious what to do with it”

Karkat looked at the two object and at his friend with shock. “Gamzee…”

He smiled. “Don’t tell anyone, just go and do your thing bro, people respect you now, no one will care about your blood color, especially after you bring them to life again. You will help beat a god, there is nothing else I can do…” he slowly reached up his hand. “I am pretty sleepy bro… think I am going to take a nap”

Karkat nodded, taking the case and the matriorb and putting them in his fetch modus. “You do that man…”

Gamzee gave a slight nod. “Bestest motherfucking bros?” he asked weakily.

Karkat grasped Gamzee’s hands in his own. “Yeah, best bros”

Gamzee smiled and after a few moments finally passed on.

[homestuckreacts]

Anon Asks: Can I make reacts?

So a few people have sent asks wondering if they could submit fan reacts. And I would like to say.

Yes

I want this

It would be awesome.

Simply use the format of other reacts and make your own. Submit it to me and I will post it so it can be seen by everyone. 

That is all for today, please look forward to two new reacts coming either tomorrow or the day after that. One another ship (a rather strange, yet fun one) and a react that might be a bit... triggering. Nothing NSFW but still, lets just say it might be interesting. Till next time friends

-Lord High Editor

[homestuckreacts]

Anon asks: Trolls react Karkalicious

Karkat reaction: Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. Fuck me, fuck me this wasn't suppose to get out. Has everyone seen it already? Fuck. Oh fuck I need to get out of here, I need to fine the most isolated corner of hell and hide there before any of them find me. Don't come looking for me and for the love of god don't point them in my direction.

Sollux reaction: At this point I am pretty sure Karkat has fled reality, so yeah I am the one who lifted it from his computer and emailed it to everyone. Because fuck can you honestly blame? That shit was the funniest thing I have heard in my life.

Tavros reaction: Um... I don't want to offend him or anything but... god that was the single funniest thing I have ever heard before in my life. Maybe a more confident person would hold back the laugh and tell his friend everything would be fine... but even I kind of plan to make fun of him for this. I mean... Karkalicious.

Equius reaction: I find a number of things in this song quite disturbing. First being that he believes that I would feel any quadrant towards him, or that I could have a feelings so intense they would exceed the concepts of quadrants. The second being that he is playing on my morials unfortunate crush on him. Now I have to go make him unable to function in pailing actives. Excuse me if you will.

Vriska reaction: Oh gog this is so horribly pathetic I can't stop laughing. Karkat, the troll who couldn't hold a redrom to save his life is saying that every troll secretly thinks of him. Oh my sides they hurt oh shit I just can't. Fuck seriously that is just too great. And also stay away from Egbert, even in your deluded fantasyscape I have dibs.

Terezi reaction: First off no, I am never going to stop reminding him of this song until the day he dies. Second of all even through we have gone past any chance of redrom it offends me that I am second in line during this hypothetical pail party. Not that someone as honorable as me would be caught dead there. Honestly it seems like wasting genetic material during something like that is rather illegal, and you know crime pays.

Aradia reaction: I have to say, in my travels I have found things buried deep in Alternia that were never meant to be found. I am pretty sure that is what this song was suppose to be. Thank gog it was found through because this is the single funniest thing I will ever hear.

Gamzee reaction: Motherfucker certainly has a high opinion of himself doesn't he? Does he honestly think I am going to drop my pants and fill a pail with him just because he is pretty awesome? Well motherfucking newsflash, I probably will, time and place bro, lets make a miracle.

Eridan reaction: And people call me pathetic? Jeesh at least I didn't have my head crammed so far up my own wastehole that I believed that I could land any member of our species without the effort of even trying. News flash Kar you aren't that great. Even I could only woo... maybe half our species before the game. saying you could do more is simply a lie.

Feferi reaction: Oh my glub... this is just... I just can't stop listening because this is the single most amazing thing I have ever heard. It might be a bit crude but oh I just can't. Oh this is just the single greatest thing I ever have the pleasure of listening to. Can you die from laughter?

Nepeta reaction: D...did Karkitty just say he would fill a pail with me? Wait he also mentioned a line... if I point Gamzee at them I wonder how many he could take out... or I could use him as a distraction and get their first... no one but me is doing anything like that with my Karkitty if he says I can. 

