keeping you in check, keeping you obsessed
play me on repeat endlessly in your head
idoliized - an independent dash-only "semi-private" multimuse roleplay blog for myst / myeong so (mystery), bin-hae ahn (abby), tae-hyeong kweon (baby), jinyoung yang (jinu), sungwoon (sussie) and more from kpop demon hunters, as composed by kira (30, she/her, est)! sideblog to @foxidol!
please read my rules prior to interacting! please also note that myst, binnie, and tae are my three most common muses (after my romance, of course), so you are far more likely to see them than you are any of the other muses.
you know i'm the only one who'll love your sins,
feel the way my voice gets underneath your skin
about - myst | bin-hae | tae-hyeong | jinyoung | sungwoon | other muses
tag list - askbox | opens | wishlist | interaction calls
stealing souls with bren (@theflexorcist | @bipa-hero | @projecthonmoon), catt (@heartpatterned | @patternedpopstar | @strungfate), and freddie (@leadersaja | @mulgwisin) thanks to highly intertwined lore, casual mentions, and being mutually friend-shaped!
play a saja boy too? you can check this post for how i generally handle dupes!
now we're running wild,
yeah you're down on your knees, i'mma be your idol!
RULES.
. 001. . this is a sideblog that is attached to my romance (@foxidol), which means all follows will come from him. while this means i obviously can't technically be mutuals-only, i will only be interacting with people who i'm mutuals with on them and who follow this blog (unless it's a first interaction for someone i've otherwise meaningfully interacted with).
please note that i am going to be very highly selective with this blog (hence why i've opted to label it "semi-private"), to the point that i will be softblocking anyone who follows that i have had little/no meaningful interactions with on romance first. this is primarily due to the fact that i've had bad prior experiences when branching out on other muses and that ultimately i want romance to be (and remain) my primary muse without being overshadowed by other characters i'm less invested in.
. 002. . due to the above rule, i'm just going to state that much of my general rules of thumb for romance will apply here as well. rather than restate them all, i'm just going to recommend that you give them a skim if you haven't already, since reiterating them just feels a little moot when this being a "semi-private" sideblog means that you're already familiar with me and romance and are going to be aware of all my usual dos and don'ts.
. 003. . there are various heavy themes on this blog for a number of topics, so please don't follow me here if you're not going to be comfortable with these themes coming across your dash - i try to tag anything especially triggering, but i can't promise i'll always catch every single mention, and after a certain point, there are some topics that i'm not going to warn for since they are somewhat labeled on the tin.
mystery: animal violence + cruelty (he's a giant wolf-creature that was an attack dog), mild body horror, cosmic horror (eldritch horror lore), disassociation / unreality, monsterfucking.
binnie: war + death, desertion, terminal illness + hospitals + end-of-life care (he's a reaper who primarily adheres to his role of tending to the dying), anxiety + self-consciousness
tae: slavery, noncon + dubcon (he's a former sex slave turned concubine to gwi-ma), cannibalism + human sacrifice, torture, manipulation, casual cruelty
sungwoon: disassociation + delusion (his life is apparently one big art film piece where the plot twist is that the live interest isn't actually real + maybe never was), grief + mourning, unreality
. 004. . i don't mind people taking inspiration from my interpretations of any characters so long as it is just inspiration and not outright stealing. no, seriously, i don't mind - because i'm a big believer in that people can both start from the same place only to end up with wildly different outcomes and that people can independently get to the same answer using different methods - and i'm conscious enough to recognize that with the characterizations we're given in canon, sometimes, there's only so many ways you can take a character within the umbrella of a concept.
however, i do ask that if you intend to be lifting something that's more of a key component of any of my muses (detailed origin stories, core characterization concepts, etc), that you at least check in with me first. i'm almost definitely going to be fine with it, i'd just rather have the adult discussion beforehand rather than the emotional icky mouth feel of stumbling across something on the dash, y'know?
and yes, i do consider most of my faceclaims to fall under this umbrella of "please at least give me the courtesy of saying something before you just fling that at me" if we are "mutuals" (felix being my primary exception) - because almost all of my faces are slightly more niche ones that i've picked on my own vibes for the individual character, not a popular fancast or a live action equivalent, so while i fully agree with the thought that i don't own a face and have no right to stop someone who wants to use them, it's also an understandably icky situation to feel like one of my faces is being used by someone else partially because my use put them on a closer partner's radar (since, y'know, most of the people who are here are already close enough to me that i feel comfortable sharing it), especially when the fandom is so small and my faces are ones i took the time to try to pick ones that wouldn't have any pre-existing associations from other muses to color their own feels + interpretations.
