A Renovation of the Heart

An effort towards a revolution of character, which comes from being transformed through an ongoing personal relationship with God in Christ

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Micah 5–7

Micah 5

Again it is hard to blame the Israelites for thinking the Messiah was going to be a warrior or political figure to overthrow the governments that were oppressing them. Without the revelation of God's true focus of humanities liberation -- the freedom from sin -- it would be hard to see the prophesies fulfilled through Jesus Christ. I'm speaking for myself here but I bet i can peg these thoughts on the Israelites.

Micah 6

Oh the blame game! What an awful thing we do when we get angry at and bitter towards God and become rebellious towards Him. I imagine the shock (pretending God could be surprised) on His face when they charge God with wrongdoing when He has pilled blessings upon blessings on His people.

The section about sacrifices brings to mind a theme that I love! Sacrifices vs the heart. God doesn't want sacrifices... Do we really think that if we did actions, God would be pleased with our lives? Even godly men like David and here with Micah knew that this is not the case. God doesn't want meaningless things from us. If we sacrificed a thousand bulls or a thousand hours serving in ministries and missions trips and our hearts were concerned with what that meant for self-image or if that erased the guilt of sins we have committed, we'd be better off keeping our bulls and time and spending it on ourselves. We can't buy God's favor! ITS ALREADY OURS! All He wants is us to allow the truths of His love to penetrate our hearts and have our actions be a direct result of God's intentional ministry in our lives

Micah 7

I feel like Micah sometimes when I think about the fruit in ministry. It is a lot of work and a lot of fun but sometimes the evidence for why it's worth the effort is nowhere to be found. But Micah is not destroyed. His hope is in the Lord! Though he fails at turning the nation back to God, though no one heeds his warning, God will forgive their sins. It's a mystery why God is so patient with us. Who forgives and forgets so freely? 

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Where did I go?

The original purpose of this blog was to chronicle my Bible reading plan. But I've taken some time off recently. As mentioned before, I attended a retreat with GCC last weekend. There I was challenged to let the message of God's love sink into my heart and let that be the motivation behind everything I do. One of the messages I got from the speaker, Dan Baumann, was that in order for change to occur in this world and in ourselves is to let God love you. So, I'm taking time to let that message of acceptance sink in. I do too much... and I feel guilt when I don't do enough, thinking that I'm not doing anything to contribute to my sanctification, to make up for my wasted years and failures. I still need to learn that simple message that God loves me, desires me, affirms me. I've honestly lost sight of the purpose behind doing this blog and reading the Bible in a year. First it was to learn the WHOLE written message of God's love for us and keep myself accountable/think about what I'm reading. But I've deviated from that. (So, the question's purpose, "Where did I go?", is two-fold. I've lost my way and I've stopped appearing on Tumblr.) So, that's why I've stopped.

I will return eventually. The format is still up in the air though. I am still on track in my journey through the Bible. I've been also reading a chapter a day with a brother since June. Up until this week, we've read books in the New Testament or Old Testament books I haven't read yet. 

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GCC College Retreat 2014 | Intimacy with Jesus | 1/31-2/2

This was my 2nd "last" college retreat. I didn't expect to come back after last year but circumstances led to me being at Harvey Cedars Bible Conference yet again. 

To sum it up, retreat was freeing. That's one word that fits quite nicely. I learned that God loves me for me and not what I can/cannot do nor what I do/don't do. Dan spoke about Jesus' baptism and how God affirmed Him before any ministry happened, before discipleship, before miracles, before teaching. Before Jesus did anything, God let Him know that He loves Him and is pleased with Him. Similar to that, God doesn't want us to lose sight of His love because the best way for us to change the world and be an impact is for us to be loved by God and let others watch. It sounds selfish but it truly is just God and me, God and you. Jesus retreated often to pray, He constantly point his followers to God. He wasn't making his life about Him or us, really, it was about God and His love. That's how things changed in that day and that's how things will change today. 

I think my issue was that I was making God's love up in my head, saying that if God loves me, I'll see this and that happen when i want it or if I don't cry in a song then I'm not experiencing God's love. I was dictating what God's love looks like. And when I turned a blind eye to what God's love was actually like and didn't see my expectations fulfilled, I believed God didn't love me. So it was a battle to get out of the self defeating thoughts that said I wasn't getting God's love because Im not seeing certain things i my life and circumstances. Saturday night was the night where I battled with this the most. I was so frustrated and felt so guilty that I was working hard for God but not seeing the love I wanted. But what I came to realize after talking to my FLGet/coservant was that instead of selectively looking at what I think God looks like I should pray for God to open my eyes to the simple obvious truth that He loves me and make my life and ministry based on that. So I felt free because that was my new obsession! I was obsessed with the Love of God in its purest form, its truest sense. I wanted it to soak and permeate my life.

