Asdfghjkl Idk

Hi! I really like food, books, and writing. That's kinda it. I'm way too lazy to type more, so yeah that's it ok bye sorry for being awkward

[yesterdaysprint]

Life magazine, July 1923

[sunsetbabe]

New Year’s Day // The Archer

[ponycamp]

[snoopingasusualisee]

[wembleyfragglesarchive]

im washing me and my clothes bitch

[wembleyfragglesarchive]

[unsaltedpeanutbutter]

She drunk as fuck

[kurapiki]

In this world it’s yeet or be yeeted

[firebirdscratches]

yeeten?

[thisiswhymomworries]

YOOT

[doctorbeth]

Pooh Bear

I see many Winnie the Poohs at the hospital (aka Winnie aka Pooh aka Pooh Bear), as you may guess.  Many look like this, a bit flat and with small wounds, designed to have a removable shirt:

They come for spas:

New hearts and stuffing:

And plumping up so they have a proper belly again:

Sometimes they look like this:

A bit more loved… or as his person said, in more “desperate condition”.

He also had a spa (not everyone does):

As you may’ve noticed, he needed a new nose and there were several options:

His heart had a pooh on it as well as some magic from a heffalump:

And after a bit of arm and smile surgery, soon he was healthy and ready to fly home:

His person wrote “He looks wonderful!”

The final Pooh I’m going to show you today just flew home yesterday.  He is always called Pooh Bear.  He is 14 years old and showed every year of hugs.  

Here are the photos his person’s mom sent for diagnosis:

As you can see, Pooh Bear was a bit flat and a bit gray.  He came in for a spa:

Got new stuffing and a magical Heffalump heart to preserve a bit of his original stuffing:

And finally was clean and plump and fluffy and ready to fly home:

He could even sit on his own!  His people said his chubbiness was perfect and as I said, he flew home yesterday!

[theawesomeadventurer]

this blog is singlehandedly curing my depression

[jasonpriestley]

The Scooby-Doo Project (1999)

[acreaturecalledgreed]

fun fact this special scared so many kids so fucking badly (b/c the blair witch aspect was played weirdly straight) that CN never aired it again 

[hz-archive]

you’re telling me this is real and not a shitpost

[preciousbeaan]

I seriously thought this shit was fake until I looked it up

[wildlifewednesdays]

A porcupine’s Halloween present (+ original sound effects)

[docwithtardisfez]

I had no idea giant porcupines made fucking precious sounds

[11213372-deactivated20160412]

[nightonblogmountain]

THAT’S THE SOUND IT MAKES!?!?!?

UN-BE-FUCKING-LIEVABLE 

[why-animals-do-the-thing]

We got asked if this is cute and okay. I can very happily say yes, this is stupid cute and those are happy porcupine noises. 

One of my favorite things about doing zoo work was all the noises you never realize the animals make when they’re excited or interested in a new thing. Coatimundis squeak and snuffle, and giant porcupines make that sound. 

[typhoidmeri]

Omgggg the sounds.

[gigi-tastic]

Teddy is back on my dash and all is right with the world

[bears-official]

WE ALMOST TO OCTOBRE POST OF PUNKINBEARS

[larkstonguesinaspicpart1]

I looked further into johnny johnny yes papa

They’e created by a channel called “BillionSurpriseToys”. They have an official twitter

3 things: 1) They have their location set as the UAE, so we know what country these are coming from

2) They joined in October 2015, which means they’ve been around for a while, even before the “elsagate” thing was big 

3) they have a website 

When I loaded up the website, google immediately let me know that the connection was not secure 

and….. my adblock blocked 84 popups/ads 

what the hell. so there’s obviously something fishy with this page 

they have a shop….. okay 

where you can buy… “merchandize”…. which is six of the identical t-shirt

They also have an about page… filled with… more grammatical/spelling errors

“technology dominates ou kids’ lives” 

“inculate”?????? 

They also have a blog…. with generic parenting-related topics

most of these articles are posted multiple times with different titles 

These posts seem suspiciously too competent for the usual phrasing on this website, and are from the pespective of parents. careful googling reveals that they’re actually from a mommy blog, here , whose content was just wholesale stolen. 

…..okay 

on another note, they have a character page with… this guy 

…… i hate it 

anyways, at the bottom of the page, there’s a link to the hosting company they use. 

This redirects to what looks like a normal webhosting/media management company... but after reading it…. it has the same text as the billion surpise toys company. its some kind of shell. 

