I’m attracted to fictional men and women and real life women; I have dated a few men, but I wasn’t super happy in those relationships because they weren’t the best guys tbh and I only had sex with one of the guys I dated and I hated it, so I’m turned off from dating real life men ever again. I only want to date real life women. I have been rumored to be a lesbian when I was in college; I was asked if I was a lesbian from how I used my tongue to get crab meat out of a snow crab leg (yes, this really did happen); and I was told by a now former guy friend, “Just come out as a lesbian already!”. Does any of this count as being bi or lesbian?? 🤔🤷🏻♀️ (I’m also Graysexual.)
Rant that started about my journey with my sexuality and ends with me questioning it under the cut (warning: post made by a demiboy(-ish, weird confusing gender) who who saw that the white stripe in the lesbian flag means "having a unique relationship with womanhood" and not "being a woman" and agrees with that fully. If you don't like this, please go away from here because I'm being kinda vulnerable bye bye pls thanks ˃̶͈◡˂̶͈)
My journey with my sexuality is very funny. Because it started with me having a crush on my best friend when I was a little girl in second grade and deciding that made me a lesbian
And then I realized I wasn't a girl and started having fictional crushes on guys
I then had my first actual relationship with someone who identified as a man (while we were dating) and I was like wow. I felt almost no romantic attraction to that guy and what I did felt really forced.
And also I'm only ever really romantically attracted to women I think? But almost (<- important) every fictional character I've ever been romantically or sexually attracted too was a man
And also recently my gender got really fucky, I made a different post about that specifically under the tag #littlebighorse ranting
All I know right now is I'm not attracted to people who present androgynously/neutrally (noninsexual) (nonbinaries who present femininely or masculinely? Good. Men who present masculinely or femininely? Good women who present masculinely or femininely? Amazing lovely wonderful there is nothing better.)
Also every time I have a fictional crush on a male character it's in an I want to beat him to death with so so so many weapons way
And I a lot of the time I end up headcanoning them as transfem or using she/her or just as women or as lesbians who don't fall under the category of women and becoming so attached to that headcanon it's difficult to see the character from another lense
And when I very rarely AM attracted to guys irl it's feminine guys only or the idea of a non feminine guy dressing femininely.
But I'm going to not think about all of those things actually I'm gonna post this and then pretend it dosent exist smiley face
Y'all know that feeling where you're like, "I prefer women", but there's also that small corner of your brain that's like "but closing off that other side entirely, how very sexist" and that other, smaller corner reserved for those few people who you'd love forever regardless of gender
Having my second sexuality crisis smh
🏳️🌈Questioning Lesbians 21+ Discord Server🏳️🌈
Hello! Are you 21+ and questioning if you're a lesbian? Or, are you 21+ and know you are a lesbian? This server is a safe place for adults 21 and older to build community and get support from others who are also questioning lesbians/lesbians. Open to trans women, cis women, and non-binary people--just not men!
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