There were other things I learned but this is the one life altering truth that I thought was relevant to blog about.

[iduclairheismygod]

Micah 1–4

Micah 1

What else can a person do but be humbled and sweetly broken when God takes away the things they place their identity and faith in? I don't like this but its is such a wake up call when God lovingly does this for us.

Micah 2, 3

If someone is honest, they would say that they would want to give people only good news. A doctor never wants to tell someone they have cancer. But if he didn't tell them, there would be some serious consequences. This is the same way for God's people. If we don't let people know what the Word says and, even more importantly, if we don't listen to what the Word says we are doing ourselves and others great harm.

Micah 4

When God promises something it will come to pass. But sometimes it doesn't come when we expect it to. That anticipation and yearning is painful and agonizing. I think this is what the woman in labor analogy is referring to. But even in that, hope gives strength and that is what I believe God is doing by adorning the woman of this passage.

[iduclairheismygod]

Isaiah 9–12

Isaiah 9

Here again is another reference to the military nature of the Messiah. It is not explicit but it is brought up in the context of battle in its affairs and glories. I think we do have to give the Israelites credit. This is misleading without a retrospective view or divine insight. Misleading for the world but spiritually we understand that this is a spiritual kingdom that Christ reigns over.

Isaiah 10

There was a part that comments on how things are used. A hammer cannot say that it is moving the person holding it or that the hammer is holding the person. Same goes with God. We are used for His purpose, we can't say that we are trying to get Him on our side... we work with the Lord, we follow Him.

Isaiah 11

v9. As the waters cover the sea. That is so obvious. The sea is water. Therefore the knowledge of God will be such a part of the culture on earth that it will define it.

Isaiah 12

This is a picture of how to respond to God's mercy and grace. We ought to praise. Is what we ought to do because He shows His love in this way. If we truly felt loved, we would respond with SHOUTS of praise. 

[iduclairheismygod]

Isaiah 5–8

Isaiah 5

I was really intrigued by the parallel between this and John 15 (the vine and branches) it was really good to read into it like that and see that God has not changed and still desires His people to remain in Him so that good fruit can be produced from them.

The other part that got my attention was the woe to "those who call evil good and good evil" (v20). this is still going on today...

Isaiah 6

I've read this passage several times and each time, the part of the coal being brought to Isaiah's lips makes me cringe. I have a hard time with hot drinks and hot food. I think this is everyone's issue but its so painful for me and my tongue gets burned easily. It is so painful for the next few hours or days (depending on how badly i've burned myself). so I can't understand why Isaiah did not mention that here! BUT this was a good burning, I'm sure. though it probably hurt in a way (if you could feel pain in your visions) but the result is glorious!!! God rids you of your guilt and cleanses you of your sins!!! :D

v8 is a good verse to think about the willingness we ought to have when doing God's work. I wonder if Isaiah would have had the same response though if he got the message before the question was asked.... lol it would have been harder. But that's the beauty of the heart willing to serve the Lord! The person who has this heart knows it has the potential to be either hard or easy or in between, but they know to serve God and struggle is better than to not serve Him at all! At least i think it should be this way...

Isaiah 7

I think it is interesting that the prophesy about Immanuel is brought up in the context of this military conflict. Though it was announced as a marker within a timeline, it is interesting to see this here and to give the people of Israel the benefit of the doubt. I had thought that the jews were so silly to think that Christ was to be a military leader for them and not a spiritual leader to bring revival. But here it is not hard to make the incorrect assumption. I wonder why God made it so. Maybe it had to do with the curse he brought up in the last chapter (6:9-10) so that they would not be able to perceive Christ correctly unless they were right with the Lord. hmm...

also i dont want to try God's patience (v13). I think that comes from a disobedient or unbelieving heart

Isaiah 8

This naming a child in the name of a prophesy is odd. But it happened with Hosea. I think God wants to make the gravity of Israel's situation apparent to His people and gives them constant reminders of what the prophets are doing and also why they do it. Their lives are to serve God 100% and they need to always be reminded of the work they ought to do

[iduclairheismygod]

Isaiah 1–4

Isaiah 1

v13 That one speaks so loudly to me. God doesn't want things that are meaningless, things we do out of habit or whatever. He wants our heart to be in it -- a heart that worships Him! I met up with Glory a while and we were talking about this. He was reading a book that basically said that you may be doing great things and things in ministry but if you're not doing it for God... it means nothing for your growth and nothing for your relationship with God. To me it would be better to not do it at all. Like Cain's sacrifice. It was alright but it wasn't his best for God. Meaning, he didn't know God's worth in his heart... therefore his sacrifice was meaningless and didn't please the Lord. God requires intentional and costly worship

Isaiah 2

v21 is interesting to see in a judgment chapter. There is something connected between trusting in men and turning away from God. I believe this extends to trusting in oneself. When we trust in our abilities (pride) we turn away from God. We are telling Him that we don't need Him... when its a fact that we do.

