[donnasweettttttttt]

when people are like “the hunger games just stole the plot of battle royale” like listen everything steals from the plot of everything the lion king is just furry hamlet westworld is jurassic park but sexier lost is edgy gilligan’s island there are no original stories and the only good piece of media is jennifer’s body

[ihavegonebzrk]

it's been a while

[ihavegonebzrk]

me: *is faced with a distressing situation*

brain: *shuts down*

me: no maybe we should actually deal with this

brain: ✔️read 7:26pm

[ironychan]

How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb? One or two?

One…

… or two?

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

a person from 150 years ago would be terrified by modern stuff . however , a duck from 150 years ago would just be all like ,still got lakes? yes ? okay cool

[meladoodle]

i really want to buy one of these grocery checkout dividers but the lady behind the counter keeps putting it back

[vaspim-deactivated20131011]

This is like the most innocent joke I’ve ever read

[memeufacturing-deactivated20161]

grass *getting watered*: nice they want me grass *getting mowed*: getting some very mixed signals here folks

[hayscodeviolation]

[prepgoth]

sing us a song, youre the piano man

[galacticgateau]

quilly joel

[earthdad]

having friends in different countries is wild because you can talk about what your country considers as biscuits for 30 minutes straight

[haunted-lunchbox]

[allieinarden]

C.S. Lewis: You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me. J.R.R. Tolkien: (plunks down full 1-volume Lord of the Rings with appendices)
 C.S. Lewis: (narrows eyes) how much tea you got

[joshpeck]

this is so funny & pure

[psyducked]

I’m such a happy Chewbacca!!

[officialjiggly]

my mom

[lampsarepeopletoo]

This is the best

[iguanamouth]

when youre pregnant you can only eat tiny miniature versions of foods otherwise the the baby wont be able to fit it in its little mouth im a scientist

[thoodleoo]

do you ever read an article so bad that it makes you want to get a PhD so that you can publish a response and thinkshame the author’s opinions with authority

[fistinginferno]

jack black is literally the only human that never needs any context for me. I could see him going anywhere and doing anything. like if i got abducted by aliens and saw him just wandering around the spaceship putting bugle chips on his fingers to make it look like he has claws i would be like ‘that’s some classic jack black right there’ and not even question it

[8168708]

i genuinely love seeing peoples really passionate and angry opinions about hobbies i know nothing about where they use a bunch of really specific terminology i dont understand. im just like (nodding) yeah man i bet it is bullshit that they tried to pass off hongus crongus as a 66 Gubbo when its clearly a standard fuckowski, in a blatant insult to hamsport-enthusiasts everywhere, they just never LEARN man