BEATEN AND BROKEN !

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[hopesburned]

                  STEVIE | TWENTY THREE | THEY/THEM , SHE/HER , HE/HIM , IT/ITS.

             INTEREST TRACKER

                  RULES & MUSES

                  DISCORD AVAILABLE TO MUTUALS 

[hopesburned]

right, i’ve been inactive here & really don’t see myself coming back.  you can find me on discord and are encouraged to add me there. 

[hopesburned]

right, i’ve been inactive here & really don’t see myself coming back.  you can find me on discord and are encouraged to add me there. 

[hopesburned]

@notacalavera·

                                       ❛  fair  enough,  ❜  he  muses,  though  he  can’t  deny  that  he  has  wondered  just  how  satisfying  it  would  be  to  howl  at  the  moon.  (  he  imagine  it’s  along  the  lines  of  screaming  fuck  into  the  nothingness.  )  ❛  peter…he’s  a  lot  to  handle,  ❜  noah  admits,  brows  furrowing.  he  hasn’t  had  beef  with  him,  barely  remembers  him  at  all,  but  he’s  been  filled  in  on  everything.  (  both  biased  and  unbiased  opinions  provided.  )  ❛  he  talks  about  you  a  lot,  which  makes  a  nice  change,  given  how  self  centred  he  is.  ❜  there’s  no  denying  that  peter  cares  for  malia…he’s  just  incapable  of  showing  it,  and  honestly,  from  what  noah  has  heard  and  seen,  he’s  afraid  of  those  feelings.  (  noah  is  not  a  parent,  can’t  even  begin  to  imagine  what  it  must  be  like,  in  truth.  )  ❛  my  dad  isn’t  much  better,  ❜  he  admits,  frowning  to  himself.  (  he  loves  his  father  with  every  fibre  of  his  being,  but  he  can’t  ignore  the  terrible  things  he’s  done.  )  ❛  he  once  locked  my sister  and  one  of  derek’s  betas  in  a  vault  together  for  three  months  for  some  hunger  games  battle  to  the  death  bullshit.  ❜  derek  hated  the  man  long  before  then,  and  noah  is  still  trying  to  find  out  why,  but  getting  information  from  his  brother  is  like  getting  blood  from  a  stone.  ❛  this  town…❜  he  begins,  tongue  lacing  the  inside  of  his  cheek  a  moment.  ❛  it  does  things  to  us,  all  of  us.  we’re  not  the  same  people  when  we’re  here,  always  one  edge…irritable,  irrational.  ❜  the  fire  aside,  the  hales  never  had  any  luck  with  beacon  hills.  he  knows  that  much  from  going  through  his  mother’s  journals  (  or  trying  to —-  a  lot  of  them  are  written  in  italian  and  that’s  a  language  he’s  forgotten  when  he  was  with  the  calaveras.  )  ❛  derek’s  in  new  york,  cora’s  in  rio….they’re  bother  happier  away  from  this  place.  you  probably  would  be  too.  i  know  i  sure  as  hell  am.  ❜   peter  is  welcome  up  at  eden,  though  noah  is  certain  derek  hasn’t  told  their  uncle  as  such.  even  if  he  had,  peter  has  too  much  pride  to  go  live  there  with  them,  would  never  commit  to  the  pack,  not  that  derek  enforces  his  alpha  status  all  that  much.           

       ..... truthfully, it’s very satisfying. malia refuses to outright admit it, won’t tell people that as a coyote she’s more animal than anything else. it probably isn’t difficult to tell, honestly, because she knows it’s the same for weres that shift wholly. still, though, she won’t say it out loud.   “ y’don’t say. “   she mutters, rolling her eyes slowly. peter is enough to give malia a headache just by sitting in the same room as him. it’s hard to believe her mother actually had sex with him. it’s hard to believe he managed to get anyone to like him long enough for that.   “ deucalion? “   her brows furrow, head canting to the side slightly. she’s heard stories. ( stiles likes to talk. she knows deucalion locked derek’s little sister in a vault, that he’d been the alpha of alphas, or something along those lines. she just never paid very much attention to any of that. ) he talks a little more about the family, and malia stores information away to ask others about. scott tries to tell her what he can, but he doesn’t know a lot of it either. stiles will talk about one thing and then go onto some tangent, and they never get back to the original discussion. ( she’s never met cora, either. though she is curious as to what the other is like. ) she smiles, biting the inside of her lip gently, shrugging.   “ i couldn’t leave. “   she mumbles. much like peter has too much pride to go crawling to eden with his tail between his legs, malia doesn’t think she could bring herself to leave beacon hills, either.   “ i don’t know why. i barely even speak to my pack these days, anyway. “   she hasn’t spoken to stiles since they broke up, and she barely speaks to scott. lydia sometimes drives her up the wall, and liam is. well. liam.   “ but this is, like. where my family is. was. “   she doesn’t talk to the man who had raised her, either. ( not since he’d had her committed. ) the rest of her family? dead.   “ sounds kinda dumb, when i put it like that, right? “

[hopesburned]

syntaktis·.

      she smirks and shrugs her shoulders. “ oh come on now nate, surely even you can’t pass up the opportunity to find the treasure that belongs to the illuminati. ”

          “ i can, and i am. “   he says, barely looking up from the phone in his hand. he doesn’t know how to put it, truthfully.   “ look, there’s some stuff goin’ on with me and ‘lena that i can’t just run out on and ignore while i chase treasure. “ 

[hopesburned]

chaosiica·.

     it’s a mix of childlike wonder and childlike guilt, the SCARLET WITCH worrying for his safety, and knowing him by name at all. even if he’s the one that gave her little option for it, clawing her out of her amnesiac prison. he’s not sure if any of it makes him feel like a real hero.

