bringer of ontological vertigo

they/he }{ composer }{ writer }{ occasional philosopher

[horizoneffect]

The following is literally the easiest breakfast recipe in the entire world. It got me through quarantine unscathed and I need to tell the world about it.

Ingredients: - 1 cup flour - 1 cup milk - 1/2 cup sugar - 4 eggs

Instructions: Preheat your oven to 425F. Put an 8x11" (or similar size) glass pan into it. While the oven is heating, mix all the ingredients together. Add spices or vanilla extract if you like. Take the pan out of the oven, grease it with butter, then add the batter. Put the pan back in the oven for 12-15 minutes.

The result is a beautiful golden-brown pastry that will fluff up around the edges of the pan. You can eat it with syrup, fruit and/or powdered sugar. It takes like 20 minutes to make overall and most of that is just waiting for it to cook. It's nearly impossible to mess up; the only thing to be aware of is that you need to butter the pan well.

I don't know why I posted this; I'm not an incredibly good cook and I'm not going to cooking school or anything. But it's my favorite recipe in the entire world and I want other people to be able to enjoy it.

[bootleg-nessie]

If I were telepathic I’d be gaslighting so many people into thinking they’re schizophrenic just for fun

[horizoneffect]

i'm playing a soulknife in dnd right now and this is my entire strategy

[horizoneffect]

2d6 table for law enforcement methods in D&D

So recently I've been thinking about how to portray dystopias in D&D, which is something that's harder for me to do well than it sounds. Most of the cruelly authoritarian governments I'm familiar with existed post-1900, which doesn't vibe with D&D's fantasy setting... So I've been dredging up my historical knowledge of awful governments, and as someone working on a thievery campaign, this has made me think of different methods of law enforcement.

Feel free to use the table below either as a 2d6 table, or simply as a list of ideas. Something I realized while making this is that methods of law enforcement are intricately connected with details about the town in question: who lives there? What kind of life do they live? Urban or pastoral setting? Large town or small town? What is the town like, socially -- do people put a lot of credence in religion, their neighbors, their in-group or family, the law, reason, or technology? For this reason the table below is intentionally generic.

If anyone has recommendations for other possible methods of fantastical law enforcement (trial by ordeal involving a dark cave and a dragon?), please add them below. Also please share if you have historical inspiration for awful governments (1700s Britain, 1500s Italy, the entire history of colonialism -- seriously, the concept of the existence of a company given monarchical and therefore divine right to rule over an entire nation is ripe for inspiration imo.)

In this town, lawbreakers are detected and apprehended in the following way (roll 2d6):

2 - Everybody knows and likes everybody. There's no need for any sort of law enforcement.

3 - When a crime is committed, the members of the victim's family are honor-bound to discover the perpetrator.

4 - A religious order divines information about criminals in cases of particularly heinous or sacrilegious crime. Then, the order's knights are sent to apprehend the suspects.

5 - Wealthy noble families, who have taken on the role of steward of the town, court mercenary groups to provide security as a favor to the public.

6 - The town is policed by members of the military, who are taken from the ranks of the imperial army, or the army of an occupying power.

7 - Town guards patrol the city. In smaller towns they simply keep an eye out for trouble; in larger towns they are given a set beat; in still larger cities they are assigned to separate locations and perhaps assisted with magical defense systems.

8 - Any citizen who has been wronged can submit an appeal for aid to their lord, who, in exchange for fealty, is in charge of marshaling forces to catch the perpetrator.

9 - Roll again, ignoring other rolls of 9. One of the other systems here is in place, but has gone wrong. Citizens often rely on hiring adventurers to solve crimes, and they must contend with the danger that a corrupt form of justice poses.

10 - Vigilante organizations have formed, which keep order in return for the citizens' respect. Whether or not those organizations themselves are legal is an open question.

11 - There is no real law enforcement to speak of, because no one follows the laws. Citizens pay protection money to the city's emboldened crime syndicates, which compete for territory, subjects, and power.

