Allt

Archive This is how I rock

[thickness-protection-program]

Stop warning me about mature content I'm literally an adult

[nealashitposts]

A year or so ago I went to wood carving club with a bruised eye from my dog slamming his nose into my eyesocket and like every old lady there pulled me aside at some point to ask if my partner hit me here are some of the solutions they had in case he did.

-Replacing his vitimens with poision

- getting her brother to invite him out onto his boat and then killing him and dumping him in the ocean and saying he got drunk and fell off.

- get tboned with him in the passenger seat and then once he was in the hospital theres all kinds of easy ways to kill him like not washing my hands after a poop and then touching his wound casually.

-replacing his drink of choice with moonshine!?

- take him on a hike thats locally notorious for a rapid otter attacking hikers and once he had rabies I could just kill him any ol way and say self defense.

-One lady just cheerfully informed me she had a gun and only a few years left anyway

[janedrewfinally]

Accurate tags:

#and this is why no-fault divorce brings down the murder rate

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

they killed him for this

[helenvaughans]

[zitasaurusrex]

[behonkiss-deactivated20191001]

When personal squabbles take priority over saving the world

[animusrox]

[crochethub]

Flower wreath by NightOwl874

[pleatedjeans]

99 Funny And Absurd Pictures That Have No Explanation And Don’t Need One

[thecrumbez]

Happy Pride Month to those two women dancing together in the foreground of the boat scene in Godzilla (1954).

I’m sorry your romantic foibles were overshadowed by a big ass atomic lizard thing.

[erratic-dragon-fruit]

out of the tags with you

[anarchistmemedistro]

AI haters build tarpits to trap and trick AI scrapers that ignore robots.txt

Attackers explain how an anti-spam defense became an AI weapon.

[megaceros]

love that energy

[beggars-opera]

*Looking at a gay couple* so which one of you is Colin Mochrie and which one is Ryan Styles

[cam1lla]

*looking at a gay couple* so which one of you is Laura Hall on piano and Linda Taylor on guitar

[homunculus-argument]

I like that the library can send me automated text message reminders that my stuff is due, but I wish they also had an option to personalise the messages. I would like to make them more personal. Specifically passive-aggressive, with progressively less on the "passive" as the date approaches. Like three days before they're due it's like "hey I just wanted to remind you that you still have my stuff, in case you've forgotten that you were supposed to return them. No pressure though! You have three days :)"

Then a day before the date there's another text like "hey you still have my stuff, right? Yeah you have them, I'd know if you'd have returned them, I keep tabs on everything. Return them tomorrow. :)"

And on the day they're due it's just this picture

[surroundedbybooks]

This would be hilarious but most library patrons would hate it

The public librarian is amused

[homunculus-argument]

That's the neat part: being able to personalise them would let everyone choose exactly how they want it to be. I also don't think that most people would want the library to pester them with "yo give us our shit back" at any level.

[grimelords]

[catchymemes]

[only-cat-memes]

[bimmyjimmy]

i didnt know the flash was on

[crabussy]

captivated by his colours. how is he doing this

[the-big-mood]

[oldpaintings]

Two grey terracotta vases with carnations, c.1600 Florentine School