L O S T - S O U L

Allison Miller - 20

[cillianlewis-deactivated2016092]

Cillian practically ripped the box open in his fervour to take the medication Allison handed to him, loading the canister of medication in with a click before pressing the button, inhaling deeply as he felt the medication begin to take effect. He took another puff before he spoke, “oh man, that feels better. Thanks for that, don’t know what I’d have done without you.”

Once he’d taken another puff, he pulled himself up, throwing one leg over the side of the trolley to make his toes touch the floor, making sure he was balanced before bringing his other leg over. He hung onto the metal edge, the inhaler still clasped in his hand as he listened to her talk. “I’d like to think it wouldn’t have got to that stage, but it’s a possibility. Anyway, I’m fine now, so we don’t need to dwell on that.” He scuffed his toe against the floor, pondering on what she had said before replying, “I mean, it’s not a case of proving myself to you lot, it was more trying to see what I still had in me, y’know? I feel like being cooped up here somewhat lessens your fitness levels.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

A faint smile graced Allison’s features when he thanked her, and she ducked her head slightly to hide it. It really wasn’t much, what she had done for him, since she knew he - and anyone else - would’ve done the same thing. Alli looked back up at him as he spoke again, nodding to let him know that she understood exactly where he was coming from. “Yeah, I get that. Not that I was very fit before... But, somehow, I feel even lazier than I did,” she agreed. “Just...try not to let it get to that point again, yeah? Or maybe keep someone nearby just in case. Y’know, better safe than sorry.”

[walker--ollie-blog]

“– Believe me, that’s not true. Even if you’re carrying just a little, you’re still gonna wanna do that rather than scavenge, unless you’re willing to take the chance with those berries on being poisonous or edible.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

“Okay, fair point...” Allison trailed off as she pondered the comment. It still didn’t make ‘training’ sound any more appealing, but the logic in doing it -unfortunately - spoke to her. “We’re pretty secure in here though, aren’t we? Like...even if a group of other alive people came in, trying to bust down the door, we’d still be good, right?” 

[cecily-riaz]

“Agreed,” She nodded with a laugh, listening to the other’s theory in 100% genuine curiosity. “You have a really good point. Have you ever read The Hunger Games?” She asked. “I mean, I haven’t, but I watched the movies… You get my point. Anyway, they basically never mention anything besides North America… Which they called something else, but I can’t remember. But the whole time I was watching, I was like, ‘What are all the other continents doing? Just letting America annually kill a bunch of kids?’ And then I was like, ‘Actually, I’m not surprised’. Maybe our Hunger Games is this virus.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

The comparison to The Hunger Games made her chuckle softly. It was spot on, really. And, given that, from what they have seen of the virus, it isn’t airborne, it’s entirely plausible that the rest of the world is fine, or managed to contain any traces of it. The velocity in which it took over their homeland, Allison really couldn’t say that she would have been shocked to find out that it was anything other than the rest of the world - or even just their own government - trying to wipe them from the face of the Earth. “Well, at least they’re not making us kill one another purposefully. In that way, they’re at least that much more civilized than the government of Panem.”

[walker--ollie-blog]

“–Are you suggesting that we add load-bearing to the agenda of daily tasks?” He was joking. That was a joke. It mightn’t have been obvious but it was a joke.

[idiot-allison-blog]

Allison’s eyes widened at the thought. “Oh, good god, no,” she breathed out with an airy chuckle. “I’m willing to drop the bag and run, if I need to. I’d rather scavenge than waste my day away lugging a backpack around for practice.”

[cillianlewis-deactivated2016092]

Cillian chuckled as he thought back to snow days in the UK, “oh, when it snowed in my neck of the woods, it was quite the debacle you could say - it would be all over the news, even if we only got a little bit that would melt by the afternoon, all sorts of weather warnings and stuff. We’d get the day off school every time.”

