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Hello! I'm sorta abandoning my previous tumblr at little--abby to start fresh. Have a proper art/fandom tumblr ya know! Im 22 as of 2020 and I use she/her pronouns. 

[catchymemes]

[horrorsweetie]

You know figuring out sexuality is a Rollercoaster.

I'm a woman who was comfortable with the idea of being bisexual but still questioning.. but then a woman I haven't seen in like 9 years messages me about seeing each other and spending time together. Possibly helping me figure out if I am indeed attracted to women. I'm falling all over myself like I'm in a dumb romantic movie.

Then over the past 3 days I'm realizing I've never felt this strongly about a man. I don't think I've ever felt anything with men the more I think about it.

My first boyfriend was just the first guy to show my 15 year old self attention. He turned out to be a mistake but I was naive

My second was nice but I never felt a rush of excitement. I was just kina existing in it.

I've been single now for about 5 or 6 years and I've never really saw a guy. If one tried to show interest I got weird and ended up pushing them away. Then at the same time I'd lament about being lonely and possibly never marrying despite wanting to and wanting to have a family.

Now I'm still questioning but maybe I'm not bi. Maybe I'm a lesbian? Maybe I've been confusing platonic love for romantic with men.

[horrorsweetie]

Does anyone else’s daydreams mesh in with reality? Like they coexist inside each other despite different things happenin. The best way I can visualize it is like the ending of Alice the Madness returns where Wonderland fuses with reality.  I know for me; Im coworkers with some of the characters and other characters are regulars that visit me and follow me while I work. or we go shopping together and kina live a domestic life while also going on adventures and dealing with stuff. So it’s almost like I’m constantly in my innerworld. 

[trashandwriting]

Things only maladaptive daydreamers know

Spending literal days in certain situations in your own reality. Nights even.

Making faces and moving lips when imagining stuff, then realising and hoping no one saw it

Having heated arguments by yourself in your room.

Spicing up everything you do with your imagination. Learning? Your suddenly a professor and have to explain that stuff to your students. Cleaning? Your comfort character is watching you while you hum songs while doing it.

h o r n y

Either not being able to watch the show/movie your reality is based of without stopping every five minutes and acting out a scene or obsessively watching this and nothing else.

Trauma

Creating whole musicals and music videos to your favourite songs in your mind

Watching something from the show/movie your reality is based on and thinking "this is so wrong. This happend differently. I live here, I should know"

Either sleeping in with your comfort character next to you every night or just imagining scenes.

Sudden conversations that make no sense to anyone but you

Weird or really violent imagination (torture, being captured and abused ect.)

Not often dreaming about your own reality even though you practically live there every day (or is it just me?)

Googling "imaginary friends at age [...] normal?" in your teenage years

Thinking they be gone soon but here you are, maladaptivly daydreaming your problems away.

Improving your character and your story so often that it's now so detailed you could write literally about ten to twelve books about it. Fuck.

[horrorsweetie]

Ah, so this is what I’ve been doing my entire life! My parents never grew concerned about it, they just told me not to move my lips or act out in public or else people might think I’m crazy.  Hearing “just write down the scenarios and it’ll stop! That’s how I stopped mine when I was younger” was very common for me to hear from my mother It hasn’t stopped and I’m 23

[horrorsweetie]

I have been working on a long furby of my own!! He is 6 feet long and so far I’ve finished George’s body and stuffed it but his head isn’t attached yet because I need to print him a faceplate. Which according my father; the keeper of the 3d printer, the part he needs to replace will be here round tuesday so hopefully we can get the faceplate started then. I used FurbyFuzz’s and Daft Furby’s patterns since i didn’t have the heart to tear apart a furby buddy. 

[krissiegore]

superb owl

[horrorsweetie]

I am in the midst of crocheting a sweater with no pattern! I go super inspired by crocheted sweaters on tiktok and goblincore so I needed a handmade stripey sweater. I’m also writing everything down as I go so maybe I can turn it into a proper pattern at some point.

[horrorsweetie]

I found a friend on the door! I wonder if it’ll rain later tonight for him

[horrorsweetie]

anyone else get like super happy to see the tiny fuzzy moss in the cracks of concrete sidewalks?  just me? okie 

[horrorsweetie]

Jalapenos maybe?

I found some seeds i forgot i had and since I live in a place where there’s warm winters I figure I’d scatter some of them in my planter outside. Perhaps in the next few weeks I’ll see some sprouts!!  playing the dirt was nice, and it was still damp and kinda cold from the storm last night. 

[dollarstorenonbinary]

Goblincore Things That Comfort:

1.) Fingerless gloves

2.) Hoodies

3.) Sweaters

4.) Plants

5.) Mushrooms

6.) Crystals and rocks

7.) Tea

8.) The woods and streams

[horrorsweetie]

Made a little friend! I haven’t named him yet though. I gave him the top of a fly agaric mushroom even embroidered little french knots to give him texture!  I used a pattern written by CritterStitchDesigns on etsy!! 

[horrorsweetie]

Big oof

2/6/21 this has been empty for a while. been trying to think of what i should fill it with and other small details.  I’ve always been kina a person with many interests, but i always see other blogs that focus on one thing or maybe two or 3. I suppose I can start with my hyperfixations which are currently  Goblincore and other similar aesthetics, Invader Zim, and clowns  maybe i might hold off on the clowns since coulrophobia is a thing, but only until i figure out how tw tags work