. 005. . i'll be honest in that i'm going to be playing a lot of my interactions as i go in regards to verse continuity and ship status. obviously, i don't expect anyone to be cheating on each other, and even if i'm personally comfortable playing with doubles on every one of the canons here (with or without a multiverse explanation, thanks myst + sus for being my canonical multiverse-travelers), i recognize not everyone else is and that's fine too! i'm happy to roll with whatever explanations and such you are in turn.
along similar lines, while i'm not going to hard rule out the potential of shipping with anyone else, if the chemistry is right, i will also disclaim that with much of my character lore being intertwined with bren's + catt's + freddie's by default (since most of them were spawned privately with these three before they got powerful enough to leave; this is why the three of them are my mains here), i'm very likely to default to the following ships unless we've built chemistry otherwise (which i'm very happy to do if we click!)
mystery: soulmated with jinu chae
tae: infatuated with jae-byeol
jinyoung: captivated with byung-chul
sungwoon: entwined with do hyun
tragic news for everyone (jk i know you love me) - i'm not dead, and after a lot of marinating on what i want to do, i think i'm finally starting to circle an answer.
over the next several weeks (since yeah, this isn't going to be happening in a hurry, between both how much i have to do and the fact my brain is so burned out on writing up blog info that it's still noping out of finishing ren's new bio section), i'm going to be slowly tidying up and revamping this blog to better bring it in line with where i want it to be.
what does that mean exactly? well.
to put it simply, i'm going to be reworking this blog to function more as a way for people to interact with my other muses that i'm happy to play on the dash but don't have the motivation or desire to give their own blog (or be on their actual blog more regularly).
in practice, not a whole lot is actively going to be changing on y'all's end - this blog is still not going to my main focus, and it's still going to be where my established partners can go for myst (mystery), tae-hyeong (baby), jinyoung (jinu), bin-hae (abby), and sungwoon (sussie). i'm just basically also going to be adding bitgaram (abby*), rommy (romance*), siwoo (abby / indie oc), macai (oc), and maybe a couple others as well as using hana (+ kpdh-verse eutrope) interchangeably between here + their actual blogs.
on my end, i'm going to be slowly redoing all of my info (both for blog info + for muses, since none of that has properly been updated since last summer) and deleting all my old fc posts (+ possibly nuking all my old tags) just to get a little bit of a clean slate + give people a little bit clearer information both for me and all my idiots that i've let minorly break containment from discord to exist on the dash periodically as a treat and a threat.
okay, i have officially moved this blog over so it's attached to the correct iteration of ren-
but i'll be honest that this is also going to be percolating in my head for a little while for that i'm probably going to shuffle around my muses + add a few more (like bee + rommy), do some more official info areas, and just. generally debate how i want to be reorganizing things here too over next month. so. oops.
what keeps your soul tethered to the mortal realm?
- tae-hyeong
your cruel mind.
this world has been unkind to you. you don't truly believe you're loved. you don't believe anyone will miss you, and that is exactly why you cannot be free. the gods need you to see that you matter. you're loved. you are worthy of being mourned. you believe that being gone will make no difference. you can't fathom the fact that maybe, just maybe, you were cared for in your time on earth. in order to be free, you must realize that you will be missed. to acknowledge that you were loved is your key to being free. you've been hurt by this world, but that does not mean you have no one. you will be grieved the way you deserve to be, if only you accept the fact.
tagged by: @theflexorcist
tagging: honestly at this point idk who hasn't done it so steal it if you want it c:
after a lot of thought, i think i'm going to actually put out an official statement about it rather than just letting things be as they are.
for right now, this blog (as well as my multi) is going to be sporadic activity. functionally, this isn't really going to change very much for what's happening now in regards to that it's going to be very hit or miss for when/if i'm around on the dash and what i'm replying to, so in the grand scheme of things, nothing's going to be changing.
to put it simply - i have muse for ren. i have a boatload of muse for ren. he's not going anywhere in the remotely near future and neither am i.
it's just been really really extremely hard for me right now to find the motivation lately to try to be around on the dash + replying to things when i'm... essentially following about 10 muns overall at this point, the vast majority of whom are varying degrees of inactive on the dash (whether through having their own slumps on the dash or outright being on hiatus, and i just don't see that functionally changing at the moment when what few new follows i do get (or, really, anyone i'm not already interacting with regularly) just don't seem to be all that interested in actually interacting with ren.
honestly, some days i debate trying to rework ren entirely, but i don't think that would fix the problem to drop him on a new url when nothing would actually functionally change.
anyway. like i said. functionally, this isn't really a shock to anyone, i've been pretty mia on the dash + mostly really responsive on discord for the past while. i just. figured i should probably actually say something to make it official.