Cillian had always enjoyed the snow, but he couldn’t help but laugh at her comment about it being the end of the world. “Yeah, our parents would hate it, especially if they had to get into work at there had been snow, they’d be fumin’. You’d have thought it was the end of the world the way they treated it.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

“Meanwhile, places like Boston and probably ninety percent of Canada are just laughing in all of our faces, looking at us like we’re complete losers for freaking out that much over snow,” she said, letting out a breath of a laugh. In hindsight, it was kind of ridiculous, given how much more prepared they could’ve been, had they just assumed there would be snow. However, it seemed, as every winter came by, it was as if the town had never even heard of snow before.

“It doesn’t help that people forget how to drive any time there is - god forbid - any sort of precipitation.”

[cecily-riaz]

“Girl, that’s not pessimism, it’s logic. My brother would be all over this shit if it was an essay topic,” She said matter-of-factly. “He’s really into, like, articles on class division and the government basically being kinda shitty. Plus he makes me read ‘em all. That’s why I’m so smart!” She smiled, before looking down at the ground. “Don’t worry, though. My lips are sealed.” That was a lie– theorizing with Wren was one of Cecily’s main hobbies, just before theorizing with everyone else. “Maybe.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

“Kinda shitty? The government can pretty much be summed up at a steaming pile of bull crap,” she said, a tad incredulously. It really only made sense that they decided to eradicate the U.S. Hell, would anyone have been surprised if they found out the rest of the world was fine and just decided to let them crash and burn? Probably not. “It’s okay, you can tell her. I could probably beat her in a fist fight anyway... Or, y’know, at the very least hide behind someone bigger than me.”

[johanna-spencer-blog]

“Then I guess it is a good thing it wasn’t a pick up line, isn’t it?” Johanna challenged back with amusement, greatly enjoying the sight of a blush creeping down the blonde’s neck. “I’ve never been any good at hitting on people, I guess I just have good luck finding partners. Well, that or those I’ve been with have very low standards.”

She wasn’t surprised by the next question, Allison seemed honestly curious without any real judgement, and it simply made Jo open up without second thoughts. What else was there to lose, anyways? “Nope, I only got freaky with two of my lovers, the other were too vanilla and scadalized to even considering it.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

“That’s what they all say when their lines fail,” Allison retorted, quickly finding her footing, so to speak, again, while losing the blush that seemed to linger just a moment too long. “Mm, yeah, probably the low standards thing,” she teased, leaning into Johanna slightly to playfully nudge her. Jo was good company. Their senses of humor matched well enough that Allison didn’t feel the need to filter herself too much around her, plus she had this laid back nature that made her forget all about the world outside of the walls of the building they had been stuck in.

Allison made a soft ‘ah’, nodding her head slightly. She knew exactly where she would’ve fallen on that scale, and it was kind of amusing to her. “Well, on one hand, if we were living an actual horror film, you will have died knowing you had kinky sex at least once... And, on the other hand, I get to live forever cause virgins never die.”

[cecily-riaz]

“Oh, okay! I’m, like, always bored, so that won’t be a problem,” She chuckled, beginning to walk alongside the other. It was actually nice walking around the store, sometimes– she very rarely came inside the store before the apocalypse had happened, but it was always crowded. It was almost eerily peaceful seeing something so beloved as a superstore so empty. 

“Y’know what, I actually have a theory,” She began. “Maybe it’s ‘cause I was hanging out with my friend Dean too much before this all happened? ‘Cause he’s, like, super big into conspiracies and stuff, but a government-powered virus? That would be so fucked up. ‘Cause y’know what? You’re so right!“

[idiot-allison-blog]

Quite frankly, it seemed more than a little plausible that it could’ve been a virus sent out by the government. With the overpopulating and things of that nature happening in the world, Allison really wouldn’t have been surprised if she ever found that to be the case. “Maybe it’s the pessimism in me, but that sounds more likely than it having been some other disease that got out of control, honestly... Don’t tell Wren that though...”