Dave reaction: Dude hate to break it to you but that isn't ironic. That is just kind of sad. And by kind of, I mean really sad.

[homestuckreacts]

Anon asks: John <3 Roxy?

Humans react to: John x Roxy

  John reaction: Well what can I say? Roxy likes a whole lot of the same things I do! She thinks the magic tricks I do are interesting and she even watches movies with me and enjoys them! She has a bit of a problem with drinking I guess, but no one is perfect, and I help her whenever I can. She is really cool and I guess above everything else she just makes me really happy.

Rose reaction: John is dating my mother. I mean I guess she is not my mother. But she is. I am not really quite sure how to handle this. I think a healthy dose of alcohol is need. And by healthy I very much do mean I am very glad I am godtier and my liver can regenerate damage done to it by fatal doses of liquor.

Dave reaction: Well I am happy for them. I mean it is my best bro and my... technical... mother. Wait if they got married would that make John like my dad...? Hey Rose stop drinking all the alcohol some of the rest of us need this burned from our minds too! Um... anyway I am happy that the two of them are happy. Now excuse me while I drink away the thought of having John as a dad.

Jade reaction: Aww they are so cute together. Being all super dorky with their magic tricks and such. I just wish they would keep less cats around so I could hang out with them more often!

Jake reaction: Why I think they are both great for each other. And they pull off a rather crackerjack magic show when we get together. Through I do wish they might tone down their constant need to be adorable together. A rugged adventurer like myself should not be caught squeeing because two people are ridiculously adorable together. Which is a thing I will deny doing unless you have video evidence, and if you do please remember I carry around pistols *finger guns*

Jane reaction: Personally I am glad Roxy found herself such a nice man. With how happy they make each other one forgets that Roxy is dating a younger version of my poppop... which would make her my grand....mother... excuse me! Dave, Rose, is there still copious amounts of drinks to help me forget certain facts? Great!

Dirk reaction They are good for each other. Roxy makes John act more adult with keeping her off drinking, and John keeps her off drinking. Honestly the only way it could be better is if they both shared a number of interests. Oh wait they do. Well look at that.

Roxy reaction: Hm me and John? Well what do you want me to say about it, I really like him. He is basically everything I could ask for in a guy. He loves magic, he is dorky in an adorable and endearing way, he makes me smile even when I feel like frowning... and he helps me realize that I don't need to drink all the time to be happy. I couldn't ask for anything better, and I think I am a very lucky girl to have him.

((I apologize for my lack of updates lately, I am currently doing a few reacts and am done with the Beta vs. Noir and halfway finished with Trolls vs. Gamzee. I am always looking for new reacts, so remember to send me an ask. Might do a few more updates today and tomorrow, so if you have something you want to see send it in! Remember I don't just do ships, I have them react to just about anything. Actually the next one I will do... well lets just say it is... karkalicious))

[homestuckreacts]

Blog Update

Quick shout out to my 32 followrs, you guys rock adn thanks for following this little blog of mine. Anyway you won't see many normal reaction updates for a few days because I am working on three big reacts much in the form of Dad reacts to Jane's mind control.

Beta Godtier react to Bec Noir.

Trolls react Evil Gamzee

Alpha Godtier react to The Condesce

These three projects will be released at the same time, thus by you might see two to three day stretches with no reaction updates. This does not mean I don't want to see lots of react suggestions hitting my mail, because even when I don't get to stuff right away I save the ideas to work on later. Also from now on in order to allow people to reblog my stuff (apparently something people like to do) I will simply add anon asks to the title of the post. If you however want me to ask a question and you are not anon I will still post it as an answer to an ask. 

Once again thank you for your followers and your likes and your reblogs. You guys are great and I hope to provide lots of cool content in the future.

[homestuckreacts]

Homestuck react: Grimdorks

Karkat reaction: Now I like to think of myself as a rather down to Alternia person. The kind of guy that doesn't shove crap in peoples faces. But HA I fucking called it. Oh what is that? I am weird huh? Well now who is in a committed long term relationship with someone who makes them happy and who is right? ...Oh just fuck off.

Kanaya reaction: While I might not exactly enjoy the fact that Rose is now dating another person I am a big enough person to say I am glad they are happy together. I am not however big enough to not mention that she traded someone with a fashion sense like mind for someone who ears a bright blue hoodie pretty much every day of his life. When it is sunny one should be wearing something other then a piece of clothing meant for cold days. 

John reaction: Well I really like Rose. She can be down to Earth and really smart. But at the same time she can be really funny and can trade a back and forth with the best of them (a.k.a. me). I mean there are things we have disagreements about. On movie nights weapons might get drawn on whether we watch Con Air or Harry Potter, but nothing that ever gets too bad. She makes me happy, and that is more then I could ever ask for.

Dave reaction: Oh Egbert and my sister? Fuck yeah I support it . First off he is human, and as cool as dating aliens can be I really don't want my sister giving birth to some weird half human half troll... thing... I mean don't get me wrong she is free to date whoever she wants, but if I really had to pick someone it would be John. I mean the odds of him making the first move on anything are about the same odds that I one day will grow up to not be awesome. And those odds aren't ones I would bet on.

Rose reaction: Oh yes John and I. Well I suppose it was inevitable. When your creator likes your pairing enough to make a chart over it-

Karkat- Fuck off

Rose: -seems like it is inevitable. As for John well... he makes me smile. After all of the darkness and over all fuckery we have been through he still finds a way to make me laugh. Honestly after three years on that floating rock I only really laughed or thought I was happy when I was downing moonshine. But now he can get an honest laugh out of me, one that doesn't make me hate myself when I take it. What can I say, got to love a man who can make you laugh.

Jade reaction: Oooooh my gosh I am so happy about them being together. Rose keeps John from going to crazy with his pranks and Rose seems a lot happier around John.I think they are just perfect together. Always knew the two of them would fall in love. And... I guess that makes Karkat right about something... which is not something I am used to saying. It sounds weird... and a bit wrong.

Dad Egbert: So it seems my son has found himself a girlfriend. I know that like a true man he will treat her right and eventually bless me with many grandchildren.

John: Dad... 

Rose: Honestly John calm down.

Mom Lalonde: Well I suppose if they are going to have children they should have a wedding. 

Rose: Oh god why.

John: See not so nice now is it?

Dad Egbert: Excellent point, I will start working on the cake toot sweet.

Mom Lalonde: And I know the perfect drink to go with a wedding.

John: Want to get out of here?

Rose: Yes, for the love of all that is good yes

John and Rose have absconded

[homestuckreacts]

Anons ask: Homestuck reacts to: Dave <3 Karkat

Karkat reaction: Okay first off fuck anyone and everyone who tries and points out I suggested we not date humans. If no one else is going to listen to me then why should I give a fuck what I say? Anyway I like being around Dave, no matter how pissed off I get he just keeps this calm voice and talks me out of it. It ain't perfect, but hey, I don't mind it.

Terezi reaction: Wait my previous two redrom interests ended up together? I am... confused... and a little turned on for some reason.

John reaction: Wait wait wait wait. Karkat... and Dave... dating? Like going to movies and having sick rap battles and stuff? What exactly do those two do for dates? Watch ironic romcoms? Angry raping? I have so many questions.

Rose reaction: I must say I am the Seer of Light and even I did not see this one coming. I suppose dating trolls must just run in the family blood. Through I am still unable to wrap my head around the concept of my brother making out with Karkat... pardon me I do believe I now need to break my sobriety or kill myself. Whichever will remove that image faster.

Dave reaction: Yeah I kind of figured people would ask a few questions about this one. To be honest with you guys if you told me a few years ago I would be dating Karkat I would have sent you back to be eaten by dinosaurs. But three years of getting to know a guy... well you just learn shit about each other, you get close to them. So yeah I am dating Karkat. We make each other happy, so anyone who doesn't like it, well the dinosaurs are always hungry.

Jade reaction: I really like the two of them together. Dave breaks his cool kid thing around people and shows a bit more emotion, and Karkat shows... a lot less emotion. Which is a good thing, because most of his emotion was rage. They really balance each other out, and I am happy for them.

