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one day we’ll know (Drarry Grimmauld Roommates AU)

blink @drarrymicrofic [477 words]

Harry has shit eyesight. Now, this has been a fact of life since Harry was a kid. He couldn’t see jackshit, and he’d been living with that up until the war ended and Hermione convinced him to get magical eyesight correction done.

And holy fucking shit was the world so much clearer than he had ever imagined. Turns out the glasses he’d been using for the past seventeen years of his life were not the most accurate (shocker), and he was seeing things in a whole new light.

Neville had way greener eyes than he’d remembered, and had Hermione always had that many curls? And since when had Ron had that many fucking freckles?

But the main issue was Malfoy. Harry first sees him in the ministry atrium (while Harry is in Auror training and Malfoy is making his Healer rounds), and he nearly has a heart attack. Because fuck. Fucking fuck fuck.

Since when were Malfoy’s eyes that grey? They were as light as silver, but dark enough that you could mistake them for being as deep as the ocean. And his stupid fucking hair. It shone like anything, and Harry could swear it was damn near glowing. It was hard to ignore, especially now that Malfoy had grown it out to his shoulders. And Malfoy’s face was not nearly as pointy as Harry’d remembered it. It was… pretty? Attractive? He was starting to see why half their year had fancied Malfoy.

And his physique- he looked nothing like he did when they were 16. There was almost an elegance to his lean but toned body, the form-fitted Healer robes hugging all the right places. Like he was some fucking model. Holy fucking shit, this is not happening. Harry does not find Malfoy hot like he’s some kind of schoolyard girl.

“Morning,” Malfoy mutters, walking past him while he gapes at him like a fish. Has Malfoy always been this gorgeous? No, there was simply no way. It must be an illegal spell. Or perhaps it was an imposter. Or maybe Draco Malfoy had decided to become a Veela. Yes. Yes, that would explain why Harry felt like he was losing his mind.

“Malfoy!” Harry calls out before Malfoy turns into the next hallway. Malfoy pauses, looking back at him, confusedly, as if he thought Harry was calling someone else.

“Yes?”

“You, er, look nice.”

Malfoy stares at Harry like he’s just announced that he’s going to elope with McGonagall. For a moment, Harry thinks Malfoy is going to yell at him, throw something at him, or slap him, and Harry almost runs away. But he does not, deciding that that would not be very Aurorly of him.

Malfoy blinks. “Thanks,” He mumbles, walking away. Harry is very grateful that his eyesight is good enough to see the faint flush rise in Malfoy’s cheekbones and neck.

kingofthemultiverse777

...Am I delusional or is this based off that one headcannon post I made that went viral?

roxey

my favorite genre of post. if only I could find more

xgermankittycatx

*not even 0.001 seconds later*

me realizing i have free will, a pen, and a single brain cell.

donutdrawsthings

my most sick and twisted fantasy

toacody

Borohkshi

Even the Makuta could get bored.

Source

Creator: Pohaturon

trainwreck-of-thoughts

No no no, see, a puppet obtains power at the expense of agency, a doll obtains meaning at the expense of agency, and a plushie obtains unconditional love at the expense of agency. The thing currently mauling you was already powerful and self-actualized when I brought it under my sway, so when you beg me to 'call off my puppet' you should really be saying plushie instead. Try again, m'kay?

trainwreck-of-thoughts

Someone tagged this "dog = plushie?" and then deleted the reblog immediately but I would like to congratulate them on being the only one to see my vision.

helphelpquesohelado

How I think Nova work's 2, Electric Boogaloo.

Crappy Illustrations of YOUR (mainly reddits) comments!

TYSM!!! school's been kicking my ass recently and its good to create again!

airriderscustoms

Adorable Galactic Nova inspired bull tank!

ID: M3J1YMML

helphelpquesohelado

How I think a Nova works

Say, you wish for a simple sandwich right?

Well... what kind of sandwich? What condiments, ingredients? Does it have to be edible?

What's the definition of a sandwich? Is a HOTDOG, a Sandwich?

No matter how many descriptors you add, language is an inherently imprecise way to describe the mind and a subset of possibilities, yet the power to pull from an infinite amount of options is reality breaking on its own.

To prevent Novas from overheating or spontaneously combusting, Novas were "programed" to pick one possibility randomly of the narrowed out options.

However this predicament is entirely avoided if you're a psychic, of course, but they left long ago along with the magic ancients.

some headcannons/notes

I think because of the immense power and the need to comprehend a near infinite amount of possibilities in a bracket, they just forcefully became sentient, and thus difficult to work with.

although they stopped the nova's from melting or combusting from a regular natural being, psychics and other magical creatures/things are still needed to get a precise answer.

i imagine it being a profession to ask someone's wish before the magic and technological ancients split off.

these guidelines have been lost to time, ensuing world ending disasters for Kirby games.

Novas being sentient, the simply interpret your wish into what they want to happen when only spoken in a language, probably just to fuck with people.

shanksxbuggy

other dudes reacting to shuggy: losing their minds because they can’t comprehend

japanese dudes reacting to shuggy:

also the guy with the nami pfp was the winner of the 4th One Piece Knowledge King Contest and clearly he knows his stuff he totally gets it.

hn-undercover-9503

shuggy is the funniest ship ever btw because you have one of the most powerful coolest and mysterious people in the whole world who is constantly whining and moaning and crying about his lost lover and how much he wishes they could still be together

and then it turns out the lover in question is the most unserious guy ever, basically a talking head who spends all his time getting bullied by his coworkers, literally runs a circus troupe and is an actual fucking clown

sundayroadkill

i offer you my unhinged “what if i broke dashs leg and ruined his plans for his future” agenda

(and big influence from @tatumsdrawing for mechanic dash cause they are correct)

existennialmemes

United Healthcare getting sued by its investors, because it didn't warn them that the CEO getting murdered (by the tendrils of their unmitigated greed) was going to lead to them approving more claims (for covered services that they had no right to deny) is a cartoonish example of exactly why their CEO got murdered.