12 - Crime? What crime? Under the Dread-queen, all is peace.

[horizoneffect]

thinking about piccolos during climactic moments in orchestral scoring rn. like you go girl, play your crazy 17-tuplets while the rest of the orchestra plays either block chords or the melody

[fortethebard]

What DMing looks like

[horizoneffect]

(dnd setting idea I had and couldn't not write an overview for)

"The afterworld is a big place. Well, the word "afterworld" is a misnomer. It's called the Beyond, and it's less one world, more a patchwork of worlds. Gods, powerful fey and fiends, unknowable eldritch beings, and all sorts of extraordinarily powerful entities have stitched together the vacuous reaches of the Beyond with demiplanes of their own making, populated by the souls of mortals who have passed on.

"It's a popular myth among the mortal sort that travel to the Beyond is instant, almost automatic, free from frustration, nuisance or pain. That couldn't be less true. When a mortal dies and its soul becomes untethered from its body, sure, sometimes it will automatically be whisked away to its proper afterlife. Some gods reward their true believers with chartered air-carriages to their private villas in the clouds. People who have made pacts with devils get pressed onto the black prison-ships of the lower planes and are made to swab the deck. But loose souls, souls who are unclaimed by any of the powers that be, get sent…

"to me. Me and my train, the Twilight Express. Any soul, any race, any final resting place. Anyone with a ticket, me and my crew'll take you to where you need to go. But not for free.

"When you mortals finally give up the ghost, death is but an instant, and then you'll find yourself in Nowhere, the City of Horizons. Loud and noisy, filled with the clamor of countless shopkeepers searching for souls to sell to. What are they selling, you ask? Tickets -- tickets to the afterlife. Their own precious little part of the afterlife, that is.

"Some of them will give you a ticket for free. I say don't listen to them -- it's a scam, unless you were really someone in life, and then everyone will be after your soul. Some will offer you a ticket to their afterlife if you promise to serve their god, or entertain their legions of souls, or work in their manor's kitchen, or accomplish some heroic task in one of the countless planes. You need a ticket to ride the train, though, and the merchants in Nowhere know. Picture the gleeful servant of some pit fiend, offering you passage to the Lava Pits of Czsnerzbeogh, if only you'll work for their master for twenty thousand years of eternity… But if they're offering a ticket, take it. Believe me. You don't want to be stuck in Nowhere without a ticket. The most hellish tortures are preferable to the unconscionable horrors the City of Horizons can unveil, horrors that make even me shudder… And you really don't want to be stuck in Nowhere after the train leaves… and it gets dark.

"Once you're on the train, though, watch your back. Regardless of destination, every soul gets the same ride. Scary as some of the particularly damned souls may be, don't panic: it's a really bad idea to cross our security. They're the finest forces in the infinity of the planes, making sure every soul only gets off where their ticket says they can, and keeping out the freeloaders and the riffraff. Out the window you'll be awed by the full grandeur of the Beyond: the breathtaking spires of the Green Palm Palaces, the bleak austerity of the Xulo Nara Lava Oceans, the quixotic unreality of the Thousand Lotus Fields… And between the afterworlds, the expanses of the Great Grey West, where lone fey rangers camp by lone fires, where packs of crest-wolves and fractal-horn deer stampede across the landscape… It'll make you feel alive again. So to speak.

"As soon as you make it to your stop on the Twilight Express, you'll get off, and then you get to enjoy your afterlife, whatever that may be. You might even be allowed to travel around the Beyond and explore other afterlives, or you can stay put and be content with a nice, quiet undeath. But things are always changing in the Beyond. We're always laying down new railways, paving into the west… There are those who wish to escape their assigned afterlife and wreak havoc across the planes… And there are those who wish to conquer the Beyond and the world of the mortal planes, along with those who wish to keep the Beyond ever wild…

"Don't be a stranger, mortal. Be courageous, be cautious, and always watch your back.

Talk to you soon.