Isaiah 3

I think God's wrath here and their punishment is appropriate. It is said, God doesn't like sin in the slightest bit. But how people are punished fits their crime. It reflects their hearts. It is decayed, ugly and lifeless. And he gives them an appearance that matches their insides. To be honest, I would hate that if that were to happen to me today. My insides are horrible and for it to become apparent to everyone, I'd die of embarrassment. God also takes what is valued to them and what they build their image upon.

Isaiah 4

The mention of the pillars of fire and smoke was a blessing to me. It was a promise to restore His people to a place where they once were. The two pillars represented God's presence with His people and He was promising to dwell with them once again! This passage has a strong theme of restoration and it really blesses and comforts me. v4 explains it well! He will call the remnant "holy", set apart and restored! I long for more restoration and spiritual reformation in my life.

[iduclairheismygod]

Hosea 8–14

A few thoughts

Ch 8. Being incapable of purity was a surprise given that they were from Israel. What strikes me is that their being from Israel should be what makes them pure. What I see is that this people has a way to be pure based on where they have come from, based on the God they serve. Its a shame we are are like that, as Christians. We bear the name of Christ and yet we do not act as if we follow Him.

Ch 10v12, sounds really good. I like the part about breaking up the unplowed land b/c it is time to seek the Lord. Where is my heart hard? What can I do to release my life to the lord?

Ch 11 is awesome because I feel a sense of connection with the thoughts of God's compassion. How could he turn from His people? He can't! He does what is best for them. This is how can I trust the Lord. He is always consistent!

Ch 13 talks about death being nullified through God. That is awesome because we think death is inevitable and unstoppable but God has the power to make it nothing.

God has his reasons but Chapters 11 and 14 sum up what eventually will happen with These nations. God will evict them from the land but will bring them back and restore them.

[iduclairheismygod]

Hosea 1–7

This book is very interesting. It is a prophesy in words as well as through Hosea's life. His relationship with his wife is like that of Israel and God's... and like ours and God's. We enter a relationship with God after giving of ourselves to the world. Then we come to God and find joy... to only go away from Him time and time again. Yet He is still willing to take us back. He was still wiling to take Israel back. God is a just God and must punish evil. Yet Chapter 6 talks about the reconciliation after the punishment. For most, this is comforting. For me it is a bit scary... coming back to the one who just punished me... who just hurt me. Sure I was at fault but it isn't a comfort. But if there is MUCH trust... it is actually a beautiful sight. That is true forgiveness on the part of God.

[iduclairheismygod]

The Book of Amos

There was a lot of judgement declared on the people

I really like the compulsion he describes in the job of a prophet, they can't help but share what God has revealed to them. Amos is rebuking the people for silencing the prophets before. He has an exchange with Amaziah about this very subject. Its not like Amos chose to be a prophet but God called him from his life to live for Him. 

Though there is a lot of talk about their exile, there is a prophesy of hope at the end of the book. God is not in the business of pushing people away. He reconciles relationships and wants all nations to come to Him. 

[iduclairheismygod]

The Book of Jonah

Some thoughts:

There was a time where I thought I was being like Jonah. Where I was saying no to something God allow to be in my path, a ministry opportunity was presented to me. I didn't feel as if I was rebelling against God but it felt weird saying no to a godly thing.

This book makes me think about the balance between God's will and free will. It is a confusing fusion of concepts but both are true... yet I don't believe they are mutually exclusive. I believe God has His will and He will always get His way. However the path to God's destination for us in each step of life is fluid, in my opinion. Why? I believe God uses our choices for His purpose. He has that set destination for us but He desires for us to get to know Him in each moment of life. So in Jonah's case, his running away got him to see God's salvation for himself and we got to see God's salvation for the people on the ship. They were not only saved physically but they put their faith in God that day! God eventually brought him to Nineveh and the word was proclaimed and the people turned to God. But God did not waste this teachable moment with Jonah. He let him see that in life, there are priorities and our number one priority is to get to know the heart of God. God wants us to know Him and for us to share Him with others. So Jonah did get to where God wanted Him to be and so much more was accomplished than if Jonah went straight to Nineveh. Its not to say that wasn't God's plan b/c His will was accomplished every step of the way. Its weird but i think we can conclude that God does not waste our wrong decisions.