Bro Strider reaction: Wait wait wait wait what? My little brother managed to hook himself some piece of hot alien ass?

Dave: Please don't do this.

Bro Strider: Well listen if the two of you start doing any behind closed door stuff...

Dave: I will pay you so much money just to stop.

Bro Strider: Then either make sure you top or wear protection, I am not raising some weird alien creature that explodes out of your chest after two hours.

Dave: Okay I am going to go find a place to kill myself now. Reactions over. 

[homestuckreacts]

Anon asks: KarkatxTerezi <3

Trolls react to: KarkatxTerezi <3

Karkat reaction: Listen I know I am going to get so much shit from the other assholes who I call my friends but... she makes me feel whole. And less angry. Like not every little thing needs to piss me off. Fuck I even caught myself laughing in a way that wasn't filled with disgust for the person making the joke. 

Sollux reaction: I mean don't get me wrong I am happy for him and everything, after all he is one of the people that annoys me least. But it is creepy seeing him all happy and stuff. Like if you asked me what was more likely, Karkat smiling or me giving up hacking I would have said the latter had a better chance of happening. Shows what I know.

Tavros reaction: I am really glad hey are together. Karkat calmed down a whole bunch and Terezi seems less... um... crazy? I guess. I mean that isn't the exact word I would use. I mean maybe it is what a confident person would say, but um... I am not that confident.

Equius reaction: While I might find the idea of one with such noble blood dating one who has... not so noble blood, I have found that I need to simply focus on the happiness of the party I like, and she seems... happy. 

Vriska reaction: So my scourge sis has a little matesprite does she? Well I am glad they are happy, and they can continue to be up until their luck runs out. Good thing for them I would never be so petty as to steal their luck from them. Would I?

Terezi reaction: Oh me and Karkles hm? Well after we got past all of the games and stuff it was really nice. He always does all of these things he watched off of a romcom and I will tell him how silly it is and then do stuff to make him blush that candy red color. He makes me happy above all else. Like... like I don't have to be miserable about everything all the time. And seeing his rare smiles... well lets just say there are only a few things that make eyes worth having. And that is one of them.

Aradia reaction: I am glad that they make each other happy. I am also glad that they both manage to cool each others... quirks down a bit. I don't really mind people being anger, but when you are as powerful as me being around that much aggression and hatred really does a number on the thinkpan.

Gamzee reaction: Aww how cue, my morial and my motherfucking black interest all hanging out together in the red quadrant. I am pretty fucking chill with it, just means when the club falls I only need to swing motherfucking once.

Eridan reaction: I honestly don't see what the big deal is. Two of the most unpleasant assholes I know got hooked up and now they are slightly less annoying to be around. End of story.

Feferi reaction: Aww they are glubbing adorable. They hold hands when they walk around and Terezi tries to embarrass Karkat and he does all this glubbin romantic stuff. It is just amazing to watch!

Nepeta reaction: Well I guess I am a little sad that Karkitty picked someone else I am happy for them. There are plenty of other ships to go after, so what is the point of getting hung up on one of them? Better to purrsue a new OTP don't cha think?

[homestuckreacts]

Trolls react: JohnxVriksa <3

Karkat reaction: How in the fuck did you do it Egbert? How in the fuck did you not only manage to survive courting but actually enter into a full blown redrom with the high queen of bitch herself? Are you the bitch whisperer? If you are teach me man. If what you are doing can work for her it must work on Terezi, and anything you can do I can do better.

Sollux reaction: Wait...  you mean that is actually a thing? I thought it was some sort of myth, like the one horned hoofbeast. Someone who could actually get Vriska to not be a bitch for five seconds. Oh Gog everything I have ever believed has been turned on its head. I need something more sane then this.Back to trollblr.

Tavros reaction: Bah to both of them. I hope Vriska ends up crippling him and insulting him for needing to use a wheelchair. Except she won't because he is godtier and can fly and do windy stuff. Eh screw this reaction I am out.