Even if Jaesung had disappeared down into his depthless sea, between here and there, he could still hear any voices above the surfaces nearby... if he listened out for them. More importantly, he could still hear when Binnie called out for him somewhere above the surface of the pool. It sounded far away but he responded right away. Swimming from where he'd dozed off and through the barrier to appear inside the pool water as though he had been there the whole time. Further still, he grabbed the tiled edge with hands then changing from crooked claws to long and calloused human fingers.
In the space between the pool and the kitchen, Jae had done his best to evaporate the water on himself with his powers alone but his hair was still dripping when he closed in on the reaper. The urgency stilled in him when he saw the reaper and his feet slowed while he made sure not to walk too quietly so Binnie could know where he was coming from.
A curious set of eyes looked from the reaper's own and down to the strawberry that appeared to be offered up as a gift. A valentine's treat, even... The gesture took him aback and he had to stand there for a second, looking at Binnie with slight bafflement as he assessed if this was really for him, before he smiled softly and leaned forward to bite from the fruit slathered in sugary and creamy goodness.
If he could, he would live exclusively on strawberries prepared by Binnie from now on. The smile on his face said as much after he'd swallowed the treat down. "Tastes wonderful." It seemed as though the reaper was going to keep surprising him and now he felt bad that he'd let a surprise for Binnie stay as merely an idea in his mind. "Happy Valentine's Day, pookie." Jae put a hand on his shoulder to hold as he leaned forward to kiss his cheek as a thank you, before then realizing he'd gotten chocolate on him and wiping it off with his thumb. "Sorry... I got chocolate on you."
It didn't take long at all for the water demon to appear - a little wet, hair dripping where it plastered against his skin, but none the less eager as he slipped into the kitchen, his step loud enough for the reaper to easily track his movement without looking up (because that was the kind of thoughtful Jaesung was, trying not to startle him with the quiet they both knew he was capable of, if he wanted to). Bin-hae glanced up at him to offer a shy smile, wiggling the strawberry before his eyes widened, hurriedly wobbling with his other hand darting forward so he didn't drop the cream, cheeks pinking a little bit with embarrassment-
-that Jaesung immediately capitalized on to lean forward, biting into the strawberry in a way that had him relying on every single nerve he had not to jump. You did this on purpose, he reminded his traitor heart, trying to will it back down again as he set the stem aside. You're not allowed to get skittish about it now. Taking a moment to swallow, still trying to push down his blush, he let his tongue dart out to wet his lips before he spoke, taking care to speak a little slower, to try to keep the words on his tongue instead of stumbling off it. "H-happy V-valent-tines' Day, hyung." (Well. It wasn't perfect. But you couldn't say he hadn't tried.)
And then, just as he was starting to get his heart under control again, Jaesung leaned in and brushed his lips along the reaper's cheek, flooding his face again with a burning heat that flooded up to his ears and down his collar. "D-don'tworryaboutit!" he squeaked out, fingers flexing - not scurrying away, thankfully, but having to consciously hold his ground a moment so he didn't just burst into flames directly in front of his hyung, all because he'd been given a single kiss to the cheek from the demon he had feelings for. (His lover? His boyfriend? Neither word quite sounded right, but... Something like it did. For Jaesung. Because there wasn't much else he could think of to call his hyung.)
Romantic or platonic?: Romantic, I meant it when I said I want you to be mine... and I'm already yours.
A night in or dinner out or an activity?: A whole day together, just us two? Brunch at home, sightseeing for lunch through to dinner, dinner out in a small restaurant, a karaoke room just for us before going home?
Ice cream or chocolate covered strawberries?: Chocolate covered strawberries. I've never tried them together with someone else.
What's your perfect date?: Being with you, doing anything but I want to do something where I can get to know you better.
Would you cook for me?: I'd try my best to follow a recipe for you, but it'd be safer to eat food we order. I never really cook.
Would you let me cook for you?: I'd love to taste your cooking.
Can we make-out?: We can and we should, please. We can make-out whenever and as often as you'd like. There's no pressure, though, ever.
Make out in private or in public?: We had better do it in private... but I'd make out with you anywhere.
Do you like to cuddle?: I not only like it but love to cuddle, specifically with you.
Blankets or no blankets for cuddling?: Several blankets so I can keep you warm, because I don't want you to be cold when I hold you.
