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Father and Daughter Relation
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7 harsh truths that will make you a stronger person
We often find it hard to admit our own weaknesses, and we constantly make excuses for ourselves and others. We spend the majority of our lives waiting: waiting for something to happen, waiting for something to end, waiting for something to begin. But that ‘something’ is most definitely life itself. So why are we waiting? It’s time to face the harsh truth of life and begin to work on ourselves right now without delay.
1. Nobody is actually too busy to respond to you
That boy or girl isn’t too busy to text you back. And your potential employer isn’t too loaded with work to get in touch. Remember, people make time for who they want to make time for. We text, call, and reply to the people we want to talk to.
If you don’t get a response from someone it’s because they have deliberately chosen not to answer you. The sooner you stop making excuses for people who treat you badly, the sooner you can get closer to the people who respect you.
2. Everyone puts their own interests first
No matter how loving, kindhearted, and caring a person is, they will always put their own interests ahead of yours. Even the most attentive lover may not know which ’button’ to push, unless you give them a hint. Even the most honest employer may not be aware they’re driving you into the ground if you keep accepting more work.
Most people just take as much from you as they can get, no matter what. So try to establish your own limits, and don’t allow other people to stretch them. Strong people are not afraid to say ’no’ or speak up when necessary. They know that they have to stick up for themselves because no one else is going to.
3. It’s impossible to keep everyone happy
If you did everything that every single person in your life told you to do, you’d probably go mad or would end up a lifeless, shapeless, emotionless blob.
The truth is, you can never please everyone. You can try, of course, but you will never succeed. There will always be someone who will disapprove of your choices or your way of life. You will be criticized no matter what you do. So make the decision that is right for you, and have the courage to pursue what you feel is right. The only judge you have to please is yourself.
4. The world owes you absolutely nothing
You could be the coolest, the smartest, and the most interesting person in the world but if no one except you is aware of all these wonderful traits, you’ll get nothing out of them.
There are only two basic choices available: you can spend your entire life feeling sorry for yourself because you deserve more than you’re getting, or you can step into the world and take what you want. Guess which choice successful people make?
5. You make excuses for yourself
You can spend your entire life blaming the world or others that you don’t have enough time, money, energy, or resources to accomplish your goals. And while your words may make some sense, actually the harsh truth is that every single person in this world has at least one damn good excuse for not living the life they want.
The people who get the most out of life don’t make excuses. They find ways to overcome obstacles instead of being disrupted by them. This is why they always succeed.
6. Your actions define you, not your thoughts
You can sit indoors all day thinking of a better world for us, but until you get out and start doing something you’re not actually making a difference. The ability to make big plans is a good thing, but unless it is coupled with action towards your goals, then it is all in vain. Remember: we are judged by our actions, not our intentions.
7. Nobody will save you from your life
In life, we are always waiting for something. We are either waiting to meet the right person, waiting for a dream to come true, or waiting for that job callback. When we’re unhappy with our current situation, we irrationally hope for a miracle that will help us to cope with all our problems.
But the truth is that life doesn’t work that way. Problems cannot be solved with a magic wand. If you want to make a change in your life and be more than you’ve been, you have to be the one that takes the steps towards your goals.
The strongest people know this simple truth: when times get tough, you don’t need to wait for someone to help or do something for you — you should rely only on yourself.
Based on materials from thoughtcatalog
Source: Brightside.me
10 illustrations showing the pure happiness of being a mom of a daughter
A child of any gender is, of course, a gift. But having a daughter gives a mother an opportunity to live her childhood once again, sharing all her secrets and unique experiences. And maybe it’s a chance to take another look at yourself.
Growing up, daughters find their own paths and role models. But in the beginning of life, mothers alone are those important people we look up to. But quite often they remain our heroes for life.
Getting excited about watching ‘girly’ movies
Cooking the most delicious food ever and creating a cozy atmosphere together
Fooling around and laughing like they are both two little girls
Traveling and exploring this big world
Dressing up because sometimes it’s so essential
Enjoying moments that are so hard to describe with words but so easy to feel with the heart
Getting lost in the music that comes from the heart
Helping each other to look incredibly beautiful
Forgetting about the time and dipping into the world of creativity
Chatting about everything, listening to each other, and understanding each other
Illustrated by Zhanna Bulankova for BrightSide.me
Source: Brightside.me
HAPPINESS: A psychologist’s advice on how changing your mindset can help you achieve happiness
It may seem pretty straightforward: either you’re happy or you’re not, and there’s nothing you can do to actually nudge yourself into this lovely state of mind. Well, as it turns out, you CAN learn to be happy! All you need is a bit of perseverance and the willingness to adopt some new positive habits. An article written by Martin Seligman attracted worldwide attention by listing the 21 habits that all genuinely happy people appear to share.