I looked up the company…

They’re a 3d animation company in India pretending to be a media/web hosting company for a youtube channel based in the UAE? ?? what is happening??? also btw they’re hiring!

This website also has a privacy policy page

An note. 

The website also has the same layout as the first website… but with a buuunch of broken links. 

….except for these, which all link to the main website instead of their profile. okay 

In conclusion: What the fuck ? 

[xenoqueer]

So, I’ve been dealing with these videos for years now at work, and the simple answer is that they’re ad revenue generators.

Make enough of them that are similar enough and pass kid-safe standards (which they all do because they’re brightly colored and nonviolent, two of the major standards), and you can get the YouTube autoplay algorithm to put your videos on basically infinitely, until someone actually changes the channel. The next recommended video, based on content and audience similarity, will just be another one of your “lullaby educational kids song 3 hours” monstrosities, indefinitely.

A kid, babysitter, or exhausted parent clicks on one of them. It plays. Ads appear every 7 minutes (the maximum amount before additional screening for spam kicks in). The kid wanders off without turning off the console or computer, just the screen. Now you get ad revenue every 7 minutes until that machine turns off or gets used again, probably overnight or maybe even a full day, because every next autoplay is another of your videos. And every video that plays further locks in the autoplay.

Channels set up these nested shell companies so their channel can become verified as an official business channel, which automatically reduces the amount of screening you undergo, too.

They tend to be based in India because there’s a sufficiently skilled talent base and resource base to produce the hundreds of hours of just distinct enough visuals. In many cases, titles are generated algorithmically based on what pulled the most revenue the week before and to search terms for the last few days. Videos are then created to match the algorithmic titles, hence the bizarre combinations of topics.

This helps get these videos to the top of search results for popular kids searches, increasing the chance that the infinite recommendation loop gets started by the largest possible number of people.

I admit, if you haven’t been wading through this shitshow professionally for a few years, it probably looks pretty creepy.

But it’s not a cult or a conspiracy.

It’s just capitalism.

[scholasticbabe]

“More fuck yeah, less fuck that.”

— unknown ( via @scholasticbabe )

[franksars]

Wow. I’ve never thought about this before.

[scholasticbabe]

“When you reach the end of your rope, just tie a knot and hang on.”

— franklin D Roosevelt ( via @scholasticbabe )

[prideprejudce]

she weaponized her gag gift im crying

[batmanisagatewaydrug-deactivate]

My aunt used to write horoscopes for the newspaper as a part time job. She had a friend in college who a)always read that newspapers horoscope and b)didn't know my aunt wrote it. So whenever the friend had a shitty episode my aunt would make her horoscope as positive as possible to cheer her up. Long story short they recently got married and are both my aunts now.

what do mean “long story short” give me this entire sappy gay romance novel right now 

[svedone]

“bro”

“what bro”

“tell the whole world that we’re bros”

*whispers* “we’re bros”

“why’d you whisper bro?”

“because you’re my whole world bro”

“b r o”

[silverhawk]

u ever just see an animal n ur like “yeah thats perfectly named” bc

this is the violet-crowned woodnymph n like. yeah thats right

[silverhawk]

yeah this is Just Right.

[differenttypesofpeople]

Types of people: Art meduims

Oil paint: Bit of a traditionalist. Born in the wrong era. Formal clothes. Very patient. Constantly changing their minds. Lingering touches. Sometimes a bit full of themselves but tries not to be.

Acrylic paint: Not very patient. Aims for things that seems unachievable. Always striving to be more. Bold moves. Colourful clothing. Not one to follow the rules. Never tired.

Charcoal: Does before they think. Bold. Dirty hands. Big smiles. Too much coffee. Not afraid to speak up. Not easy to make friends with but a very loyal friend.

Watercolour: Dancing in the rain. Old movies. Content with what they have. Seems younger than they are. Spinning until they’re dizzy. Soft laughter. Cold feet.

Colour pencil: Notices a lot of detail. Colourful clothing. Can’t finish anything. Spends a lot of time and energy on things they love. Carnivals. Wants to please. Hard working.

Pen: Lives in extremes. Well mannered. Wicked smiles. Never sleeps. Popular. Knows too much for their own good. Involved in a lot of things. Overworks themselves.

Pencil: Focuses on detail. Knowing smiles. Always on the edge of a breakdown. Always busy. Constantly busy with something new. Sticks to old habits.The go-to-friend.

Pastels: Soft touches. Careful smiles. Only has a few close friends. Cotton candy. Insecure. Love at first sight. Easy to confide in. Bit messy sometimes. Loose clothing.