- Death The Renowned Sir R. "Death" Nevermore Proprietor and Conductor of the Twilight Express

[pikestaff]

"Stop saying 15 year olds with weird interests are cringe, they're 15" this is true however you should also stop saying adults with weird interests are cringe because who gives a shit

[themythicalcodfish]

To wit:

[switchelsweets]

I want to share some wisdom from my high school art teacher.

In my AP Art class, there was a girl who was just starting to experiment with mixed media. At this point she was still playing around, trying to decide what direction she wanted to go with her portfolio. So one critique day, she brought in an abstract canvas with some rhinestone highlights and painted and real peacock feathers. She loved sparkles and peacock feathers so she thought she’d try introducing them a *little*. And after everyone had given some input, the teacher gave her his advice, VERY roughly paraphrased here:

“So here’s the thing… I do not like this style. These are just elements that do not speak to me personally, but I see that you like them, and you’re doing interesting things with them.

“My biggest critique is, I only merely *dislike* this piece. I want you to make me HATE it. Go crazy with the things that you like. Don’t hold back trying to make it palatable to people like me. Because I am NEVER going to like it. And if the audience does not like it, it should drive them crazy seeing how much YOU love it.”

Her portfolio was chock full of neon colors and glitter and rhinestones and splashes of peacock feathers and it was a delight. Our teacher despised every piece lol, but she got great marks and I think even won some awards. And more importantly, she was happy and proud of the results. Because she didn’t limit herself by trying to appeal to people who were never going to enjoy what she enjoyed.

Takeaway here: be as cringe as you want. Don’t limit yourself based on other ppl’s tastes. They’re not you, and you are incredible 💕

[horizoneffect]

answer the poll, i need help worldbuilding

fantasy settings where the angels/celestials/whatever are actually evil are...

not overdone

overdone

overdone, but trying to subvert/deconstruct the trope is even worse

Voting ended onJul 12, 2023

feel free to add more nuance in the comments, anything helps <3

[horizoneffect]

i'm both a writer and a composer. this has changed the way i compose.

i write scores on my computer most of the time so when i want to leave a note for myself i do it with staff text. when i write these notes i don't have to make them make sense to anyone but myself, which is a nice break from focusing on writing 'correctly'.

so some of my more recent scores have included the following notes:

are the brass even doing anything?

because of that reason i am not too sure of the cello

I'm going to keep the awesome pizzicatoey

harp pedals all natural organic

the flute should go like C E F trtrtrtrtrtrtrtrtrtrtr

[blastyourspeakers]

"Now, back in our town as a castaway I'm reminded of the time it all fell in line, on the third of May As if it were designed, painted in sand to be washed away Oh, but I can hear you, loud in the center Aren't we made to be crowded together, like leaves?"

[horizoneffect]

i love this song so much for so many different reasons, which means i've listened to it hundreds upon thousands of times. if you'll bear with the music nerd in me, it took me quite a while to appreciate how:

the song starts in e-flat major. at 3:28, it sounds like it goes to e-flat minor, but if you listen carefully to the melody (when robin sings "if i lead you through the fury will you call to me"), it's actually in e-flat dorian, which is slightly "brighter" than e-flat minor is. => there's a little bit of "brightness" yet in the incredibly dramatic and dark second part of the song

"i am only owed this shape if i make a line to hold / to be held within oneself is deathlike, oh i know" is the ultimate statement of the song's lesson. but it sounds like someone banging their head against a wall. => important lessons don't come easy

after around 6:43 there is actually a distinct rhythm which isn't too hard to pick out, it's not just layers of instruments playing over each other

the drums try to trick your ear after 3:28 so that you don't expect robin to start singing again

[horizoneffect]

not sure what to write for my first post here, so:

| 6 5 1 25 3 | 25 3 1 2 6 5 |

the melody of pictures at an exhibition by modest mussorgsky, and also a secret alphabetical cipher that yields the fascinating, inscrutable hidden message "feayc ycabfe"