Notes

For my thoughts that knock incessantly until I've let them out...

[incessantknocking]

#3

This is my long overdue blog entry #3.  I’ve decided this daily blogging is not for me.  If it’s something that is adding more stress to my life then it’s got to be tweaked.  So, I think perhaps once a week is more realistic for me.  It’s going to take me way longer to get my 10000 hours in that way but at least this way, I might eventually get there.  

Today is Election Day!  The last time I felt this nervous around Election Day was in 2016.  I rule easily resign to state of apathy and call it a day and that is ever so tempting -- but that’s exactly what strengthens the powers in place.  In a way, it’s giving up and when we do that, we reinforce the notion (popular but untrue) that our voices don't matter.  In fact, it is our collective opposition to unjust laws and practices over many generations before us that has allowed us the freedoms we have today.  History tells us that the struggle was brutal and there were many casualties but change was made possible through collective action.  I find a great deal of hope in that and I'm very grateful for my more outspoken counterparts.  As for me, I’m not quite there yet.  My activism isn’t protesting, facebook posting or calling my elected officials because it’s just not what I can do at this time.  So, I voted.  It may not be enough and I hope that will change but it is where I am today and it is a vital part of maintaining a democracy.  So, it may not be loud or break down walls but I’ve voiced my preference.  Hey, if we vote in a different majority in Congress, maybe we CAN break down the WALL with our ballots :)

[incessantknocking]

Post#2

So, today I was thinking about connectedness...how we’re all connected to each other.  I mean, it’s really hard to describe ourselves other than in relation to others.  But it seems like we use that to make comparisons rather than identify similarities and empathize with each other.  Some times I find it so much easier to find fault in someone than to try and understand their perspective.  But, if we’re all going through the same struggle, then maybe we’re better of supporting each other though it.  At least that way, we’re not doing it alone.

[thatkindofwoman]

[incessantknocking]

The blogging challenge

So, it’s not some recent trend but it’s a challenge I’ve accepted from myself after reading my very first Seth Godin blog post.  The challenge is to submit a blogpost everyday for as long as I can do it. 

And, since profundity is a rare occurrence for most ‘normal’ folks, I'm preparing to keep my expectations low and those out in the ether who may be reading this could do that same perhaps.  If not, please stop reading.

It’s all a part of my attempt to pursue certain aspirations of mine.  It’s all very narcissistic when it comes down to it but, aren't we all?  So, at least i’m in good company.  To think one’s thoughts are important enough to put out there for anyone to find, you have to think they’re pretty significant.  Well, maybe I do -- or these are just my ramblings for anyone who may be interested.  Whether I think they are sensible, relevant, significant or not, I'm putting them out there so that I may make sense of them. For at this time, they are nothing but abstract ideas and strings of words -- just looking for some organization.  

Day 1 complete.

[thepowerwithin]

Your thoughts influence your feelings. Your feelings influence your actions. Your actions create the life that you live.

@thepowerwithin (via thepowerwithin)

[thejazzdesign]

May we be as strong and numerous as weeds, and as difficult to remove.

Ursula Vernon  (via fantastical-jess)

[postitforward]

✨ Mental Health Starter Pack for Times of Change ✨

Change can be scary. It can be difficult, overwhelming, and affect our mental, physical, and emotional health in all sorts of ways. Whatever you’re feeling right now, you definitely don’t have to feel it alone. Below is a list of resources and self-care tips to help make life a little bit easier. And if you don’t need them right now, pass ‘em along to a friend who might.

Got more tips? Reblog and add your favorites to the bottom, or make your own post and tag it #postitforward so we all know where to look.

Resources

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: Available 24/7 at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

Crisis Text Line: Free, 24/7 support for anyone in crisis. Text START to 741741.

IMALIVE: Chat confidentially with a volunteer trained in crisis intervention.

7 Cups of Tea: Speak anonymously with a trained active listener.

NAMI: Dedicated to improving the lives of anyone living with mental illness. Free to chat at 1-800-950-6264.

Trans Lifeline: Dedicated to the well being of transgender people. USA: 1-877-565-8860. Canada: 1-877-330-6366.

The Trevor Project (@thetrevorproject): Confidential suicide hotline for LGBTQ young people. Available 24/7 at 1-866-488-7386.

The GLBT National Help Center: Provides LGBTQ people with free and confidential peer support at 1-888-843-4564. Youth Talkline: 1-800-246-7743.

It Gets Better Project (@itgetsbetterproject): Communicating to LGBTQ youth around the world that it gets better.

To Write Love On Her Arms (@twloha): Dedicated to helping people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury, and suicide.

American Psychological Association: A resource for finding mental health care in your area.

NEDA: Help and support for people struggling with eating disorders. You can call 1-800-931-2237 or chat with them online.

Self-Care Tips

Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it.

Remember to be kind to others and yourself.

Drink plenty of water and don’t forget to eat.

Get enough sleep.

Have a movie or TV marathon.

Read a good book. Start a new series.

Read the #positivity and #postitforward tags on Tumblr.

Draw something or color in a picture.

Take a bath or long shower.

Write your thoughts down in a journal.

Turn your feelings into art. Make crafts.

Bake or cook something you like.

Go for a walk. Have a dance.

Watch a funny video.

Light your favorite candle(s).

Listen to your favorite music.

Take deep breaths. Try meditation.

Talk to a friend, a loved one, or someone you trust.

Make a list of things that bring you happiness. (This really works!)

Do some of those things! See those people!