[walker--ollie-blog]

Ollie nodded slowly. Right. Sure. Of course. None of them had been in the same situation he’d been in. Shit. In his defence, it was easy to forget, and slowly, painstakingly, he frowned, and deliberately quoth a simple set of words; “It’s basically water, some food, ammo, rope, a bedroll, you don’t really need a change of clothes, but socks and spare shoes is always good, some medical supplies, compass, firestarters, standard mess kit, and anything else people feel they might need.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

Alli did her best to mentally jot down everything he mentioned - she was certain she was going to forget at least half of what he said, by the time everyone was around for her to tell this to - and nodded. “I have a feeling half of us won’t be able to carry a pack that big, but I guess we’ll find out, if we ever need to.”

[johanna-spencer-blog]

“You’re such an ass.” Was Johanna’s only reply, accompanied by a shake of her head and an honest grin.

“And I don’t blame ya, there’s a million better things to stare at than little ol’ me, like yourself in a mirror.” Oh yeah, call her a dork as much as you wanted, bu Jo was actually proud of that line, lame as it was. she wasn’t one to shy away from speaking her mind, she only hoped Allison wouldn’t be too weirded out by it.

“Of course it can be, which is why you have to be very selective in choice of partner. It’s not like I go around fucking whatever moves, trust is something that needs to be there before jumping into the kinky stuff, y’know?” She explained with a ‘duh’ look, her hands gesturing in the air to further emphasize her point. “I’ve only been handcuffed once in the bedroom, and blindfolded a few times.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

Allison was quick to curse the lack of direct sunlight she’d been able to sit in for the almost pathetically pale skin she had as it turned a light shade of pink, with Jo’s compliment. “That might be the lamest pick up line I’ve ever heard.” She was sure the sarcastic remark didn’t have as much oomph as she had intended, thanks to the blush adorning her cheeks.

The look Johanna threw her way, as if it was common knowledge made Allison furrow her eyebrows slightly as she stared off at nothing in particular, across the aisle from them. Though she prided herself on knowing as much as she could, there were a lot of things she didn’t know. A lot of things she would likely never know. “All the same person?”

[walker--ollie-blog]

Ollie nodded in agreement with her general statements. “–We should have a group meeting soon, talk about our options for additional measures. In the meantime, do you wanna spread the word about survival packs? I could probably throw together a list of essentials; it’s basically what we needed on long missions, right?”

[idiot-allison-blog]

“I don’t know what missions you thought we went on...but the longest I’ve ever been from home is, well, this, so...” She had mostly been teasing, but sometimes she couldn’t help but wonder how much he viewed them as being soldiers under his command. “I’ll definitley let everyone know though.”

[johanna-spencer-blog]

“Darling, it’s called sarcasm, I’m sure you are very familiar with it.” Johanna replied with a snort, shaking her head. Their conversations tended to take turns towards the ridiculous, and this wasn’t the exception. It was just so easy to relax and just be around the blonde.

“You are forced to watch me go back and forth around this place all day, I’m pretty sure you can tell me what crazy does, by now.” Not that life was, in general, very exciting in the store. She mostly occupied her time by checking on her contraptions, creating new ones, making whatever improvements she could for everyone, and working out on a corner, away from prying eyes, which was when she let her mind wander and her body sweat off the tension and frustration, her fears and memories.

“Eh, I guess it just depends on what you consider as weird. Kinks are kinks, no matter how tame or extreme they may be, it’s just up to people’s tastes.” Now, this was new terrain for them, never before having ventured into such a random, but at the same time, deep subject. “Compare the blindfold to closing your eyes as someone kisses your neck,it forces you to rely on sensation and that heightens the experience, the feeling. Now, multiply that rush, that shiver running down your spine by a hundred, and then you’ll start understanding why I like it so much.” Okay,so that was way more than she had ever shared with anyone that wasn’t her lover, but this was the end of the world, what difference did it make if she opened up?

[idiot-allison-blog]

“Me? Familiar with sarcasm? Am I even saying that word right?” she said, furrowing her eyebrows slightly as she pretended to contemplate her own question.

“I have far better things to do with my time than watch you twenty-four-seven, thank you.” Okay, maybe she didn’t really, but that didn’t mean she spent her time doing that ever. Well, maybe once or twice, but that was only cause Johanna had a tendency to do things a little more recklessly than need be, and she didn’t want anyone dying, if she could help it. 