Couch or bed?: Wherever you want to but could I? Cuddle with you in your bed?
What are at least 3 hobbies of yours?: Singing covers, learning other instruments, reading books about the world.
Tell me something about you no else knows: I haunted the CEO of my label, to make him add me to the band. I'm not proud of it now, but... I'm glad I did it to end up meeting the band and to end up meeting you as an idol.
Why do you want to be my valentine?: I want to go on a real date with you, get to know you more, spend time with you, and make a day all about us.
What makes you a good Valentine?: I'm a good listener and I'll try to be attentive of your needs.
@mulgwisin -> valentine applications for the boys is also good
Okay, maybe he shouldn't have gone on that whole variety show with Jinu right before they went on hiatus.
It had been a rather easy shoot, all things considered, and he'd definitely had fun with it - but he hadn't been expecting Jaesung to take it seriously enough that he'd come home to find the water demon had filled out the exact same application with all the seriousness he could muster before he presented it to the reaper.
A soft little laugh escaped him to take the paper, lips twitching upwards at how very Jaesung it was, his cheeks flaming at the answers but his heart caught on one - I meant it when I said I want you to be mine... and I'm already yours.
He bit his lip, a little shy as he folded the paper back up, knowing it was going to be tucked away in a place of honor in his work space, where he'd see it every time he found his way back to their studio, before he let his eyes lift up to the water demon. "I... shouldn't have any more public appearances for the month," he murmured. "W-would you... want to g-go out on a d-d-date?"
Bin-hae's voice was quiet as he shuffled in through the door of the house he was renting, pushing it closed again with his hip around the rustle of plastic bags, not wanting to let too much of the cold in when he knew the water demon would be in the heated pool he'd searched so long for, wanting to spoil his hyung with somewhere proper to swim while he was on hiatus. Bags on the counter, hands washed, then carefully working with what he'd picked up, knowing he wouldn't have long before he'd have a dripping wet water demon hovering.
But just long enough for him to wash a single strawberry, dip it in first the chocolate, then the whipped cream, held up in his hand in time for Jaesung to come into his personal space. "Happy Valentine's Day?"
Even without a real drumkit, Jaesung's drumming looked just as enthusiastic as when he was performing live on stage. He was deeply focused on the music and following the sound of the other's voice. The sound of which warmed him right through, no matter how often he'd heard him sing now, but you wouldn't be able to tell besides the smallest smile apparent on his lips as he tapped away.
Quietly fading the drumming to a stop when Binnie addressed him. He never tried to hide the way his eyes softened specifically for the reaper or the way he visibly seemed to gain renewed energy just from hearing that one word from him. "Hm?" There was no doubt that the demon enjoyed these evenings, especially now that everything in the city was frozen. In the studio he could drink up all the quality time he'd be missing from not being able to teleport to and from the Saja dorm as easily during winter. With that thought fresh in his mind...
"Right now? Oh... no, I'd want to finish our session." He smiled more, "but... it wouldn't even have to be heated, I'd go swimming in any pool if I could. I know it would scare people... or make them suspicious if I suddenly disappear and magically reappear in a public swimming pool, so I've never been. — Are you thinking of going to one?"
He could feel it, almost as if it were a physical presence in the room - the weight of Jaesung's regard, draped so absolutely over his shoulders, the way it had almost from the moment they'd met, when he'd been gushing to the water demon like a lovesick fan and he'd listened, without doubt or judgment, only to unequivocally return the sentiment to the youngest of their band. (Sometimes, he thought it might crush him under its weight, under the expectations - for all that there were none - of those intense eyes, but he didn't, he didn't, the swoop of his stomach enough to keep him here, to keep him standing with the water demon that had thought nothing of kissing him there, in a studio covered in mistletoe, as though there had never been a world where he wouldn't have.) It was what saw the fluttering of those drumsticks slow to a stop in the water demon's hand, motivated the careful deliberation of the words he'd been offered. And it was what prompted the reaper to speak again, to keep being brave here, in this sanctuary they'd cared out for themselves.
"I.... Not exactly..." he murmured, a flash of heat worming its way through his throat and collarbone. "Romance is starting to nest down, and with everyone being so distracted, I... thought it might be best to rent my own place. A-away from all of them." The heat intensified, threatening to choke back his words, forcing him to push past it to keep going. "And...... the place I picked..... h-has an indoor pool." Since I thought you'd like it. Since I remembered you complaining about your bathtub feeling small. Since I remembered you saying you couldn't swim so much in the winter. Since I thought you might stay for more than just a visit, if I made it an option for you.
