realizing versus recognizing
the difference between bitty’s and jack’s oh moments
bitty’s oh moment is dramatic, built-up, like time is slowing down, like he suddenly can’t breathe because the air’s getting caught in his throat. like it isn’t just an oh but an oh—oh, oh no—no no no. it’s not that he doesn’t want it, it’s that he doesn’t want it with jack, his believed-to-be straight best friend. arguably, it’s like he’s seeing the feelings come to life and imagining them ruining one of the closest friendships he’s ever had all at the same time, likely a byproduct of his internalized homophobia in which he won’t even allow himself the opportunity before he shoots it down.
and, interestingly, ngozi draws this entire moment out with warm lighting, soft tones, fading dialogue, gentle panning. while this is definitely done so to enlarge the impact of the moment, i think it’s also a way for her to tell us that this—this is bitty’s first ever oh. this is his first ever love. this is his first time ever experiencing that heart-stopping sensation of noticing you’re falling for someone, that you’ve already been falling without even—
this isn’t just just an oh, this is a realization. bitty’s realizing he’s fallen, realizing it for the first time, and he doesn’t know what to do about it. there’s no prior experience to lean back on, no shoulder he can turn to for help, no previous warnings that could’ve prepared him.
this moment is the moment bitty, for the first time, just knew.
jack’s is a single frame. a single, brief oh (even exemplified with the use of font).
where bitty’s is sudden and huge, jack’s is almost inconsequential, like he’s relaxing tense shoulders or letting out a held breath. it’s not so much of a build-up as it is a calming click into place, illustrating that jack has known, at some subconscious level, about his feelings for a considerable amount of time already. he’s known that his friendship with bitty has budded into something more. he’s known that he’s fallen, been falling and still falling. that he’s probably in love.
it’s no spectacle. it’s not eye-opening or dramatic. it’s just an …oh, a fog-clearing quiet accompanied only by a scattering of leaves and the soft tones of the wedding church bells.
of course, he couldn’t reach this point until the last possible moment. he needed the nudge from his dad, the finality of graduation, the pressure that this is it. it’s now or never. he needed the gnawing feeling of something left unfinished, something he needed to do to let his time at samwell come to a proper close.
but it’s not like it all culminated into some breathtaking realization. he already knew that there was something—it had been there all along.
he just finally recognized it.
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