MonsterSmoocher

Too educated to be the comic relief character of my life, but here I am Queer/26/He/Him/Grad Student

[sartred]

[oneheadtoanother]

[i-smooch-monsters]

I was just thinking about how they make deodorant for hunter so the animals downwind can’t smell you and how, to my rotted brain, THATS SCENTBLOCKERS BAYBEE. Anyways I was thinking about alphas and omegas using a whole line of products like that to mask their pheromones and how there would be shampoo, conditioner, body wash, lotion, maybe even laundry detergent, all designed to mask their smell.

So I was looking the deodorant up to see how it works YALL MOST OF THOSE PRODUCTS EXIST

The biggest thing missing here is a separate shampoo and conditioner (they only have a 2-in-1) but this is so funny and I’m tempted to put in the work to smell as little like a human as possible, just for the bit.

[xxcosmicaura]

remember kids

Artist 🎨: @vhsdogs

[dawningwinds-s]

Honestly one of the main reasons to assume Luigi Mangione was framed by the NYPD is that the UHC shooter not only had no reason to carry around a manifesto, he had no reason to even write a manifesto. He said his piece loud and clear with the bullet casings and the monopoly money. Everyone understood it and the shooter knew that would be the case.

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

I mean the main reason to assume this is that the NYPD are worthless dipshits who never do any fucking work they just parasitically sponge off of the wasted money of American taxpayers like a tape worm

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i should wake up and automatically be restored to full health, that's how sleeping should work, what is this horseshit

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

*waking up with a sore neck* where are my goddamn spell slots

[pieklo]

Reblog daily for health and prosperity

[sexhaver]

musk is going to die in a Tesla explosion in 6 months after sticking his nose where it doesn't belong and we will never get a conclusive answer on whether it was a CIA car bomb or just a normal Tesla malfunction

[fernthefanciful]

Like to charge, reblog to cast

[were--ralph]

official elon musk hate post reblog to hate like to hate reply to hate

[8bit-mau5]

[citricsinger76-deactivated20250]

image description: an anime woman with long dark hair in a ponytail. She has a speech bubble reading "I do not love my country. I love the people in it an want their needs met." End description

[i-smooch-monsters]

Hey I accidentally threw your boyfriend into the wash with my reds. Yeah, he’s fine but he is pink now. Sorry.

[i-smooch-monsters]

I was really hoping the whole thing of Sam saying Imahara Joe wanted to fuck FCG would lead to some fics, but I haven’t seen any.

[i-smooch-monsters]

Taliesin is looking so fine tonight

[sapph0sfriend]

exandria unlimited: calamity as reductress headlines

[i-smooch-monsters]

Wait is Bolo a mail order bride?

[i-smooch-monsters]

Septarion, Octothurge….. Nonagon?

[cabriolet-and-curricle]

I hope “Ashton is 6 feet tall” becomes C3’s “Molly doesn’t have pierced nipples.” The kind of thing where Critters look at Taliesin, pat him gently on the cheek, and go: