Arrow characters as John Mulaney quotes
Oliver: “I’ll keep all my emotions right here, and then one day, I’ll die."
Felicity: "Sometimes babies will point at me and I don’t care for that shit at all."
Diggle: “You know those days where you’re like, this might as well happen. Adult life is already so goddamn weird.”
Thea: “My dad loved us. He just didn’t care about our general happiness or self-esteem.”
Tommy: “Hey hey hey. Before you punch in another 'What’s New Pussycat'… let’s drop in one 'It’s Not Unusual.'”
Moira: “If it’s a true or false question, you should be able to add a third option, which is 'who’s to say?'”
Roy: "I was hoping that by now I'd look older, but it didn't happen."
Quentin: “Everyone get outta my way. I just wanna sit here and feed my birds.”
Malcolm: “The real solution is to not care what other people think of you. Should you apologize? No.”
Walter: “One feels like a duck splashing around in all this wet!”
Laurel: “And I would always think to myself, how could someone kill someone else? Like, how could they kill another human being? Then I got cheated on and I was like 'Oh, ok. Yeah, I’m not gonna do it but I totally get it.'”
Sara: “I have girlfriend and she’s a woman.”
Slade: “You know how I’m filled with rage?”
Donna: “… could be a nursery.”
Curtis: “I look like I was just sitting in a room in a chair eating saltines for like, 28 years, and then I walked right out here.”
Rene: “When people get mad at me now, it’s my fault.”
Rory: “I have had a very long day. I am very small. And I have no money. So you can imagine the kind of stress that I am under.”
Evelyn: "I don't want me to be doing what i'm doing either.”
Adrian: “And I said ‘no’. You know, like a liar.”
Dinah: “Excuse me, I’m new in town, and it gets worse.”
William: “No one look at me or I’ll kill myself.”
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