Hump Day Happy Hour

A podcast about sex, food, and the (sometimes messy) intersection of the two. Tune in every other-ish Wednesday.

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In this episode we bare all-- about going to a strip club together. We discuss etiquette when receiving a lap dance, spinning stripper poles, and how the whole experience was almost like participating in a less-weird, more expensive threesome. Also, we get into our love for champagne as the festive, pre-game bevy.

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In this episode we examine whether wearing socks during sex can help in achieving an orgasm. This is SCIENCE we’re talking about here, folks. Also, why a sock fetish is probably the most convenient fetish ever. In the kitchen, we try lovin’ some liver (chicken and beef), but our hearts and our stomachs are not really in it.

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In this episode we discuss whether it’s weird or erotic to make eye contact during sex, men who can’t orgasm, and other life mysteries. In the kitchen you can find us drooling over coconut lamb curry (among other things).

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Happy 1-year, Hump Day Happy Hour! In this episode we celebrate the podcast’s anniversary by welcoming Mel Newman, our first ever guest on the show, to talk about threesomes, fantasies, and fetishes. And tonight in the kitchen, it’s a gas! We’re carbonating our own water as an exercise in soda/relationship building. Thanks for listening, guys. We love you.   

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We're taking questions from our lovely listeners again this episode because, well, we just adore you! One listener wants guidance about whether it's okay to get it on while dogs or sleeping children are in the room; another listener wonders how to have sex in public without getting arrested. In the kitchen, we prepare a meal that you can take out for a mid-day picnic and hump session.

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WHAT'S COOKIN' GOOD LOOKIN' Anti-UTI cranberry horseradish sauce (featured on episode 17)

One of our dear listeners asked if any foods can help help treat UTIs, and we felt this was an issue we could tackle in the kitchen. No one likes a UTI, but everyone likes cranberry sauce with a spicy twist, am i right?

This sauce is packed with top UTI-fighting, bacteria-bashing agents: cranberries, horseradish, and cinnamon. Serve it over pork chops (we grilled ours on the stove over medium heat for about 10), or whatever meat/ vegetarian option you prefer. No matter what, your urinary tract and your taste buds will thank you.

1 can non-gelatinous, no sugar added cranberry sauce 2 TBS apple cider vinegar 1 tsp cinnamon 2 TBS horseradish

You guys, this is so easy. Pour all the ingredients into a sauce pan and simmer for about 20-30 minutes. Eat. Hump. (And don't forget to pee afterwards!)

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Big news: we love you all so much that we’ve decided to open up our monogamous podcast relationship to our listeners. In this episode, we field a question from a woman who wants to incorporate dirty talk in the bedroom, but can’t seem to do it without giggling. Another listener wonders which foods can be used to treat UTIs. And tonight in the kitchen, nothing's burning; our meal is full of ingredients to keep your urinary tract healthy.

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WHAT'S COOKIN' GOOD LOOKIN' Smoked salmon cream cheese wontons (Featured on Episode 16)

1 package of cream cheese 1 package of smoked salmon ½ cup green onions wonton wrappers 1 egg, beaten

1. For the wonton filling: Cut (chop?) salmon into small pieces. Dice green onions. Mix all together with cream cheese.

2. Spread a small amount of egg along perimeter of wonton wrapper. This will help seal it closed.

3. Place about 1 tsp. of filling onto center of wrapper. Fold over so that makes a triangle shape. Use a fork to press down along the edges.

4. Fry in olive oil until lightly browned and crispy. Or you can bake ‘em at 400 for about 10 minutes.

5. Serve with a spicy mustard sauce, soy sauce, sweet and sour, or whatever kind of condiments you fancy. We also served the wontons with sauteed kale and diced avocado, because why they hell not.

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Yoga pants: some people love ‘em, and some people want to make them illegal. In this episode, we discuss this controversial clothing item’s origin, why they’re so damn fine (and comfortable), and the future of the “athleisure” movement. In the kitchen, we put on our yoga pants and chef hats to whip up some very camel toe-esque cream cheese wontons. Namaste, hotties!

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Pubes or no pubes (or a few pubes!), that is the question. In this episode we discuss grooming trends, the male brazilian wax, and positive genital self-image. Learn about some bizarre hair removal techniques and, on the other end of the spectrum, pubic hair transplants. And in the kitchen we’re cooking up sesame salmon topped with alfalfa sprouts. (Yeahhhhhh, the sprouts are pubey-looking and we know it).