     ❛ … it’s okay. ❜ he knows he’s playing with fire, even thinking they can be something as big as the AVENGERS, or the X-MEN. and he’s gotten his fingers burned—— there’s a hole in their hearts where cassie and jonas used to be. but it’s like tommy said. they don’t stop fighting or the bad guys win. ❛ i have my team. ❜

      panic and worry sits heavy on her shoulders, fingers itching with want to check him over for injuries, inspect him to make sure he was fine. her brows pinch, and she sighs softly, nodding slightly. he’s fine, physically, and she drops her hands back down to her sides, fingers curled into fists.

       so sure his team will be there for him forever. she offers him a small smile, but the sad, distant look on her face never leaves.   “ i’d just like you to be safe, wiccan. “   to stay professional on the field is something she’d gotten good at.   “ it’ll stop me from having to drag you away from the action by your ear. “   an attempt to lighten the mood.   “ you’re very good at this, wiccan, but i’m still learning how to do this. so, i apologise in advance for any ...... disturbances my newfound maternal guilt might cause. “

[hopesburned]

did some stuff but now i’m just fucking exhausted

[melamemea]

right in the guts. angst sentences.

“It always comes back to this with you, doesn’t it?”

“Why can’t you just learn to let the fuck go.”

“Did it over occur to you that I never wanted this to begin with?”

“Why can’t you just look at me for one god damn second!”

“Let go of my hand.”

“I don’t want to talk to you right now.”

“Why are you — saying all these things —”

“You know what? I was wrong. You never really meant anything to me. You’re broken, you’re beyond fixing, you’re not something I want to take the time to handle. Simple as that.”

“You’re a god damn mistake, that’s what you are.”

“I never wanted anything to do with you to begin with.”

“This, us, was a fucking mistake and I should have known the second things went further than planned.”

“I can’t do this anymore.”

“I don’t want anything to do with you anymore.”

“If anything, you were a fucking waste of time.”

“I just don’t feel anything anymore.”

“Looking at you I see nothing but something I need to put an end to.”

“Oh? Really? You thought we had a future? What gave you that idea.”

“Is this even going anywhere?”

“Why can’t we just talk about it —”

“Does it ever occur to you that I am done talking? That I am done with reflecting upon my words and action? Can’t you just take a fucking hint that I’m done with you? I don’t want anything to do with you anymore.”

“We’re through. I don’t want to do this anymore.”

“You were broken to begin with.”

“How am I supposed to ‘love you’ when I never had feelings to being with.”

“Haha, I don’t know who gave you THAT idea, but we’re not an item. We never were.”

“I’d like for you to leave now.”

“Just get out. Get out and leave me alone.”

“Why are you — saying all these things??? Where did they come from???”

“If you never were happy to begin with, how come you never told me?! I would have listened, I would have helped —”

“I don’t need, or want help, what I want is for you to get the fuck away from me.”

“You’re damaged goods and I can’t find the patience to take on you as a project.”

“You’re the kind of crazy I don’t want to deal with.”

“Lately you’ve become a burden, and I can’t handle it anymore.”

“If you’d just leave me alone, that’d be great.”

“Oh come on, the second we got to know each other, the due date were already set on us. We were never meant to last forever. Our relationship had a deadline, and now we’re at it; so, what you gonna do?”

“This is all on you.”

“Save your tears. I’m done here.”

[odisn]

there’s a lot of shit going on across the world ,  but here’s the latest from the UK :  the powers that be ,  across the country ,  rejected a valid and important petition to feed vulnerable kids who can’t afford meals etc .

with school break coming up ,  a lot of kids ,  and families ,  are gonna go hungry every night ,  and basically our country doesn’t give a shit   ——————   if you can donate here to help feed them ,  then that would be incredible .   

[hopesburned]

me, staring @ my drafts: no. goodbye.

[karshmallow]

maybe a little damian wayne for the requests thing if you want to??

how little are we talking here

[chatdy]

After a lot of bad chair and back problems, I ordered myself an amazing gamer chair………..