Let’s be happy already!
In 2004, Martin Seligman, the father of ’positive psychology,’ formulated the following three types of happiness-inducing lifestyles:
Living at your leisure, filling your life with as many pleasant emotions as it can accommodate.
Leading a life of care and commitment, finding happiness in work, parenting, love and well-deserved relaxation.
Striving to fill your life with meaning by finding out your strengths and using them to start living for something bigger than yourself.
Seligman conducted research entitled ’What makes people feel most satisfied with life’ and came up with highly surprising results. Apparently, the pursuit of pleasure has virtually nothing to do with achieving true happiness. Hedonism is merely the icing on a cake whose main ingredients invariably turn out to be either a sense of commitment or meaning.
This may sound like an attempt to justify what many people call ’living a life not wasted,’ but all genuinely happy individuals really do have certain habits that the rest of us would be wise to adopt. Quite possibly, they will change your life for the better!
21 habits that most happy people tend to share.
1. They surround themselves with other happy people
Joy is contagious. Researchers from the Framingham Heart Study have been scrutinizing the phenomenon of the ’viral’ spread of happiness for over 20 years. They have found that being surrounded by happy people makes a person more likely to find happiness in the future. Sounds like reason enough to ditch some of your dreary old friends in favor of more cheerful new ones.
2. They smile a lot
Even if you don’t feel particularly cheerful, try to think of something nice and don’t forget to smile at that thought. This really should help. It is important, however, that you don’t merely pretend to be cheerful — smiling while thinking unhappy thoughts will only make things worse.
3. They develop their ability to recover
Psychologists believe that our ability to recover from bad news is the true antidote against depression. Happy people know how to bounce back from a shock. In a sense, this is a natural weapon against all the inevitable bad stuff we all have to deal with throughout our lives. As the old Japanese saying goes: ’Fall seven times, stand up eight.’
4. They actually try to be happy
Yeah, it’s as simple as it sounds. Simply trying to be happy greatly improves your emotional well-being.
5. They pay attention to little victories
It is very important to celebrate all of your significant and hard-won achievements. However, genuinely happy people never miss the chance to enjoy small victories and good developments as well. Pausing to notice all these smaller positive things gives you additional emotional feedback that helps you stay cheerful throughout the day.
6. They appreciate life’s simple pleasures
Having an ice cream on a bench in the park, patting a dog behind the ear, feasting your eyes on a rainbow. Happy people know how to value those insignificant pleasant things that come to us uncalled and don’t cost anything to anybody. This ability to find reasons for joy in small things, to feel grateful for everything that you have, is directly connected with becoming a happy and fulfilled individual.
7. They dedicate part of their time to giving
No matter how busy their daily schedule is, positively minded people make sure to allot some of their time to committing good deeds. And, interestingly enough, those good deeds have a tendency to eventually ’return to sender’! By doing something nice for others, we enrich our own lives as well. Be it voluntary work or simple acts of kindness, such activity has a beneficial effect on one’s physical and mental condition. What’s more, it acts as a good defense against depression. Psychologists have even coined the term ’giver’s high,’ likening the joy of helping others to a drug-induced state of bliss. In some ways, this is a good comparison: charitable behavior triggers the secretion of dopamine, which gives us feelings of elation and euphoria.
8. They allow themselves to lose track of time
Whenever we are immersed in something very complex, inspiring, and meaningful, we experience a unique state known as the ’Flow.’ Happy people are subconsciously looking for activities that allow them to test their skills and motivation in pursuit of some challenging and well-defined goal. They actively pursue the ’Flow,’ knowing that it will sweep them along towards success!
9. They prefer meaningful conversations to shallow chit-chat
There’s nothing wrong with exchanging a few lightweight phrases with your pals, but only a deep, substantial conversation can help you make sense of your life. To put it simply, a proper conversation is far more rewarding than mindless ’blah-blah-blah.’ One of the five main regrets expressed by terminally ill people is ’I wish I had been less reserved about discussing my emotions.’ A poignant proof of the fact that we spend too much time chatting about the weather while failing to express the really important things that fill our hearts to the brim.
