no

halle | 18 | they/them no clue what i'm doing with my life, no clue what i'm doing with my blog

[camilicy]

He’s on an adventure 🌧️🐱

[play-now-my-lord]

GORDON RAMSAY: Alright, mate. I’ll forgive the cockup with the soup course, but I want that caprese salad, and if there’s any more forbidden knowledge of the future in it I’m going to need words with the chef de cuisine ME: Absolutely, chef. We have your caprese salad coming out now *additional member of waitstaff brings out a dish on one hand, and lifts the cloche to reveal basil leaves, fresh mozzarella, and slices of San Marzano tomato artfully arranged to spell out “MARCH 15, 2048 - AUTO ACCIDENT”* GORDON RAMSAY: Hold on a moment. Is that when and how I die? ME: I don’t know, chef. It seems at odds with the concept of free will that knowing such a thing would even be possible GORDON RAMSAY: Not even through the antipasti and I’m already being asked to subscribe to a non-deterministic universe. Fuck me

[bugeys]

⚪️Man ⚪️Woman 🔘Oh You Know

[corrie-zodori]

Anyone: Hey (asks about a special interest of mine)? Me: Becomes an unskippable cutscene

[depsidase]

[dogencool]

If I’m gonna have to see and then report over a dozen porn bots every day can they at least give me like a daily grinding quest for it like it’s an MMO. Can I get some gold and a mediocre loot drop

[mivolasvivi]

I love r/autism

[tommyswiseau]

[zombiegoblin-deactivated2023061]

me to my brain

[gertritude-art]

nightly spiral

[sigynpenniman]

this is my favorite fuckin comic ever I have never seen something capture the experience so well

[afterword]

hey dude im on Loves You island and all of your friends are here too. what time are u planning on getting here? we are gonna order pizza

[afterword]

this is exactly the way i meant it :) the sooner u love urself the sooner we can all play mario kart btw. but its ok if u take a while. we are not going anywhere

[klaw]

the year is 2023, marie kondo holds j*ff b*zos by the skin on the back of his neck in front of a public gathering

“does this one spark joy?” she shouts at the restless audience, they boo in response

she snaps his spine like .5mm mechanical pencil lead and throws his lifeless corpse to the crowd, they cheer in response

[mewsicalmiss]

Please tell me this is our timeline

[muzzlemouths]

Angular roughshark, along Europe and Africas west Atlantic coast from Norway to South Africa and even Mediterranean.

THERE IS SO MUCH SHAPE TO THESE GUYS

[kushblazer666]

[thememedaddy]

[kristina100000]

really need someone to slonk my shit rn stupid style

[mathew]

[petermorwood]

Not so sure about the preceding gymnastics, but an excellent dismount.

[dduane]

Hey, they stuck it. The Czech judge will mark them low, but what can you do….

[radiofreederry]