Photos & Stuff

Heather Polley Photography My photos, photos by others, Japanese prints, Polaroids, Andy Goldsworthy, silent film, new music and classical music, Sufjan Stevens, DM Stith, whatever I'm listening to right now. {Due to Tumblr's reign of copyright terror, I had to delete most of the music I uploaded over the years.} My Website Instagram About Me var _gaq = _gaq || []; _gaq.push(['_setAccount', 'UA-22336232-1']); _gaq.push(['_trackPageview']); (function() { var ga = document.createElement('script'); ga.type = 'text/javascript'; ga.async = true; ga.src = ('https:' == document.location.protocol ? 'https://ssl' : 'http://www') + '.google-analytics.com/ga.js'; var s = document.getElementsByTagName('script')[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(ga, s); })();

[staff]

🚨 The FCC plans to kill net neutrality on December 14 🚨

It’s real simple: ISP lobbyists are pushing the FCC to kill net neutrality so phone and cable companies can block apps, slow down websites, and charge fees to control what you see and do online.

Our only chance is congressional pressure and legislative action. But we need grassroots support. Tell your representatives that you support “Title 2” rules and ask for their help protecting a free and open internet.

Go to Battle For The Net to be connected to your congresspeople. 

[fuckyeahthenational]

Matt Berninger dancing to Tom Petty

[rairun]

I found this comment on genius.com, and while I don’t agree that there are two monologues by two different people, I thought it was really cool to read those lines in isolation. And here are the lines that they excluded:

And I am gentle And I am faithful And I am weightless And I am speechless And I am confident And I am steadfast And I am consequence And I am sorry

And I am sorry And I am desperate And I am restless And I am gentle And I am desperate And I am evidence And I am faithless Now I am messed up

I read the first “monologue” as the speaker trying to articulate what has happened to him, and the second as the emotions that crop up as he does so.

I do think that Mercury is the interlocutor here, and Mercury stands for… something, or someone? What I find brilliant is that Mercury seems to represent life (or the universe, or god), but it is also a very specific individual in the speaker’s life, a friend he has lost. On the one hand, he abstracts the loss of one person and considers how lost he feels in the world; on the other hand, the vagaries of the universe are very much personified in his friend. And Mercury is the god Mercury, but it is also the planet, and you can picture it inevitably going around its orbit, moving away; and when Sufjan sings, “Where do you run to, carrier friend?”, he knows his question won’t change its course. He knows it won’t make his friend return.

And what I love the most about the song is that it is not bitter. It is gentle. And he is gentle. And he is sorry, and desperate, and restless, and gentle, and desperate, all at once. What gets to me is that I know what it is like to feel lost, to feel like your life is stuck in vain. I also know what it is like to start getting to know people and rebuilding your life, to start seeing possibility where there used to be none. And for a moment there, when you are only beginning to find your footing, you are very much aware that it is not fair to see any one person as your personal savior; it is not fair to place such a huge responsibility on anyone, because they are a person just like you are, and you love them as one, not as a solution. But you also can’t ignore the fact that without them you are back to square one.

“Mercury” is about the fear of falling back into that dark, lonely, possibility-less place; but it is also tender in its recognition of the humanity of others. It is gentle in its acknowledgement that your loved ones don’t exist to love you. And when Sufjan sings “Where do you run to?”, this is as much about being desperate as it is about being genuinely concerned - it is about hoping that your friend, wherever he or she is, is okay out there. It is about finding love beyond your needs, in spite of your needs.

[hpolleyphotography]

This encompasses a lot of my thoughts on these lyrics that have given me the feels since the bootlegs surfaced five years ago. So many of his lyrics have multiple layers of meaning and interpretation, the key to great lyrics and great storytelling. Amazing that in interviews he thinks all he did for the lyrics was throw together random facts he researched on the internet.

[sufjanlive]

Carrie & Lowell Live II [Video]

This is a fan-made compilation of the 2015 European Tour. Please share freely. Do not sell. Support the artists whenever you can. You can watch it on YouTube or download the highest bitrate version below. Please avoid transcoding it except for personal use. 01. Redford (For Yia-Yia and Pappou) [06/09 Bristol, UK] 02. Death With Dignity [02/09 London, UK] 03. Should Have Known Better [02/09 London, UK] 04. Drawn to the Blood [29/08 Edinburgh, UK] 05. All of Me Wants All Of You [03/09 London, UK] 06. Eugene [04/09 Brighton, UK] 07. John My Beloved [04/09 Brighton, UK] 08. The Only Thing [02/09 London, UK] 09. Fourth of July [04/09 Brighton, UK] 10. No Shade in the Shadow of the Cross [29/08 Edinburgh, UK] 11. Carrie & Lowell [03/09 London, UK] 12. The Owl and the Tanager [04/09 Brighton, UK] 13. Vesuvius [03/09 London, UK] 14. I Want to Be Well [29/09 Barcelona, UK] 15. Blue Bucket of Gold [03/09 London, UK] 16. Blue Bucket Outro [03/09 London, UK]