[iduclairheismygod]

2 Kings 14–15 ❏❏ 2 Chronicles 25–27

2 Kings 14, 2 Chronicles 25

I'm not a big fan of the seemingly disconnected favor God has on His people. He preserves Judah due to His covenant with David and He protects Israel b/c He promised Abraham. Yet they are not getting along but they can't destroy the other.

I like how in 2 Chron 25 the prophet says that God can provide much more without actually assuring the king that if he removes the hired soldiers that God WILL actually provide. He just says God is able. But isn't that enough!? Faith is assurance of things we hope for. 

2 Kings 15, 2 Chronicles 26,27

Kings come and go but the word of the Lord remains.

[iduclairheismygod]

2 Kings 12–13; 2 Chronicles 24

2 Kings 12, 2 Chronicles 24

I am very glad for the parallel chapters. 2 Kings gives the impression that Joash was murdered in innocence. Chronicles tells us why he was killed. He was a good king in the early years but he let Judah run wild and killed the priest who tried to tell him what he heard from God. I hope I am not acting similarly to Joash and refusing to hear the voice of God. I have some decisions to make about ministry at GCC and It isn't easy to figure out how God is leading me. I want to be in a position to hear God's voice. I also don't want to reject it.

2 Kings 13

Weird prophecy that Elisha had... but it would speak to prayer. We tend to stop praying after nothing happens. What if God is asking us to pray more and more about something before it happens..? Would we stop if we knew it would be just one prayer more to see His hand revealed in our lives?

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2 Kings 9–11; 2 Chronicles 22:10–23:21

2 Chronicles 22:10–23:21, 2 Kings 11

The mention of the righteous people in Judah always excites me. Its a taste of God's promise to restore. There has been much done to preserve the land from total darkness. If the Lord had not been there, the proliferation of evil and generational sin would have gone on and it would be a hopeless mess. But we know that Jesus ultimately restores the line of David. God had to preserve the lineage as long as there were kings for many reasons but obviously to fulfill the prophesy of the Messiah coming from the line of David.

2 Kings 9, 10

Very gruesome deaths but God doesn't joke around with His word. It WILL come to pass. There isn't any force that can oppose God's word. 

It is a shame that Jehu could not stay faithful to the Lord and chose to serve idols rather than God. I think it was a great ride for Jehonadab to ride along this great warrior for God but I hope he knew to get rid of Jehu's influence when he turned from the Lord. I always hope that for myself and the guys that I mentor. I hope that if I fall away, they would have the sense to stop following. I hope that I wouldn't be in that position in the first place though!

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2 Kings 8:16–29, 2 Chronicles 21:1–22:9

2 Kings 8:16–29, 2 Chronicles 21:1–22:9

The influence of Ahab was now in Judah. It was preserved for a season but now through marriage, the association as well as the sins are back. But thankfully God loves His people and remains faithful above all our iniquities. BUT THE WAY THESE PEOPLE DIE IS CRAZY! If they make a movie of the History of Israel, not only would it be long but it would be so bloody!

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2 Kings 5:1–8:15

2 Kings 5

We all have our own ideas about how God will bless us or take care of our prayer requests. When God answers our prayers and provides a way for us to get what we want, we are upset when it isn't exactly what we imagined. Our humanity and personal preferences get in the way of us fully embracing the gifts and blessings God gives so freely to us.

2 Kings 6-8:15

The stories of Israel's encounters with the Arammeans are quite hilarious! The blind troops, the hallucinations, the miracles are just outlandish! God surely has a sense of humor! 

One of the things that stood out to me was the story of the commander of Israel who did not believe Elisha. When God says something, it would be wise to try not to go against Him. He is God, how can we oppose Him? It would be foolish to assume we would know better.

[iduclairheismygod]

2 Kings 1–4

2 Kings 1

Baal-Zebub sounds a lot like Beelzebub, another name for the Devil. I think God was completely insulted at this because why would one go anywhere but God? He is the source. No one else compares! I like how Elijah is just sitting on a hill in the middle of the day... so random!

2 Kings 2

The way this passage was written was such a spoiler! I think it would have been awesome to read the climax through the progression as opposed to the beginning lines of the chapter. 

Upon reading the part about the water for the perfectly situated town makes me think about some opportunities I am asked to be involved in. Some thoughts are crossing my mind. That is all

2 Kings 3

For God to provide for life (the miracle of water) and to ensure that His people are given victory (the miracle of the vision of blood) is an easy task for the Lord. It is nothing to Him but it is everything to us.

2 Kings 4

These were a series of miracles that show how God uses people to bring life or speak life into the lives of the struggling and the dead. God is in the business of life transformation. He's not going to stop! He will not relent until we are completely His and His life flows in us.