[wordsnquotes]

I don’t pay attention to the world ending. It has ended for me many times and began again in the morning.

Nayyirah Waheed (via wordsnquotes)

[incessantknocking]

Silver Lining to a Trump Presidency

Today, I felt a wave of emotions hit me hard as I heard that America elected Donald Trump to take office as our 45th president.  I brushed it off at first because I woke up too late and needed to get to work.  But on my way there, I heard the radio coverage and I was confronted with the reality of what a Trump presidency might mean and I could no longer escape my sadness and despair.  I couldn’t help by cry.  I cried for my country, my parents, my children, my friends, my clients and myself.  As a woman, I was crushed as it occurred to me that my fellow Americans were so terrified or having a woman lead their land that they handed the job to an utterly incompetent man who has made a mockery of our entire nation.  While it isn’t the truth I subscribe to, what I hear is, a woman cannot do this job no matter how many years of experience she has, no matter how passionate she is, no matter how many people she has behind her because she is inferior to any man.  As a minority, I can’t help but feel I am unwanted in the only country that has ever felt like home to me.

But, it’s my fault.  I have been passive this election cycle.  Yes, I care about issues but I never spoke about them.  I left it to those who are stronger, louder, more articulate to fight this fight.  I liked facebook posts and laughed with friends at comedians imitating the candidates, and bashed Trump to my friends and co-workers but I never acted.  I am fortunate to live in a country whose forefathers and mothers fought and secured my freedom.  I have enjoyed those freedoms without ever truly realizing the blood that was literally shed to secure them.  I am grateful but I am ashamed that I haven’t done my part to protect them.  I think our counterparts in other parts of the world are weeping with us but they’re also shaking their heads at each of us that has taken our privilege for granted.  Over the course of my career as a social worker, I have worked with men and women who have fled from oppressive rule because they were persecuted for their race, gender, sexuality, religion, and/or political affiliation and I thanked God for my freedoms.  At first.  But soon, I got sidetracked with this, that and the other thing, most of which was unrelated to this sense of gratitude I felt as I was first confronted with my privilege. And, I never felt the urgency to act, like my clients who literally protested and fought for their rights risking death and forcing them to flee.  Even as a brown woman, I have more freedoms here than my brothers and sisters in various other parts of the globe and I hope to express my gratitude by working to uphold them and improve this society for all even in small acts of resistance when I am confronted with hatred or prejudice.  

So, this is a big setback but it’s not a failure because it helped to open my eyes about my privilege and pushes me to speak up and act to defend our rights as human beings.  I am privileged to be able to make that choice and it scares me -- imagine those who have to fight to survive -- which tells me, this is my awakening.  I am awakening to a new outlook -- one where my freedom is not guaranteed or permanent but one I have to be involved in maintaining.  And, maybe this is what my generation needs to motivate us to built a better tomorrow.

[quotethat]

To hold our tongues when everyone is gossiping, to smile without hostility at people and institutions, to compensate for the shortage of love in the world with more love in small, private matters; to be more faithful in our work, to show greater patience, to forgo the cheap revenge obtainable from mockery and criticism: all these are things we can do.

Hermann Hesse (via quotethat)

[amberibarreche]

[glamour]

Is the weekend really over?

Via @roxanneassoulin on Instagram

[incessantknocking]

We distort our realities to feel good.  It’s okay.  It’s normal.  It’s our mind’s defense against reliving the hurt.  But, what if I told you we are strong enough to hold the whole truth and thrive despite the hurt it carries with it?  

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

There comes a time when the world gets quiet and the only thing left is your own heart. So you’d better learn the sound of it. Otherwise you’ll never understand what it’s saying.

Sarah Dessen (via thatkindofwoman)

#truth

[jas--posts]

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wzml7k8p6rc)

Perfection. 

[these---days]

"We’ve begun to raise daughters more like sons … but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters."

- Gloria Steinem (via these---days)

[travellingaroundflowers]

[incessantknocking]

So, I first read this article about China's 'leftover' women and was appalled to say the least.  I couldn't believe that unmarried women over the age of 27 were given this label of "leftover."  This is an illustration of so many isms!!!! How rude!

But then it occurred to me - I'm around the age of the 'leftover women' and I don't live in China.  I live in the United States where we're way more progressive, right?  But why do I sometimes feel like a leftover?  This kinda talk would never fly around here but that doesn't stop women from feeling inadequate for being unattached or single after a certain age.  It's hard to admit that I feel this way because we're always talking about being in 2013 where women are independent, don't need no man, will get married when we decide we're ready or not ever and that's totally cool.  But do we really live in this world where we can do what we want, when we want, or not?  I want to believe it so badly but I just don't see any evidence of it.  This is obviously subjective but when was the last time you picked up a woman's magazine and didn't see an article that had tips on how to get a man's attention or how to keep your man satisfied (so that you can get and keep him)?  

I was once told flat out that I need to get married by 35 to avoid issues with pregnancy but also because "women don't age well, unlike men who just get better looking with age."  And it's not just that.  It starts in childhood and if you grow up thinking you want to have a family when you're older, it's gotta happen according to society's timeline.  I mean, there is medical evidence -- the older a woman is when she gets pregnant, the higher the likelihood is of experiences complications.  I'm too lazy to look up the numbers so okay, you get that one.  But that does not explain why unmarried women should be treated like discarded trash.  Is it maybe because we continue to value women based on their ability to reproduce? Hmm..doesn't look like we've come too far over at all.