Allison listened to the explanation, only to end up pulling a face again. She had no experience with kissing, but that seemed to be a far more embarrassing confession than still being a virgin. “Honestly, I still don’t get how that could be fun. They could do anything to you. It sounds like an actual nightmare waiting to happen.”

[sophiavanderwel-deactivated2016]

Ruby snickers. “Good, because I’m glad that we have each other while we suffer together.” And that’s sappy. So goddamn sappy, but hey, Ruby means it. Ruby a year ago would’ve steered clear of anything sappy like that, but thanks to the fucking zombies, she’s kind of softening up. Or maybe it’s the fact that she’s been spending time with good people. Yeah, that’s probably it. Allison is a breath of fresh air and she’s pretty sure she’s not going to leave Allison’s side for a long time.  

The redhead makes a sound of disgust and rolls her eyes. “I know that. But come on, we could die any day. And sex is a good tension reliever, I mean, come on.” She pauses for a moment, and then a wide grin is spreading across her face. “Maybe it’ll get Ollie to loosen up.” 

[idiot-allison-blog]

“We are such losers,” Allison says, a small hint of a grin threatening to tug at the corners of her lips and lightly nudges Ruby with her arm.

Allison opens her mouth to respond - though mostly just to say that there are plenty of other ways to relieve tension - but is cut off with the comment about Ollie. The thought makes her somewhat jokingly dry-heave. “I don’t think any amount of ‘tension relief’ will ever get him to loosen up,” she says as her nose scrunches up again at the thought. She really can’t blame her though - literally everyone they shared the space with were extremely easy on the eyes, even if she has no intention of sleeping with any of them for the most obvious of reasons.

[cillianlewis-deactivated2016092]

“How did you guess?” Cillian chuckled, watching her face of disgust with amusement, “just a running joke we have, I hope he wouldn’t actually consider doing something like that.”

He smiled as she mentioned the stereotypical rain of England. He thought back to his youth growing up in Yorkshire, the rolling hills, the green fields, but also the towns with their grey facades and unknown corners. He shook his head, “I think the best way to describe it is grey, really - it would very often be cloudy, and we were more likely to get a few light showers throughout the day than a huge downpour. Although, we did get some pretty awful flooding sometimes.”

He paused for a moment, thinking about the other elements of his home country, “when the sun came out for even one day, everyone would be rushing to buy barbecue supplies, sunbathing, going to the beach. It felt like we only ever got about three days of good, hot weather a year. And even then we would probably complain that it was too hot, or that we had managed to get sunburn at the weekend.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

Allison really didn’t want to pry too much and make Cillian emotional, so she figured weather was a safe, albeit a little cliche, topic of conversation. And also she was truly just curious. If ever given the chance, she knew she wouldn’t hesitate at all to travel. Maybe, just maybe, they would be lucky enough to see the rebuild of society where travelling would be made possible again. 

“Does it snow a lot? Cause, I mean, when it snows here - like, not even half an inch - everything gets shut down. It’s like the end of the world...so to speak,” she said, making a face at the slightly hint of irony in her words. Not only would the winter here be hell for them, most likely, but what used to be jokingly referred to as “the end of the world” by locals, would be taking place during the actual end of the world. 

[cillianlewis-deactivated2016092]

“I’m usually good at running, I’d always go for a run in the mornings before work. It’s just that one time you go a bit too hard and it hits you right here,” he grumbled, pointing to his chest.

He scanned the selves, eventually spotting the usual box, “that one, Ventolin, top right,” he pointed, “this is going to feel like absolute heaven,” he grinned, he was pretty sure he looked mildly insane, but by this point he honestly couldn’t care less.

“Bet you’re glad you walked in on me now, aren’t you?” Cillian joked, leaning back against the trolley, “what a bloody hassle, I am sorry about all of this.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

“Well, I guess, as long as it doesn’t happen all the time and there is something here to make it better, telling Ollie to go easy on you is a little bit pointless,” Allison muttered. She really felt bad that it had gotten to this point, even if she could only imagine how much pain he was in. 

