brief analysis on why zutara qualifies for hetslop under hetero-patriarchal theory
disclaimer but this isn't me saying people shouldn't ship Zutara or that you're a misogynist if u do. Shipping isn't activism. I'm just here to examine why people view the ship the way they do, especially relative to the other ship in the fandom it's incessantly compared to. Although if you are a zutara shipper, you probably won't enjoy this. anyway
Half the chemistry many shippers see in Zuko x Katara but don't see or refuse to see in Kataang is because Aang and Katara's romantic relationship is subversive of typical heterosexual romantic relationships in popular media:
Aang, the male, is younger and smaller than Katara
Katara is the more protective one in the relationship
Katara takes the lead in the relationship
When a male takes the lead in a relationship dynamic, when he gets things on track, when he wants to be taken seriously, and he’s the one who teaches his partner, he is seen as an ideal male - a born leader. When a woman does it, she is seen as “motherly”.
Women cannot be afforded the privilege of being seen as leaders, especially towards men - they can only be given labels defined by men under a hetero-patriarchal lens. Hence Katara cannot be the emotional lead, she cannot simply be a friend worried about Aang's safety - she is being a "mother".
Even outside of her relationship with Aang, in scenes where men would be recognized as leaders and inspirations, people still see her as motherly.
Zutara shippers don’t see any chemistry in the scenes where Katara is protective of Aang because she is the woman being protective of a man.
It doesn’t appeal to the traditional heterosexual dynamic of the man being the protector. That’s why they don’t see chemistry when Katara threatens to kill Zuko if he ever even entertains the idea of hurting Aang, even though "touch her and die" is an extremely popular heterosexual romance trope. That’s why people don’t see chemistry when it’s Katara who saves Aang, who carries his lifeless body out of Ba Sing Se and cradles him close her chest when he's between life and death, but they do see the chemistry when Zuko covers his teammates with his body, and they see it when Zuko takes lightning for Katara. Because he’s the man in that dynamic.
Zuko being older and taller than Katara is really less of an analysis of the story itself but more just a generally applicable observation across most media with heterosexual shipping cultures. It doesn’t appeal to the hetero-patriarchal power structures for the man to be shorter or smaller in stature than the woman, the same way it doesn’t appeal to the same power structure for a woman to be darker-skinned than the man.
All that said, I don't think shipping something inherently makes you more of a feminist. It's ironic because the sentiment that shipping Kataang makes you a misogynist also comes from Zutara shippers. Anyway, none of this is about that. This is about examining how the subconscious biases people have manifests in their attitudes towards the media they consume. If you're going to play into popular hetero-patriarchal romance tropes, at the very least you should be aware of them.
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