Incomprehensible Metaphor

It's a lovely closet. It smells of pine and desperation.

[bysaestyl]

[boganjunkrat-deactivated2017011]

lore bioware completely ignored or forgot in dragon age inquisition:

thedas has two moons. they left a moon out im

the dalish treasure mages and gift magical children to clans without mages yet in inqusition suddenly extra mage children are all being left for the wolves

dwarves can’t enter the fade yet cadash still has a dream sequence with solas

THE MARK IS ON THE WRONG HAND ON THE GAME COVER

zevran exists

[bysaestyl]

the enemy mccree: kills my entire team by himself, pulls off ten thousand perfect deadeyes a match, says howdy to my stupid corpse while toting his 59348538053% accuracy like a trophy from the county fair

me as mccree: combat rolls off a cliff, misses a dva mech standing right in front of me, accidentally cancels deadeye no less than six times a match, too gay and gets tricked by genji constantly bc he said hello and i responded and he killed me instantly, worst cowboy this side of the mississippi and the other side of the mississippi and basically any orientation in reference to the mississippi, yeehaw weesnaw

[user-boxer]

This user is a writer but never writes 

everyone has that overwatch girl they’re eternally devoted to tbh 

[ghostmage-remade-deactivated202]

can u imagine mage discourse on tumblr, like

“mages who only know one spell are fake!!” “healer privilege is real” “uwu don’t call yourself a fire mage if you use ice too uwu” “mages who still have the robe aesthetic are valid!!!”

[spitblaze]

“Dont follow if you practice necromancy” “OP is summonerphobic :/”

[the-heralds-inquisition]

“Wow, you’re a shapeshifter??? So, are you like, a furry?”

“Staves are for squares, throw a fireball with your bare hands like a real mage.”

“Remember to check your mana before casting spells and drink some water after you use fire spells for long periods! Stretch your wrists and shoulders regularly!”

“Aren’t all mages technically rift mages since you all use the Fade?”

“I can’t be mage-phobic, I have a friend who’s a mage!”

“Oh my gosh, you’re a MAGE? But you totally don’t look like one!”

“I once got anon hate and I think it was from a blood mage so my hatred is totally justified.”

“Fire or ice? Excuse you, that’s spirit mage exclusionist!”

“You’re a necromancer? Oh, sweetheart, who hurt you???”

[tredlocity]

“i hate when warriors tell me to just magic an enemy away. like okay why dont you just fuckin sword it away then karen?”

[andrasteshaircurlers]

“Don’t follow if you use bloodmagic.”

“Lightning mage appreciation week!”

“Call out post: This person insulted battlemages!”

“You can’t be a mage and a warrior! Knight Enchanters are not REAL mages!”

“Saftey first! Always put your hair up if you are casting fire spells on a windy day!”

[gangrelslut]

ALL 👏 TEMPLARS 👏 ARE 👏 BLOOD 💉 MAGES

WAKE UP CIRCLES

[tomahawkbunny]

“Don’t talk to me if you get your magic from a higher power. I worked for years to make that tiny cat who sits on my shoulder. ”

“Umm new blogger here, do artificers still count as mages?”

“Why do the druids and the nature clerics always fight? Aren’t they kinda like, the same thing?”

“Sorcerers think their so cool because they are born with their powers. Well at least my mom didn’t fuck a dragon and I can cast burning hands without worrying about exploding.”

“The people who romanticize necromancy in the media really need to stop. I was raised by a necromancer and it was a real struggle.”

“DRUIDS 👏 AND 👏 NATURE 👏CLERICS 👏 AREN’T 👏THE 👏SAME 👏 THING 👏”

“Do clerics ever feel used by their gods?”

“Why are all warlocks so creepy?

That is stereotyping please stop.”

[spellcore]

I’m havin a ball

[theadhddragon]

@velvetandgold

[neonprotagonist]

having a horrible taste in fashion is a part of gay wizard culture.

[awkward-critter]

does that make Gilmore the exception that proves the rule?

[neonprotagonist]

Didn’t Matt describe him as wearing what was essentially a wizard tracksuit

[lanadelrowed-deactivated2017061]

yes he did

also gilmore is a sorcerer

[neonprotagonist]

Wizard is a broad term not just specifically about dnd wizards it’s just anyone who’s main focus during fighting is magic Examples of gay wizards with bad fashion taste -dorian from dragon age -leo from fire emblem -taako from taz -me

[thatbard-deactivated20180402]

>Dorian from da

What the fuck do you know about Dorian….what the fuck……wtf…

[neonprotagonist]

He wears like 500 belts

[evansbuckleyy]

a running tally of adorable things my 20-something year old math prof has said

-“hold onto your hats, kids, we’re gonna do some algebra!!! ….what? that’s a saying! that people say!” -“you know, they used to call richmond ‘fist city’. why are you laughing” -“so, if you start your weekend with $250, and you end up sunday night with $10- stop laughing, you’re gonna understand adulthood soon enough.” -“no, i can’t put my age in the spreadsheet, it’s gonna fuck up the results because you’re aLL 18 and i’m OLD!” -“i’m sorry an old man yelled at you, but that happens in the city. you just gotta get used to old men saying mean things. they’re mean to me too.” -him: “okay kids, someone tell me a joke while i erase the board” me: “my life” him: “you think your life is a joke now? just wait ‘til you’re a grad student. god i’m sad.”