Equius reaction: Well I may not like the idea of us trolls involving ourselves in human affairs I have to say I don't mind this. If it keeps her out of my life and gets her to stop trying to have worrisome RP's with my morial she could date a tree stump for all I care. Pardon my harsh words.

Vriska reaction: First off I am pretty sure the others are reacting with some form of surprise so I am just going to say fuck all of them just to cover my bases. As for John... well he is geeky, a bit annoying, way to into magic or jokes or whatever. But he makes me happy, makes me feel... accepted. Like yeah I did this shit before, but I don't have to be constantly judged by that. He makes me want to be a better person for him. And if you fucking tell anyone I said that I will deny it and then have you hit by a truck.

Terezi reaction: Oh this is great! Now Vriska has one more weakness for me to exploit when the time comes for us to finally clash. If you capture the criminals lover they will of course try to save them. And then justice can be served to both. 

Aradia reaction: Well if you had asked me before I would have told you that Vriska didn't deserve anything other then a quick kick to the face and a bunch of bones broken through telekinesis. But now that I am godtier all that stuffs seems very unimportant. So I both wish them happiness and wish them death, but at least a swift one. Two corpse parties for the price on one!

Gamzee reaction: Aww those motherfuckers look real cute together. Maybe when my master orders me to subjugulate all of these motherfuckers I will put them in the same cage. After I break every bone in their motherfucking bodies first of course. Can't be too safe.

Eridan reaction: I can not believe that she would deny my perfectly valid and awesome offer for a blackrom and pick up... some human for a red fling. Honestly that girls thinkpan must be fucked up beyond all reason. Oh well, her lose. I am not about to share some dumb spider bitch with a human of all things.

Feferi reaction: They are glubbing sweet. John somehow made Vriska act all nice and stuff. It is like... a miracle. I wonder if his pale quadrant is taken up... maybe he could finally do something about Eridan...

Nepeta reaction: Awww they are adorable together. I totally ship it! Also Vriska roleplays a lot nicer now, maybe this is a good thing. But to be purrfectly honest I am just glad they are happy.

  _________________________________________________________

High Lord Editor: Just to let you guys know any ship reacts will be treated as cannon. So just because I have done JohnxNepeta doesn't mean you can't send a react like JohnxGamzee. Anything they react to is cannon in that react.

[homestuckreacts]

Trolls react to homesmut? (Ohmygosh this is gonna be so funny)

Karkat reaction: I…I don’t have curse words strong enough. I have seen some shit in my lifetime, but never in all my sweeps did I ever think I would experience… whatever the fuck that was. You people… you people are sick. You had me doing things with Equius… you fuckers realize if he looks at someone hard enough they might die right? Just…fuck.

Sollux reaction: Okay who the fuck decided to make a post of me and the fish boy? And who decided who got to be where in this? I swear on everything I will find those who did this and end them. And if this ends up on troll 4chan I will burn the internet. I will write a code and BURN THE INTERNET!

Tavros reaction: Oh um… wow you guys certainly have um… wow. I mean I am sure a really confident person could look at all these pictures and feel flattered by them, but I can’t help but feel that maybe this is a little disturbing. I mean… I am not even sure how half of these things would work.

Equius reaction: Currently passed out in a pool of sweat and thus by unavailable for comment. Also he seems to be muttering something about highbloods under his breath. Weird.

Kanaya reaction: Oh my this certainly is… um… interesting? I mean if I had to be drawn by humans I suppose it is better that I stay without clothes, at least that way they won’t put me in something ugly. I mean lets be fair, you humans have less fashion taste then most trolls.

Vriska reaction: I am going to kill all of you. All of you. Not one of you will be left alive because I am going on the fucking warpath. I will track down every last shit who has drawn me like… THIS… and I will make your deaths as painfully slow as possible. That is a promise.

Terezi reaction: Oh wow. I mean… I feel like this should be breaking some form of law, I just… don’t know which one. I might need to make up new laws just to properly punish those who have made these things. Especially any of them that imply red actions with the insane purple blood bastard. I will make these new laws, find you, and enforce them.

Aradia reaction:  There is a surprising number of pictures of me as a robot. And here I thought Equius was the only one into that sort of thing. Oh and regarding those making these images of me with my fellow trolls in such a manner. Hope your families are ready to throw a corpse party for you. Because there will be one soon.

Gamzee reaction: This motherfucking shit is funny as all forms of hell. Just because you made me motherfucking laugh I will make your deaths quick, maybe make a few paintings of my own after I am done squeezing you motherfuckers dry.

Eridan reaction: Yes it is horrible and disgusiting. I have no idea why you humans would make such an awful… homesmut with your name in the tag updated with 8 new images… If you will excuse me there are things that I have to do more important then these silly reactions. Also come into my room and I will science you in the stomach.

Feferi reaction: Oh my everyloving glub this is… I mean… how do you even react to seeing yourself… and your friends… and the… positions… oh glub I want to have my memory erased, is there a way to erase my memory?

Nepeta reaction: It is like the final result of all my shipping dreams come true! I can’t believe how great the art is on some of these, and how much work and love goes into them. You are all great! But those who made the pictures of me and my morial together in such a way… while lets just say I have new prey to hunt after tonight.

Bonus reaction

Hussie reaction: You people do realize that when you first met this characters they are like 13 right? What the fuck is wrong with all of you. You know what I am going back into my magical closet and ignoring this bullshit. Hussie out.

[homestuckreacts]

Trolls being asked on a date

Karkat reaction: Why in the bonebulge sucking hell would you possibly want to go on a date with me? Don’t you know everything I touch turns to shit and that I am just as likely to get pissed at everything that happens then have a good time? What in the fuck is wrong with you? If they manage to listen to that and still want to go. Fine… but I am paying for dinner.

Sollux reaction: Mind if we just spend the day cuddling and watching internet videos or coding? Because I do want to spend time with you, but I also don’t want to miss anything cool happening while we do.

Tavros reaction: A um… date? You want to go on a date with me? While I guess a person with real confidence would jump at the chance to go out with someone as awesome as you. I just don’t know if I am.. um.. special enough to do something like that with someone like you. Someone who is really great I mean… oh man I am rambling and making an ass out of myself…

Equius reaction: You wish to go on a date with me? It could be quite risky you know, I would hate to accidentally hurt you… but if you are sure then I suppose spending time with you in a public setting wouldn’t be a bad experience. It might even be quite pleasant.

Kanaya reaction: Oh dear a date? I will need to make an outfit… maybe more then one depending on what actives we will be doing. Oh and lipstick, and makeup, need to find fresh supplies for those. Oh dear so much to do in such a short time!

Vriska reaction: Well of course you want to ask me on a date, I am a pretty big deal of course, but I guess I could find room for you in my busy schedule. Maybe we could go on an adventure, find some lost ruins or fight against an army of two. …Or you know… dinner and a movie would be nice as well. But totally disappointing if you did it and I would whine and moan about it.

Terezi reaction: You want to go on a date with me hm? Well then put on your running shoes and your best black outfit, tonight we hunt criminals, and afterward you can treat me to ice cream. If you survive. 

Aradia reaction: A date? Well there are some ruins that I haven’t explored… you know special occasion and needing another person in case something happens. I guess I wouldn’t mind having you along to explore them with me.

Gamzee reaction: Does it really look like I have motherfucking time for that bullcrap? Yes it does, and I will pick you up around first moon rise. And you best be dressed for a motherfucking carnival, because that is where we will go!

Eridan reaction: Hm, I really should say no, I mean I am a member of royalty and don’t have time for such affairs like dates. But at the same time one must find balance for such things in life and I will pick you up around midnight and maybe we could go for some ice cream or a movie my treat and just have fun okay can’t wait bye!

Feferi reaction: Oh my glub a date? I would love to go on a date. We could swim around in the ocean and I can show you some of the neatest coral reefs you will ever see and it will be a lot of fun.

Nepeta reaction: Oh you want to go on a date with me? Well I don’t really have a lot of experience with that sort of thing… but I need to go hunting soon, and I wouldn’t mind you coming along… it could be kind of fun after all. 

[homestuckreacts]

What do the trolls think of Don't Hug Me I'm Scared?

