Untitled

[iloverecoverycafe]

Voluntary Emptiness - By Patty Powers

Voluntary Emptiness – By Patty Powers

There’s a saying that’s so familiar yet one most addicts and alcoholics in recovery continually forget….

….“Pain is optional”.

How many times do we have to hit the same wall before we start doing things differently? The answer varies from one recovering addict to the next. In early recovery, we blindly make choices that lead us toward pain. Often it ‘s because we haven’t yet acquired a deeper…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

What I Choose To Stay Sober & Sane - By Jeanne Foot

What I Choose To Stay Sober & Sane – By Jeanne Foot

After the alcohol and drugs are gone, what’s next?

The path of recovery, followed closely with the gifts of sobriety may seem like a hard sell at first.

I remember that very day, when I was being asked to choose between the comforts and certainty of active addiction, or choose the great uncertainty of recovery. The foremost thought racing in through my mind at this crossroad of my life, was…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Room for Rent; Part II - By Marc McMahon

Room for Rent; Part II – By Marc McMahon

Back in September, I shared with you all about some roommate issues I was having and the changes I made to remedy the situation. Here we are seven months later and guess what? New roommate issues. First, let me ask you this; have you ever had roommates? Ah, then you know at times it can be an arduous task, not for the faint of heart that is for sure.

It is one thing to have allowed an almost…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Addressing the Real Myths about Sexual Addiction - Robert Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S

Addressing the Real Myths about Sexual Addiction – Robert Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S

In the last several of years, a small sub-faction of therapists, primarily those who label themselves “sexologists,” have publicly and vociferously argued that sex addiction is not a real disorder. Most recently this occurred with a wildly misinformed article published in The Therapist. (If you’re curious, you can find that article here.) Interestingly, these folks freely admit that “some people…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Do You Have An Expiration Date On Your Expansion? - By Tsgoyna Tanzman

Do You Have An Expiration Date On Your Expansion? – By Tsgoyna Tanzman

  My dentist peered into my open mouth,

“We’ll have to take the bonding off your tooth if we want to do Invisalign.” (Clear braces).

As a middle child, I fell into the category of “good enough.”

My older sister needed braces, a dermatologist and a counselor. My younger brother needed glasses and an allergist.  In my family, resource allocation was on an as needed basis and even though my teeth…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Today's Conversation Over Coffee - Taking Yourself Out To Eat

Today’s Conversation Over Coffee – Taking Yourself Out To Eat

My lunch on Friday

There’s something just a little bit opulent about taking yourself out to eat. And I don’t mean to your usual fast food joint serving soulless food….I mean going to a proper restaurant with the best food, made by a chef that uses the best ingredients and creates dishes that are a work of art. The effort and love put into creating a beautiful plate of food is transferred to you.…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: You Are More Than.........

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: You Are More Than………

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:

You are, you are, you are. How many times have you heard about what, who, how YOU ARE? How many years have you allowed other people, society to define your being? Being in recovery gives you the opportunity to drop what you have been told you are and start defining YOURSELF. You are more than the lists and lists of apparent defects you have. You are more than any label that…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

I Want To Be Where I'm At - By Nicola O'Hanlon

I Want To Be Where I’m At – By Nicola O’Hanlon

I made a pot of my favourite Ethiopian coffee this morning, like I do every morning. As I flicked through my emails, I realised I hadn’t got my cup in front of me. I had left it down somewhere in the house, and now I couldn’t remember where. After ten minutes of searching and getting increasingly annoyed with myself, I found it on the floor, in the bathroom, by the toilet. Yes, I’ve been sipping…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Nicola talks to Arnie Wexler about Compulsive Gambling (Podcast)

Nicola talks to Arnie Wexler about Compulsive Gambling (Podcast)

  Arnie Wexler is a Certified Compulsive Gambling Counselor (CCGC), and was the Executive Director of the Council on Compulsive Gambling of New Jersey for eight years.

