Kxiper

he/they - InkTober blog: @Sknow-And-Ink don't ever be afraid to message me, making friends is cool I heard–I don't know, I've never been to this planet https://iamkuiper.carrd.co/

[iamkxiper]

Singularity EP (2023)

In 2023, I did a music challenge I came up with based on InkTober to spur me into making more. I did 15 songs over the course of the month,

[plufy-kodfich]

It was cool, it was cool starring me as the debil and @iamkxiper as the angle (yes that is him)

Welcome to today's ramble. If you regret clicking on the pandora's box that was the "keep reading" button, there's still a chance for you to turn back now. This will happen a lot because I am annoying, but hopefully you are one of the few that can bear it. Today we'll be talking about things I learnt for the purpose of making this drawing. I want to start off by saying I'm not a religious person so forgive me if I'm getting anything wrong. Also take everything I say with a grain of salt. I'm curious, not credible. Do your own research if any of this truly interests you. First and foremost, y'know those memes that are like "how angels are portrayed vs biblically accurate angels." Well I found out that, although these memes aren't wrong, they are very misguided assuming the freakish rings of fire covered in eyes is the only accurate angel. This is absolutely not true. Angels have a hierarchy spanning across the more human like to the "you have every right to be afraid" abstract behemoths. So the cutesy little human with a white robe, white wings, and halo is just as biblically accurate as the rings of fire covered in eyes. That one, by the way, is called a "throne." It is the third highest ranking of the angel hierarchy. And, no, they would not come down to bring you a message and say "be not afraid." That's what the more friendly human looking messenger angels are there for. God is not going to sick the incomprehensible eyeball monsters to tell you something. Also the massive, spinning, flaming wheels part I imagine weren't designed to be around people, or anything corporeal for that matter. Their purpose is to be the chariots of God and chant how awesome he is. It's probably more complex than that but that seems to be the gist. In other news, I found out that the devil is not actually the ruler of hell, according to the good book. He is tormented alongside everyone else in the lake of fire. The whole idea of him being the ruler is believed to have stemmed from the works of Dante Alighieri's "The Divine Comedy," John Milton's "Paradise Lost," and other works of art depicting the underworld and the ultimate sinner of many names. --------- Okay, now talking about the actual drawing you came here for. With all that said, I went with a very inaccurate depiction of an angel, at least concerning the head. It's a weird hybrid of a throne, a seraphim, and your-run-of-the-mill angel. I did this cuz 1. its cool and 2. I had the rough idea of how to translate Kuiper into an angel from the get-go. How bout I just show you a bunch of the process. Here, take it.

I do all this for the desire of transparency, showing the awkward journey instead of just the finished product. It's also to somewhat ease my anxious mind, knowing I've shown some proof I'm a human being. That is just the state of the internet right now, I guess Would you believ me if I told yu this all was inspdired by a screenshot me and Kuiper took in orur tomodaci lfe game. Nesxt post will be simpler, I swear

[iamkxiper]

I am in fact angular, if you didn't know

[plufy-kodfich]

This freakignt t ing is frekaing getting tehir boogers everywher help

stupid doodle of this asshole that I will obliterate -> @iamkxiper

[iamkxiper]

[plufy-kodfich]

Getting so far, yet so far getting nowhere

Out of frustration at my lack of initiative to do something, I did something. That which was drawing a timeline of my sona's design. You can really see the they/them/it pronouns slowly bare its teeth over time. And too the exestential dread of time slipping through my fingers, not slowing down no matter how much I try to alter course. Ya, sounds about right. I wanna say more, but the artwork alone's already got you readin an essay about some rando you've never heard of. So I'll leave it here. Uhhhh hey, Tumblr. You seem pretty cool, we should go out for a coffee and get to know each other better some time. Ok, seeya

P.S. as a bonus since I'm SO generous, you can have the og drawings from each era I used as reference. This is now a three year spanning art dump I guess.

[iamkxiper]

[iamkxiper]

Everything led to this moment.

This took an hour and a half to render and my laptop wanted to explode from all the effects and keyframes I used, not to mention the preview window was so laggy the whole time I basically had to guess what everything would look like until it was actually rendered, but worth. Had a lot of fun editing this! And also drawing this. Wasn't supposed to turn into an edit, was just a drawing, but I was extra inspired so!

Original drawing(s) before the edit:

The song inspired the art, I think I listened to it like 100 times in less than a week or something stupid like that. I was drawing this before I even really comprehended what exactly the meaning of the song was, but knowing now I do think it is a very fitting song for these two. Maybe not in the typical sense, but definitely in a way.

I could just so perfectly see this story play out in my head to every beat of this song.

[iamkxiper]

Every form, every line and shape and movement, all like a twisted funhouse mirror. Everyone is unique, everyone but you that is.

Who even are you?

[iamkxiper]

Attack for patapsco!

[iamkxiper]

Attack for luckyworm_ on Art Fight!

[iamkxiper]

Toenail The Cat (my beloved) for Poloniium on Art Fight!

[iamkxiper]

First Art Fight attack on mechinodermata! I had a lotta fun with this one :)

[iamkxiper]

Again and again, it goes. Round and round, repeat after repeat. Slot the disk back into the tray, and take it back out. Blow the dust off the surface, use your t-shirt to desperately wipe at the scratches sitting over the spot that holds your favorite memories. Everything has been irreversibly changed. The disk inevitably breaks, becomes glittering dust beyond recognition.

Until it doesn't.

[iamkxiper]

A slow build, adding and layering and growing, thing after thing, all culminating in a sudden silence. A gentle quiet.

You watch as you enter back into the universe and start the cycle all over again. Hell, you open the door for it.

[iamkxiper]

The once bright and vibrant world turns dim, and every shadow, every leaf flitters out in your peripheral in hopes of capturing just a glimpse of your attention. And they do.

[iamkxiper]

"All the plants on board have died. Or at least, they have stopped being able to grow. It's like they're frozen in time, left to be nothing but a husk that once held life.

I took a sample of one to look at under a microscope, and it just doesn't make any sense. They're not dead, but I really can't say they're alive either. It's purgatory on a molecular level."

[iamkxiper]

You take the hand. For the first time, or maybe the second, but you take it all the same.

Something twists within your very being. The grief, the anger, despair. And, just maybe... a twinge of hope.

Breathe a touch of life back into the dead.

[iamkxiper]

And suddenly you are alone. Isolated from yourself and your peers, you become small. A lone fleck of cosmic dust adrift in a silent wind.

No one understands you. No one gets that this is all it was ever going to be, that there's no happy endings.

In the ultimate pursuit of loneliness, of alienation, of your objective truth, you become the only thing left in existence. The living are dead to you. And because they are already dead, you can kill.

Kill every memory, every experience, past future and current, every scrap of evidence that they ever existed, and then them. Consume your whole world in a whirlwind of chaos and grief.

You will be no small supernova.

And yet, despite this, a hand still peers out hesitantly from the dark.

[iamkxiper]

A vast cosmic ocean spawls an endless abyss, one that harbors both everything and nothing. Your every desire and action and inaction lies here, pumping through the veins of our universe.