[hopesburned]

why does it take my phone 64 years to charge up when it’s plugged into the computer it makes 0 sense

[hopesburned]

“ if i wanted to share my life’s story, harley, i would write my memoirs. “          -----          @liveslost     /     helena bertinelli.

bubblegum pops loudly, a brow raising at helena’s words. they’re short an courteous, like always, but they make harley giggle. chews her gum again, blows another bubble, and pops it.   “ jeez, ‘lena. whats got your panties in a  bunch tonight? “   she asks, propping her head up with both hands. harley shouldn’t be so amused by how easily it is to get helena into these moods, but she is.   

laughter escapes her, feet kicking out with glee, before she stands, clapping her hands together.   “ if ya do ever get ta writin’ them, let me know! i can give ya a psych eval before ya do it, for like, reasons an’ shit! “   how much fun would that be? harley thinks anyone who writes an autobiography or their own memoirs should get evaluated first.   “ oooh, it’d be so much fun! “

[hopesburned]

❛   your  thighs  make  me  want  to  sin.   ❜          -----          @syntaktis     /     kyle rayner.

cool eyes move from the paperwork on the desk, fixing the other male with a stare that’s partially amused, partially doubtful. a sip is taken from the mug in his hand, luke warm coffee forced down just so he has something to do other than acknowledge kyle’s words. he clears his throat, a brow raising slightly.   “ you’re a funny little lantern, kyle. “   his tone is playful, joking, but there’s a look in his eyes that screams that he’s confused.

a small chuckle escapes him, though, no matter how hard he might try to keep in inside.   “ no, seriously. my thighs? of all the body parts you coulda chose. “   he won’t ask for DETAILS, because he absolutely doesn’t need them. he’s gotten comments on his body since he was eleven, and while he knows that kyle means these words, it’s still hard to take it at face value.   “ i mean, it’s not like you won’t be in good company, “   he motions to the room around them, his guards by the doors, himself,   “ it’s not like we aren’t all sinners, here, blue. “   the grin on his lips is wild, borderline feral.   “ but i wouldn’t object to you comin’ over here and showin’ me. “

[hopesburned]

xheartpages​.

“Wait, you think you forgot your meds?” While Jirou couldn’t claim to know how Denki’s experience with his adhd was as intimately as he did, she did know that when taking meds, it was very strict schedule wise. Without them, it was a no brainier that he could possibly not feel well, even if it was only one day missed. While Bakugo could partially be to blame - with his rushing; even if it was for a good reason - that was something that should become second nature. Automatic. Eyes narrowed slightly, reaching across to hit his shoulder with her fist; opting to do it herself instead of sticking him with an earphone jack. For more emphasize.

“Hey, that stuff is serious!! Don’t you have a reminder on your phone or something? God knows you wouldn’t be able to remember it yourself.” The slight concern in her tone had to be leveled with the jab, especially as cheeks pinked at his inquiry; pursing lips as she narrowed her eyes at him. “No, I’m not worried– I just want to make sure you’re good, you know?”

Wait… wasn’t that the same time? Quick, add something else– “You can barely take care of yourself as it is.”

fingertips move back to the desk in front of him, drumming a soft beat onto it. kaminari’s eyes find their way back to jirou when she asks about his meds again, flashing her a signature grin. he isn’t sure if he took them or not, but he does think it leans towards the not side a little more than anywhere else.   “ you know how he is, jirou. he’s trying, he thinks he’s helping. “   he won’t begrudge bakugou the chance to be nicer to him, because he knows that in his own way, dragging him out of the dorms was him trying. 

he groans, shaking his head when she jabs him with her earphone, raising one hand to rub his shoulder.   “ ouchie. “   he pouts, looking up at her with his nose crinkled.   “ rude. “   he knows that taking his medication is important, but he doesn’t think missing one day is terrible, right? what’s the worst that could happen! he hums, resting his chin in his hand and looking across at her, a brow raising.   “ so, you are worried about me. “   he grins, a lazy little thing across his lips. he stops, his brain taking a moment to process what had been said. an indignant noise sounds in the back of his throat, eyes narrowing at her.   “ hey! i can absolutely take care of myself. “   only just, but that’s besides the point.   “ don’t be mean to me. “   he huffs, covering his face with both hands now.   “ look, i’ll set an alarm now. “   he mutters, pulling his phone out of his pocket and setting one up.   “ will you stop jabbing me with your earphones now? i bruise like a peach, you know. “

[hopesburned]

ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS THEN TAG THOSE YOU’D LIKE TO KNOW BETTER !

Feel free to delete or add questions !

nicknames:  stevie

zodiac:   aquarius

height:   5′4″

timezone:   england, i think gmt?

sexuality (if comfortable):   lesbian

favorite band / artist:   bring me the horizon, green day

last movie i saw:  uhhhhh hocus pocus

last thing i googled:  i Think it was smth to do w paying a fine lmao

average amount of sleep:  7 hours

what i’m wearing:   a grey punisher shirt and fluffy white pj bottoms, a blue dressing gown

dream job:   uhhhh chef ig?

dream trip:   man idk, rome

favorite food:  nuggies

play any instruments:  the triangle

eye color:   brown.

hair color:   naturally? blonde. currently, half bright pink and half bright purple

languages you speak:   english, passable german and passable french

most iconic song:   i constantly have the route one soundtrack from pokemon in my hed

random fact:  i have twelve piercings (:

tagged by: i stole it! tagging: whoever!