iicelived:
it’s moments like these that will cannot remember a time before ben andrews in his life ( he has friends, of course – the ntdp is as much a cult as it is a development program, u18s and u20s; usa hockey is do or die, you know ). but ben, ben is something else, a new concept when thrust into contrast with old teammates and ever present hockey. and yet he fits, slides in perfectly and will is going to hate to lose him at the end of next year. ( it’s become more than just hockey, somewhere along the line ). “ oh fuck off, benny. ” the words lack all the menace they ought to have, a smile crossing will’s face. it’s not normally like this –will is confident one, the one who smiles at ben and lifts him up after tough losses. that’s his job as his captain, as his friend. it shouldn’t be the opposite way around. “ —you ready to go? ”
in a way will is a part of a world that will never ever be ben’s -- perhaps at some point it could have been. if his brain hadn’t been so imbalanced, if he didn’t doubt every step he took like it was thin ice about to crack. will is unmistakably nhl bound and ben is proud of him for it ( even as he lets his own dreams of playoff hockey slip through fingers like sand because he knows better ). his parents say they would support him, but he knows they won’t settle for anything less than med school. he supposes he’s happy to have just shared in the light with will even for these past two years -- he’s looking forward to the impending season, he’s not looking forward to it ending. “ yeah. ” ben says, a smile of his own flickering to life, the last dregs of lukewarm coffee tossed back. “ you got more stuff to unpack or you wanna see if we can hit the rink? ”