Trolls React: Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared

Karkat reaction: You humans always find some new way to make me hate you as a collective race you know that? Why in the bonebulge sucking hell would you make something like this? What the fuck even is it? I have no fucking clue what I just watched!? And now every time I close my eyes all I see is fucking subjugator notebooks telling me to not be creative. THE FUCKI!

Sollux reaction: How many times do I need to tell you people that nothing that you make can ever scare me. Troll 4chan. Do you know what you see by just going there. The opening page one day had a hoofbeast… Rest of this reaction removed. What the fuck troll 4chan. What the fuck.

Tavros reaction: Well normally I would be afraid, but due to my massive amounts of confidence I always have I am never afraid. Just… don’t turn the light off okay? Not because I am afraid I just… like having lights on.

Equius reaction: I see nothing wrong with this short animation. It was simply one of the higher class keeping those beneath him in ignorance, as is his obvious right as the most respected person among the group. Looking at it this way it really isn’t so… ugh!

Kanaya reaction: I am still not sure what I just saw, but I am very comfortable from my position of holding onto Rose and not letting go. Honestly I am not sure what frightened me more, the mind bending quality of the last minute or the outfit that the yellow creature wears during it. I shudder to think of it.

Vriska reaction: Ha and people thought this would scare me. Please, it takes a lot more then that to scare me. I mean people acted like I was going to read this and then run off to find John and insist on hanging out with him and constantly glance at notebooks. Which isn’t a thing that happened. And personally I blame the lighter randomly turning on in my hand when his homework caught on fire. 

Terezi reaction: You see this falls under one of those things that was much better when I was blind. It was just silly voices and interesting music with some odd tasting colors. Now it is just this mess of confusing weirdness that makes me want to take a bat to my head. Seriously what in the fuck humans? I thought us trolls were suppose to be the messed up ones?

Aradia reaction: I am not really sure what I watched, but I think I would rather go against Noir one on one again then watch it another time. So yes… I am going to go find a nice solid object to help bludgeon the memory from my mind.

Gamzee reaction: I really don’t see what the motherfucking big deal is. It teaches a valuable motherfucking lesson. Those who are weak should be taught to think in a certain way. They should bend their mind sets to those of the people in power. Why should those who can’t stand against you deserve to enjoy their own ideas, follow motherfucking mine and you will have a great time! By me I mean of course the notebook motherfuckers, remember to be creative… but not too motherfucking creative.

Eridan reaction: Oh please I have seen things a hundred times worse then that. Anyone who is afraid of his short film is a pussy plain and simple. And yes I am perfectly fine walking around with my gun in my hands, and no I am not putting it down, also I have found a way to stop blinking. But these two things are in no relation to the film.

Feferi reaction: What the glub was that? I am not watching anything else that you people recommend. Okay maybe I will just don’t make me watch something scary again okay?

Nepeta reaction: Nepeta is currently unavailable for comment, due to her being on top of Equius’s head curled into a ball and hiding from what she describe as “evil notebooks"

[homestuckreacts]

Haha this could be funny but could the next react prompt be with the exiles? Maybe you could put their ==> actions or something?

High Editor: This looks like it might be a fun idea, but I really don't know what to have them react too! Anything you guys might want to see the exiles react to?

[homestuckreacts]

ancestors on puberty?

Main Content Maker: Hi there everyone, just a few things I want to throw out with this. First I am unsure as to whether they meant the  dancestors or the actual ancestors, so I went with what was there. Also to see the Hand Maiden and The Condesce you need to ask for a reaction from the villains. Just because it is easier to group people like Jack, English, Condense and a few others (ask for a react and find out). Also This blog now has 18 of the greatest followers a blog writer could ask for. And hopefully more to come, you guys are awesome too! Thanks for being interested in this crazy little project of mine!

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The Signless: Aw puberty is one of those things that for trolls varies from blood type to blood type. But I can tell you it was quite a challenge for me when I was on the run. Your quadrants are suddenly things that aren’t an option, they are a driving force of life. You want to find love and hate and everything in between. If it weren’t for the Dolorosa I imagine I might have been killed a few times chasing after some troll who I felt some form of connection with just because of a rouge glance between us. It is lucky that I met my Disciple, who in her own way made the concept of quadrants meaningless for me.