[evansbuckleyy]

update: -“you think you guys have it hard ‘cause you have to do a page of math homework? i have 10 credits worth of classes, which is a FULL LOAD for a grad student, my teaching job, my OTHER job… i haven’t slept in so long. who has coffee. no, fuck red bull i don’t drink that shit unless i’m desperate” -“you know, space jam came on tv the other day. that’s one heck of a movie, kids” -him: “you guys can call me whatever you want, honestly, as long as it’s not old man” me: “who calls you that you’re like 25” him: “I FELL ASLEEP WATCHING ONE MOVIE OKAY. ONE.” -“i love my dog! he’s better than, well, most people actually” -“i’m not smart just because i can do complex math in my head! ….okay maybe i am but my point is you can too someday” -“you’re not bad at this just because you can’t figure out the problem! that’s why you’re in school. you gotta learn how to do it first! i believe in you!” -“are you telling me none of you full grown 90’s kids know how to use an excel spreadsheet??? i take it back i don’t know if i can do this anymore”

[evansbuckleyy]

this got like 300+ notes in two days so here’s another update for y'all: -“stop putting yourself down! you can do math! it’s easy for me because it’s my career path. you can do it, i promise.” -him: “uh….. i really should’ve worked this problem out beforehand. i forget how to do it.” ta: “dude aren’t you learning theoretical math? this is ALGEBRA” him: “shhhhhhhhh” -“google maps should be able to tell you how many douchebags are on your route. yes, ellie, i remember every instance you’ve told me about.” -him: “try this problem out! it’s a pretty cool one, the answer took years to figure out.” me, twenty minutes later: “…..there’s no solution is there” him & his colleagues, cackling like gremlins: “NO!” me: “you let me STRUGGLE for that long????” them: “yeah it was really funny” -him: “you have FOUR SHOTS of caffeine in your coffee…. is your heart gonna explode” me: “actually, maybe, i forgot to take my heart meds this morning” him, doing a perfect impression of the caveman spongebob meme: “WHAT THE FU C K ELL IE”

[evansbuckleyy]

another update for today -him: “so the variable is….” me: “i don’t…. know” him: “[strangled shrieking]” me: “you good?” him: “i am a hollowed out shell of a man” -me: “bruh” him: “don’t call me bruh” me: “sorry dude” him: “that’s better” -“you know those old 90’s karate movies with the sensei that’s a complete asshole? i’d like to be like that, but for math. the asshole math sensei. that’s me” -“i’m so old. do you even know what top gun is??? knowing space jam is one thing, but if you don’t know what top gun is i’m too old to be friends with you”

[evansbuckleyy]

we’ve almost reached 2k… time for another update -me, getting my test back: “i hate myself” him: “wait til you hit your mid-twenties. then that self hatred will really start solidifying” -me: “so i /will/ pass out, but you don’t have to call an ambulance” him: “you’ve been in my class for an entire month ellie. why do you wait to tell me important things? i get memes in my email but i don’t get to know important health concerns.” -“apples are fun to throw at stop signs. what, i was young once” -“i had GREAT sleep last night. like, four entire hours. god it was wonderful” -him: “matrices really get me going” me: “uh, what?” him: “that means it makes you excited right?” me: “yes but probably not the way you wanted to mean”

[yourplayersaidwhat]

“Congratulations, you rolled so poorly that you turned the GM straight.”

(via yourplayersaidwhat)

[iguanamouth]

Can you draw a tiny lizard dragon that secretly hoards pennies?

[nightkunoichi-deactivated202111]

I will never not reblog this little cutie

[feyre-fireheart-cursebreaker]

This is a gift

[vamren-blog]

Awe

[grawly]

[foxdear]

hmmm

[grawly]

[foxdear]

[teambisexual]

reblog this and put the age you realised you were not straight in the tags

[iguanamouth]

Consider: crabs.... but with paws

dont touch

[iguanamouth]

YOU FOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[camwyn]

No shouting ‘fire’ in a crowded theater. And no yelling ‘who here’s seen Snowpiercer?’ on a crowded blue line T train when it’s 7 degrees Fahrenheit out and Boston is covered in waist high snow.

[potatoesandsunshine]

tary: it seems that you are a magic user as well

pike, who just resurrected someone and is an astral projection made of divine jello at this very moment: i dabble

[aprilmr]

☼  sunshine  ☼