Their argument is essentially "You promised us a specific profit margin that is not possible to achieve under this increased public scrutiny of your unethical practices. We only agreed to invest because of those unethical practices. So we demand compensation because you didn't warn us that you'd be behaving more ethically"

And idk. Satire isn't just dead. We've pissed on its corpse and now it's dissolving in lye.

kuromi-hoemie

this is one of those little details that jumped out and stuck with me since hearing about this.

crazy to take a business to court because they need to take “aggressive, anti-consumer” tactics. like right, making life increasingly harder and worse for everyone in the pursuit of short term profits is very intentional, and sometimes someone will just come right out and say it.

naamahdarling

Can we also talk about how batshit fucked up it is to refer to patients as health care "consumers"? Like we have a choice in needing care?

Truly optional shit already isn't covered.

THEY feed on US.

funnelcloudd

How come semi trucks in Europe look like “toot toot :)” and in North America they look like “HONK HOOOOOOOONK >:|”

“Henlo I am big twuck pwease give me wots of woom tank u :)”

“I WILL FUCKING PANCAKE YOUR CUCK ASS”

spontaneousmusicalnumber

@trainwreckgenerator why did you hide these in the tags

digitaldiscipline

This suggests that Maximum Overdrive was Jurassic Park for motor vehicles.

cheesedemon

I’m sorry, but that is misleading as hell. American and European trucks are bred for different purposes.

American trucks are bred for long hauls on largely straight roads. They can go for hours without a break. A European truck needs more breaks and a lighter load, and they would indeed take great internal damage if they tried to keep up with the Longsnout.

The European Shortsnout is not bred for looks, but for agility! They navigate the windy roads of Europe in a way that would be way too risky for the powerful, but more clumsy American truck. It is true that the European overheats faster at high speeds, that is the very reason that breaks every 4,5 hours are mandatory for both the truck and the handler and a day of driving can never be longer then 9 hours.

So, all in all, appreciate all of our trucks and our shared history, and be the responsible owner that gets the right breed for the right job.

kedreeva

To be fair, the US does have shortnose trucks as well, they’re just a breed kept mainly for very local work where, like the above says, they are working in places with lots of turns, shorter drives, and plenty of stops. I see them used for garbage pickup a lot, where a longnosed Mack wouldn’t be able to fit much less maneuver, and the short nose prevents them from getting rubs (raw skin or even open sores) on their snouts.

I would also like to point out that the tags have got it backwards. The wild trucks (which I’m pretty sure are extinct in the wild now) that all modern breeds stemmed from were shortnose trucks. We had known about automobiles and domesticated several species, but the truck species was not discovered until close to the start of the 1900’s, in Germany, which I BELIEVE was the first country to breed them in captivity, although England was the first country to really start using them for work. I managed to find a photo of taxidermied specimen

As you can see, it resembles both long and short nosed breeds, as well as the far more common house truck used by individuals instead of for commercial work.

As to the aggression, while the mack longnose LOOKS aggressive, they’re generally gentle giants (although please do give them space on the road! not seeing you in their blind spot is NOT the same as aggression!), it is actually the smaller house truck that is often trained by their handler to be aggressive: the keyword being TRAINED, they are also not naturally aggressive. The only time I have seen a mack be commonly aggressive is when they are pulling 2 gravel trailers, and I would be cranky if I was being overworked, too. If you see them hauling that kind of load, just give them space, and you’ll be fine.

ub-sessed

I feel like somebody should add something about the Australian variants.

nudityandnerdery

From my understanding of Australian wildlife:

dreorzen

Does anyone know if/how American School Busses are related to trucks?

Pics for reference:

The classic long-nose schoolbus

But short-nose varieties exist, I remember when they first started appearing in my district!

kedreeva

@dreorzen While school buses ARE in the automobile order, they are actually part of the Van family, not the Truck family, due to their passenger capacity. As you can see in the photos, they have no cargo bed or hookup, and are not really built for object transport. But they DO excel at carrying passengers, particularly children (although certainly not limited to just children)

They’re known to be exceptionally protective of any passengers, and if you look closely on that second image you can actually see a specialized appendage that is (I think) unique to school buses- a small, red, octagonal fan, which they extend when there are small creatures around them that they are acquiring or releasing. Much like an angler fish’s bioluminescent bulb appendage, this fan (along with several bioluminescent patches on top of their faces and on their hindquarters) works to mesmerize any other vehicles in close proximity, to where those vehicles will cease movement until the bus lowers the fan. It’s super fascinating behavior, and little wonder why we trust our children to these gentle, protective giants.

dirtydragonthoughts

Don’t forget about the bus trucks.

While these vehicles can sometimes be bred by accident (after all, who hasn’t accidentally left the gate open when your school bus is in season), they are usually bred for specific purposes.

These hybrids are bred for both their cargo capacity and their gentle temperments. Especially in a farm setting, there’s a need for many different kinds of vehicles, some of which sometimes don’t get along. Having a vehicle with both the strength and capacity of a large work truck with the amiable nature of a school bus can be a real benefit.

It’s a little unfortunate that these hybrids tend to be sterile, though, since it would be easier if they’d breed true. Also, something to keep in mind… bus trucks are bred from a bus.

Truck buses are bred from a truck and… tend to not be quite as useful as bus trucks, although some people do like keeping truck buses for companionship and as show vehicles.

hellsitegenetics

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Closest match: Freightliner Cascadia Detroit DD16, Cummins ISX15 EPA Common name: 2nd Generation Cascadia Longsnout