17. Concerning the UFO Sighting Near Highland, IL [31/08 Manchester, UK] 18. Sister [03/09 London, UK] 19. “The privilege of anxiety about our mortality” [03/09 London, UK] 20. Heirloom [03/09 London, UK] 21. “The official animal of Scotland is the unicorn” [29/08 Edinburgh, UK] 22. For the Widows in Paradise, For the Fatherless in Ypsilanti [29/08 Edinburgh, UK] 23. In the Devil’s Territory [02/09 London, UK] 24. Futile Devices [02/09 London, UK] 25. “So many trick questions about dazzling” [02/09 London, UK] 26. The Dress Looks Nice on You [02/09 London, UK] 27. To Be Alone with You [29/08 Edinburgh, UK] 28. John Wayne Gacy, Jr. [03/09 London, UK] 29. “I want to introduce the band” [31/08 Manchester, UK] 30. Chicago [31/08 Manchester, UK] Performed by: Sufjan Stevens Casey Foubert Dawn Landes James McAlister Steve Moore Bryce Dessner Nico Muhly Edited by: Rairun Video by: Rairun LysWantTwo Franienj S0phie92 Audio by: Rairun

Download

[nymeth]

To have without holding by Marge Piercy

Learning to love differently is hard, love with the hands wide open, love with the doors banging on their hinges, the cupboard unlocked, the wind roaring and whimpering in the rooms rustling the sheets and snapping the blinds that thwack like rubber bands in an open palm.

It hurts to love wide open stretching the muscles that feel as if they are made of wet plaster, then of blunt knives, then of sharp knives.

It hurts to thwart the reflexes of grab, of clutch; to love and let go again and again. It pesters to remember the lover who is not in the bed, to hold back what is owed to the work that gutters like a candle in a cave without air, to love consciously, conscientiously, concretely, constructively.

I can’t do it, you say it’s killing me, but you thrive, you glow on the street like a neon raspberry, You float and sail, a helium balloon bright bachelor’s button blue and bobbing on the cold and hot winds of our breath, as we make and unmake in passionate diastole and systole the rhythm of our unbound bonding, to have and not to hold, to love with minimized malice, hunger and anger moment by moment balanced.

[hpolleyphotography]

Ocean Beach Overlook by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Day Five, Image Two of Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Expired Impossible Project Color SX-70 Gen 2.0 film, SX-70 Alpha-1 camera.

[hpolleyphotography]

Ocean Beach by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Day Five, Image One of Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Expired Impossible Project Color SX-70 Gen 2.0 film, SX-70 Alpha-1 camera.

[hpolleyphotography]

Red Tulips, Green Chair at Filoli by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Day Four, Image Two for Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Polaroid SX-70 Alpha-1 Camera, Impossible Project Color 600 Gen 3 beta film, shot in subdued light with exposure dial all the way to dark (no ND filter).

[hpolleyphotography]

Tulips in the Glass House, Filoli by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Day Three, Image Two for Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Polaroid SX-70 Alpha-1 Camera, Impossible Project Color 600 Gen 3 beta film, shot in subdued light with exposure dial all the way to dark (no ND filter).

[hpolleyphotography]

Pink Flowers at Filoli by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Day Four, Image One for Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Polaroid SX-70 Alpha-1 Camera, Impossible Project Color 600 Gen 3 beta film, shot in subdued light with exposure dial all the way to dark (no ND filter).

[hpolleyphotography]

Cherry Blossoms at Filoli by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Day Three, Image one for Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Polaroid SX-70 Alpha-1 Camera, Impossible Project Color 600 Gen 3 beta film, shot in subdued light with exposure dial all the way to dark (no ND filter).

[hpolleyphotography]

Sigur Rós at Civic Auditorium, San Francisco by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Day Two, Image Two of Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Impossible Project Color 600 Gen 3 beta film (01/17), Impossible Instant Lab. Source image taken April 2013.

[hpolleyphotography]

Matt Berninger of The National at the Greek Theatre Berkeley by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Day Two, Image One of Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Impossible Project BW I-Type Film (07/16), Impossible Instant Lab. Source image taken April 2014.

[hpolleyphotography]

New Regime by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Day One, Image Two for Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Impossible Project BW I-Type film (07/16), Impossible Instant Lab. Self-Portraits. This is what I wrote on February 26, the day I shot these frames: It is time for me to express this strange localized anxiety caused by the new regime. While my own life is just fine right now, I hear the news of the day and feel a sudden need to block out the world. It's only been a month, but I'm exhausted. I'm already familiar with low-level constant panic. I often want to roll up in a fetal position and block up my ears.

[hpolleyphotography]

Spring Top by Heather Polley Via Flickr: Happy Polaroid Week! Day One, Image One of Polaroid Week Spring 2017. Expired Impossible Project BW film for Impossible Cameras (from 04/14, thanks for the film, Jes!), Impossible Instant Lab. Self portrait taken on the first warm day in months.

[hpolleyphotography]

Mount Eerie (Phil Elverum) played his new songs in Oakland last night. It was an unforgettable, emotionally naked, and beautiful performance. Anybody who has been touched by loss will feel it deeply.

[hpolleyphotography]

Sigur Rós at Greek Theatre Berkeley, April 8, 2017. Photo by Heather Polley (please do not delete credit)