[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

I've finally posted the first chapter ! 🎉🎉🎉

The link is here ⬇️

https://archiveofourown.org/works/89888241

Now I can take a nap

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

Recent shit I've done to myself without wanting to:

- forgot my water before taking the train (the posts where I complain about my stinky father)

- Got eyeliner into my eye

- Took strong meds and drank alcohol after it (DON'T DO THAT ! VERY VERY BAD IDEA !)

- Forgot (AGAIN) to put my lenses into the disinfecting solution

Maybe, just maybe I should see to take the tests for ADHD and stuff like that

[bebx]

[i-got-a-penis-yall]

TRANS PEOPLE CONSIDERING SURGERY- READ THIS PLEASE GENUINELY I AM BEGGING YOU IT COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE

If you are getting gender affirming surgery, especially if it’s your first major surgery, PLEASE be aware that you can become SEVERELY depressed afterwards ESPECIALLY if you have a history of depression or suicidal ideation.

Post op depression is a natural reaction to the crazy mix of hormones your body goes through after major surgery as well as the stress and anxiety of recovery. Think of it like an adrenaline crash, but dragged out longer.

For me it kicked in about 6 weeks after top surgery and the worst of it lasted until about 10 weeks post op. EVERYTHING felt IMPOSSIBLE. None of the skills I’d been practicing worked. I thought everything was going to be bad forever. I didn’t attempt, but I was in the hospital. If it wasn’t for my support system I probably would have attempted.

This is not regret, but it can feel like it. I remain happy about my results to this day (going on six years later).

This is not you failing to maintain your mental health, but it can make you feel like a failure.

Things are not hopeless, but through the haze of this depression they can feel hopeless.

It can be terrifyingly sudden or it can sneak up on you. I didn’t even realize what was going on until after the depression finally passed and my mental health went back to normal.

I am writing this post because nobody told me about this before my top surgery. I was caught completely off guard. For my subsequent surgeries being aware has made all the difference. Being able to treat those symptoms as an expected and normal part of the healing journey has made them far easier to deal with. Because even when my emotions go to dark places I *know* they will pass. I have been able to tell the bad thoughts to take a bad seat and focus on healing.

PLEASE have a plan in place for if this happens. I know that this topic is taboo because of how often our mental health is weaponized against us, but I desperately want every single person getting gender affirming surgery to be aware of, and have a plan for post operative depression.

[ailuromantic-deactivated2022122]

nobody tears through library books quite as fast as a 12 yr old girl with no friends

[ailuromantic-deactivated2022122]

only ppl on this post who matter r the ppl who r saying "me except im not a girl anymore" & "me except i wasnt a girl yet"

[leighlew3]

ALL. OF. THIS.

[tearstaineddangel]

either i post 20 things in a day or i dont post for 20 days

[selenophyyy]

Writing Resources for Vocabulary and Dialogue Tags

Vocabulary

01. Word hippo

02. One look

03. Power thesaurus

04. Visual thesaurus

Dialogue tags

01. 300 words to use instead of said

02. 550+ alternative words for said

03. 200+ other words for said

(These pictures are not mine. Let me know if you know OP!)

⚲ Visit Creative Writing Library 🕮

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

This is saving me

I'm working on a fanfic I'm writing and I needed vocabulary and there's only ai shitty mud while I do my research so I came here to find something that could help me, and I've found

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

My grandfather listen to abba in the car

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

My father's stinky being should be illegal on the whole planet and I still have three to four hours to sit beside him. Without water.

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

Please someone has mercy, I have to take the train with my father and it's hot, he's sitting beside me and he fucking stinks help me it's horrible that sucks so much and this bastard has taken a photo of me while he knows that I hate it

And it will be soo long and I forgot my water because of him

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

Help it's worse and I can't even work on the fanfic I started writing because i don't want his big ass nose on my screen reading my work and I can't do it on my phone because it's an android and the doc with the story is on a Mac (which my mom had to buy me because of my design classes that will start in September which need ABSOLUFUCKINLITLY A MACBOOK)

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

Please someone has mercy, I have to take the train with my father and it's hot, he's sitting beside me and he fucking stinks help me it's horrible that sucks so much and this bastard has taken a photo of me while he knows that I hate it

And it will be soo long and I forgot my water because of him

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

If I give someone more or less construct ideas and plots for fanfictions would it be written? Like I have hundreds of different ideas but i never manage to write these fics and I really want to read works with these idease these fics and I really want to read works with these ideas

yes

no

no do it yourself

Voting ended onAug 11

I can make the whole background thing (like characters personalities, vague scenes descriptions that will properly be written after, and all that) but the real writing part is so fucking hard for me .⁠·⁠´⁠¯⁠`⁠(⁠>⁠▂⁠<⁠)⁠´⁠¯⁠`⁠·⁠.

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

It's almost 3am and I'm overstimulated because of I don't know what and it just makes me want to d🐥🐥 or having someone thr🐥w a brick in my head to put me to sleep because I can't even stand myself right now (⁠-⁠_⁠-)

=⁠_⁠=

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

I'm less overstimulated than last night but coffee, while helping me staying awake, doesn't help with that and I only put a teaspoon of it (instant coffee) in my mug with the milk (I can't drink it with water instead of milk it's just like socks juice, eww) and two of sugar (it's a mystery why I still don't have diabete yet)

*sigh*

[buddie-romance]

thank you ao3 for being an archive and not an algorithm. thank you for letting me like things without consequences, thank you for being free with no ads, thank you for having lawyers to defend our freedom of speech. thank you tag wranglers. thank you to all authors and thank you ao3

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

Guys why is my handwriting sometimes so good it's so easy to read and other times so bad even doctors couldn't read it and I can't either like it's my own fucking hand that wrote it wtf

[imalmostmyworstnightmare]

They cut the grass in front of my door-window and it's too short I don't like it 😭😭😭

(I'm in a apartment building so I don't have a say about it)

And I don't like the smell of cut grass like eww