10. They spend money on others
Money can buy you happiness. But only if you spend it not only on yourself but on other people. To give is better than to take.
11. They know how to listen
When you listen, you open yourself up to new knowledge. When you speak, you close your mind shut. By demonstrating your ability to listen, you display both your self-confidence and your respect for the speaker. This inevitably makes people appreciate you, which, in turn, makes you feel happier. The ability to listen is a skill that strengthens relationships.
12. They keep in touch
When it comes to communication, sending a text, making a phone call, or posting something online are the quickest and simplest options. However, none of them can beat crossing half the country by plane to pay a long-awaited visit to your best friend! All of us need to feel connected to other people. We’ve got to communicate with our nearest and dearest, and this doesn’t mean using social networks. You cannot hug someone via Facebook. It has long been proven that, for humans, touching and being touched is high on the list of things that increase our sense of happiness and comfort.
13. They see the good in everything
Optimism is beneficial for your health: less stress means fewer heart problems and a higher tolerance to pain. By choosing to deliberately see the good in everything that happens, you undoubtedly choose health and happiness!
In one of his books, Seligman gives what is considered to be one of the best characterizations of optimists and pessimists: ’The defining characteristic of pessimists is their belief that the bad times will last long, that they will bring about the destruction of everything that has been achieved, and that all of this is their own (pessimists’) fault. Now, optimists have to confront exactly the same kinds of life’s difficulties, yet they tend to think of them in the opposite way. They believe that all misfortunes are temporary, that none of it is their fault (instead preferring to blame circumstances, bad luck, or other people). Such people aren’t worried by defeat. Surrounded by problems, they perceive them as challenges and simply try harder.’
14. They appreciate good music
There is power in music, and it is so strong that it can compete with the power of massage. Choosing the right music is an important factor — cheerful or moody songs can affect our perception of the world. In one study, participants were asked to determine from photographs whether the people depicted in them were feeling happy or sad. In most cases, their responses appeared to have a correlation with the mood of the music that test subjects were listening to at the moment of being photographed. This goes to prove that you should try to listen to more happy tunes!
15. They know when to log off
Amazing technologies, constant news updates, the sheer abundance of information — none of this will be lost to you forever just because you choose to temporarily abandon your computer, tablet, or smartphone! Digital detox gives your brain the opportunity to recharge and relax.
16. They engage in spiritual practices
The expression of gratitude, sympathy, and compassion forms an important part of almost any religion. Thinking about ’big questions’ gives our lives context and meaning. In 2009, a study was conducted which showed that children who believe that their life has a purpose and a higher predestination are happier than those among their peers who live for the moment. And it’s not just religion, of course — the same is true for all spiritual practices. All kinds of ’sacred rituals’ are important — be it meditating, praying, or simply pausing to reflect on one’s place in the world. It doesn’t really matter whether you do it on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis. What truly counts is to have some kind of spiritual anchor that’ll give your life balance and meaning and help you to recuperate from the daily rat race.
17. They exercise regularly
Physical exertion causes our body to produce endorphin — a chemical that makes us feel happy. By setting off special chemical reactions in our brain, exercises help to alleviate the symptoms of many psychological conditions, including depression, anxiety, and melancholy. What’s more, they give us the opportunity to appreciate our bodies, which is an important part of a positive mindset. Interestingly enough, even in cases when exercise fails to help us lose weight or gain impressive musculature, we still end up with more reasons to feel good about ourselves!
18. They go for walks
Nature is fuel for the soul. Even a 20-minute stroll in the fresh air can do a lot of good for your health. Whenever we feel sluggish, we pour ourselves a cup of coffee. However, we can do much better by simply going out for a walk and letting Mother Nature recharge our batteries!
19. They lounge in bed
Getting up on the wrong side of the bed is not just an expression. Awaking during the right sleep period is crucial for ensuring your well-being throughout the day. Medics advise against jumping out of bed/rushing off to begin your morning chores. It’s better to get up gradually, allowing yourself time to curl up and stretch out between the cozy bedsheets. And, naturally, make sure that you get enough sleep during the night!
20. They laugh a lot
You’ve heard it a hundred times: laughter is the best medicine. Laughing triggers the production of the hormones in the brain that make us feel happier and reduce sensitivity to pain and stress. And, by the way, it is advisable to laugh on a regular basis! It is believed that the brain responds to frequent laughter in the same way as the rest of the body does to regular exercise.