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Garlic Ginger Chicken & Pineapple Stir-Fry (featured on episode 14)

Yes, unfortunately it's flu season. So blow your nose (and whatever else you feel like blowing), and get your hot ass into the kitchen to make this easy and health-boosting meal. Your respiratory and reproductive systems will thank you.

2 chicken breasts

1.5 cups diced pineapple

1 bushel of kale (peeled of stalk and shredded into medium pieces)

4-6 cloves ginger

4 Tbs. chopped ginger

About 2-4 cups fresh spinach as base

shredded parmesan for topping

salt & pepper to taste

soy sauce/ tamari/ Dr. Bragg's/ coconut aminos/ salty fluid of your choice

1.  You guys, this is the easiest recipe ever. Chop up the chicken into 1-inch pieces and cook in frying pan/ wok. Then throw everything else in with it, including salty sauce of your choice. Serve over a bed of spinach (get those greens in wherever you can!) and top with shredded parmesan. 

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Baby, it’s cold outside, but that doesn’t mean things can’t still get hot in the bedroom. In this episode we talk about keeping it sexy during flu season. Learn whether or not your dick can catch a cold from oral sex (it can’t), how wearing a surgical mask in bed can be hot, and why humping regularly can keep you from feeling sick. Then, we serve up some garlic chicken, ginger, pineapple stir-fry to really fire up your immune system...and your loins.

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It's the most wonderful time of year! Here's a quick and dirty guide to making the most of it: from gifts, to New Year's resolutions, to surreptitious sex at your parents' house. Happy, hump-filled holidays!

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WHAT'S COOKIN' GOOD LOOKIN Spread 'Em Stuffed Peppers (Featured on Episode 12) This delectable dish may soon be your new favorite. Spread 'em open, bake 'em, devour 'em.  6-8 bell peppers (red, orange, yellow) 1 lb ground chicken 1 lb. ground spicy sausage Approx. 4 oz goat cheese Approx 4 oz. cream cheese Spinach leaves 3-4 diced roma tomatoes Pesto for topping: 2 cups basil leaves  ½ cup spinach  juice from 1 lemon  3 Tbs olive oil 2 Tbs garlic salt and pepper to taste 1/3 cup walnuts 1. Turn up the heat, baby. Pre-heat oven to 375. 2. Mix together goat cheese and cream cheese in a bow. Cut peppers in half and de-seed. Spread a thin layer of the cheese mixture on the inside of both halves of the peppers. 3. Add a layer of spinach leaves on top of cheese. Because you know greens are sexy! 4. Saute the meat in pan until browned. (Originally we cooked the chicken and sausage separately and prepared 2 different types of peppers, but we've lived, we've learned, and we totally reccommend mixing the meats together.) Add a scoop-ish of cooked meat inside each pepper. 5. Bake for about 45 minutes. But keep an eye on the peppers and make sure you don't overcook those babies. 6. Serve with pesto and diced tomatoes on top. For the pesto: Grab your food processor, immersion blender, or wolverine-like claws and blend up the olive oil, walnuts, lemon, and garlic until it’s a smooth consistency. Then add in the basil, spinach, salt and pepper. Mix it real good. Add some olive oil for taste/consistency if you feel like it.

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How often "should" you be having sex when you're in a relationship? In this episode, we compare humping frequency stats across different age groups, countries, religions, and lifestyles in an attempt to determine that magic number. For dinner, we indulge in the Spread 'Em Stuffed Peppers.

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We review some of the more common sexual fetishes (several related to feet, for all those kinky podiatrists out there), and attempt to make sense of and pronounce the less common ones (say 'symphorophilia' ten times fast). Tonight in the kitchen we experiment with food fetishism.

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WHAT'S COOKIN' GOOD LOOKIN' Sensual Seafood Bake: An aquatic-inspired dish, because darlin' it's better down where it's wetter. 1 lb shrimp 1 lb scallops 2 tilapia filets 1 bushel of fresh dill 2-3 lemons 2 cups white wine 1/4 c coconut oil salt, pepper, garlic powder to taste 2 c chopped broccoli  2 c diced red (or purple) potatoes This meal isn't rocket science. Grab your nearest casserole dish and load it up with the fish, potatoes, and broccoli. In a separate bowl, mix the sauce stuff (wine, coconut oil, lemon juice, seasonings). Honestly, we're a little iffy on the measurements for those sauce ingredients, so just DO WHAT FEELS GOOD TO YOU. It's all about experimenting. Pop it in the oven and cook at 350 for about an hour, hour thirty. Check how things are going at the half way point, and if the sauce still needs some time to soak into everything, put the pan back in the oven. Then, go hump it up on Hump Day while you wait.