Arnie is one of the foremost experts on compulsive gambling in this country, and has been involved in helping compulsive gamblers for over 30 years. He has appeared on many of America’s top television shows, including Oprah,…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Green Living Helps Our Recovery - By Kathleen Russell

Green Living Helps Our Recovery – By Kathleen Russell

Mother Earth Day is celebrated on April 22nd. Saving energy, using less and growing closer to “Green Living”, is a motivation for prevention of further destruction. We have our warnings and action is being taken by many of us to clean up the toxins and chemicals from our environments to protect our Earth. So what about our internal environments and the fundamentals needed to protect and restore…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

What's Better Than Understanding - By Tsgoyna Tanzman

What’s Better Than Understanding – By Tsgoyna Tanzman

We all want to be understood.  This is a fundamental principle of our being.

To feel that someone truly “gets us, knows us, feels what we feel, and can relate to us.”

This resonance and simpatico is the strength of relationships.

But when it comes to “understanding” problems, discovering our motivations and why the problem is what it is, understanding may just be the very thing blocking progress.

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

My Very First Meeting - By Alana Haase

My Very First Meeting – By Alana Haase

I had mentioned some time ago, that I would post about my first twelve step meeting. I’ve gotten a lot of requests to tell on myself since then. My behavior is a source of hilarity to me NOW but at the time…

Well, let’s just say I was a little bit nuclear bomb angry, fearful and living in a cloud of constant anxiety. I did not ago to that meeting of my own free will. One of my dearest friends had…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Alcohol Awareness Month and the Stages of Change - By Jackie Stein, BALM Family Recovery Life Coach

Alcohol Awareness Month and the Stages of Change – By Jackie Stein, BALM Family Recovery Life Coach

April has been designated as Alcohol Awareness Month by the National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence, Inc. (http://www.ncadd.org/). The primary goals of this program are to make us aware of the dangers of alcohol use disorder (AUD), to help those who already suffer from AUD to recognize the problems being caused by excessive alcohol consumption, and the need to make life changes to…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Are You Struggling with Step Four? - By Robert Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S  

Are You Struggling with Step Four? – By Robert Weiss LCSW, CSAT-S  

  Step Four: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

For many recovering addicts, step four is a huge sticking point in their recovery. The idea of taking a long, hard look at themselves and their behavior just isn’t appealing – especially if they’re still engaging in the type of denial that externalizes the blame for their addiction. You know the drill…

I drink because my…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

What is the Paradox of Giving? - By Tsgoyna Tanzman

What is the Paradox of Giving? – By Tsgoyna Tanzman

  “Is it better to breathe in or out?”

I asked my client who’d been struggling with devastating health issues after a recent break-up with her fiancé.

“Out,” she said, thinking she’d captured some metaphysical wisdom in a metaphor about giving and receiving.

It wasn’t her fault, the paradox was in the way I posed the question.

Better isn’t an option when both are required

Both inspiration and…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Interview with Deanna Adler, Mother of Guns N Roses Drummer Steven Adler - By David Weitz

Interview with Deanna Adler, Mother of Guns N Roses Drummer Steven Adler – By David Weitz

Deanna Adler, Mother of Steven Adler, former drummer with Guns N’ Roses has a new book out called “Sweet Child Of Mine.” Our new contributor David Weitz, interviewed her recently in New York about her book, her early life and what it was like having her son addicted to drugs.

I met Deanna Adler in the lobby of the Paramount Hotel in Times Square on a Friday morning. I instantaneously gravitated…

View On WordPress

[iloverecoverycafe]

Rising Like a Phoenix - By Cassandra

Rising Like a Phoenix – By Cassandra

Rising Like a Phoenix

~~~

Pushing, poking, pulling up old memories-

Rising from tombs

Cutting, clearing, catching bits & piece

Time stuck like- a broken clock

~~~

Dreams-squeezing past layers & layers of

Denial, despair, can’t do it -regret

Pushing, poking, pulling me up

Cutting away roadblocks, clearing paths

~~~

Contractions- pain, umbilical cord cut

Creating a new birthing- me

Throwing off…

View On WordPress