21. They walk with great strides
This is not a metaphor. Happy people walk in a free, nonchalant manner, making wider steps. By adopting such a type of walking, we trigger a certain chain reaction in our brains. This might sound paradoxical, but the freer your walk is, the happier you are. Still don’t believe us? Then try walking a few meters in small, shuffling steps, keeping your eyes on the ground. Now, did walking in this manner make you feel good? We bet it didn’t!
Source: Brightside.me
Preview photo credit (c) depositphotos Based on materials from Huffington Post
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Scientists have finally explained how cats prolong our lives
Cats cure us
Cat purring facilitates the healing of wounds. Scientists are still arguing about the origins of the sound, but we all know that cats do purr. And that somehow benefits the human capabilities for healing.
Cats purr in a special therapeutic vibration range
An average cat purrs at a frequency from 25 to 150 Hz. This is just the frequency to help best restore cat muscles and bones, but these purr waves are really good for people as well. They are exactly in the range that is therapeutic according to medics, and numerous studies have been dedicated to this phenomenon. Thus, the purring of a cat can heal fractures, restore damaged muscles, and even get rid of wheezing.
Cats reduce the amounts of stress in your life
Studies show that, on average, cat owners are less prone to stress. Dog lovers are in second place, while the most stressed are people without pets.
Cats may reduce the probability of heart attacks by 40%
Scientists from the University of Minnesota have found out that the presence of a cat in your house may be beneficial for your heart. In their research, they discovered that people who don’t own a cat are 40% more prone to heart attacks.
Why so? Here’s what they say: ’The most reasonable explanation for this may be that cats can relieve stress and anxiety, thus reducing the risk of cardiovascular diseases.’
Let’s be careful with facts, though. Yes, studies have shown that cats can alleviate stress, reduce the risks of cardiovascular diseases, and even potentially offer some purr-therapy. However, all these say more about the way of life of an average cat owner, not the mystic power of cats over our bodies. But...who knows?
Source: Brightside.me
Based on materials from upworthy.com
Cat’s Photo Credit: Khizran Mustafa WAzir
10 tricks to keep your things looking brand new
An itchy sweater, stains on your new shoes, a broken zip — you’re never going to encounter any of these irritating little problems again. Because as it turns out, there are plenty of simple little tricks you can use to avoid them. And we’re going to share them all just with you. (Source: Brightside)
1. Getting the perfect sweater
Stop your sweaters from shedding by sticking them in the freezer overnight. If you have a cashmere or wool sweater that won’t stop shedding, toss it in the freezer before each wear.
2. Stopping your clothes from smelling bad
Spray a small amount of vodka on your clothes to eliminate strong odours. If you don’t have time to wash a shirt before wearing it again but it has a strong, lingering smell, just spray on some vodka and let it dry. The alcohol will kill odor-causing bacteria.
3. Getting rid of foundation cream
Fix foundation stains with a little bit of shaving cream. If you take off your shirt and accidentally smudge your makeup on the collar, just wipe a dollop of shaving cream on the spot to pretreat it before tossing it in the wash.
4. Getting rid of lipstick stains
Use hairspray to remove a lipstick stain. Spray the fabric (make sure it’s not dry-clean only) with hairspray, and let it sit for a few minutes. Dab the stain, and then toss it in the washer.
5. Cleaning suede shoes
Clean stubborn dirt off suede shoes with a nail file. Just buff it right out.
6. Cleaning stains from leather boots
Scrub off water stains on leather boots with a soft toothbrush and vinegar. If your boots are ruined from water, snow, salt, or all of the above, dip a soft-bristled toothbrush in white vinegar and gently rub to remove the stain.
7. Maintaining patent leather shoes in perfect condition
Fix a scuff on a patent leather shoe with a cotton swab and some petroleum jelly.
8. Mending dull or scratched leather shoes
Mend dull or scratched leather shoes with moisturizer. If you don’t have shoe polish (Who does?), grab a towel and rub your shoes with a bit of lotion to bring them back to life.
9. Tightening up a button
Paint clear nail polish over a loose button thread to temporarily stop it from unraveling. No need to learn how to sew on a button just yet.
10. Maintaining your sunglasses
Tighten your sunglasses with a dab of clear nail polish. If the arm of your sunglasses is a bit loose and you don’t have a tiny screwdriver handy, paint a small bit of polish over the hinge to temporarily tighten it.
Source: Brightside.me