Fortunately, a moment later, he found what he needed and Allison grabbed it for him, holding it out for Cillian to take. The grin on his face was more than a little dopey, but it was an understandable reaction. She had no idea what could’ve happened, had they not managed to find it. And she definitely didn’t want to dwell on that thought. 

“I actually am. If not for your sake, at least for everyone else’s so no one had to find you lifeless - or, worse, undead - somewhere around here,” Allison said with a small shrug. She hated admitting when she did things out of the kindness of her heart, so she usually tried to play it off as being a selfish move. “You really don’t have to apologize though. Just don’t push yourself too hard anymore. No one will question you, if you need a break. I know you’re the new guy, and people are probably still wary of you, but you’re one of us and we’re not gonna let you push yourself just to prove your worth.”

[johanna-spencer-blog]

“They say that voicing things out loud is the kind of validation people appreciate, so I thought it was about time I gave as much respect to our flourishing community.” Johanna said with a nod in return, somehow making it seem as if she was doing them a favor, but it was all in jest, of course. “And, tell me, what else do you think a crazy person would do? I’d like to be prepared in case anyone requires further proof of my mental health.” The brunette challenged with curiosity, staying on less heavy topics for the time being.

“Not even then, because while the lack of experience gives room for doubt, you can still find something very arousing,can you not? Unless you tell me you’ve never been sexually excited by anything, which would then change things, my friend.” Jo said with a shrug, not really lingering on the little fact that the blonde had just shared. It wasn’t her place, and she wasn’t one to pry for information on people’s uttermost private matters. “The difference lies in both the feeling and the texture, at least for me. I mean, good for those that like paddles, but that just seems too Greek house initiation for my tastes.”

[idiot-allison-blog]

“Unless you’re counting the cockroach I stepped on yesterday, I wouldn’t say our community is ‘flourishing’,” Allison said with a soft breath of a laugh. “Stagnant, more like.” If it wasn’t the pessimism talking, it was usually replaced easily with her cynicism - something she was sure most people were starting to grow tired of.

“You’d have to do something crazy for me to know what crazy does - I’m, surprisingly enough, not well versed in the area.” Insane, possibly, but only minimally crazy, is how Allison saw herself. Even if it was just a joking topic of conversation - obviously Johanna wasn’t crazy, she was one of the more normal ones, if anything.

“I mean...I have, but...nothing weird. to each their own and everything, but I have a feeling that, if I ever end up having any sort of sex life, it’ll probably be as vanilla as it gets.” She really didn’t care much if she ended up dying in the apocalypse a virgin; she was more upset by the fact that she didn’t get to escape this awful town before everything came crashing to the ground around her.

Allison scrunched up her nose a little at the explanation of the paddle. It certainly didn’t sound pleasing. Though neither did being slapped in any sort of way by anything. “And what is it anyone gets out of handcuffs and blindfolds, exactly? Cause, to me, that just sounds terrifying and more terrifying when combined.”

[leon-hastings]

Rooftop Encounters (OPEN)

[leon-hastings]

“It’s not so bad, at least we’ll have him to entertain us in the days to come or until such time Oliver spots him and takes him out.”

“So… Treadmill duty then?” Jamie asked after a while, a bit disappointed that it was something so mundane. But it was better than eating a cockroach which in reality seemed to be the only insect around aside from flies hanging out with the zombies down below.

[idiot-allison-blog]

“I’m surprised the BBs didn’t scare him off in the other direction,” she said. A brief thought of Wren dragging up the possibly undead Bill Murray to do extensive research on drew a soft chuckle from her. 

“Nah, I’m just fucking with you. Clearly something happened there - we’ll call it a draw.” The chores kept her from losing her mind out of boredom, so giving them up, even just as a once-off, wasn’t likely to happen anytime soon. Especially with how, with each passing day, her will to stay in the building grew smaller and smaller.