The Ψiioniic: Man puberty was probably the second worst time of my life. You think pan goes to shit with emotions and biological urges. Man I had eye beams flying everywhere at any given time. I couldn’t even have an emotional thought without accidentally blasting something. Trust me you do not want to see a mage who suddenly can’t control how they feel or how their body reacts to stuff.

The Summoner: Can’t say puberty was much of a thing for me. Most lowblood trolls pretty much punch through  the more awkward things due to our low life span. Well most brown bloods anyway, I don’t know about the other blood types well enough to start making assumptions for them. But for us we just lay down in our recuperacoons one day and we wake up a few days later as fully grown trolls. If you aren’t in one the process is a painful and long one, I can tell you that from experience. Three days suddenly turns into fucking sweeps of pain and agony as you feel your body stretch and grow without any control.

E%ecutor Darkleer: Puberty for trolls of my color is an experience that we wouldn’t wish on anyone. My kind are born with strength just bellow that of the highbloods, and as we mature we slowly gain control over this power. A strong emphasis on slowly. We break whatever we touch and hurt whoever we come into contact with. It is enough to drive most of us into isolation until we finally gain some form of control. And the anger that comes with it… oh trust me the highbloods anger pales in comparison to our hatred of ourselves during this time.

The Dolorosa: Growing up knowing you are going to be in a certain service is difficult growing up. But growing up as a mutation of an already divided blood type causes more problems then those already provided. Suddenly everyone hates you because of the way your teeth have shaped themselves. Or because you are stronger then them. Or because your skin can glow in the darkness of the caves. Growing up… it was not something I enjoyed doing.

Marquise Spinneret Mindfang: Puberty hm? Well that stage of my life was a right bitch I will tell you that much. For my blood type puberty involves a complete confusion of quadrants and ideas of love and hate. Honestly when I went through it I couldn’t get a quadrant straight to save my life. Red was Black, Pale was Red, and Black was Ashen. I had no idea what the fuck was going on and what I felt for who. At one point I just wanted to kill everyone so I could have some fucking peace with my emotions!

Neophyte Redglare: Puberty was a… weird time for me. My blood type during this time becomes very… strange. We begin to act in odd ways and do silly things that make no sense to us sweeps down the road. Why when I was going through it I had the strange desire to touch everything. I don’t know, looking back I couldn’t tell you what I was thinking, I just had to touch stuff! And there were other odd things too, but looking back now it is hard to remember every little silly detail.

The Grand Highblood: Oh you motherfuckers think you have it so hard with puberty, let me fucking inform you what highblood puberty is like. There are three stages in it, apathy, happiness, and motherfucking anger. Apathy is the shortest of the fucking stages, and it basically makes our ability to give a shit turn off. We can go days without doing anything, some of the weaker of us starve. Then comes happiness, which for some is the best part of our motherfucking lives. We are so happy and everything is motherfucking sugar rainbows and miracles. And then all of that disappears in the last stage, all of your happiness is pulled away by motherfucking madness and hatred. That is what puberty is for a highblood, and that is how we go on with our motherfucking lives, finding brief bits of joy in the motherfucking hatred and subjugation!

Orphaner Dualscar: Man puberty is such a non-factor for us seadwellers it is amazing. Guess everyone else just got… and I have just be informed I am only allowed to tell the truth here… which is bullshit by the way but still. At some point in a seadwellers life they will begin to go through a large stint where they begin to feel a vast need to be touched and loved. This can come off as quite pathetic to anyone who doesn’t know what is going on, and often every interaction, even pale came become mistaken for a red move on someone. This is a hard time for most seadwellers due to the fact that we come off as creeps during this time, and very few people want to be around us. 

The Disciple: Oh man I have to say that my blood type might actually get off pretty easier compared to others. All we get is a desire to hunt and eat fresh meat. This is easily taken care of by a trip to the woods and a few unlucky animals. Okay there might be one thing, but it might just be me so you know grain of salt! I loved getting into a mindset when I hunted, becoming another person as a was sneaking after the animals, pretending I was someone else and lived a completely different life! It was pretty silly looking back, but so much fun!